"Why Does He Do That?" helped me a lot too to let go of the walking on eggshells bit.
Â
It does get easier over time... and the more you do for yourself and build yourself up, and just reclaim yourself, it gets much much easier.
Â
If EX gets verbally abusive, I simply hang up the phone. I let it go to voicemail, or text. Disengaging is some of the best advice I received here, it takes time to find the strength to do it. I know the anxious/cringe/waiting for the explosion feeling all to well.... but each time you stand up for yourself and ignore his belittling, you gain another piece of yourself back and it's so empowering.
Â
Be gentle with yourself on eating out. You are doing the best you can. You are doing the job of two people. Remember that. You are human and you can only do the best you can with what you have. If anyone wants to judge you for that, ignore them. You know your truth. Your ex can rant all he wants to your voicemail about it. If he wants the kids to eat better... he can come over and make them dinner. He can bring a healthy dinner to them. Nothing stops these Dads from providing more or doing the things they expect YOU to do. They just like to rant and rave, because it's who they always have been. And you already know, no matter what you do, they will find something to rant about. So, just let it go... *hugs*
