Can't get 28mo to nap w/o nursing (but I'm pregnant and just can't do it anymore)

[MamaTangerine]

I'm 35 weeks pregnant and have been nursing my 28mo throughout my pregnancy.  It's been fine until just about the past week or two.  Suddenly nursing is no longer painful but it feels WRONG wrong wrong.  Icky wrong.  I've read posts by other pregnant mamas who've mentioned how it made their skin crawl, and I can absolutely relate now.  

 

I usually nurse DD for a minute or two when she first wakes up in the morning.  I always nurse her for about a minute to say goodnight before DH takes her and puts her to sleep (he started doing this when we night-weaned her at the beginning of my pregnancy).  She doesn't ask much anymore during the day, so I pretty much only nurse if there's a major meltdown or a boo-boo.  The problem is that she is completely dependent on nursing to fall asleep for her nap.  I just can't do it anymore, though, without becoming a rage-filled, livid, terrible mother.  I don't even try anymore, so she hasn't napped in days, and it's making her demonic!  She's really overtired.  She sleeps around 11 hours per night, sometimes 12, and I just don't think that's enough for her.  Her naps were usually 2 hours.  She will not stay on the bed if I just try to lay next to her.  I've tried rocking her, but she won't tolerate that either.

 

I'm doubtful that anything will work to get her to nap, but I'm open to suggestions!  Has this sort of thing happened to anyone else at the end of their pregnancy?  I'm hopeful that once my milk comes back it will knock her out for naps once again.  Does nursing have the same tranquilizing effect on toddlers that it has on babies?  I sure hope so!  I miss my sweet, well-rested girl.  And I miss enjoying nursing her, too.  I'm definitely not ready to give it up.        

[Mom31]

Ugh Bless your heart. I went thru the skin crawl... I truly do wish I had weaned ... but alas I went on to nurse ds till 4 and dd till 2... It is what it is.

You can do it. :)   If you want to! If you don't you don't have to and your dd will be ok.

[MamaTangerine]

Thanks, Emilie.  I was just reading another post in the CLW forum about a mom who was having the same sort of aversion/anger towards her older nursling, and now I'm worried that the skin-crawling feeling will continue even after I give birth!  I really, really hope not.  If it does, though, then I certainly will allow myself to wean DD.  I'd rather wean her than be a crazed lunatic mama.  I'll sure miss naps, though!  Hopefully it's just some sort of napless phase she's going through and maybe eventually rocking will work for naptimes.    

[dancinganya]

My 2.5 year old daughter will sometimes fall asleep for a nap with a drive in the car and rarely in the stroller.  I did once take out the Ergo and walk her outside which also worked.  She will rock at night but refuses the rocker in the daytime.  She also prefers to nurse to sleep for naps but I've been trying to wean her of it.

Besides the habit of nursing to sleep, it could also be that she wants special time with you and nursing is that.  Maybe if you announced a routine special time with her where she decides what you do together for 10 minutes twice a day that would help give her that attention as your focus turns to the new baby?  I have read about this but haven't tried it myself though I think my daughter could use special time as we are gradually weaning her...

[MamaTangerine]

Thanks, dancinganya.  Yes, I'm sure as my belly gets bigger and I get more and more easily exhausted, DD is feeling more clingy.  She does have my undivided attention for much of the day.  We read a lot and role-play with her stuffed animals and do kitchen stuff together, but I should probably try to think up some new and exciting activities for her.  Messy art projects and sensory things like that.  Having a bunch of new activity kits is on my to-do list for when the baby arrives, but I think I'd better get cracking on that stuff now.         

I've resigned myself to the fact that unless she suddenly turns into one of those toddlers you hear about who just fall asleep while they're playing (ha, not mine!), she probably just won't nap for the next month until the baby comes and my milks returns.  DH is going to try to lay with her in her bed to get her to nap on the weekends, so hopefully that will work.  Two naps a week is better than none.  The only good thing about her not napping is that she falls asleep quickly at night - and early.