Dad is only home on weekends, need book suggestions.

[MummaGaia]

Hi all,

My hubby is a great dad, but definitely is always a month or two behind on what my ds is doing developmentally.  I feel like I am constantly correcting him and how he talks to our son, but I don't want to harp on him all of the time.  I am looking for a dad book that would be ideal for a dad that enjoys the aspects of Attachment Parenting but maybe doesn't understand why I think it's important.  My hubby is gone before we wake up in the morning and my ds sees him about an hour at night, so the weekends he is playing catch-up.  When he was a baby it wasn't as important that my hubby get the talk right, but now ds is a sponge and a repeater.

I would love some book suggestions that he could read so that he could understand how his words and actions now will affect ds later.  maybe something that discussed the importance of a working dad making the limited amount of time work for their relationship.

Thanks so much for any suggestions!

[Adaline'sMama]

My Dh was working like this in the summertime, 6 days a week, so I totally understand where you are coming from. Honestly, book recs for a kid that age is so hard because they arent always where the book says they are. DD is way ahead of what some books say and behind in other things they" say she should be developmentally. I really think it depends on each individual child. Here is what helped for us:

Having an open line of communication throughout the day- for us it was text messages
Sending pictures back and forth
Calling daddy at least once a day while he was on break
Making sure that when he was home, they got one on one time together. Id leave and go somewhere for at least 2-4 hours to give him to time really figure out where she is.

Basically, I felt like it was really important to keep him updated on what she was doing everyday so that he knew where she was developmentally. New words, new foods, things she figured out how to do, ect. Today I sent him a picture of her standing on the kitchen table, because it was cute, but also to let him know that she knows how to climb up there. Now, DH is coming home around 8:30, and even though Id like her to go to bed at 8, I let her stay up until around 9:30-10 so she can see her daddy because its the only time she gets to see him for 4 days out of the week. Its hard having DH gone that much, :hugs

[MummaGaia]

Thanks so much for your reply.  I actually talk more with DH when he is at work than when he is at home, we video chat, text, email, and talk on phone all day.  I think the thing that upsets me most is how easily DH is exasperated by DS so quickly.  I know that since I am around a 2.5 year old all day I can roll with the punches much easier, but I find it hard to not beg him to recognize this special little kid time.  Soon he'll be a pre-teen and won't want anything to do with us.  I find myself saying to myself, "I can't believe he's checking his stupid email while his ds paints him a picture."  I feel like he is missing the whole process.

[Adaline'sMama]

Originally Posted by MummaGaia 

Thanks so much for your reply.  I actually talk more with DH when he is at work than when he is at home, we video chat, text, email, and talk on phone all day.  I think the thing that upsets me most is how easily DH is exasperated by DS so quickly.  I know that since I am around a 2.5 year old all day I can roll with the punches much easier, but I find it hard to not beg him to recognize this special little kid time.  Soon he'll be a pre-teen and won't want anything to do with us.  I find myself saying to myself, "I can't believe he's checking his stupid email while his ds paints him a picture."  I feel like he is missing the whole process.

I feel this way sometimes too, but I try to remember that with DH keeping such long hours, time at home is his downtime too. I dont really know if there is anyway to convince him that he is missing out.