If my dd would sleep in the swing, I would do it. She won't. I think you're right that he probably just needs it so badly that you gotta do what ya gotta do. Okay, so yes she's still in her own room. I still have the co sleeper here next to my bed and I seriously get sad every time I walk past it. I feel silly, but on some level, even though the nights were miserable, I miss her sleeping in here. This may be our last baby because I have debilitating pregnancies (hyperemesis gravidarum) and it makes me sad to think that I just won't be co sleeping.
She's been going down a lot more easily. Some nights a bit tougher than others, but we are not spending the 2-3 hours we used to. It's crazy! I just sit there on the couch waiting for her to wake up, but she doesn't! However, she is waking every 2.5-4 hours. Four hours I can handle, but every 2.5 hours still doesn't seem right. She actually wakes happy too...so I don't think she's cold, hot, scared, etc. And it's hard to believe she's hungry after 2.5 hours at night. If I let her be for awhile (we have a video monitor so I watch to see that she's okay) she starts to get upset and it just goes on until she's crying so I go in. When I go in and she sees me, she smiles and coos and is just so happy to see me. But she makes it clear that she definitely wants to nurse. I'm positive that if I just took her out to the living room to play at 2am or whenever that she'd love that and wouldn't actually need/want to nurse. But SOMETHING wakes her...and then she wants to nurse back to sleep. If only that something wouldn't wake her. At least if it wouldn't wake her any more frequently than 4 hours.
The biggest consistent improvement since Camilia/moving her to her room is that she's less fussy and less resistent to falling asleep for her initial bedtime. So while I'm not getting any more sleep than before really, the nighttime scene is less draining and stressful. She is still wildly restless when awake. I was trying to nurse her this morning and she was sort of pushing off on the arm of the couch and she was practically man-handling me as she rocked my body all about the couch as I tried to hold on to her. (and she's in the 99th percentile, so she's a BIG baby). Arms and legs flailing everywhere but latched on as tight as could be. I think if I'd gotten up and walked around she would have paddled through the air to stay afloat and latched on tight enough to hang on without me holding her. It's craaaazy!