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What do you feel are "reasonable" costs? - Page 2

post #21 of 57

crunchy i know u started a fun thread... but it certainly generates food for thought doesnt it?


btw OT my midback length hair is now short and in steps cut by my 9 year old with me helping a little bit. she did a really great job :) i cut her almost to her butt hair to her earlobe length in one shot. so yeah we are an adventerous family where hair is concerned. 


it is really hard isnt it to come up with a philosophy that you feel all right about. it takes a long time to come to where you feel you are ok.


so here are some of the things i do. lets take clothes for example. i consume v. v. v. little. instead of 7 shirts and 2 pants, i have 15 shirts and 10 pants. i have variety and dont look like i wear the same clothes all the time AND my clothes last me longer than if i was rotating very often (though whether you have 3 shirts or 5 shirts rotation, the time taken is the same - personally i just prefer lots of variety). 99% of my clothing is from thrift stores or hand me downs. however whenever i have a few $$$s i buy something i like to support someone. since i particularly like hand made stuff i might spend some money on a hand made blouse. that money i collect over time from somewhere i scrimped. for instance instead of say choosing to add another ingredient to my soup i save the money. instead of buying a drink i am dying for i drink water. now that similar blouse might be ten times cheaper from a chain store, but that's not the point. i get it either directly from the person or from a store i know who takes 20% of every dollar and returns it in the many communities that it gets its products from.  if i ever get a cup of coffee i go to local small ones. i wear more skirts than pants coz i find it easier finding 'fair' skirts than pants. 


we go for childrens plays because the cost of the ticket is 5 bucks each as opposed to 20 to 30 bucks. but once in a blue moon we do go for the 20 bucks ones. when i go for movies i go to the local theater - not the chain. 


in other words my world is - robbing peter to pay paul. 

post #22 of 57
Thread Starter 
That's an interesting philosophy, meemee, and I guess that's kind of what we've been doing recently. When we have the money & it's "worth it" to us, I do spend a bit more to support someone local or something. Maybe I just want to do that more often. It's hard to even do that though, because I've always had such a save-save-save-scrimp-scrimp-scrimp mentality!!
post #23 of 57

Awesome! I cut our hair also, and you do get better w/ practice :D


As for other things, we're semi minimalists, so we rotate our clothes and donate them or repurpose then for blankets, decorations or to fit the babe, who actually has the most clothes. Anyway! So when we buy things, it's what we want, we never settle.


Tee shirt: 10-15$

jeans: 30$ (sale)

Shoes: 40$

Socks: 5$

underwear: 5$

hair: free :D

massage: free (we massage each other, practice)

Nails: free (I do everyone's nails)

Kids class: $20 (that's what we pay for 2 hrs)

Toy: 10-25$ (wooden/ natural)

book: 5-10$ (amazon)

night out: $$$ (doesn't matter, usually $10/ person)

groceries: "        "


post #24 of 57

A shirt (everyday clothes, nothing special)- $0- $20
Pants- $0- $30
Shoes- $0-$50
A haircut- I don't pay to get my hair cut or dd's hair cut. Dh pays $10 and feels that is reasonable.
A massage- no idea as I've never done this
Nails or pedicure- no idea as I've never done this
A 1-hour class for your kid (music/dance/art/yoga/karate/etc.)- no idea as I've never done this
A toy- $0-$50
A monthly night out with friends or your spouse- $0- $30 We don't go out or just do low cost things.


I do try to get a good price on stuff but also do not spend on non-essentials often so sometimes will spend a bit more if it looks like a better choice.

post #25 of 57

I really think that all these things depend on many, many factors so it's difficult to put a price on things. Shoes, for example, I might get a cute pair of dress shoes for $5 on clearance then spend $100 on another pair a few months later. 

A shirt (everyday clothes, nothing special) - $20, maybe $10 for something inexpensive on sale or $40 for a nice one
Pants - $50 per pair
Shoes - $75 for a decent, comfortable, everyday type pair that will last a couple years
A haircut - I pay $40-45, including the tip, but I only have my hair cut once every year or two
A massage - I consider a massage a huge luxury and something I only do when I have a physical need or I'm given a certificate for one as a gift; I would say $1 per minute plus a 10-20% tip if they do a good job
Nails or pedicure - I've only ever had my nails done a couple times and it was when I was in high school and early on in college but if I had to say what's a fair price I might say $20 but that could be way off
A 1-hour class for your kid (music/dance/art/yoga/karate/etc.) - totally depends on what it is, there's no reasonable amount that applies to all these; our kids have done soccer and it worked out to about $2/hour and they've done suzuki violin that worked out to $40-something per hour plus the cost of the violin
A toy - again, depends on the toy, we have some great made-by-me felt play food that cost pennies and we have dolls that cost $150 each, they're both played with plenty; I would say that it's reasonable to pay $15 for a made in china plastic toy from target but it's also reasonable to pay $40 for an average natural made in usa toy
A monthly night out with friends or your spouse - this is a rare treat because of the cost of babysitting but maybe $10-20 for an inexpensive outing with friends while DH is home with the kids all the way up to $150 for a nice dinner out with DH, including babysitting (we are not willing to scrimp on babysitting, a good babysitter is worth a minimum of $15/hour when we're out and we usually pay more like $20)

