c-birth/c-section/surgical birth forum request

[hildare]

please?  pretty please?  isn't it time we have one in birth and beyond? 

especially since it's really what many of us will end up with?  and now that there are family centered, more natural processes during the births and research to support it and share?

[Cynthia Mosher]

There was interest expressed in starting a Social Group for this topic but no one has stepped forward to request it. If you'd like to do that please let me know and we'll discuss it further.

[greenmulberry]

I would be an active poster in a c section forum! 

I don't really understand what the difference between the social groups and the forums are. At least I never seem to see the social groups on the forum nav. I would think a C section discussion group would be most useful sorted with the other forums that discuss birth? Otherwise how will people who need it find it?

[FrugalGranolaMom]

Since this is an experience many of us share, I would love to have a place for discussion. Although as the PP stated, I also think it would be more useful as a regular forum rather than just a social group.

[funkymamajoy]

Another vote for a regular fourm. The social groups are hidden and c-section moms are already feeling ostracized.

[CI Mama]

I would also regularly contribute to c-section forum.

Cynthia, is MDC open to adding a c-section forum to "Birth & Beyond"? A number of us are requesting it.

If MDC does not want to go that route, please let us know the rationale for not creating a forum and why you think a social group is the way to go.

Thanks.

[APToddlerMama]

I would like to see this as well and in a regular forum.  I don't like the social groups because you cannot post in them if you aren't part of it.  With the DDCs especially now, there are plenty of times I see something in the new posts and would like to respond to and would be helpful but can't unless I take the time to join the group which I'm not going to do if it isn't my DDC.  Same thing will happen if the c-section group is a social group.

FWIW, I think it would go a long way in showing people that MDC *understands* that some mothers must have c-sections and *respects* that instead of making moms who have had c-sections feel like they don't belong here or that their birth was a problem that shouldn't be discussed. 

[erigeron]

I have not had a c-section but I would *read* a c-section forum and learn from it, as, I'm sure, would other moms anticipating their births. I've also never had a NICU babe but I read that forum sometimes. You never know when the knowledge is going to come in handy both for the posters who have been there and those who haven't (yet).

[alittlesandy]

I just want to chime in about the importance of a forum like this.

An excellent suggestion made by another poster in the previous thread was "Birth After C-Section" where women could investigate and discuss ALL of their options (VBAC, HBAC, UC, or RCS). This is a discussion that CANNOT be had on a mainstream forum. I am just so tired of being told to go to a mainstream parenting forum when in every other way I am an AP parent.

Listen, I GET that MDC is supposed to be an advocate for natural birth. But even my midwives admit a 13% c-section rate in their practice and discuss c-section as part of their natural childbirth classes.

I think it's ridiculous for people to be afraid that by have having allowing a c-section discussion, we will send people running to c-sections in droves. NOBODY WANTS A C-SECTION. It's nobodies first choice. But the fact that c-section moms are not allowed to celebrate their birth, discuss their options, and figure out the BEST way to have a c-section (how to breastfeed immediately, etc.) makes a bad situation even worse.

[CI Mama]

alittlesandy, I agree with everything you have said, except I would like to ask that we keep considering the right name for the forum.

The forum should be inclusive of people who are not having additional births after their c-section. I'd like to propose that we just call the forum "C-section."

But I'd love to hear someone else's better idea.

[waluso]

I think a c-section forum is a good idea, but I do not think it should be combined with the VBAC forum. I go to the VBAC forum for support from others who recognize the downsides of c-sections and understand the desire for a VBAC. I have found the tone of some of the recent threads in the VBAC forum to be dismissive of the downsides of c-sections and less supportive of VBACs. I am all for providing information, both positive and negative, of VBACs, but I found reading how great c-sections can be dismissive of the pain and trauma that I personally went through. I don't expect that in a VBAC forum. I get enough of that in real life. I'm tired of explaining why I don't want another c-section, and hearing others tell me how it's not that bad, how it's safer, etc. But I do see the need for those who want to discuss c-sections, including the positives, to have a place to do so.

[alittlesandy]

I agree that most people don't want the forums combined. I totally get that. I have no problem with them being separate forums, which they probably will be.

However, I see all of my birth options holistically. I want a VBAC more than anything, and I see nothing but downsides to having an RCS. I always hate the assumption that because I want to investigate the pros and cons of RCS that I am dismissive of the implications of it. I have not seen ONE WOMAN in any of the threads I have read say ANYTHING about how great a c-section is, or be dismissive of the pain and trauma of it.

The problem is, we are also discussing the birth of our child, and to do so without being able to say something positive is a little sad.

I have the exact opposite problem. All of the women in my social circle, all of whom had home births, look at me like I have the plague when I even MENTION the possibility of a repeat c-section. This is a very real possibility for me, and I am TERRIFIED of it. Thank God there are some mamas who are willing to tell me it might be ok.

[Storm Bride]

Personally, I don't like the idea of combining forums under "Birthing After C-section", for a variety of reasons. I also don't like calling it "C-birth", because I have huge, huge issues with the terms "c-birth", "cesarean birth" and "belly birth" (the last one is my least favourite of all, admittedly). But, I do think a forum is a good idea. Why not just call it "cesareans"? It's fairly neutral, and avoids the "section" terminology that upsets some women and the "birth" terminology that upsets others.

