How often to bathe/wash hair??? (Help me settle this disagreement with my husband...) - Page 3

[blessedwithboys]

I discovered Bronner's Magic Soap several years back and now I buy Baby Mild by the gallon.  My boys use it on their (fairly short) hair, faces, and bodies.  I use it on my face and body, vuvla included.

I was intrigued a few years back by the thought that our bodies become dependent on cleansers after years of use, so I waited til a cold day (not too many of those in FL!) and then showered in just plain water.  Did that for a few days and I couldn't stop clawing at my girly parts!  Holy crap did I get one raging case of the itchies.  haha  I gave up on the detox and went back to Bronner's soap, happily so.

And while I totally get that adults and older kids have stink that littler kids just don't have, littler kids poop and pee on themselves, and I personally feel that plain water isn't enough to clean off poop.  So, in my world, diapers=daily bathing with soap.

[jess in hawaii]

Originally Posted by alicewyf  Last night I told him he smelled like cumin and to not come near me until he had bathed (I am pregnant so I'm sure that makes it worse)!

I'm sorry, I am laughing at this because I LOVE the smell of cumin! I don't like regular stinky guy smell, but if it smells like cumin it's totally like an aphrodisiac. I have intentionally fed my husband extra cumin in an attempt to make him smell like it 

[DoubleDouble]

My husband smells like cumin and spices, too! He doesn't get stinky (not for a few days), he smells awesome!

[mambera]

DD1 (2) plays around in a plain water bath most days (+/- soap to crucial areas depending on her level of cooperation) but has gone up to 3 days with no bath when things get hectic.  I think hair gets washed about 1x/week, she is very uncooperative with that though so the thoroughness of the wash is often suboptimal.

DD2 (7 weeks) gets a full-body oil massage and bath with hair wash most days also, has also gone up to 3 days max without though (Thanksgiving weekend was busy).

Both get their bottoms washed with very mild baby soap every time they poo (although I am thinking of starting to do otherwise with DD1 since she is daytime trained and getting too big to wash that way).  Neither has ever had a soap reaction.

I feel gross if I don't shower daily myself.  I just don't like it.  Wash hair 1-2x/week (it is long and gets dry otherwise).

Re the pool, I agree with pps - need to wash chlorine out of skin and hair afterwards for sure. 

[cameragirl]

DD gets a bath or shower every other day, or more often if she's gotten stuff in her hair or is stinky. Her hair starts to get noticeably greasy if we go longer than every other day for washing.

[peaceful_mama]

DS is 7, he showers every morning before school with no prompting from us.  He requested the AM shower.

DD is 4 1/2, I *absolutely* make sure she showers in the morning if she wet her bed, very few mornings she *doesn't* shower.  actually she likes baths, so it's a bath.  Her hair doesn't get washed with shampoo often, I do a conditioner wash at least once a week though.  Her hair type dries out with too much soap.

DS2 is 3 and not PL, so at least once a day in the tub scrub of body.  I don't force the hair issue, his is really short right now.  DH is more likely to wash his head.  More often if it's a really nasty poop diaper.

DS 3 is on a feeding tube right now, not doing solids.  I bathe him a few times a week, more when necessary, extreme body fluids all over situations.  Hair a couple times a week minimum.

I agree on the 'stink' issue.  DH is even more aware of that than I am, he instituted a rule that they must shower when he requests it, like if we are going out somewhere special.  I never quite 'got that'.  We discussed it though and I agree, we don't accept it as normal that our kids smell at all, it's better to teach them to do what they need to so that they DON'T stink.  ;)  and in the summer yeah they probably do.

[Alphaghetti]

My kids are 11, 9 and 7. They bathe every 2  days, sometimes more, at my discretion.  My girls (the older two) wash their  hair every time, as it gets greasy now if they don't. My 7 yo doesn't always use shampoo every bath - more like once a week, but does  use soap each time.  In the summer months, they often bathe every day, as they are normally covered in dirt, sand and sweat from playing outside.

