Sleep! How much are YOU getting? « Back to Group Discussions

[sajgos]

I thought it would be fun to have a sleep thread. I'm curious how much sleep everyone is getting. Are your babies sleeping through the night yet? Do you still do a feeding at night? Two feeds? Our twins are almost 4 months now and sometimes they sleep well at night, and other times, not so much. Usually we get a long stretch from about 7pm-12am, then shorter stretches after they've been fed.

So! Tonight, they both went to bed at 7pm and currently are both peacefully asleep... hopeful for a good night! The trick is me getting to bed before they wake up...

[cakemama579]

Lucky duck!  Millie usually falls asleep around 8pm, but lately she has been up between 4 and 5 times a night to nurse.  Because DS is in bed with us too (on the other side of me) I can only nurse laying down on my right side (to keep me as a barrier between her and DS).  So, every time it is time for her to nurse my left side, I have to sit up and stay awake.  Needless to say, I'm pretty pooped lately.

[Beckily]

Cakemama (mm, I want cake!) - Have you tried just tilting your body over her to nurse the other side? It's still not something you can sleep through, and kind of sucks on the wrist sometimes, but it's got to beat sitting up!

As for us...!

He starts sleeping in the evenings, usually, around 9, but just nappy sleeps. We go to bed between 10 and 1, usually. I aim for 11. He sleeps hard until between 9 and noon.

Sometimes he sleeps well, sometimes wakes up a lot to nurse. Well, he doesn't really wake up, but I do ;)

For a good long time, he'd wake up at 4, 8 and 11. Now days.. he's nursing every two hours until about 8 and then it's hourly.

If he isn't up as much, I get up before he and his daddy do and I get a nice quiet breakfast. On bad nights, I sleep every one of those 12 hours I can and wish for more :P

So probably I'm extremely rested compared to most.

[copper.kettle]

On a very good night, Will goes down in his crib between 7pm-9pm for 5-7 hours, then nurses every 2 hours after that.  Sometimes I can get him back in his crib, sometimes he's in bed with me from there on.  On a bad night he only spends 2 hours in his crib and then fusses in bed with me every hour.  I think we're doing pretty great, compared to my first son who could only sleep if he was latched on at ALL times and never ever slept alone until about 18 months.  I like that even if it's a bad night, I get a couple hours of me time in the evening since ds1 is usally in bed at that time too.

[Baby_Cakes]

Originally Posted by cakemama579 
So, every time it is time for her to nurse my left side, I have to sit up and stay awake.  Needless to say, I'm pretty pooped lately.

We are sitting up to nurse sisters!!  If I don't sit up, we have lots of puke.  It's bad.  Epic.  Out the nose, spazzing, coughing, sputtering.  I so mourn not being able to side lie.  We need to talk about this more, me and you.  

I'm afraid to calculate how much sleep I get.  Hmm.  Finn nurses down at 8:30 or so. Usually I lay down for the night at 10 with DD.  I inevitably fall asleep with her.  I stagger out to the living room around 12.  Between 12 and 4, Finn usually wakes 2 times (~@230 and ~430) and I nurse him back to sleep and put him back in his swing.  After that it's down hill.  Usually up at 5, 6:30, and if I'm LUCKY he'll fall back asleep and sleep til 7:30 or 8.  DD is up at 8 or 830.  So what is that -- 6 broken hours?

Sucks b/c Finn sleeps from 830 til 230 but I get only a fraction of that.  I wish I could just go to bed with him. 

The past few nights, DD has been sick and not sleeping well.  She's been bouncing around b/w the couch with me, her bed, and DH's bed.  It's been brutal.  That stretch I usually get b/w 12 and 2:30 hasn't bee happening b/c I'm up with DD.  One night she woke at 4 and was UP.  For awhile.

Anyway.  I miss sleep.  I miss it so bad.  I cannot even put it into words how irritable I am and how much I need more than what I get.

Edited by Baby_Cakes - 11/28/11 at 7:43pm

[cat13]

It's reassuring to read your responses to see that it's so different for everyone, yet I'm not alone in the multiple wake ups! River has been getting a good 3 hour chunk of straight sleep in the evening, but then he's up every hour or two for the rest of the night to nurse. I'm thankful that we just side lie nurse, and also that our total in-bed time is about 8 hours or more, even if we wake up a bunch. 

