how do you know your kid needs help?

[sadie_sabot]

(apologies if this is actually supposed to be elsewhere: mods, do your thing as needed!!)

So, I have a 9yo dd and I *know* that moodiness and drama are not unexpected at this age.  Right now she 'hates her life" and especially hates school and i just miserable,, and I haven't been able to unearth anything terrible that is contributing to this; 4th grade is definitely harder than 3rd but so much so that nothing in life is good anymore and life's not worth living anymore?

She's definitely starting puberty, which i know comes with some hard knocks but i also want her to get through puberty relatively unscathed and am not averse to a bit of professional support if it would help (and if our insurance would cover it...i *think* it would).  she's also significantly yonger than most of her friends and has a bit of social struggle as a result.

I'm torn between thinking this is serious business and I should get her to a mental health professional STAT and thinking it's normal preadolescent girl behavior.  How do you know the difference?  Obviously if she hurts herself that's a clear sign but if we're headed in that direction I'd rather not wait.

Is there, like, a checklist somewhere or something???

[TiredX2]

I don't have a checklist.

What I do have is a DD who we decided to take in to counseling for depression when she was in 3rd and 4th grade.  A great resource for us was her teacher.  Her teacher was able to say, "This is not normal for her age of kid."

Other than that, though, we have no problem with therapy.  So I just figured better safe than sorry.

Good luck!

[blessedwithboys]

OP, I have a 9yo ds with some issues that may be similar to what your dd is experiencing.  Care to share some more info?  Describe her temperment as a baby.  Tell a bit more in specific terms of what you are seeing.  My ds has a dx of Mood Disorder-NOS which wil likely change to Bipolar Disorder-NOS as time goes on.