post #26 of 57
Originally Posted by crunchy_mommy View Post

 It's hard to even do that though, because I've always had such a save-save-save-scrimp-scrimp-scrimp mentality!!

thanks to my parents and my marriage breaking down i have been able to get out of that. i saw what it did - how it can change things. in a way i am grateful to my parents coz they taught me the magic of childhood which i now share with dd. my dad made good money but we lived frugally - too frugally sometimes. we spent sometimes but we gave up family fun time (saving pennies) to build the savings account. my parents got so used to saving that when time came to spend in their retirement they couldnt. mind you we were by no means poor ever. but we never spent even close to what my dad earned. i swear he saved 50% of his salary. before he could enjoy his money dad died of cancer. adn then the taking care of financial burden fell on my mom. its kinda an albatross round her neck. and her spending urge is GONE. she rarely buys anything for herself. mostly while she enjoyed financial freedom when young she enjoyed money by buying things for family and friends. now family is thousands of miles away and no money can cover the loss of that. 


and so they taught me how to invest in now which i do with dd. forget savings for future (when i had the opportunity i did that - now forget it). sometimes i have to spread a few dollars over days. its during those times if i can spend on something frivolous then i consider it a feat. i have lost too many good times with dd (u dont spend your last $$s coz those are ur last $$$s and then you find some in ur pocket that will help you get thru till your next check) to not grab the chance when i get it.


that's why its important not to focus only on the monetary worth of the item or service. it may not be financially wise decision but it might be a huge life changing things (and hugeness comes in small packages so its only in retrospect do you realise how huge it was). i have a friend who is a single mom who came across some money she wanted to use with travel. she felt it was irresponsible and instead put it in an investment. she regrets her decision pitifully lately as life has been pulling her down and she is unable to have her usual deal with it attitude. instead it drives her batty.


i tell you there is something to living in constant fear. i've noticed it actually makes me sick. and actually sometimes buying that hand made blouse makes me feel 'rich'. not living in that fear mode. however also i find its easier to do all that as a single mom rather than with a partner. to have a partner be on teh same page as you is huge. ex and i were poles apart. however he taught me how to value things. his reasoning was if you really, really really want it you should get it. i always remember that. 


post #27 of 57

What a neat question!

Originally Posted by crunchy_mommy View Post

I am just curious on the variation in what people consider "reasonable" costs for items & services -- the cost that you would pay and feel like the majority of people would be able to pay.
For ex., what would a reasonable cost be for:
A shirt (everyday clothes, nothing special) *15 dollars for work*; 8 dollars for home, 25-30 for an interview or special occasion.
Pants - 25 dollars in a pinch, 15 dollars is a deal
Shoes - 50-75 dollars for sneakers, 15 for sandals, 30 for dress shoes
A haircut-30 dollars
A massage - don't get
Nails or pedicure - dont get
A 1-hour class for your kid (music/dance/art/yoga/karate/etc.) - don't get
A toy - 10 -15 bucks every few months (not including gifts from others)
A monthly night out with friends or your spouse -40 -50 dollars; including food etcs. We don't drink, but this includes treating another couple
Feel free to add other items... Answer with the assumption that you'd spend money on those things, even though I know some people, myself included, don't actually spend on some of those!


I love this! I do feel sometimes people who have less than us, spend quite a bit more than us. And I'm sure the opposite is true as well.  It's like living in a different reality when people talk about different levels of spending. This thread is enlightening!

post #28 of 57

A shirt (everyday clothes, nothing special) $10 for home/casual, $20 for work, $40 for a special occasion
Pants - $15-20, more for a decent pair of jeans ($50+)
Shoes - up to $20 for thongs or scuffs, $50-$100 for a decent pair of work shoes or joggers
A haircut - I cut DPs, and wish, WISH I could cut my own (I started out as a hairdresser many years ago)  I don't have that forgiving type hair.  So maybe $40, twice a year.  I do my own fringe.
A massage - only get on rare occasions.  $60 for an hour
Nails or pedicure - Don't have this done.
A toy - we only buy for friend's children, so it depends.  Probably spend more than we should. Maybe $50?
A monthly night out with friends or your spouse - $100 would be a reasonable amount for both of us.  We are more likely to stay in though. 

