I'm glad he's back home!!!!!
We are not religious, I am not the sort to believe that it is my "duty" to obey. I just know that my husband can be stubborn. As I said before my usual tactic is to give him what he wants until he sees that he's wrong. What good does it do me to argue with him?
As far as DS going on days' notice, that bit was my decision. DH wanted to put him in for next school year, I told him I'd rather do it now. If he chooses to stay in PS he's got time to adjust BEFORE 1st grade, and if he chooses to come back home he's got more time to arrive at that decision before it starts to impact his attitude about school.
OK, but the only person that got hurt here was your son. He's the one that cried and got in trouble and went hungry and all of that. This has bigger stakes, because it's the little dude that's feeling the brunt of the decision.
DS has asked about school, and I describe to him, in great detail, what school is all about. Approximately 2 minutes into it, he says nope, he wants to stay homeschooling. Something about being gone ALL day long, not being around me or DH (if DH is working from home that day), and having to sit that still for that long, just really sucks the interest out of him! Now Kinder shouldn't be quite that much sitting, but I dunno...schools are changing, and I wouldn't be surprised if a school DID have kids sit for ages.
Kindergarten is SO different from the primary grades that I do not believe a child needs to go to Kindergarten in order to be ready for First Grade. I did Montessori from ages 4-6, then went right into public school for 1st. Some kids did Kinder at the elementary school we were all at. Others had NO Kindergarten at all, no school at all, just came in for 1st. And we all figured it out just fine. Not to mention, Kindergarten isn't even mandatory, at least in my state. So you didn't have to be doing *anything* with him school-wise, if you didn't really want to, if your state is like mine. (heck, in my state 8 is the mandatory education age, so my guy will be starting 3rd grade work by the time I send in my intent-to-homeschool to the district!) One day a week might have been absolutely perfect for him, to teach him what he needed to know this year...I know I wasn't doing all that much more for DS's year of K work, apart from just talking to him all the time, discussing money while at the grocery store, etc etc etc etc..it's amazing what they pick up just being around us.
I am very glad he's home now, but I really do recommend working on how you and DH come to decisions that will affect DS like this.