(((hug))) Litmama. That sounds just grueling. My heart goes out to you. I am grateful your dh is so very supportive. It does sound like you found really knowledgable people--thank goodness. Wow about those betas. 2362!!! That is so confusing. Have you asked anyone if your tube is in danger if they can't see anything there? I understand and support waiting as long as you can until you feel at peace as long as it is safe. I have been there. I will keep thinking of you.
Warm Winter Wishes and BFP's 40 ++ TTC - Page 9
Litmama, I'm so sorry you haven't had better news. As you said, it has been grueling, and just a horrible unsettled time for you. I do hope your little one is hiding, and will reveal him/herself to you soon. Your Beta sounds high, so there must be a baby in there somewhere.
((hugs)) for this difficult time.
Waturmama, I do recall that article. It is amazing and beautiful that our babies give us so much. Although I have difficulty accepting that I can't have my baby(ies) earthside, I do not for a moment regret the pregnancies. I had 9 - 10 weeks of hoping, dreaming, looking forward, and feeling joyful (though quite anxious at times). To me, that is better than nothing at all.
I'm 10 dpo and already my temperature has dropped. I'd love to think of it as an implantation dip, but I feel it is unlikely, and I usually have a reasonable instinct for when I am pregnant.
We went out last night to celebrate new year's eve with friends, but I found it hard to relax and enjoy myself. I feel there's a part of me missing, and don't quite know how to mend it. I had a couple of drinks (alcoholic) because I'm tired of not drinking "just in case", maybe I'm starting to let go of this desire, though it doesn't much feel like it, LOL.
Waturmama, where are you at with your cycle? When will you see the RE?I'd love to hear what he/she has to say.
Happy New Year everyone. May this be the year we get beautiful BFP's, healthy pregnancies and beautiful babies...
Hi Ladies / Mamas / Mamas to be:
I woke up today on New Years Day thinking about you, and decided to drop by to say hello and wish everyone much health and happiness in 2012. I'm glad to see that some of you have achieved your pregnancy goals. Congrats Saoirse! I'm so excited for you.
As for me, I'm 47 (closing in on 48). I've moved on from ttc but still have frozen embryos. I'm hanging on to them for another 8-12 months (in case I meet some awesome guy who wants to start a family), but will likely donate them to someone by 2013. If you might be interested, let me know. I'd ask for storage and shipping fees, but nothing else. Egg and sperm donors both have dark hair / features. Egg donor is known and very sweet, slim, med height...great young woman. Sperm donor is from a bank, but has awesome qualities.
On a personal / professional note, I've just started dating a guy who seems great (Gary), but only time will tell. As for work, I'm a representative for LegalShield (legal plan and identity theft protection). As you all navigate life and fertility things, if you need a new Will, or an attorney to help with every day issues (contract review, letter writing, or just consultation on a million things), drop me a line (PM) and I'd be happy to give you more details. It's incredibly affordable ($17/month for the legal plan), and we only use quality law firms (US and Canada). You and your family have access throughout North America. Ok, enough of a plug. You can check it out at: www.legalshield.com, but if you want to buy it, please PM me so that the sale is attributed to me. (I don't want to post my name here for the whole world to see).
Thanks, and many blessings and fertility wishes to you all!
Thanks again to everyone for the loving support!
MsGoodBuns, nice to see you again! It sounds like things are working out really well for you... congrats on the job and the romantic interest! Please keep us posted.
Gumblossom, I really hear you on the feeling of being tired of "behaving"! I'm glad you got to kick up your heels a little bit. I believe it's good for the soul once in a while. I also know what you mean about having trouble engaging... I often feel that way, especially when I'm with not-so-close friends who don't know I'm TTC. I often don't even know how to answer the question, "How have you been?". ((( hugs ))) to you! I'm hoping that dip was indeed an implantation dip (in which case you wouldn't feel any symptoms yet, right?). For the record, I had zero symptoms before my 12dpo BFP and didn't develop any until about 16dpo.
WaturMama, you asked about whether I was in danger if a tubal pg was too small to see... in theory, the answer is yes. But all my docs (I've consulted about 6 of them now) all seem to be in agreement that since I'm asymptomatic it's safe to wait it out a bit longer. I was really nervous about this yesterday, but have relaxed about it now and am trusting my body, which feels pregnant and healthy and not in any pain or discomfort (except for a few hours of nausea today, but yay for that!).
We had a bit of good news this evening... my betas doubled! The doc I spoke to yesterday said if that happened, that would be "wonderful news" that would suggest a viable pregnancy, not an ectopic. We haven't seen or spoken to a doc yet about this today (waiting for a call this evening), so have no medical interpretation of the numbers (I just called and got them from the lab). I also did more sleuthing and found a medical journal article stating that the Hcg threshold for being able to see a gestational sac is actually 2,500-3,500, and at my last u/s I hadn't crossed that threshold yet.
