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do you trade sleep for alone time? - Page 2

post #21 of 58


Originally Posted by Snapdragon View Post

yes!! I regularly stay up at night watching tv or browsing the web or cleaning the house or doing random projects while ds and dh sleep! I ahve learned to get by with less sleep since becoming a mom and I really need that "me" time to recharge. DH is always like- don't stay up too late- because then I am tough to get out of bed in the morning! but yes, me time in trade for sleep.


This is totally me too. Though I'm still in the learning phase of coping on less sleep. I'm the type of person that used to need around 9 hours a night to be functional. I'm lucky to get six now. I've had my son for two and a half months, and I think adrenaline has gotten me this far. Now that the adrenaline is wearing off... I just hope something else kicks in. It would probably make sense for me just to drop internetting or reading before bed, but I can't. I get really grumpy if I don't get a chance to do something little just for me. 


post #22 of 58

YES! I love solitude, and get very precious little of it. I tend to stay up very late, and even fight sleep just so that I can experience waking moments where I do not have to interact with anyone. I sometimes can't wait for DH and the kids to fall asleep, so that I can get a snack and watch a movie, free of any interruptions or requests for exactly half of whatever I am eating. ;)


I used to get up really early in the morning when DS was little, as he stayed up very late, and I just couldn't keep my eyes open at night after he went to sleep.  I trained myself to wake at 5:30, and would sneak out of bed to go downstairs and play Lexulous, or read the paper, or message boards on the net, or whatever.


I love my family and everything that entails, but I NEED my quiet time.

post #23 of 58

Big yes! I'm just now starting to feel more rested since DS is sleeping so much better since turning 3, but I still stay up way later than i should to have some alone time.

post #24 of 58

no words, only this.  caffix.gif 

(and...if anyone ever invented a silencer for the sewing machine, that would be the happiest day of my life.)

post #25 of 58
[quote name="Alphaghetti" url I love my family and everything that entails, but I NEED my quiet time.

yeahthat.gif I often read alone in my nook in the kitchen. Or sometimes I just sit there. There's only one chair and ottoman in there for a reason.
post #26 of 58

am curious - what are your favourite things to do?


as i was reading this thread a lot of what you all wrote really hit home with me. and it struck me - that while i like doing stuff with my dd and friends, i also treasure doing things alone. a LOT.


and i have yet to come across anyONE person who could understand that. it isnt really a question of not having people around me - its more of a time to spend with myself. 


dd and i still cosleep so i feel we get a lot of time together. really sweet times. and i think it meets my people need too. i am a better sleeper with company than by myself. when dd is at her dad's i dont sleep as well as i do with her here. 


i love going to movies by myself. i am a huge movie buff and love the theater experience. 


i love going to my favourite cafe and sitting the sun eating and reading a book. 


my all time favourite is going out on a break of dawn walk in the busy area and watch the city wake up. when i go on vacation i always do this. i love having a  tonne of time so that i can maybe grab a hot drink and saunter home. 


i think my biggest luxury is not having to watch the clock. i havent had a chance to do that in years. 


i also love going to graveyards. what is fun with that is dd goes and does her own exploring so she pretty much leaves me to myself. i think sometimes i really appreciate the alone time i get with her there. that is my favourite part of her growing up. sharing a silence together, knowing i dont have to go and take care of her - is v. freeing. 


oh and another question - have you guys been able to sleep thru the night? after dd finally started sleeping when she was about 3 1/2 i have never been able to do so. my sleep pattern changed completely and i now sleep less than i used to. 

post #27 of 58

I used to find it more necessary to trade sleep for time alone when dd was younger.

Now it isn't such a big deal. I will usually wake up about an hour before dd and stay up about an hour after I send her to bed. I get 6-8 hours of sleep per night now. We spend a lot of time together but dd will often amuse herself for several hours while I do my own thing somewhere else in the house. If I need time alone I just tell her I need a break and it works out most of the time.


Reading is one of my favorite activities.

post #28 of 58

SO FUNNY to read this right now.. i was just thinking about how i do this. 


