??'s about vanishing twin

[lia_joy]

Hi,

I'm sorry if this is the wrong forum for this question.  I spent a good part of my weekend lurking here, as my husband and I had the strong feeling we were expecting twins.  We went in tuesday for an ultrasound to confirm and found out that we were correct, but one of the twins was smaller and didn't have a heartbeat.  Even though I do have  a little sliver of hope that they could be wrong, it's pretty unlikely.  I estimated the pregnancy to be 9wks 3 days (by LMP it would have been 11wks but I knew i ovulated late) twin A measured 8wks 5 days with a clear heartbeat and twin B measured 7weeks 4days with no heartbeat.  The only reason I have any hesitation at all (besides just not wanting to believe) is that she didn't use a transvaginal ultrasound, and it seemed to go so quickly... but I rationalize that she was probably experienced enough to know she didn't need to look any further.

Anyway, I'm trying to accept the loss, but I'm wondering if the morningsickness & fatigue get any better with a vanishing twin??  According to the ultrasound, I lost it almost 2 weeks ago now... Seems like a pretty raw deal to lose one baby and still continue with 2x the morning sickness (not to mention if I'm another week behind in dates relief is likely further off than I'd hoped anyway.)

anyone with experience or thoughts?

TIA

Lia

[AImom]

My first pregnancy resulted in a vanishing twin. It was clear from the beginning (5weeks) that the second twin was not growing and the DR explained that it would probably be absorbed by my body, whch it was. I guess because it was so early in the pregnancy, it was not so traumatic for me, plus the Dr explained that it is actually more common than most people realize and it is one of the reasons your OB doesn't want to do an ultrasound too early as a vanishing twin may be seen and freak you out. My daughter was born in 08 and she is now expecting her twin baby brother & sister any day now. I was actually afraid to expect to keep the two babies at first since I only had one grow to term the first time. For my first 4-5 ultrasounds I kept expecting to see only one baby in there. Just keep your hopes up and nature will take it's course. Just hoping and praing for happy, healthy babies.

[queenofchaos]

Twins or no, worrying over health and life of your child(ren) is something you never escape as a parent.  I have no experience with the vanishing twin situation personally, so I can offer no advice there, only . 

[Shuli]

Our second pregnancy also started as twins. We lost one between the 8 and 12 week ultrasound. There was no indication at the 8 week ultrasound that there was anything wrong, but my daughter was born with some genetic and developmental issues so that may have been a factor. For the first four months after she was born I kept seeing a shadow next to her where her twin should have been (PPD?). It was hard, but I finally realized that I should be concentrating on the baby that I had because she needed me to advocate for her. Two years later I still wonder how life would have been different if her twin would have survived but I try not to dwell on it too much. We are expecting again in two months (another singleton). DH believes it wasn't time for that soul to come to us and now it is.

Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy.