i have been finding that my girl need to TIO as we are putting it, she needs to talk to herself, talk to the universe, sometimes argue a bit to settle herself down. and yeah if i am there "trying" to calm her it just pisses her off or prolongs things. it was so hard the first few times to leave her to work things out, i felt like i was later her cry. so i finally got my phones stopwatch out and times how long it all took, sometimes less than a min, never more than 2-3. in the end i realized that she is a pretty big girl now so from about 10 month on i have let her do what she needs.
my boy on the other hand will almost alway escalate into real tears and that is sad, not ok with me and so very hard for him to recover from. i just moved him out of our room two night ago (temporally into a spare room so he can learn the ropes before sharing the nursery with his sister) and it has been hard, i dont remember how the first few days went when we moved her 2 month ago. but i spent most the night sitting next to his crib trying not to fall off my chair resting my hand on his back, the rest of the night went fine, cause i gave up and brought him back to bed. one day at a time right?
on a fun note we have taken the first of what i hope will be a annual picture (my avatar), with them in jeans and a t shirt and bare feet, i figure it is the one outfit we wil always have for then all the way into adulthood. i am just in love with the first one. it really captures their personalities