At our latest well-child visit (two days ago), the Dr. mentioned that DD (19 months) has fused labia minora. She said that I need to gently apply a cream (like vaseline or something safe for the diaper area) and traction them apart. That seemed odd to me, so I asked specifically if I should just leave it be, similarly to not retracting an intact penis. She said, no, it's important to open the labia, and if I can't get them open and keep them open, she would have to refer to a urologist for further intervention. She said there will likely be some minor bleeding and pain, which just seemed a bit off to me. So, I didn't follow my intuition and do more research on the matter. Instead, today, I followed her advice, and tried to gently separate them. DD was obviously uncomfortable, and didn't like it *at all*. A few hours later, she began crying inconsolably, communicating that her bottom was hurting. I looked at her, and her labia are quite red and painful-looking. I applied calendula cream, which seemed to ease the discomfort. I am very unhappy with myself; I regret ever messing with her girl parts, and wish I'd just followed my intuition on the whole thing.
I've been doing some research on the topic, and am coming up with some conflicting advice. Some say to leave it alone, that labial adhesions will generally self-correct, others say to use an estrogen cream, others say to gently traction it open. If you have experience with this, how did you resolve it?