Chat Thread 10/30-11/5 - Page 2

[Leiahs]

Puente, congrats!  Willa is such a lovely name.  :)  I hope your recovery goes well!

Katico, happy belated birthday.  I'm glad you had a nice day!

Hykue, how fun about the dream!  I'm a little jealous of all you who keep having DDC dreams.  I'm lucky if I have a dream I can remember at all when I wake up!  Malcolm looks *very* much like my 8yo daughter did when she was a baby, so I have a pretty good idea what he'll look like when he's older.  It's nice to see into the future that way.  :)

Body image, yes, I can relate... For the first week or two I was absolutely, honestly, OVER THE MOON with how skinny I looked/felt.  Now I realize that my size 18 bottoms fit me awkwardly, and I still won't get into my smaller clothing anytime soon, and most of my tops look pretty frumpy if I don't have a baby in a carrier to cover it all up.  Not thrilled.  But at the same time, since I'm just starting to get out socially again, I've had a lot of people tell me how wonderful I look, and that's a good self-esteem booster for the time being.  Hopefully when I start working out again, it will take some of my negativity away and replace it with more hopeful/purposeful energy.  Cause I don't feel great about myself if I stop to look in a mirror, no sir.

AFM, I'm wondering if I ever mentioned that the hematoma on Malcolm's head went away about a week ago?  It was very sudden!  After weeks of looking like a giant head wound that would never be gone, it just decided it was time, and in the span of about 2 days his head looked totally normal again.  I can still feel ridges around the edge where it calcified, but that will supposedly go away with time, as well.  You can't see it at all under his hair anymore.  Hooray! 

DH was sick yesterday, but better today, thank goodness.  We sent the kids off to school in their costumes today.  And Malcolm is in his little reindeer outfit.  I love it to death, because I had a Cabbage Patch Kid when I was a little girl that came with a reindeer outfit.  Her name was Eliza Edie, I'm amazed I can remember it!  Looked just like this doll on eBay, but with brown hair.  Now I've got my little brown-haired Malcolm in a cute little reindeer outfit, too!!    (It looks even more adorable when I put his boots on his hands like mittens, because I haven't gotten around to sewing any mittens yet....)

 
 

[Katico]

Copied from the still pregnant thread:

So, just back from my appt at the hospital.  As much as I wanted to avoid an induction this time around, I actually feel extremely positive and relieved.

I am at 4cm and very thin, contracting regularly though mildly, baby is in a great position.  Barring any massive influx of labouring women or emergency cases, they will be calling me to come in early tomorrow morning!  The dr. said he expected labour to start very easily and that it should be quick and effective.  So....hopefully it won't require much intervention and by tomorrow night I could be holding our girl!  

He actually did a very (very! ouch!) aggressive sweep and I am feeling very, very crampy - maybe it will start all on it's own!

Plus, this means MIL will still be here until Friday and I don't have to worry about DD being taken care of or the first day or two postpartum.  SO relieved.

We're in the thick of Halloween prep here (DD (2) calls it Howleen)  She helped design her pumpkin, has a kitty cat mask and has it all figured out:

When kids knock on the door, she will open it wearing her mask, yell "happy howleen!", give them treats and let them pat our cat.  

Sounds good to me!

So, I guess the next time I post will probably be post-baby, unless I have time to kill in the hospital 

I can't WAIT to add pictures of our little one!!

[dollyanna]

Good luck, Katico!!!

[cbeclipse]

Good luck Katico!! So excited for you!

AFM, I've been having a very hard time emotionally. DP and I are really having a hard time connecting, and spend a lot of our time arguing. He is very quick to say things that really hurt my feelings. He, of course, says he is sorry after the fact, but it just sucks. I never saw "this" as being my life. This was a totally unplanned/surprise pregnancy. I've wanted to be a mama for as long as I can remember, but it was always with a loving/supportive husband. Not a boyfriend. Of course this is my own fault. It's just so not what I ever envisioned. Raising a child, for a large part, on my own. DP and I won't ever get married, who knows if we will ever even live together. I am sad for my baby. That he isn't being born into the "family" that I always wanted for my child. I know that I can do this, it just makes me sad. AND, now that I'm crying I will stop.

[lifeguard]

chelsea - I'm so sorry you are having a rough go. Something that has long given me comfort when I can't quite see where the road is leading was a card someone gave me during a hard time that said "Faith means not needing to know where you're going to know you'll get there safely". Somehow it seems things always do work out how they "should".