Carrie, what happened? I thought Finn was less pukey lately?

Cakemama,  I have been doing the lean-over to feed off the top boob sometimes. Now that River's head is stronger and my nipples can handle a less-than-perfect latch, it works out ok. Like Becky said, it's tough on the wrists and I can't fall asleep that way, but it works. 

[Baby_Cakes]

He is less pukey, bc I sit up. I slip occasionally out of exhaustion and try side lying. One night it worked!! No puke. The next night i was almost giddy to try it again, and epic fail. Idk what changed, but it just doesnt work. Milk pours thru his nose no matter what angle i try, which makes him unhappy and inevitably he pukes. A lot.

Bc I play by the rules, we dont have any puke at night. Sometimes he barfs all over himself in the swing, but he sleeps thru it. I dont count that.

Sent from my SGH-T959 using Tapatalk

[copper.kettle]

Carrie!  Are you nuts?  Let DH put Nora down and you should go sleep in a BED from 830-230!  At least a few nights/week.  I thought your DH was doing more of Nora's bedtime routine anyways?  Girl, a couple of tweaks and you'll feel so much better :)

[nald1]

Originally Posted by copper.kettle 

Carrie!  Are you nuts?  Let DH put Nora down and you should go sleep in a BED from 830-230!  At least a few nights/week.  I thought your DH was doing more of Nora's bedtime routine anyways?  Girl, a couple of tweaks and you'll feel so much better :)

AND ask DH to get up with Nora in the am- my DH puts DD to bed and gets up with her in the am so I can try to catch as much sleep as possible with DS.  Not ideal by any means- DH and i have only slept together one week in almost 10 months....sigh- but im getting sleep....

[Baby_Cakes]

I've tried!  We've tried.  She screams and throws a tantrum and NOBODY gets any sleep.  The girl is like, melded to my fricking hip.  He used to be able to put her to bed, but he lets her get away with murder in there.  She plays with her toys and all he does is sit on his phone.  He doesn't read to her or force the bedtime issue.  It's annoying and quite frankly I'm too tired/stressed to deal with him not doing his share around here.  But, that said,  I'm seriously going to work on this, b/c seeing it here in black and white on the screen makes it seem so stupid.  There's got to be a better way.

Oh, and ...I found an angle DS can sleep at. He slept like this from 4 am - 7 or so (and only woke up b/c of commotion in the room around him) so I'm sure he could have gone longer.  Yay.  Maybe I can replicate this in the cosleeper?  Idk.  But it sure would make a difference!!

[CrazyCatLady]

I don't want to be hated.  But Veianya goes to bed at 7:30 every night and sleeps through until 6:00-8:30 every morning.  I don't change her diaper in the middle of the night, but I do give her a bottle or two (she sleeps through it).  So really I get as much sleep as I need, especially because she naps a lot during the daytime.

She is formula fed though and I assume that is part of why she sleeps so good.  Though I know some of it is just her personality.  But my breastfed kids were never this easy so I feel for all of you who are sleep deprived.  I remember that oh too well.

[copper.kettle]

Yeah, I hear you on being to tired/stressed to put the energy into a major change. Believe me, I take the "easier in the moment" road a LOT. Esp when it comes to a clingy tantrumy kid. DS1 is a MAJOR mama's boy, and it's only because DH is so focused on our goals and so good with him that he's been able to take over bed time. If DH weren't so determined, I know I would have just wound up in the big bed with BOTH kids waking me up constantly and DH would have been sleeping on the couch full time, lol! It is so freaking hard to find that balance of "whatever works" with "no, THIS is how it's going to be and we've got to work to get there". I think the big detail in your situation is that it's not working. You're not getting enough rest to do what you need to do during the day. My DS1 was such a shitty sleeper, and I was so tired I couldn't even think straight to look at the situation objectively and try to come up with a solution. It sounds like that's where you are.

Your DH is going to have to get on board, but I would suggest you come up with a bedtime routine (jammies, cartoon, 2 books, lights out, back rub/snuggle, sleep), explain what's going to happen to Nora, and then DH needs to stay with her in her room (with no phone!) with her while she tantrums. DH can lay down and calmly reassure her that this is "tuck in" time, and that he'll rub her back when she's ready to calm down and lay down. This is what we did with DS1 and it worked pretty quickly. He was never in his room alone crying. And now? He goes to bed and we have adult time and DH does any night time parenting he may need, and I do Will's night time parenting. It can work!

