Recommended books for parenting girls?

[jnh896]

DD is almost five and I've just realized that my parenting library is filled with books about infants, toddlers and preschoolers and the recommendations just aren't fitting what I need.  (Or I can't figure out how to translate them to her current age and development stage.)

For example, she has recently really starting to mimic me or be intrigued by older girls.  She wants to dress up in my clothes, wear makeup, get her ears pierced, wear what other girls wear etc.  We tried very consciously throughout her childhood so far to be fairly gender neutral   (i.e. we didn't have just pink stuff, she had cars, trucks, dinosaurs, etc. in addition to dolls, she wore dresses and pants, etc..)  So seeing this "gender identification" emerge has really been fascinating to me.  And I want to do my best to ensure that she develops healthy self-esteem and respect for her uniqueness a girl.

With makeup for example - how do you explain what it is and why you wear it without mistakenly teaching them a lesson that they *need* it to be pretty?  I am very sensitive to unknowingly saying or doing something that teaches her that girls are only valued for their looks. 

And also with the emerging peer influence - how can I help her manage that and learn to make her own decisions and pick what she likes - not just want "they" say she should be and do.

Any thoughts or reading suggestions?

Thanks!

[poetlizabeth]

Here are a few books that may be helpful:

A parenting book about raising girls from the American girl doll company (I know the company has gone overboard with expensive products and commercialism but it started out as a great small company and the mission was to per serve childhood.This book looks good and has great reviews!

http://store.americangirl.com/agshop/html/item/id/165300/uid/659

The Hurried Child- This is looks like a very interesting book and highly recommended by the Natural Child Project

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0201073978/ncp-20

Cinderella ate my daughter

http://www.amazon.com/Cinderella-Ate-Daughter-Dispatches-Girlie-Girl/dp/0061711527

Even if your daughter is not into the whole Disney princess craze this is an a good read and thought provoking.

Hope this helps!!