By the time DS goes to sleep i've had such a long day but i end up staying up way too late most night just to have some time to myself! some nights im getting things done around the house, but a lot of times i just want so be on my laptop or read for a bit. 


im glad im not alone!

post #29 of 58

Originally Posted by meemee View Post


i love going to my favourite cafe and sitting the sun eating and reading a book. 


I never enjoyed doing that - don't want to deal with too many people! smile.gif I see it in the movies, locals spending a lot of time in the cafe, and to me it looks like a punishment.

post #30 of 58

I have to discipline myself.  I used to stay up for hours after the kids were in bed and DH came home at like 1 AM.  Now that he works overnights, I go to bed maybe an hour to 90 mins after the kids, but yeah I NEED that alone time. 

post #31 of 58
Originally Posted by tropicana View Post

wondering how common this is. i guess i'm an introvert, but at my age (40+), i've learned to be more outgoing. but still... i NEED some alone time every day. like, NEED it...


as for me, i'm alone getting the 2 kids to bed, which can be a long process...

This totally sounds like me! Getting DS to bed is a long process and even though I am tired and want to go to bed myself, I tend to stay up to get my stuff done. Sometimes it's chores, other times is on-line time or reading my book. I do limit myself to 1 hour after DS goes to sleep for the night, otherwise I find myself sleep deprived.

post #32 of 58
Totally relate, except I need my sleep.

I own my own business and all my clients are online.
It's taken me a quite a while to get to this place - where my work matches my temperament. smile.gif
post #33 of 58
Originally Posted by DoubleDouble View Post


I never enjoyed doing that - don't want to deal with too many people! smile.gif I see it in the movies, locals spending a lot of time in the cafe, and to me it looks like a punishment.

smile.gif see a good book is like giant headphones for me. i get immersed and dont hear anything. however i will say when i say 'cafe' i mean a particular one - which is quiet - near the window with the sun streaming in. 


but no usually i dont like going into noisy places - unless they are super noisy - having fun' kinda places (not like a loud group of people watching sports) where there are no social demands on you.. i love fairs with lots of people that kinda atmo. i love people watching so i can find my space of silence in the middle of chaos. 


i cannot. tolerate. a$$holes. seriously - too many of them arguing 'stupid' arguments without logic or personal passion - aaargh frustrates me. why i dont know. 


post #34 of 58

yep, but not too much. usually only an hour or so. I know soome people that get 6 hours of sleep a night when they could get 8 or more because they want alone time. I guess it depends on how much you get already.

post #35 of 58

Yeah, you're definitely not alone on this one. In fact, I've been struggling with this especially in the last few weeks because DD went from 2 to 1 nap so I feel like I have no time during the day.  Did I mention I was supposed to be in bed an hr ago?  :)

post #36 of 58

We both do this, the babe goes to bed at 7, then we go to bed at 11.

post #37 of 58

YES. My 60 to 90 minutes in the morning before DD wakes up gets me through the other 23 hours. She likes to be held (and I love holding her) but I need adult time when I can pump, drink my coffee, and be on the internet without a baby on my chest. Not to mention take a shower. I'm on maternity leave from a stressful, intense job, and I've realized that the transition has been rough for me. Being a momma is the best thing in my life, but I struggle with feeling like I'm not really doing anything, or that I have nothing to talk about but baby milestones. I'm sure I'll struggle even more when I have to go back to work...

post #38 of 58

This is so me. I'd rather be sleep deprived than overstimulated and frazzled! I stay up 3-4 hours after DD goes to bed to recharge myself. I'm fried without it!

post #39 of 58

I wake up between 3:30 and 4:30 every day to the lure of a silent house.  It's kind of a pain in the ass.  But I love the quiet in my pretty garage. :)

post #40 of 58

I need to start transitioning my alone time from late night to early morning.  I go to sleep sooooo late.  DD1 goes to bed at 6pm!  DD2 goes to bed a few hours later, with me running in to nurse her at least once (we co-sleep, I join her later).  I mostly google and knit and do projects.  But DD1 wakes up at the crack of dawn which means... I need to also.  

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