November Chit Chat - Page 2 « Back to Group Discussions

[IwannaBanRN]

Originally Posted by Ablemec 

I went to L&D yesterday for an NST because LO was barely moving all day, which was unusual for him.  Luckily, he's absolutely fine, just tired yesterday, I guess.  But, the midwife on call was looking at my records and noted that I wanted a water birth and have a really bad case of SPD.  She said that she doesn't think the water birth is possible, and if she's the midwife on call when I'm in labor, she won't let me do it .  She's apparently concerned that if something should happen I may not be able to get out of the tub quickly enough.  My husband is very, very strong and has carried my big butt pregnant self around constantly late in this pregnancy when my SPD has been at its worst, so I know that he could get me out of the tub without a problem, but she wouldn't hear it.  I'm now super bummed.  I wanted a water birth even before the SPD, and now with the SPD the only time I'm comfortable is in the water.  I really hope she's not on call when the time comes, or if she is, somehow I can show her how I can get in and out of the tub.

That's a crock. If they really needed to get you out of the tub quickly, they'd be able to. She's just thinking of her own convenience. You can get in the water if you want. All they can do is advise against it.

[crazykittymomma]

Originally Posted by IwannaBanRN 

That's a crock. If they really needed to get you out of the tub quickly, they'd be able to. She's just thinking of her own convenience. You can get in the water if you want. All they can do is advise against it.

Exactly! And remember, you CAN fire an attendant at your birth. Might not make you popular, but they do work for you. I wish I had known that last time!

[Ablemec]

Originally Posted by IwannaBanRN 

That's a crock. If they really needed to get you out of the tub quickly, they'd be able to. She's just thinking of her own convenience. You can get in the water if you want. All they can do is advise against it.

The rooms aren't set up with the tub, it has to be brought in, so I couldn't just do it myself, unfortunately.  I'm sure she's just thinking of her own convenience.  She definitely dropped the "what's best for baby" card.  It really pissed me off.  What pissed me off even more was that she said this after remarking that I was moving pretty well for a woman with SPD (it's been a great few days, and I think I could actually beat my 87 year old arthritic grandmother in a footrace in this state!)  

There are, I believe, 11 midwives who are regularly on call, and then a few more who do occasional hours, so the chances are pretty decent I won't have her, but I had been feeling good about this group of midwives, and now this has just injected negativity into the whole thing.  She's the first person who I really felt wouldn't listen to me, and is just saying what she's saying because she's decided it, and that's that.

[TalkToMeNow]

Originally Posted by IwannaBanRN 

That's a crock. If they really needed to get you out of the tub quickly, they'd be able to. She's just thinking of her own convenience. You can get in the water if you want. All they can do is advise against it.

Unfortunately, if it's like my hospital, you can't get in the tub without following a lot of rules. One is the provider's consent at the time. Labor tubs aren't in the rooms; they are free standing birth pools that have to be brought it. So in that case, they just wouldn't bring in the tub. 

[TalkToMeNow]

Originally Posted by Ablemec 

The rooms aren't set up with the tub, it has to be brought in, so I couldn't just do it myself, unfortunately.  I'm sure she's just thinking of her own convenience.  She definitely dropped the "what's best for baby" card.  It really pissed me off.  What pissed me off even more was that she said this after remarking that I was moving pretty well for a woman with SPD (it's been a great few days, and I think I could actually beat my 87 year old arthritic grandmother in a footrace in this state!)  

There are, I believe, 11 midwives who are regularly on call, and then a few more who do occasional hours, so the chances are pretty decent I won't have her, but I had been feeling good about this group of midwives, and now this has just injected negativity into the whole thing.  She's the first person who I really felt wouldn't listen to me, and is just saying what she's saying because she's decided it, and that's that.

X-posted with you.  11 is a good number... your odds sound good. I'm sorry that you have to deal with negativity towards the practice. Maybe you can talk to one of the other midwives about it at your next appointment.
 

[jbk21]

Originally Posted by TalkToMeNow 

So dh informed me this morning that his "week" off when baby is born is actually more like 3.25 days. How do you even get 1/4 of a day?? Anyway, woo! I'm so pumped! What else can I do but laugh? Okay, and sigh.... 

Anyone want some kids? Or want to send me an unwanted relative who is trying to come stay with them? 