I would like to see VBAC stay as a separate forum, though.

[Ms. B. Sprout]

Originally Posted by FrugalGranolaMom 

Since this is an experience many of us share, I would love to have a place for discussion. Although as the PP stated, I also think it would be more useful as a regular forum rather than just a social group.

[alittlesandy]

Originally Posted by CI Mama 

Cynthia, is MDC open to adding a c-section forum to "Birth & Beyond"? A number of us are requesting it.

If MDC does not want to go that route, please let us know the rationale for not creating a forum and why you think a social group is the way to go.

Thanks.

[Honey693]

Originally Posted by FrugalGranolaMom 

Since this is an experience many of us share, I would love to have a place for discussion. Although as the PP stated, I also think it would be more useful as a regular forum rather than just a social group.

This!  I have only had unmedicated vaginal births, but I would love a c-section forum.  I want to be fully prepared for all my birth possibilities, from accidental UC to planned c-section b/c of a medical problem.  To get any useful information on C-sections I've had to go to other boards.

[coffeegirl]

Originally Posted by Honey693 

This!  I have only had unmedicated vaginal births, but I would love a c-section forum.  I want to be fully prepared for all my birth possibilities, from accidental UC to planned c-section b/c of a medical problem.  To get any useful information on C-sections I've had to go to other boards.

This, exactly.

[mamapigeon]

I would like to see a cesarean forum too! I feel odd posting my questions about recovery from the surgery in the VBAC area.

[Drummer's Wife]

Yes, an actual forum (or sub-forum), please. Saying we could have a group seems odd considering UC not only is a forum - but there are two forums dedicated to it.

I do agree with Storm Bride about having it an all-encompassing C-section board. That way it's open to all to read or post. Whether you are facing a first c-section, are not expecting a c-section, are planning a RCS, are hoping for a vbac but want to be prepared for a more pleasant c-section just in case, or maybe you've already had c-section(s) and just want a place to reflect. Or maybe you are just curious and want to be educated or are a birth professional who wants to know how best to support moms/families before, during, and after.

There could be so many threads from statistics to hospital protocol to recovery times and tips, to anasthesia to breastfeeding to all the emotions that often surround a c-section.

I did ask about a c-section group when "groups" were first announced; however, when I thought about it and saw how the groups functioned, it seemed a little unfair to not give c-sections a decent, permanent spot on Mothering just as all the other forums have. I mean, there's a TV forum, after all, and that could be argued to not be natural despite all the MDC'ers who watch it. C-sections happen, despite the best intentions. It's disrespectful to sweep them under the rug and it contributes to the attitude many NCB advocates hold when anyone even mentions the possibility.

A forum for c-sections has always been shot down in the 6 years I've been here. Hopefully it can be reconsidered, especially since all these other drastic changes have taken place. There are so many other aspects that have "compromised" Mothering's ideals, IMO, that a place for like-minded AP and NFL mamas to discuss cesareans actually seems like one of the better ideas.

[Mom2M]

Originally Posted by Drummer's Wife 

Yes, an actual forum (or sub-forum), please. Saying we could have a group seems odd considering UC not only is a forum - but there are two forums dedicated to it.
I do agree with Storm Bride about having it an all-encompassing C-section board. That way it's open to all to read or post. Whether you are facing a first c-section, are not expecting a c-section, are planning a RCS, are hoping for a vbac but want to be prepared for a more pleasant c-section just in case, or maybe you've already had c-section(s) and just want a place to reflect. Or maybe you are just curious and want to be educated or are a birth professional who wants to know how best to support moms/families before, during, and after.
There could be so many threads from statistics to hospital protocol to recovery times and tips, to anasthesia to breastfeeding to all the emotions that often surround a c-section.
I did ask about a c-section group when "groups" were first announced; however, when I thought about it and saw how the groups functioned, it seemed a little unfair to not give c-sections a decent, permanent spot on Mothering just as all the other forums have. I mean, there's a TV forum, after all, and that could be argued to not be natural despite all the MDC'ers who watch it. C-sections happen, despite the best intentions. It's disrespectful to sweep them under the rug and it contributes to the attitude many NCB advocates hold when anyone even mentions the possibility.
A forum for c-sections has always been shot down in the 6 years I've been here. Hopefully it can be reconsidered, especially since all these other drastic changes have taken place. There are so many other aspects that have "compromised" Mothering's ideals, IMO, that a place for like-minded AP and NFL mamas to discuss cesareans actually seems like one of the better ideas.

I agree.
I had a c section, VBAC, C section and another VBAC. I felt like a complete failure by MDC standards when I first joined (2006 after my second c section) and didn't post for a long time. I think the attitude on MDC toward mothers who have had c sections and don't want to consider their child's birth a failure or comparable to a disease being removed from the body is the thing that "compromises" Mothering values. I appreciate having a forum where my "crunchy" ways are not unusual and CD'ing, BWing, child led weaning, etc...are not something off the wall, but the attitude toward c sections has always been a problem for me.
These new social groups are kind of weird to me and feel exclusionary. Putting a c-section area into a social group instead of a regular forum is just another way of ostracizing moms who have had them.