I went through a phase where none of us used soap or shampoo. This lasted for a couple of years. None of us were smelly. We still bathed. In the end, I decided that I missed my silky, shiny hair, and just couldn't get the balance right with the No-poo, so the entire family switched back to commercial human cleansers.

If my kids don't bathe, they smell like sweat and/or bum. Yuck.  I have a very sensitive nose, and that little kid dirty smell just grosses me out. Regarding genitals, my children NEVER use soap on these parts. DS is intact, and he practices the 3 R's, but no soap. They just rinse with plain water, and none of them have ever had a redness, odour or infection issue.  I don't use soap on my genitals any more either. I noticed as I was getting older, that I was getting more of an odour. I mentioned it to a friend, and told me to stop using soaps, and only clean the external area. Once I started doing this, the new odour was gone! Our labia and vagina are kinda like self cleaning ovens. I am teaching my daughters thusly. Please excuse the potential TMI. :)

[ekh]

Thank you everyone. I don't think that my girls need their hair washed every day, but it's just going to be a rule that their hair be washed every Sunday, after they are in the pool. My husband is German and they certainly don't bathe there as often as we do, so that's the source of this disagreement. 

My children are in the bath several times a week (at least the younger one is, the older one has been avoiding it, so I need to make sure it's happening...).

My husband bathes every day, but his issue is washing their hair with shampoo. (He thinks water is plenty.) I think their hair looks stringy and smells bad if it doesn't get washed with shampoo at least once a week. He thinks it looks dry and "washed out" after I shampoo it. I'm not sure we're really going to be able to agree on this one...

[Imakcerka]

I like this, I'm going to see if they'll go uw free with their jammies.  I think they'll do it.  They usually only sleep in uw.  So maybe I'll get them some loose shorts.
 

Originally Posted by meemee 

i think dd is just sensitive in the crotch area. hmmm however i cant imagine how she would not be wiping properly esp her vulva area.

we wash her crotch area with water every two days or so or she uses a bidet so no itchy bum or red crotch.

what i find interesting with her (and it may be her thing) is her vulva area is red from wearing underwear the whole day long (mind you comfortable pure cotton underwear - not too tight, maybe a little loose). dd prefers being naked at home, she doesnt like pjs. she prefers just the top (what is that called - a night shirt?). when she is home just in a dress with no uw there is no redness.

also what's funny she is less stinky underarms when she is not wearing clothes.

[NYCVeg]

Dd 5, gets a bath twice a week or so in the winter, more often in the summer (the sunblock/sweat/sand/chlorine combo is just disgusting). She has very dry skin and is prone to eczema and her skin looks much, much better if she doesn't bathe too much. We wash hair once or twice a week--again, it looks and feels much healthier than if we did it more. 

FWIW, EVERY doctor/midwife/etc. I've been to has emphasized the importance of keeping soaps off the genital area to keep the skin healthy, although certainly some people have less sensitive skin than others. 

[sharon71]

Daily bathing with soap is hard on the skin,so with that being said my youngest DD takes a bath 2-3 times a week and washes her hair 1-2 times a week which in itself is a major battle. LOL

[cristeen]

My 2 yo gets maybe a bath a week.  When i deem him stinky or his hair is getting encrusted (he runs his hands through it when they're covered in food).  His hair only gets washed when it's getting crusty, and for us "washed" means water and BS.  I do not use soap on him, and never have.  BS or plain water has been plenty. 

That being said, for myself, I'd love a shower every day, but reality is that it doesn't happen.  But I go about a week (7-9 days) between hair washings (also with BS).  When I used to use shampoo, I had to wash my hair every other day or it would get nasty, but now once a week is plenty.  Your body really does start depending on that stuff.

