Awkward playdate advice

[Santaminicamum]

We moved to our new town about a year ago and have been getting to know the area. My son is in first grade. Both my husband and I both work, I also have a three year old at home, so my older son does a lot of after school activities.  One of the mums seemed to be a very sweet person when we moved here, and we organized one playdate when they were in kindergarten. She actually dropped her son off at my house and only picked him up five hours later and only when I called her to say, please come and pick him up, he's tired. When she arrived she smelled like alcohol and she had driven to my house with her daughter and another child. I mentioned it, but she seemed to ignore me. my husband and I were shocked and thought never again.she is constantly asking for playdates, and I seem to have used every excuse in the book. Her son was also bitten by their dog a few weeks ago. Their house seems out of control, and as someone new to the community I feel she is not the type of friend I need.  Should I be honest and just say I feel uncomefortable with organizing playdates and think we have different morals? I don't want to hurt her feelings as she is a single mother, but feel like she isn't getting the hint. Do I need to spell it out ie you are not responsible enough with my child?

[LuckyMommaToo]

We have had a similar situation in the past year at our school. My advice is, set your lasers on AVOID. Give only minimal responses. "Sorry, no, that won't work for us." You don't have anything to gain by engaging with her. Ugh -- I feel for her kids.

[Santaminicamum]

Thanks for that. I just replied to her email now, and you are of course totally right, be vague and unavailable.