Tomorrow we're scheduled for an u/s with the RE that I'm disliking more and more (the one who wanted to rush me into a D&C and methotrexate when my 5-week u/s showed nothing -- I understand he was thinking of my safety -- it was really his dismissive, patronizing manner that disturbed me). I'm upset that I can't seem to get away from this guy -- I've asked if I can be followed by OB/Gyn rather than RE but the wheels turn slowly at my hospital and I'm still considered an RE patient for the moment. BUT this time DH is coming with me for support, and we also may end up canceling it, depending on how our phone call with a doc tonight goes. I'm hoping we can move now into "expectant management" (since my betas look good and I have no ectopic symptoms) and just do more betas until Thursday, when my original 6.5 week u/s was scheduled for.
Hope you've all had a lovely relaxing New Year's Day! I have a good feeling for all of us for 2012.
Congratulations, Purplefish!!! That is so wonderful.
I'd love to hear whatever you'd like to tell about the happy news. Enjoy your babymoon!
MsGoodBuns!!! (((hug))) So good to "see" you. Sending great relationship wishes! And wishing you peace and joy in the choices about the embryos.
Gumblossom, I don't know exactly where I am in my cycle. I was sick through the middle of it, so my temps weren't good. I did have ewcm though, so I have some clues. I think I'm either 12 dpo or 14 dpo. I have some pg symptoms, but my dh cannot smell hormones on my breath and that seems to be one of the most reliable ones, so I'm not too hopeful about this round. My appt with the RE is Thursday. I will definitely report in.
Litmama, yay doubling betas!! That seems so good. I am crossing everything I can for you (fingers, toes, arms, legs, hair)
I wore our goddess last night as I watched beautiful fireworks for the new year over the San Francisco Bay. I envisioned her bringing fertility, joy, and babies to our group in 2012. Happy new year dear women!
Hi ladies, I am totally crashing your thread but I wanted to share something I read in one of our local papers this morning. The first New Year baby born in Baton Rouge was a baby girl her Mom is 46. She beat out a baby boy born one minute later to a 43 year old first time Mom! http://theadvocate.com/home/1699533-125/girl-no.-1-in-2012
Wow, what a great story about the first-time 40something moms! Thank you for sharing!
WaturMama, I love the image of you wearing the goddess while watching fireworks, what a great start to this new year. I'm hopeful for you that you're feeling some symptoms -- crossing everything for you, too! It's so sweet and quirky that your DH can smell Hcg on your breath... I asked my DH if he could smell it on mine and even though he has a very sensitive sniffer, he said no. I think your DH is especially talented! Looking forward to hearing how your RE appointment goes.
Spoke to an Ob/Gyn last night about my results, so got some context. It all sounds good -- she said that my betas (now well over 4,000) are suggestive of a viable pregnancy, and that there's new evidence that there's much greater variance than previously thought about when a gestational sac should be seen. I also asked her about my very retroverted uterus, and she said that pregnancies are often seen quite a bit later in women with tilted uteruses. Vindication! I had asked my RE about this and he laughed it off. So I took the plunge and canceled my sono with my RE that was scheduled for today -- will try looking again later in the week for my babe. Still no ectopic symptoms, just feeling normal healthy pregnancy stuff.
If this does end up being a viable pregnancy, I'm definitely going to write up a post about the potential pitfalls of early ultrasounds so other women in my situation can know they're not alone and have choices when their Dr.s are recommending immediate surgery/shots!
Enjoy your day, all...
I'm teary from Litmama's news, too. That is great news. It sounds like you have been through a lot of needless stress this week. Bleah on that, but it has led you to a great OB/GYN, it sounds like, so that is a good silver lining. Awesome that she spoke to you last night. And I love 4000+!!!! I'm glad you cancelled the RE appt. You don't need more stress from him. You just take care of your dear pregnant self and I am sending some grow-baby-grow vibes across the Bay.
I love that Simonsez2U. Thank you for stopping by and sharing it! It just spreads the hope so many ways--for the first time mamas (the 43 year-old is a first time mama) and for those of us with a gap (there is a 17-year gap between the 46 year-old's new baby and her next youngest child). Hopeful for 2012!
Litmama, I am SO, SO happy that you have received this recent positive news! You have been through so much uncertainty, but one thing for certain, that beta is awesome! And yay for having nausea! I have been on pins and needles these last few days, following your story... I thought of you the other day when we were shopping in a children's store for a coat for my little guy-- the woman that worked there was so nice, and we stayed for awhile after the store closed talking about pregnancy and children... and she shared with me that her second child had was a miracle. Turns out that she became pregnant with twins (but didn't know it; just assumed it was a singleton)... sadly one of them did not make it in the early weeks... they did an u/s and declared her miscarriage 'complete'. Well, 6 months later, she learns that she is still pregnant with the one baby... she was really worried because she had drank alcohol on a few occasions during that period, but everything was just fine. And today her little miracle girl is 4 years old and she is a complete joy. Her first name is Autumn (because they conceived during that season) and though I forget her 2nd middle name, her 3rd middle name is Lotus. She told me the significance of the meaning-- I can't recall exactly, but I was really touched by what she told me.