I'm spending an exciting morning completing my online Girl Scout cookie sale training. It's hours (or feels like it) of low budget videos on selling cookies! Yes! 

I'll send you my MIL.  She's a trip.  Good luck. LOL!

 

Originally Posted by Abraisme 

You can have my mom.  She's very AP and helpful, but has a lot of opinions and advice.    She won't be at my birth because I invited my MIL (who's great, but a totally different person) and it would NEVER work out to have them both here.    Also, my older sister is due with baby #1 on Dec. 24th, so she's traveling there for her birth (and she was at my last 2 births).  Anyway, you can have her, good luck with that!  ;)

My DH was supposed to get 2 weeks off when we had our DD.  It ended up being about 3.5 days, so I know how it goes.  Luckily his work is very close and he can often work from home, so it's a little different situation.  I told him this time to get the time off NOW and give them the expectation that he's not showing up, period.  We'll see...
 

My DH was supposed to have 2 weeks off with DS1, but we had to schedule it in advance (dumb) so we scheduled it from our due date on, of course.  Then baby was 10 days late... so DH went back to work the day after we came home from the hospital.  UGH.  This time he gets 2 weeks from when I go into labor, then is only going back 4 days a week through the new year.  He has a ton of vacation time, so I'm really excited that he'll be here so much!
 

Originally Posted by Ablemec 

I went to L&D yesterday for an NST because LO was barely moving all day, which was unusual for him.  Luckily, he's absolutely fine, just tired yesterday, I guess.  But, the midwife on call was looking at my records and noted that I wanted a water birth and have a really bad case of SPD.  She said that she doesn't think the water birth is possible, and if she's the midwife on call when I'm in labor, she won't let me do it .  She's apparently concerned that if something should happen I may not be able to get out of the tub quickly enough.  My husband is very, very strong and has carried my big butt pregnant self around constantly late in this pregnancy when my SPD has been at its worst, so I know that he could get me out of the tub without a problem, but she wouldn't hear it.  I'm now super bummed.  I wanted a water birth even before the SPD, and now with the SPD the only time I'm comfortable is in the water.  I really hope she's not on call when the time comes, or if she is, somehow I can show her how I can get in and out of the tub.

Um, did you tell her to suck it?  Because that's ridiculous.  Can you talk to some of the other MWs about it?  Maybe they'll set her straight.  

[IwannaBanRN]

Originally Posted by crazykittymomma 

Exactly! And remember, you CAN fire an attendant at your birth. Might not make you popular, but they do work for you. I wish I had known that last time!

 I wish I could have fired a nurse from last time who wouldn't shut up about "don't feel like a failure if you want to ask for the epidural".  I think she was annoyed with how much I wanted to be up and moving around.

Originally Posted by Ablemec 

The rooms aren't set up with the tub, it has to be brought in, so I couldn't just do it myself, unfortunately.  I'm sure she's just thinking of her own convenience.  She definitely dropped the "what's best for baby" card.  It really pissed me off.  What pissed me off even more was that she said this after remarking that I was moving pretty well for a woman with SPD (it's been a great few days, and I think I could actually beat my 87 year old arthritic grandmother in a footrace in this state!)  

There are, I believe, 11 midwives who are regularly on call, and then a few more who do occasional hours, so the chances are pretty decent I won't have her, but I had been feeling good about this group of midwives, and now this has just injected negativity into the whole thing.  She's the first person who I really felt wouldn't listen to me, and is just saying what she's saying because she's decided it, and that's that.

I'm sorry. I hate it when I hear OB's, nurses and midwives play the "dead baby/what's best for the baby" card. Of COURSE you're trying to think of what's best for the baby, or you wouldn't be trying for a more gentle entrance for your baby. You're not just doing this for you. I am hoping to GOD you don't get this horrible woman as an attending midwife. If you do end up with her, you might do well to ask a nurse or someone else in attendance who all is there so you can ask to avoid having her. This is SOOO the reason I want to be a midwife. I hate the judgment and closed-mindedness that is the healthcare in our country. It makes me so sad.
 

[TalkToMeNow]

OT- Becky, I just noticed the name in your sig... Levi. Is that new or am I unobservant? Love the name! It was on my short list. :)

[TalkToMeNow]

Originally Posted by jbk21 

I'll send you my MIL.  She's a trip.  Good luck. LOL!