As for the question of sensitive crotches, both DH and I have similar issues.  If I sleep in underwear, I will start getting a rash in the fold between leg and crotch.  So I tend to sleep without, whether I have pjs on or not.  If DH doesn't change his underwear at least once a day (I mean, wearing 1 pair in the morning and a different pair in the evening), he'll start getting a rash.  So he changes his clothes completely when he gets home from work and doesn't sleep in underwear either. 

As for smell - so much of it is dependent on personal chemistry.  Diet, health, exercise, genetics all effect our personal smell.  As do things like living space (living with a smoker, in a house with poor kitchen ventilation, if you regularly use a fireplace, etc.), and laundry habits (frequency, type of detergent, washing temperature, even types of fiber in the clothes).  Daily showering does not address all of those things.  I've known plenty of people who showered regularly who I don't want to stand too near because i do have a sensitive nose.  Yet my toddler who is still wearing diapers and gets a weekly bath when he starts smelling too ripe (usually ammonia) doesn't bother me most of the time. 

[mambera]

Originally Posted by ekh 

My husband bathes every day, but his issue is washing their hair with shampoo. (He thinks water is plenty.) I think their hair looks stringy and smells bad if it doesn't get washed with shampoo at least once a week. He thinks it looks dry and "washed out" after I shampoo it. I'm not sure we're really going to be able to agree on this one...

Do you use conditioner after washing?  This may help the dry/washed-out issue.

[cat13]

I have a question for those of you who say no soap on the genitals... is this for boys too? Please forgive the my naivety, but I'm still learning about boys! (DS is 15 weeks)  Sometimes he gets an explosive dirty diaper with poo everywhere, even on his scrotum which is almost impossible to clean without a bath. In that case, do you only use water? What's the harm in using soap?

[saralm]

Our 2 year old takes a ba2-3 times a week but that has been a struggle recently so it isn't ver consistent.  She used to take a shower with us every morning but now hates the shower.  It's cold at our house so I don't feel like she is getting very dirty anyway.

[cristeen]

Originally Posted by cat13 

I have a question for those of you who say no soap on the genitals... is this for boys too? Please forgive the my naivety, but I'm still learning about boys! (DS is 15 weeks)  Sometimes he gets an explosive dirty diaper with poo everywhere, even on his scrotum which is almost impossible to clean without a bath. In that case, do you only use water? What's the harm in using soap?

The harm in soap has been covered several times in this thread already, I believe with links, so I'm not going to repost those.  But the basics are that most soaps contain all sorts of toxic ingredients that you really don't want near your babe if you were to do the research.  And, soap dries out the skin.  Eventually your body also becomes dependent on it, losing it's own natural abilities to protect and moisturize.

For those explosive diapers, try an extra wet washcloth.  Not damp, but not quite dripping, and you want something with texture, like terrycloth or the rough side of cotton fleece.  My DH never understands why I can get DS cleaner than he can, when he only gets the wipes barely damp and I soak them.  I tend to use a flannel wipe to get the bulk of the mess, and then a cotton fleece wipe to get the last bits. 

And if you really feel like you need to give him a bath to get him clean, sit him in the warm water for a minute or two to let it soften, and then try something like a peri bottle, or a squirt bottle (like ketchup or mustard come in) of warm water (you can try dissolving a tsp of BS in it if it's not enough) - it's a lot gentler.  Like I said above, my 2 yo has never known soap.  I use BS on his hair, and then let him soak in the BS water, and that's been plenty.  For myself, I use Dr. Bronner's Baby soap (the Baby is Unscented), but I screwed up my body chemistry years ago, and I'm doing my best not to inflict that on DS. 

[Alphaghetti]

Originally Posted by cat13 

I have a question for those of you who say no soap on the genitals... is this for boys too? Please forgive the my naivety, but I'm still learning about boys! (DS is 15 weeks)  Sometimes he gets an explosive dirty diaper with poo everywhere, even on his scrotum which is almost impossible to clean without a bath. In that case, do you only use water? What's the harm in using soap?