Tonight, I'm overjoyed and teary from reading your update.
Holy cow, LitMama -- what a roller coaster! Sending you MANY positive baby vibes.
Me -- I have about 2 months left in my pregnancy (due date March 6), baby is kicking and leaping like a champ ALL the time, everything proceeding normally. I painted a dresser today for the two of us since we'll be in the same room for a while.
I also recently worked out a wonderful job situation -- I am not only getting a raise but will be able to 100% telecommute (aside from meetings/library research), make my own schedule, and switch 100% over to the part of my job I like the most (where I have almost total autonomy). The job will continue to be part-time with benefits (a miracle in itself). My 3-month maternity leave will also be paid at the higher rate. And my sig other will be able to take the summer off and handle at least half the baby care when I go back to work in June. I will still have to do some sort of PT child care in the fall when he goes back to work but it looks like I can maybe be more flexible with that than I was originally expecting.
(for those of you new here -- I'm 44, conceived naturally and almost instantly at 43 after having tubes flushed out/uterine polyp removed. 2nd kid, first one is almost 9.)
I still sort of can't believe it -- it's almost too much. I couldn't ask for a better work situation (other than a yearlong paid leave, of course! but not available in the USA...). My good fortune in the past year has been extraordinary and I am very grateful. I wish you all the same for 2012!
Oh Litmama....you are so on my mind! I am cheering for you & your little bean. Sticky thoughts.
Watermama~the godess & the fireworks, I can see it now. Lovely!
Fuller2~good for you!! We should all be so blessed!! Thank you for sharing!
Simonsez2u~ great article!
Stevi~ get busy girl!!!
And, does anyone have an opinion on how many days DPO you can test? (how early I mean) I can't tell if its the progesterone that is making me feel this way OR somebean else......
Fuller2, great to hear from you! Wow, I'm so glad to hear how beautifully things are working out for you - yay! Your job situation sounds ideal, and you sound so peaceful and exuberant all at once. Is your 9-yo excited?
Oh, gosh, thank you all so so much for the cheering-on and the thoughts and wishes! I'm touched.
I had to log on, though, to tell you I'm not sure if there will be a happy ending after all... this evening I started having some tiny intermittent pains in my left ovary-ish area (the side I ovulated on, so presumably if there were a tubal pg it would be on the left side) as well as in my rectum. It's like very mild ovulation pains. Although my doctor told me not to worry about mild, intermittent pains (only strong, persistent pains), I can't help but. I just keep imagining this could be the teeny tiny beginning of it. (and of course I had to go online and read all sorts of scary stories about ectopics).
I also had kind of a downer day because when I canceled my AM u/s with the RE I dislike, he scolded me and gave me a very grim interpretation of my situation. So, his perspective sort of eroded my good cheer and cast doubt over everything. One of the hardest things about this is the wildly differing opinions of the various docs - I want to hitch my wagon to a star and believe the encouraging docs, but I also worry about my well-being. So, while I was originally planning to wait until Thursday for my 6.5 week u/s, these tiny pains have me panicked enough to want to get one ASAP tomorrow morning. To make matters more complex, I'm "breaking up" with my RE and getting the u/s from an Ob/Gyn, so the politics and logistics are a little bit difficult.
Sigh... we'll see what tomorrow brings. My dear, dear DH is taking excellent emotional and physical care of me and has completely taken over running of the household and is doing all the cooking and cleaning and life-administration while I rest. Whatever happens, I'm grateful for having conceived and nurtured this babe and for having such a dear sweet family. And for having all of you!
Skeemama, I don't usually test before 12dpo, but I know some mamas test earlier. I've tried testing earlier, but have not had any luck with that. I got my BFP for this pregnancy at 12dpo but it was really light. My beta the next day was 17, so I'm guessing it was 10 or less the day prior. I had used two different brands of internet cheapies... the wondfo caught my BFP at 12dpo and was light but visible, and the early-pregnancy-tests one (that was supposed to detect 10miu) just had a ghost line that looked like an evap. The early-preg-tests actually never got convincingly dark until my Hcg was over 100. And I didn't get a positive FRER until I was 14dpo, when my beta was about 79. I also tested using an OPK and it was positive starting at 12dpo.
Also, re: symptoms... I had none! Breast tenderness/enlargement, fatigue, frequent urination showed up well after my BFP, and nausea didn't kick in until 6 weeks. But I know some women have symptoms much earlier than that.
Fingers crossed for you!