 

My DH was supposed to have 2 weeks off with DS1, but we had to schedule it in advance (dumb) so we scheduled it from our due date on, of course.  Then baby was 10 days late... so DH went back to work the day after we came home from the hospital.  UGH.  This time he gets 2 weeks from when I go into labor, then is only going back 4 days a week through the new year.  He has a ton of vacation time, so I'm really excited that he'll be here so much!
 

That's awesome about his time off! The one thing that makes me feel better is that dh's company has really good holiday time. Well, it seems really good to me, anyway! So he should get at least three days for Thanksgiving and 1.5 weeks for Christmas. That will be nice! The three girls will all be off for a week for Thanksgiving and two for Christmas. They may be spending some time with Nana and Papa during those weeks. 

[IwannaBanRN]

Originally Posted by TalkToMeNow 

OT- Becky, I just noticed the name in your sig... Levi. Is that new or am I unobservant? Love the name! It was on my short list. :)

It's new. I decided last week on Levi Jaxson. I haven't heard a name I liked more than this one.

[jbk21]

Amanda, that's great that he gets good holiday time.  That will be a nice treat with the new baby :-)

[TalkToMeNow]

Originally Posted by IwannaBanRN 

It's new. I decided last week on Levi Jaxson. I haven't heard a name I liked more than this one.

Well, I love it, too. Good choice! 

[Ablemec]

Originally Posted by IwannaBanRN 

 I wish I could have fired a nurse from last time who wouldn't shut up about "don't feel like a failure if you want to ask for the epidural".  I think she was annoyed with how much I wanted to be up and moving around.

I'm sorry. I hate it when I hear OB's, nurses and midwives play the "dead baby/what's best for the baby" card. Of COURSE you're trying to think of what's best for the baby, or you wouldn't be trying for a more gentle entrance for your baby. You're not just doing this for you. I am hoping to GOD you don't get this horrible woman as an attending midwife. If you do end up with her, you might do well to ask a nurse or someone else in attendance who all is there so you can ask to avoid having her. This is SOOO the reason I want to be a midwife. I hate the judgment and closed-mindedness that is the healthcare in our country. It makes me so sad.
 

I have a magnificent doula who has attended many, many births at this hospital.  She knows the nurses very well, especially the pro-natural birth ones, and I fully intend on enlisting my doula's support to get the best care attendants I can.  Hopefully there will be a choice!

[birdhappy85]

Ablemec - That's so silly about that midwife not wanting you to birth in the water! I hope you have someone else deliver your baby. When I started having SPD pain, my midwife specifically told me that a water birth would be the BEST option for someone with SPD! She said being flat on my back on a bed is most likely to cause pain and/or damage.

[jbk21]

Wow we have a lot of SPD mamas.  Are you all holding up okay?  I'll be 38 weeks this week (HOLY CRAP) and I am DYING.  I can hardly walk.  Getting out of bed is a nightmare.  Anyone found anything that works for them?  My chiro can only help a little and then a few days later it's back to excruciating pain....

[IwannaBanRN]

Originally Posted by Ablemec 

I have a magnificent doula who has attended many, many births at this hospital.  She knows the nurses very well, especially the pro-natural birth ones, and I fully intend on enlisting my doula's support to get the best care attendants I can.  Hopefully there will be a choice!

Awesome! One thing I've learned this pregnancy, is resources, resources, resources! I have my fingers crossed for you, mama!
 

[crazykittymomma]

The only thing that seems to help me is frequent chiro visits. :/

[jbk21]

Originally Posted by crazykittymomma 

The only thing that seems to help me is frequent chiro visits. :/

Argh, I'm going weekly already... I think I'm doing too much- carrying my toddler too much, vacuuming too much (OMG do I get sore after I vacuum), moving things and picking up things.  Are you taking it pretty easy?  I've never had SPD before so I guess I'm not ready to take it easy, plus with DS it's so hard to do that....

[IwannaBanRN]

:) Thank you. It seems to be the only name my mom liked too, and she bugged me my entire pregnancy with DS1 to name him Tristan, so I was surprised that she liked Levi. lol

Originally Posted by TalkToMeNow 

Well, I love it, too. Good choice! 

[Ablemec]

Originally Posted by crazykittymomma 

The only thing that seems to help me is frequent chiro visits. :/

I've been doing chiro and PT, and neither seems to work.  I do have good days though, and there have been a few in a row lately, which is good, because I'd been nesting like crazy!