Weaning my 17 month old? (I'm pregnant)

[NewMom610]

DS nurses 2-3 times a day (he cut back on his own/refuses when I offer; this began around 9.5 months before I was pregnant - the kid loves solids) - before his nap, before bed, and sometimes once during the night.  However, I cannot do it any more.  It hurts so bad to nurse that I am putting off getting him down for naps and bed to avoid nursing.  Tears come to my eyes each time he latches on - it hurts and he tends to drag his teeth when he first starts nursing...and he has all of his teeth including his 2 year molars (at 17 months).

Unless we are in the car, it doesn't seem he can fall asleep without nursing.  I really need to remedy this.  I have no desire to tandem nurse (although I think it is wonderful some moms do), and he will be almost 22 months when baby #2 arrives.  I don't want to wean him too close to the baby's birth, because I don't want to have him associate weaning with his sibling.

I am pretty certain my supply is starting to drop (I'm 18 weeks pregnant), because sometimes he is getting frustrated and hitting my breast like he is trying to get more.  I was hoping he would wean himself when my supply finally decreased.

Any suggestions?  I would love to have him weaned by the end of January when he is 19 months (if I wasn't pregnant I would nurse him until age 2).  I am wondering if transitioning him to a toddler bed in his bedroom (he currently sleeps with us) would help, but I am really at a loss.  I want to do this as gently as possible with as few tears as possible.  The idea of hurting his feelings or causing him confusion breaks my heart, but honestly, at this point I don't know how I can continue nursing - the pain is becoming unbearable...and emotionally I feel like I want "my body back" for at least a few months before I start nursing baby #2.

Thanks for listening to my question/vent.

[jenniet]

With my first son, I weaned him to a bottle of breast milk and then eventually we went to goat's milk.  He never had a problem with the bottle though.  My second son never took a bottle so when I weaned him (bedtime was the toughest time), I had my husband put him to sleep for me.  My husband brought a sippy cup of breast milk for him into his room but my son never took more than a couple of sips.  Honestly, as much as he loved to nurse to sleep, after a few nights of my husband putting him to bed, he got over it.  He fussed a little but never even cried.  Good luck and congratulations on your pregnancy!  

[HappyMonkey]

Maybe you will be like me. At about 22 weeks pregnant I lost my milk completely. She still nursed but it was completely dry with no swallowing. Over the next few months her nursing almost disappeared. If I had attempted to wean then I think it would have been easy.. well easier anyhow. I didn't and when baby was born she went right up to normal nursing again (she was 20 months old). The first ten days were hell on earth as both babies wanted to nurse to sleep... often at the same time (many times a night). In the end I moved my now 22 month old into another bedroom with my husband. It was much harder on her than it would have been if we planned it when I could be part of night weaning.

I am glad she is still nursing, but I wish I had night weaned when I lost my milk. Elizabeth Pantley (No Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers) has a good program it seems, and so does Dr Sears.

Good luck!! It's great you are thinking about it now, and it will make it much easier on all of you to take care of it now.

Cheers,

Happy Monkey

[doulawoman]

i have no answers...my post is on nearly the same subject. dd is 20 mo and will be 23 mo when baby is born. because she is a horrid sleeper and we moved during this pregnancy i didn't wean...now no milk and she is just chewing...i think dr. jay gordon has great sggestions on gentle weaning....check him out. It didn;t work for us, dd has some toher sleep.reflux/sensory issues going on so...good luck!