I know it sounds so easy coming from someone else! Hang in there!

ps, I don't mean to sound like I'm getting on your case!  Sleep struggles have been a BIG part of my motherhood experience so I guess it's just a topic close to my heart :)  And, that pic is too cute!

[Baby_Cakes]

Copper you are so right, its not working anymore.  The setup was perfect for a good long time but we've outgrown it.  I'm going to dig to find some strength and attack it head on!  Thanks for the pep talk and motivation!

And CCL - yes, I hate you.  Haha!  J/k -- I'm glad somebody is getting sleep, even if it isn't me!! Give V kisses for me!! 

[SouthernStormy]

Now that we are fully cosleeping (vs. her sleeping in the cosleeper) she generally goes down around 7 (sometimes a little earlier and sometimes a little later) and she'll sleep until 6 or 7 in the morning. Usually she eats a little more before bed so she doesn't wake for a bottle in the night- if she does its usually around 11 before I go to bed. I'm getting around 7 hrs each night. Could get more if I didn't like to stay up til midnight.

[Chaika]

Anton usually goes to bed around 8, and wakes up once or twice during the night.  At around 6:30 or 7 he is pretty much going to stay awake.  But that's OK with me, as I'm a morning person.  He's always slept for nice long stretches, but when he was littler he would stay up for quite a while after he woke.  Sometimes we had to do two diaper changes and two feedings before he'd go back to sleep.  Now, he is a much more efficient nurser, and is generally awake for 30 minutes or less during the night.  It makes SUCH a difference!  I get much more sleep now.  I used to go to bed around 9, because that was the only way I could get enough sleep.  Now I can stay up later and watch TV shows or read with DH (he loves to read aloud to me, it's sweet).

[nald1]

Originally Posted by Baby_Cakes 

I've tried!  We've tried.  She screams and throws a tantrum and NOBODY gets any sleep.  The girl is like, melded to my fricking hip.  He used to be able to put her to bed, but he lets her get away with murder in there.  She plays with her toys and all he does is sit on his phone.  He doesn't read to her or force the bedtime issue.  It's annoying and quite frankly I'm too tired/stressed to deal with him not doing his share around here.  But, that said,  I'm seriously going to work on this, b/c seeing it here in black and white on the screen makes it seem so stupid.  There's got to be a better way.

Oh, and ...I found an angle DS can sleep at. He slept like this from 4 am - 7 or so (and only woke up b/c of commotion in the room around him) so I'm sure he could have gone longer.  Yay.  Maybe I can replicate this in the cosleeper?  Idk.  But it sure would make a difference!!

I know - sometimes it's not worth a battle.  I dont remember how or why DH took on the pms with DD - I think it started when I was working?  Also, he works all day and that is the only time they have together - a 1/2 hr/day- but it's something that they have their time together.  

I dont know what is going on with my DS - my daughter was not sleeping through the night at 1yr- and we had added formula at that point.  My son has slept fairly well since birth- FAIRLY - I am too paranoid to even put into words the past three nights!!! Let's just say he has amazed me - ok, so he slept through the night three nights in a row now - all the way through.  I know Ill get used to this and be  shocked when he starts being NORMAL and waking up to feed again!!!  He has consistently been going down around 9pm and sleeping anywhere from 2-5 for a while now.  I have no idea why...it actually seems surreal and odd to me!

[SoonToBe]

Not enough! :)

Elliott used to consistently sleep for about 5 hrs for his first chunk and then would go back to sleep for about 3 hrs and then maybe 2 hrs.  Now he is only sleeping in 2-3 hr chunks at most and that's if I'm lucky.  Towards the morning, he is eating every hour or less.  It really sucks because when he was sleeping great, I had bad insomnia.  I still do, but it's not as bad. 

Well, he doesn't actually wake up at night, but the kid will not stop moving sometimes.  Eyes closed, but squirming like he's on fire.  Anyone else have this problem?  It's sooooo annoying!  This morning I got so annoyed I just plopped him in the cosleeper to let him finish his flailing.  He didn't stop moving.  If I sit him up, he falls right to sleep.  WTH!  Any ideas?  I thought maybe gas, but he isn't tooting or burping more than usual.  If he would just stop moving, I would get so much more sleep because he NEVER cries at night and I don't change his diaper unless he poops which is rare except when he had the runs for almost 3 weeks (that was fun). 

