We've watched the scale go up together, wanna watch it go down? - Page 11

[lifeguard]

That's right Rosemary.

So I think I have located my problem. I just don't want to do it anymore. I worked so hard throughout the pregnancy with working out & nutrition. The whole time I kept telling myself I would reap the rewards after she was born & in some ways I have (yeah, no more diabetes) but in the big, noticeable, tangible ways there has been no improvement. 40lbs even sounds good but the fact is I am taking up no less physical space than I was a year ago (I still don't understand that) & so the change feels somewhat meaningless. Plain & simple I put in a lot of work & just have not realized the results I had hoped for & that is beyond frustrating.

So here is my realization: I don't want to do it but that is irrelevant. I need to be eating well & working out to maintain my health, set a good example for my children & create good habits for all of us. Yes, it is hard & no fun & the results are ridiculously slow in coming but it still needs to be done.

Dh & I talked about this at length 'cause a big, big part of me wants to just say forget it, I'm fat & that's ok but for my health & that of our family it is not ok.

So tomorrow I am back on track with everything. I am going to be committed & try really hard to keep the bigger picture in view & ignore how much I despise my body (why is it so hard to remember the fabulous job it did/does of carrying & birthing & nourishing my children?) for now. I'm going to have faith that if I keep doing what needs to be done I will get to where I want to be, even if the journey is a lot longer & more complicated than I had hoped.

Bonus: a friend of mine is organizing a "biggest loser" contest that will be starting in a couple of weeks. I am most definitely going to enter & I hope it will give me a little extra push to get me through.

I think once I get some real momentum going it will get easier again.

[cbeclipse]

I can relate lifeguard. I just don't want to do it anymore either. But, like you said, it's something I have to do for my family. I am back on track today. I will let you know how my day goes.........I CAN do this!!

[RosemaryS-F]

That's pretty powerful, Lifeguard. I think that if it comes down to it, that is what it means for most of us in this boat. I haven't lost any weight all month. I'm only 4 lbs from my pre-preg weight, but my stomach (I noticed yesterday) looks 4 months pregnant when I relax. I put on my coat from last year and the waist was tight and the boobs, forget about it. Discouraged is a gentle word.

[emmaegbert]

well, I thought I had posted something recently that I guess I haven't... I so feel what you are saying Lifeguard. Its just not fair that it has to be so hard for some of us. And I totally relate to the frustration of having been so strict during pregnancy and feeling like it "got me nowhere" (I gained 35 lbs! NOW, I had excellent blood sugar the whole time, my full-term baby was born healthy and actually smaller than my others, etc... so that is all good...)

I am determined to continue doing what I know is good for me (daily walking, eating a whole foods-based, low-carb/sugar/grain diet) because it makes me feel good and its good for my health. But, I also was just looking at pictures from my second child's first birthday and realizing that I looked and felt really good then (not perfect! but pretty good) and I had waited until she was 8m to get "on track". My baby isn't even 3 months old yet. Ladies: it hasn't been that long.

[lifeguard]

emma - you're right - it hasn't been long. People keep saying "you JUST had a baby" ---- but I wanted something spectacular & magical to happen to my body (you know, besides making a baby)!!! Patience is hard!

[~pi]

I am so with everyone on the not wanting to do it right now. I am giving myself permission to continue slacking off while I have a few big life things going on, but in a couple of weeks it will be time to get back on the wagon. I've been stress eating like mad and have gained 6-10 lbs since my lowest point pp. I am not thrilled about that, especially given that I started about 9-10 lbs over my personal ideal, so now I have 15-20 lbs to lose, which is going to take some serious effort. I know I can do it, I just don't particularly want to right now.

[Snugglebugmom]

Originally Posted by ~pi I know I can do it, I just don't particularly want to right now.

This is me all over. I was back at pre-pregnancy weight after a week or so, I didn't gain much. But pre-pregnancy weight is about 16 pounds heavier than I should be. I just can't seem to muster up the motivation to get down to business. I'm holding steady at 166 despite frequent and generous amounts of potato chips and chocolate, and I feel like although I could stand to lose the weight (I'm 5'6"), it's not a medical necessity and I just can't be bothered right now. Lousy attitude is my biggest problem!

[cbeclipse]

I've been doing pretty well the last few days!!! Yay!

We'll see what happens when I go to Weight Watchers on Monday.

I really need to start exercising. I just don't know when. I am way too tired to do it at night after Landon goes to bed. I guess when he gets older I can bring him to the gym with me and he can go into the childcare room.

[RosemaryS-F]

I stuck to my plan (more or less) and lost nothing this week. Boo hoo.

[lifeguard]

Good work Rosemary. I recently read that starting a new direction in something is like changing the direction of a fan. It takes a lot of energy at the start just to stop the current direction of the fan & get it moving the other way. So when you're putting in that first bit of effort that seems to yield no results it's just that it's laying the groundwork for the future.

[emmaegbert]

well now I have a stomach bug. maybe it will make up for the 3 days i spent trapped in the apartment with a sick 2yo eating whatever I could grab and getting almost no exercise. And, what a waste- I barfed up the most seriously healthy dinner... no ice cream or any indulgences.

just kidding. I feel like crap. But, just temporary.

[lifeguard]

feel better quick emma

[RosemaryS-F]

Feel better Emma. (Mint chip ice cream isn't so bad coming up.)

[RosemaryS-F]

Thank you, Lifeguard. In review, I see there are some BLTs that I could have done better with (bites, licks, tastes.) So I guess I will look at that. I'm headed toward a new "decade" on the scale, which is why I would like to lose at least a fraction of a pound, just to see that change. I have a digital scale that does .2s and I'm at 140.0. For a solid week.

[livacreature]

Okay, while I don't think I've actually lost weight (I rarely weigh and don't own a scale), the jeans I bought four weeks PP because my prebaby jeans would zip, but weren't comfy are getting too loose.  My prebaby jeans still don't look right, so while I bought two sizes up, I'll probably have to get a pair or two inbetween the two to go a few months.  I still FEEL bigger.  I think it is that my core muscles are shot, I plan to start working those.  My stomach isn't big, really, it is just doughy.  Hoping to rejoin the Y so I can go after work in the evenings.  I love swimming and need access to an indoor pool before our neighborhood pool opens after memorial day. 

We've also joined a CSA so I will be forced to make more veggie based recipes as opposed to carb/meat based.  This is good.

I hope you are on the mend, Emma!

[mythik]

A little reminder...Spring is around the corner and we can all plan on just being outside, going for walks and enjoying the warmer weather - we'll also be closer to 6mos PP and ready to work on things.  I say take it easy on yourself....it's a mindset and hard to gear up for.  I am going to be 40yo this year and the weight used to just drop off me and now not so much.  I've also had to relearn how I ate before being preggy and nursing for 1.5yrs with DS where BFing took care of those extra calories.  I eat well so I'm not hungry but I'm used to eating more....I like training my body to this new way of being but it's also taking some getting used to.

[lifeguard]

Good reminder.

Damn nap took up my gym time today. I can't win for losing. Exhausted but workout, rare nap but no gym time. Crappy trade off & I'm feeling pretty down about it, plus the house is a mess. Sigh- I want cake.

[dollyanna]

Someone today got confused and thought I was pregnant & showing.  Sigh.

I'm still kinda sore from the c-section. Is it safe to do ab exercises?