post #29 of 57

For ex., what would a reasonable cost be for:
A shirt (everyday clothes, nothing special)    $9-$15
Pants   $30
Shoes  $100 (I buy expensive shoes)
A haircut   $50
A massage  $99 but always have a 1/2 price groupon and get massages about once every ten years!
Nails or pedicure
A 1-hour class for your kid (music/dance/art/yoga/karate/etc.)  $25
A toy  all over the place
A monthly night out with friends or your spouse  $100


post #30 of 57



I love the discussion about handmade clothes.  I just wanted to add (since my post made it sound like I spend signifiantly less than everyone else here) that I get nice things.  One of the reasons I love my thrift store and consignment shop is that they tend to have wonderful clothes, clothes that I could never afford if I were buying new.  And most of them have been worn once or even have their tags still on.  And they really do last longer than the "cheap" clothes I could actually afford at the regular store.  Another thing I'm starting to learn is how to sew, which is more expensive than just buying clothes, but I agree there's something special about handmade clothes (although in my case they're still a different kind of special -- kind of funky looking as I figure this whole thing out!).  I like wearing a pretty particular style and color pallate of skirt for religious reasons, and it can be hard to find them.  It'd be nice to just be able to whip one up!  The other option is there are a lot of internet seamstresses that sell plain/modest Christian clothing, and I'd love to support them, but at this point I just can't afford it... even though those clothes last pretty much forever I'm told.


Here's a quote I often go back to as I struggle with my new sewing machine:


"That needle poking to and fro, Means so much more than you may know. Each snap, each button, each shirt, each dress, contains something you'll never guess. Each garment Mom makes, from the start, contains a small piece of her heart. With every snip she adds her love, and whispers a prayer to God above. Dear Father, bless the one who wears this, protect and guide them with Your kindness. Give them strength from day to day. That from all sin they'll turn away. Then into each and every seam. She presses in her fondest dream. That each one in her family. Will join her in eternity. So next time Mom makes you any clothes, Know that, in it, her love shows. It's more than just a thing to wear, It's a symbol of Mom's loving care."

from "Sew Fast and Sew Easy" author wishes to be unnamed


I think it gets the point accross even when it's not Mom, and even if you aren't religious.  There's a meaning to handmade clothes!




post #31 of 57

A shirt (everyday clothes, nothing special): I love Nordstroms!  I have gotten great deals on shirts for work maybe  9 to 15 bucks!
Pants: I shop around so 10 to 35 at the most.  If it's jeans I'll spend a little more since my jeans live with me for life!
Shoes: I shop for shoes when they have the good deals.  So 15 to 30 is a good average if it's buy one get one half off.
A haircut: 10, I won't spend more.  I once spent 180 on a high end haircut that looked like I let my kid do it with toddler scissors! 
A massage: In my area you can get 30 dollar deals at good salons.  Theres a lot of them so you could get that deal practically weekly if you move around.  I don't get them though. 
Nails or pedicure: Won't spend money on that
A 1-hour class for your kid (music/dance/art/yoga/karate/etc.): Maybe 10 for a drop in class but we're not going to anything seriously right now.
A toy: Toys get bought on holidays only.  And if it's a reasonable request it's yours.  20 limit
A monthly night out with friends or your spouse: We don't do this.  We're lame

post #32 of 57

I do most of our shopping at thrift stores

Shirts- $3-6




Shoes- $3-20


Night out- free( I am dating someone and he takes care of that)  but I think he usually spends about $150- $200 he likes fancy dinners


Night out with kids- $30- $14 for 2 hours of fun at Extreme sports kid fun place their favo thing to do!!!


Mani Pedi- I get one in the summer as a big splurge and I think I pay around 40-50 for it.... but I get  french tips( I think that's what its called)


massage- $40/hr- I live in chronic pain so do this a few times when things get bad

Tho my new boyfriend has a massage table so I think it will become free soon he has offered.


hair cut- 12. I have long long hair and my friend is a licensed cosmetologist and she does it out of her home and charges everyone @12. Its great and

she lives down the street- tho I only get it done every few weeks.





