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Do you all really feel comfortable posting here?

post #1 of 13
Thread Starter 

I come here to read when I can because I'm going through a divorce and my life has been turned upside down. But I can't really feel comfortable posting due to how public this is. Some of the stuff I see on here I wonder if you all worry that your ex might be reading or mutual "friends" are reporting back. I've occasionally come across people in real life who know who I am even though I don't know them because they saw me on Mothering.

post #2 of 13
You should join is in the much more private lounge!
post #3 of 13

i dont post a lot of what i want to, but b/c i am a newer member, i dont think i can join some of the more private places here. :/

post #4 of 13

 

NO this forum is far to public. To my knowledge it is also Google searchable as well.

post #5 of 13

oh great...it's google searchable.  errr yeah, maybe i won't post.  See I was thinking there was a private one, and i know I was in it at one time.  But between serching for a new joba dn getting established after moving I stopped getting on the internet most places.  So I guess I was booted off the private one?

post #6 of 13
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Murph12334 View Post

oh great...it's google searchable.  errr yeah, maybe i won't post.  See I was thinking there was a private one, and i know I was in it at one time.  But between serching for a new joba dn getting established after moving I stopped getting on the internet most places.  So I guess I was booted off the private one?


 

Yeah, that's my problem. Upon moving out and trying to make it on a salary that qualifies for food stamps (though I haven't tried to get them yet), I was waiting to get internet. I ended up being delayed because Comcast made multiple errors and by the time I got back on line I had been booted out of the private forum. My situation is actually pretty good without much conflict, but I still don't want to post anything too detailed here. And I feel some concern for the folks who I see doing it when they are in difficult situations with their exes.

 

post #7 of 13

Indie and Murph (and anyone else having this issue).... if you were kicked out of the private forum and would like to re-gain your access please contact me (Indie- I just pm'd you). As I've stated over and over again- everyone in the lounge must check in once a month. If you do not, then I have to take away your access. This is what was agreed upon by the members of the lounge, to prevent members from "lurking" or gaining access and reading but not posting anything themselves. Unfortunately this has become an issue and I end up kicking out between 12-20 members every month. If I did not prune back members, and only allow those who post, there wouldn't be much point in a private forum if anyone and everyone could join and lurk.

post #8 of 13

You can often make a guest account if there is a certain issue you want to post more anonymously.  Ask a mod.

post #9 of 13

I'm confused as to how people are able to connect your real identity with your mothering user name. I'd like to keep my identity somewhat private, but do have personal issues I'm interested in getting feedback on. Could anyone shed some light on how you're being "found out", so to speak, by friends, family, or acquaintance  in your lives outside of mothering.com?

 

Thank you!

post #10 of 13

Personally, I've had this account since 03, so it's a name the ex would definitly know because I used it on other sites.

post #11 of 13

I'm actually kinda grateful for the being able to find an answer I was looking for with Google. =X It was something I was very concerned about, and when I found the answer I got, it helped me a lot. ^_^

 

So I guess for the newbies like me, it's good. ^^; 

post #12 of 13
Quote:
Originally Posted by StephandOwen View Post

Indie and Murph (and anyone else having this issue).... if you were kicked out of the private forum and would like to re-gain your access please contact me (Indie- I just pm'd you). As I've stated over and over again- everyone in the lounge must check in once a month. If you do not, then I have to take away your access. This is what was agreed upon by the members of the lounge, to prevent members from "lurking" or gaining access and reading but not posting anything themselves. Unfortunately this has become an issue and I end up kicking out between 12-20 members every month. If I did not prune back members, and only allow those who post, there wouldn't be much point in a private forum if anyone and everyone could join and lurk.



Once a month actually seems a bit much. I know it is what was agreed upon, but it seems like long-term members who have obviously participated over the years could have a longer time period. It seems like a lot of work for you to have to track every month too. 

post #13 of 13

I pm'ed you a few days ago asking for access but nothing yet. 

I want to tear my hair out at what the I wish he were my ex is doing now...
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by StephandOwen View Post

Indie and Murph (and anyone else having this issue).... if you were kicked out of the private forum and would like to re-gain your access please contact me (Indie- I just pm'd you). As I've stated over and over again- everyone in the lounge must check in once a month. If you do not, then I have to take away your access. This is what was agreed upon by the members of the lounge, to prevent members from "lurking" or gaining access and reading but not posting anything themselves. Unfortunately this has become an issue and I end up kicking out between 12-20 members every month. If I did not prune back members, and only allow those who post, there wouldn't be much point in a private forum if anyone and everyone could join and lurk.



 

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