Help me with these numbers...am I pregnant?

[McGucks]

I went off the pill in May.  Since then, my cycles have been the following lengths:  32 days, 31, 25, 28.  Well, today is 35 and no sign.  We use condoms and don't honestly have sex more than 4 or 5 times a month (yes, I know it only takes once!).

I am 41 and it has been suggested to me that I may have irregular-ish cycles due to peri-menopause?

Help...

[LionessMom]

it is really hard to tell unless you chart. either temps or cervical fluid. that is the only way to know when you ovulated and therefore when you should start af. it does sound like you have irregular cycles. if the condom stayed on correctly and it didnt break or slip or anything, you are most likely not pregnant. iwould check out the charting to avoid thread, buy yourself a basal thermometer and start charting. that way you know when to expect af and wont have to worry anymore.

[McGucks]

Thank you for writing back.  I think I may hit the Dollar Tree for an EPT today...

[LionessMom]

that is always a good idea. if your cycle was supposed to be 28 days then it would work by now. if it is negative then you prob o'ed later in the cycle. 

[McGucks]

Update: EPT negative.  I am both relieved and a bit disappointed.

[LionessMom]

i still highly reccomend charting :)

[McGucks]

I should chart, but honestly, the idea of it icks me out.  I really liked being on the pill because I never had to think about any of it or worry.  However, after 20-odd years of being on it, we felt like it might be a good idea for me to get off.

I took another EPT this morning (still negative), but today is day 37.  My skin is a mess, which could just be PMS.  Ug.

Thanks for writing back.  I wish I was comfortable enough with my body to do the whole CM/temp. thing.

Convince me that it's not yucky...I have some issues with body stuff that make that kind of thing possibly more aversive for me than the average bear...

[LionessMom]

at the very least all you would have to do is take your temp and chart that. that would tell you after you o'ed. nothing icky about that. and then you would know when to expect af. it always happens within 16 days or less of o. longer than that and you are preggo. but the before o can be different lengths of time. cm can be icky but it will be the only way to know before o. and personally i dont check inside. i only check what is on the tp when i wipe and that was fine for me. i dont touch it or anything. i just go by how it felt when i wiped and if i can see anything on the tp itself. you can check out a book on the billings method. great info about cm. he goes mostly by vaginal sensation. which is just how it feels when you are walking around. the temps are for verifying that it did happen. most of the books i read on these methods checked it just by wiping. if you feel dry then you are not fertile. if you feel wet as in you are ready to go then you are fertile. 

i really liked learning all this stuff about my body. it made me appreciate it more. i used to be very uncomfortable with my body and all the stuff that goes on inside it. but now that i know how it all works i feel more confident. i am not sure what your issue is, but i hope you find some peace with it. you always just start with one book. the most reccomended one is "taking charge of your fertility". but there are lots others too.

[JMJ]

I would second the idea of at least temping.  Usually the number of days of high temp before AF is about the same, and you can know when you ovulated.  With temping, you can just take your temp in your mouth just like you would any other time, just with a basal thermometer.  You don't have to do anything disgusting if you don't want to.  Many women find that charting helps them develop a better relationship with their bodies and their cycles.

[Adaline'sMama]

Just as a side note, the dollar store ept showed me negative until I was 19 DPO. An Answer test from Walgreens told me i had a BFP at 9 DPO.