Baby girl is having a rough go & it's messing up all of our sleep. Her & I were up the entire night until about 5:30 this morning - her just fussing & fussing - not outright crying for the most part but just not happy - she would only sleep in very short fits & bursts. But then ds fell asleep at 6:30 last night (very early for him) & so he woke up at 5:00 this morning so I woke dh up to take him. So now dh is tired too & ds is so tired he actually just fell asleep in the bathtub! In trying to get him out of the tub he woke up & commenced an epic breakdown. Sigh. Why is baby girl so miserable?

[not_telling]

Connecting with DP - I've found that, starting with DS's birth 3 years ago (or maybe even as early as that pregnancy) that DH and I go through periods of disconnection and reconnection.  Disconnection isn't fighting or anything intense, it's just being involved in everything but, seemingly, the two of us.  I think it didn't help that we went sooooo long after DS was born without being intimate (co-sleeping was a problem for us in that way).  Right now it feels like we're in that intense newborn stage (heightened by the fact that we don't know what's going on with DD's breathing).  So, even though he's been home for the last 2 weeks, it feels like we're orbiting around each other.  But, I have faith that this is a phase that we will pass through...though it may take a few months.

Katico - Yay for impending baby!!  It's funny that it's the last day of October and while there are so many people who joined this DDC, there's been relatively few birth stories/announcements.

DD had her first chiropractic adjustment today...and I had my millionth...but first since her birth.  Whew, it felt good!  She's still breathing fast, though.  I was kinda hoping it would be like an instantaneous miracle cure for her.  She also had her first totally leaky diaper while we were there.  I was prepared with clean diapers...but no clean change of clothes.  Oops!  Then, about an hour ago, she had her first poop blowout.

DS's Halloween parade was totally cute, but I was perplexed by the trick or treating portion of the event.  They went around to a few different offices that share the building (which was great), but the treats they were being given were baffling.  These are 2-to-almost-5-year-olds....being given hard candies, hard super chewy taffies and lollipops.  By people who work for the daycare center.  Ummm...hello choking hazards (and just plain hard to eat).

Tonight's agenda: my parents are on their way over (my dad was apparently coughing and snotting all weekend, but claims he's ok now...honestly, I'm feeling worried about DD being exposed to any illness, but especially respiratory stuff, since her fast breathing remains a mystery), pizza dinner, DS's first trick or treating, then bedtime.

[emmaegbert]

cbeclipse, hugs. that sounds hard. I too have an unwanted/unlooked for pregnancy, though I am married with two older kids, its still been hard, feeling guilty about not being excited, and then guilty for feeling guilty, etc. With the twists and turns that life throws you... well, I agree with Lifeguard's sentiments. You have to basically trust that later on, it will make sense, even when things seem like they don't right now.

[starling&diesel]

Chelsea ... Sorry to hear that things are feeling hard and sad right now.  Trust that with time comes change, and that new parenthood is a minefield of emotions, hormomes, and overwhelming ideals that tend to sabotage our best efforts.  Be gentle with yourself, and if necessary, try to tune out the hurtful comments.  If you want to have a serious conversation with him, remember to HALT, as in don't do anything when you are Hungry, Angry, Lonely or Tired.  I know that with a newborn, we're almost always one of things at any given time, but if you can navigate around those times and find a neutral time to ask him to be more gentle with you, that might work better.

katico ... can't wait to hear the news!

[Katico]

Happy Howleen!!!!

(notice the yarn hair on the pumpkin - you know she's a knitter's child, she insisted yarn be involved!)

[emmaegbert]

happy howleen indeed, CUTE!

I am relieved... DH was going to go back to work tomorrow but decided to take one more day. Of all times, school messed up (well, cancelled) my son's school bus stop as of this morning. WTF? I think it will be back on and closer to our house, but seriously, the reason we have him on the bus at all was for the post-partum weeks and the very cold months of winter when walking the mile each way 4x per day didn't seem reasonable for me (with the two kids in tow). The idea of me going on the subway at 4d pp with an infant and a toddler... ack

[cbeclipse]

Thanks for the kind words everyone. I am SO happy to be having this little guy, just not so happy with the circumstances he is coming into. I believe that children are just always such a huge blessing. I also think the fact that I'm 41 weeks is making me more emotional and impatient about everything. I just want to have him already!! 

Lifeguard- I'm sorry that DD's sleeping is making things hard for you. How did she do last night? 

I'm at work. Think I have a slight cold, nose has been runny/stuffy the last few days. Kids here at work have it too. Eliza isn't going to pre-school today because of it. I would normally keep her home all day to rest, but I think that we might go to Target or something to get us out of the house for a while before her nap. 