I'd say it's for boys too. My son is 7, and uses no soap on his genital region. He is intact and retractible, so he just rinses under his foreskin, and uses a cloth or his hands to wash his stinky butt ;) No soap. In the case of a child still in diapers, I can see the need for a little soapy refreshment, but maybe when you bathe him, the soap that ends up in the bath water can be enough to do the job? Just a thought. Please don't apologize for your question - we all learn as we go along! Or, we ask our friends at MDC. ;)

Quote:

Originally Posted by cristeen 

The harm in soap has been covered several times in this thread already, I believe with links, so I'm not going to repost those.  But the basics are that most soaps contain all sorts of toxic ingredients that you really don't want near your babe if you were to do the research.  And, soap dries out the skin.  Eventually your body also becomes dependent on it, losing it's own natural abilities to protect and moisturize.

For those explosive diapers, try an extra wet washcloth.  Not damp, but not quite dripping, and you want something with texture, like terrycloth or the rough side of cotton fleece.  My DH never understands why I can get DS cleaner than he can, when he only gets the wipes barely damp and I soak them.  I tend to use a flannel wipe to get the bulk of the mess, and then a cotton fleece wipe to get the last bits. 

And if you really feel like you need to give him a bath to get him clean, sit him in the warm water for a minute or two to let it soften, and then try something like a peri bottle, or a squirt bottle (like ketchup or mustard come in) of warm water (you can try dissolving a tsp of BS in it if it's not enough) - it's a lot gentler.  Like I said above, my 2 yo has never known soap.  I use BS on his hair, and then let him soak in the BS water, and that's been plenty.  For myself, I use Dr. Bronner's Baby soap (the Baby is Unscented), but I screwed up my body chemistry years ago, and I'm doing my best not to inflict that on DS. 

Re: the body chemistry, it is possible to fix this!  Just be prepared to be a little stinky for a few weeks, but your body will adjust, and no more messed up chemistry. Worked for me, anyway.
 

[mama_ness]

i think once a week for young kids is perfectly fine, especially in our midwestern climate.

if my kids have been ill or something, or playing in the mud, or it's really hot and humid then yes... more regular bathing. 

i shampoo their hair once per week. it never looks greasy and they do not ever smell bad. i keep their hair up in braids or ponytails so that they don't get food or other junk it it. 

my 10 year old is starting to show signs of puberty. her hair is looking greasy quicker and she can develop an odor. i have been having her rinse off in the shower every 2-3 days (rinse but not wash hair, wash body with soap) and that has solved things. She now shampoos her hair twice per week. 

my kids all have various extremes of eczema and it is better for their skin to be bathed less often. 

i personally shampoo every other day and rinse the rest of the time. it has made a huge difference in my scalp. 

[XanaduMama]

I haven't read all the other responses, but I wash my kids' hair way less frequently than once a week. Only if it seems really dirty or something do I force a shampooing on them (they're almost-6 and 3.5, btw). They both have curly hair, though, and washing too frequently makes the tangles much worse. I do try to wash it after swimming, since you mentioned that, to get the chlorine and other pool yuckiness off, but sometimes it's only a rinse.

ETA, since it's come up: my kids bath every night, but they rarely use soap--maybe once a week or so, at the most? I sometimes add vinegar or essential oil to their bath water, but I think water is enough unless there's a real dirt issue. My own hair is much less greasy and healthier since I stopped washing it every time I showered (which used to be every day; now I shower every couple of days though at the moment I often bath with the kids at night)

[Honey693]

My 1 and year old get two showers a week (I'm lazy and just take them in with me), but their hair only gets washed once a week b/c DD1 hates shampoo.  They get spit baths (my gramma calls them this, I'm not sure what they're really called) at least once a day .They get full body washed with soap at each shower though.  DH and I shower every day.  My hair gets so nasty if I go longer than that.