During the day he will often take one long nap and then 2-3 little ones.  At night he sleeps usually 11-12 hours, but I get maybe 5-6 on a GOOD night and that's broken up.  Sometimes he will only nurse long enough to get to let down and then soak us and the bed.  Lovely.  Oh Elliott...

[Baby_Cakes]

I hear you on the squirming!  Finn squirms and squirms if I try to hold him and sleep.  He'll head butt me and my shoulder, it's like he just can't get comfy.  Annoying.

And I've had insomnia the past week.  It's awful.  I installed a white noise app on my phone (it's called Relax and Sleep, if you're interested) and I put my headphones on.  One earbud in and one to the pillow.  I can still hear the baby, but I can't hear all the creaks and groans the swing makes or every crunch of kibble the cats eat.  Last night I admittedly gave up and just watched 2 episodes of Frasier.

[nald1]

Originally Posted by SoonToBe 

Not enough! :)

Elliott used to consistently sleep for about 5 hrs for his first chunk and then would go back to sleep for about 3 hrs and then maybe 2 hrs.  Now he is only sleeping in 2-3 hr chunks at most and that's if I'm lucky.  Towards the morning, he is eating every hour or less.  It really sucks because when he was sleeping great, I had bad insomnia.  I still do, but it's not as bad. 

Well, he doesn't actually wake up at night, but the kid will not stop moving sometimes.  Eyes closed, but squirming like he's on fire.  Anyone else have this problem?  It's sooooo annoying!  This morning I got so annoyed I just plopped him in the cosleeper to let him finish his flailing.  He didn't stop moving.  If I sit him up, he falls right to sleep.  WTH!  Any ideas?  I thought maybe gas, but he isn't tooting or burping more than usual.  If he would just stop moving, I would get so much more sleep because he NEVER cries at night and I don't change his diaper unless he poops which is rare except when he had the runs for almost 3 weeks (that was fun). 

During the day he will often take one long nap and then 2-3 little ones.  At night he sleeps usually 11-12 hours, but I get maybe 5-6 on a GOOD night and that's broken up.  Sometimes he will only nurse long enough to get to let down and then soak us and the bed.  Lovely.  Oh Elliott...

this is why I am so relieved LO will finally stay in the cosleeper most of the night - he keeps me up with all his moving and kicking and grunting- but he's sound asleep- at least with the cosleeper I get a little rest from being kicked- although I miss snuggles and am happy to hold him as long as i can when he does wake up to nurse...ah- sleep vs snuggles- the dilemma- I nurse and Snuggle ALL day though, so I choose sleep those nights WHEN it's a choice :)

[cat13]

Originally Posted by SoonToBe 

Not enough! :)

Elliott used to consistently sleep for about 5 hrs for his first chunk and then would go back to sleep for about 3 hrs and then maybe 2 hrs.  Now he is only sleeping in 2-3 hr chunks at most and that's if I'm lucky.  Towards the morning, he is eating every hour or less.  It really sucks because when he was sleeping great, I had bad insomnia.  I still do, but it's not as bad. 

Well, he doesn't actually wake up at night, but the kid will not stop moving sometimes.  Eyes closed, but squirming like he's on fire.  Anyone else have this problem?  It's sooooo annoying!  This morning I got so annoyed I just plopped him in the cosleeper to let him finish his flailing.  He didn't stop moving.  If I sit him up, he falls right to sleep.  WTH!  Any ideas?  I thought maybe gas, but he isn't tooting or burping more than usual.  If he would just stop moving, I would get so much more sleep because he NEVER cries at night and I don't change his diaper unless he poops which is rare except when he had the runs for almost 3 weeks (that was fun). 

During the day he will often take one long nap and then 2-3 little ones.  At night he sleeps usually 11-12 hours, but I get maybe 5-6 on a GOOD night and that's broken up.  Sometimes he will only nurse long enough to get to let down and then soak us and the bed.  Lovely.  Oh Elliott...

I'm having this problem too! Woke up at about 4am, nursed River, then he wouldn't stop squirming. I got up to go to the bathroom, and when I got back he was perfectly still. I made DH scootch over and sleep next to River while I slept the next almost 2 hours in peace with no baby next to me!