My partner works as a software manager. It is a project based industry and software is one of those things where one can't see the progress. Projects regularly fail, go over budget because product managers have wrong requirements or are continually changing requirements. The computer programmers always get blamed when things are late, wrong.
In the last 10 years my partner has worked for 5 different companies. One went under, one was bought, and twice he was let go. Recently he has a new, incompetent boss who was recently thrown out of a large company.
My partner is very honest, a good programmer and went into management because he knew he could treat people better and get better software out of them. People he manages for the most part like him, respect him. However he runs into problems when he has super aggressive bosses or backstabbing employees. He doesn't seem to know how to fight back, stand up to people. For example, at a previous company he had an employee who would leave for long time spans in the middle of the day. My partner spoke to the employee about this right before went on vacation. The following day the employee went to his boss and said my partner was incompetent. When my partner's boss told him this, he didn't say anything. He is not always quick to think on his feet and was shocked that someone would do this. I told him he should go back and tell his boss that it's interesting that this employee would say that the day after he disciplined him for only working part days. My partner wouldn't and from that day on this boss treated him very poorly, was very aggressive/demanding and seemed to be demanding that my partner himself. Needless to say my partner was very stressed and it brought tons of stress in the house. My partner looked for another job, but again he is not a person who sells his way into jobs well. He is too honest, doesn't embellish well and almost seems to wait for a job to fall into his lap.
I know the software industry is known for lots of turnover, but my partner's job history seems to have been like this long before I met him. We no longer live in the US where incompetent managers who like to fire seem to be more common; but I can't help but wonder if he needs some skills or something to deal with aggressive/backstabbing employees/bosses.
The only thing I can think of is non violent communication.
Anyone have any suggestions of programs to learn skills to deal with these kinds of people.
He said it was far worse when he was a programmer.
It is very stressful and hard to deal with this revolving instability. It has taken a big toll on my health