post #33 of 57

A shirt (everyday clothes, nothing special) $10
Pants $20
Shoes $15 (sneakers) $30 (dress shoes)
A haircut $15
A massage $100 although I'm sure I'll never get one!
Nails or pedicure $30 for both
A 1-hour class for your kid (music/dance/art/yoga/karate/etc.) $5 reasonably but they cost like $35 by me so we don't do them :(
A toy $15+ but we buy quality not quantity so they will last for multiple children
A monthly night out with friends or your spouse $40

post #34 of 57

i have a question for you guys about toys as i was just glancing at the toys list.


do the toys get more expensive as the kids grow older?


or do u think its a personality thing that a particular kid likes.


my dd is 9. the kind of toys i'd like to get her are all over 50 bucks. adn rarely found at thrift stores. so she doesnt really get toys but i get her little treats for her hobby which i can afford at garage sales like knives and aprons and kitchenware. she does use a lot of untoy things as toys.


you can only get so many books.

post #35 of 57

A shirt (everyday clothes, nothing special)-$25
Pants-$30-100 depending (If you can find good jeans that fit it's worth the price in my opinion)
Shoes-$30-100 (good running sneaks are worth it too)
A haircut-$40 (I tell them not to blow dry/style if I am just going home.  Saves money)
A massage-$80/hr
Nails or pedicure-$25/30
A 1-hour class for your kid (music/dance/art/yoga/karate/etc.)- around$17
A toy-depends
A monthly night out with friends or your spouse-$150 for sitter, dinner, and dessert/drinks somewhere else

post #36 of 57

A shirt (everyday clothes, nothing special) - 50 cents to $5
Pants $20 (i have a really big butt)
Shoes $100 - prone to plantar fasciitis and shin splints. i buy klogs and asics.
A haircut - 20-30
A massage $0
Nails or pedicure $0
A 1-hour class for your kid (music/dance/art/yoga/karate/etc.) depends on the type of class, and my child's interest. anywhere from $5 to $15
A toy well... we spend up to $150 on huge lego sets so....
A monthly night out with friends or your spouse $0 these days. i suspect $40 is ok.

post #37 of 57

I like finding quality products because I know some things are an investment and I will be spending less in the long run if I pay more up front. Example: jeans for me. I have long legs and really like jeans that fit my body well and are comfortable, so I will spend $100 on a pair of jeans, I think $50 would be deemed reasonable and quality will be better than most, but some of my favorite brands are closer to $100 so I will spend that..


A shirt - $15-$25 for a good shirt, if it's a basic no-frills tee, then $5 (like at kohls).

Pants - $50

Shoes - $40

A Haircut - $30

A massage - $45

Nails/Pedi - $35 for both

1-hour class - $20

A Toy - this really depends on the toy. I like high-quality non mass-marketed plastic junk (like fischer price). I like the handmade wooden toys off etsy stores, so I would say maybe $20?

Monthly night out - we prefer not to spend more than $50 on date night.

post #38 of 57
Even before I moved to an area that has lots of good second hand stores, it was a contest between me and my sister to see who could get the best deals. I do not buy anything new that I don't have to. I try to only buy the color tag that is half off at second hand stores! I guess years of competing with my sister and our motto being "never pay retail" made me simply hate to pay what the sticker says :)  When we do buy new, my husband swears I can smell the clearance stickers - I will randomly turn down aisles because I can spot that red sticker at the very end
A shirt (everyday clothes, nothing special) $1-5
Pants $5
Shoes $2-10 (I have had great luck with second hand shoes for adults even)
A haircut - I have paid for a haircut 2 times in 31 years. I cut hair but we all haven't cut in years. IF I had to - $40?
A massage - 25 - I used to go to the school occasionally - that's it
Nails or pedicure - $15/$25 I think is the last I paid (before tip) but that was years ago
A 1-hour class for your kid (music/dance/art/yoga/karate/etc.) $10
A toy - $5 (second hand)
A monthly night out with friends or your spouse - self $25, date night $50


post #39 of 57

I find a lot of good old fashioned wooden toys at thrift stores! But my DD is 2 y/o so...

post #40 of 57

A shirt (everyday clothes, nothing special) Free or .50  I go to thrift that routinely has all clothing items for .50 and try not to buy anywhere but there
Pants--see above
Shoes--$20-50 or more I buy myself good shoes as I wear forever kids less so especially growing feet!
A haircut--I do ours
A massage--wouldn't ever get one
Nails or pedicure--I MISS getting my nails done. I used to pay $35 every 3 weeks and I loved it, but it felt like a ridulous waste of money so I don't any more
A 1-hour class for your kid (music/dance/art/yoga/karate/etc.) Try to do free, but would pay whatever if it was something they had really been wanting to explore
A toy Try free, but depends on item and play value. Might spend $20-50 if it was something they'd use a lot and it would last
A monthly night out with friends or your spouse  $20-40


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