[lifeguard]

Dd slept much better last night. Was up to nurse every 2 hours but she slept during the night & as an added bonus ds slept in until 8:15 so we're alla  lot happier today.

[not_telling]

DS's first ever trick or treating was a lot of fun.  He was hesitant at first, but once he caught on he was literally running from house to house yelling "Let's try this house!!"

[~pi]

nak

katico, thinking about you and hoping all is going well!

not telling, so cute! And you look great, too.

emma, that sucks about the bus stop. ugh. thank goodness your dh could take another day.

lifeguard, hooray for better sleep! it's amazing how much better you feel with a halfway decent night's rest.

cbeclipse, I'm sorry things are not what you had envisioned. I hope you enjoy the unexpected anyway. Hugs.

leiahs, great news about the hematoma!

Trinket, hugs, and I hope you found some fantastic jeans.

AFM, midwife appointment today and ds2 is up to 5.56 kilos, or 12 lbs 4 oz. And he is LONG. He has already outgrown sleepers that his big brother (who was a big kid, too, but not so long) wore at six months.

[StephandOwen]

Chelsea- my ds1 was also an unplanned baby, born in a relationship that I knew deep down was not going to last. I ended up leaving ds1's bio-dad when ds1 was not quite 2 months old. I was a single parent until we moved in with my dh, when ds1 was almost 4 years old. Please know that you CAN do this! And that there's nothing wrong with raising a baby alone. It might not be what you planned, but you will make the best of it and your little one will grow and thrive

[Amy May]

Katico- we can't wait to hear an update from you on your new baby!!

CB, hugs to you, mamma, you can do this.  Know that we are all thinking of you!

I can't believe my baby girl is already 8 days old!  I kept thinking back yesterday and Sunday and remembering exactly where I was a week ago, in labor.  I can't believe how quickly this first week has gone.  It makes me happy to see Palesa growing cooler by the day, and sad to see her face already changing and maturing.  Yesterday we took some pictures of her in the belly cast.  Didn't go quite as well as we planned, mainly because she pooped all over the inside of the cast, and then woke herself up.  But then I nursed her, she fell back asleep, and we took a few more pictures.

Today was our first pedi visit, and our first time out of the house since birth (my first time too).  I was on the brink of tears putting her in her little carseat.  We did it though.  She's hit her birthweight again, which is excellent, but I could tell from the amount of diapers and how often I'm nursing that she's probably getting enough to eat.

In-laws left today.  Their visit wasn't as relaxing as either of us hoped- it certainly didn't ease any stress on DH. MIL did dishes one night, but that is about it.  I wasn't really expecting them to do much besides want to hold the baby, and I was grateful for getting a few naps.  

[cbeclipse]

Lifeguard- So happy that you guys all slept better!!

Steph and Pi- Thank you. I know that I can do this, and will do this. I'm just emotional about these things lately.

Amy May- Thank you. Your little girl is so beautiful! Sorry the time with in-laws wasn't as relaxing as you hoped it would be.

AFM- Home from work. Had too much Halloween candy today.......hard to resist when you are surrounded by it all day. I did manage to go to Target and the mall for a few hours this morning. Have had a few random contractions, but nothing special. Trying the cohosh again tomorrow. Nipple stimulation tonight. Fun times......

[cbeclipse]

My midwife just called and wants me to go to hospital today for a non-stress test and sono. I'm going to go in about an hour. Hope everything's okay and I'm not admitted! I've had some lower cramping going on for a while this morning. 

[emmaegbert]

good luck Chelsea. Your MW probably told you this but make sure you are drinking LOTS before those tests. Low fluid levels is one thing they find very concerning, but can be caused by mild dehydration and it would be silly to be induced over low fluid if it was just mild dehydration, not an actual problem with the placenta function, you know? hope everything checks out AOK.

[RosemaryS-F]

Hello everyone. Now that I've finally written out my whole story I feel like I'm allowed to post in the chat thread again .

Katico, you're not here, you're having a baby, but I want to say I'm thinking of you and so glad this is finally happening. You actually seemed to turn a corner in your last few posts. Love your yarn pumpkin!

cbeclipse: I'll be thinking of you. May you find peace.

Amy May: She pooped in your cast? I'm sorry! However, it was a funny read. The picture you've posted is lovely. Sorry your in-laws were not clued in; at least that is over now. The dinner they made you sounds pretty incredible though! What is seafood salsa???

Halloween: DS went out with all his friends, who are the kids of all our friends. I stayed home, but here is a funny picture of him as a "princess":

I'm due to take more pictures of Iona. Any tips for good, artsy shots? I'm not a very good photographer.