December 2011 Whatever Ladies Having Babies ~ We are down to one! - Page 8

[Baby_Cakes]

I would love to want it more.  I would love to get back to where we were before getting pg with Finn - couple times a week, nothing too crazy, lots of fun.  I know we'll get back there once I'm not so tired and things settle down.  But DH thinks its the end of the world!

A date would be awesome.  I'm hoping in the next month, we can get MIL to babysit both kids for us.  I think for a few hours midday it would be fine, especially on a weekend if my FIL and BIL are also there.  I would love dinner and a movie.  I want to feel HUMAN again.  

I love my kids, they are the best.  But I'm finding that having two littles leaves me with very little to enjoy outside of them.  I still have my own interests and wants and needs, but I never really get to explore them.  So.  A "date night" with DH would be great.

Oooh, I could never bf while dtd.  I get a little squicked.  Too much "use" of my body and not enough personal enjoyment, lol. 

I've been doing my kegels till I'm blue in the face at night (actually just while I'm laying down falling asleep) and while I do feel a difference, I think it's going to take more time.  Mine are bladder and rectal, luckily my cervix is where it's supposed to be.  Nothing is painful, it's just sometimes uncomfortable.  And nothing is "in the way" if we DTD, but I think I"m just more aware that something is still off down there, and it makes me clam up.  I just don't want to "visit the issue" with DH.  

I set my clothesline up in the basement.  Do you have some place to put it inside?

[MarineWife]

Two things about desire to DTD. First, I would guess that any lack of desire at this point is from BFing. The hormones needed for that are really good at killing the sex drive, another way it works as birth control. Second, obviously, being exhausted from taking care of two kids can kill it. It's hard to get in the mood after spending all your time and energy taking care of everyone else and not knowing when or how much sleep you will get.

On that note, I think that if the man wants more sex, he needs to step up and take on more home responsibilities so that mom can get some rest and recuperation. I know I feel a lot more loving toward Sean when he takes care of me and the kids. I also love it when he does housework. I read in a successful marriage book recently that the husband doing housework is the #1 turn of for married women. So get those guys an apron and a vacuum and put them to work!

I want to put a clothesline in my back yard but I don't know if there are any rules against it. If there are, they would be city or county since we don't have a HOA. I didn't know they made retractable ones. The main thing that has kept me from pushing Sean to do it is that I didn't always want a line running across the yard and those ones that look like umbrellas don't work well for sunning. I'm thinking that, with a retractable one, I wouldn't even need to put poles up. I could attach one end to the house and the other to the fence or something like that.

I weighed myself this morning (I do every Monday). I'm now less than 3 lbs. above my pre-pg weight.

JJ ~ Revisiting the bedtime thing. I would suggest not trying to hard to get baby to go to bed at a certain time every night. Trying anything like that always ended in major frustration for me. Babies sleep and wake around the clock. They don't know day from night, really. Just get sleep or rest whenever you can as baby sleeps. Things will even out and become more regular as time passes. There's no need to try to force such a young baby into your idea of a regular schedule yet.

[MarineWife]

carrie ~ about AF, no, nothing. i've had 3 episodes of just the tiniest bit of pinkish spotting since just after thanksgiving. each time it has only been once or twice when i wiped, not all day and none on my panties. i wore a liner yesterday when i went shopping jic and nothing happened. i did have one huge glob of what appeared to be EWCF the first week that sean was home before the first spotting. there was no mistaking it.

idk what it is. i've had mucous continually. it's that kind that always confuses me. it's clear and slippery when i wipe but not enough to grab hold of and stretch. it may just be creamy or it could be ewcf that's just not enough to stretch. i think creamy was my BF BIP in the past. TCOYF says 2 weeks of the same CF not getting wetter is the BF BIP but i don't think that includes EW.

[akind1]

JJ - ITA agree WRT sleeptimes for baby. DD is 2 months old and I've always just put her to bed whenever we go, even though sometimes she's been sleeping for a couple hours in her rocker downstairs, or sometimes is sort of awake. In that case she just lays next to me on the bed (sometimes nursing, sometimes not) until she falls asleep. But then, DH and I don't have a set bedtime for ourselves either. the earliest we really go is 11:30. sometimes it as late as 1 a.m.

Are you using the co-sleeper at all (or pack n play) or is Tenley just in the bed with you? and are you on one story or two? I think a routine is more important than a schedule; if you are on one story (or don't mind trodging up and down stairs) I say lay her down in her co-sleeper/pack and play/crib/your bed after one of her evening feedings -whenever it seems like she might sleep for a bit after. For DS, it was around 9 or 10 o'clock I think when he usually had his last of the night. then you get a little bit of adult time to do whatever - clean if that is your thing, or read, or watch TV with DH, before you go to bed. DS started taking his long stretch of sleep pretty early in life, so he'd sleep from that 9 or 10 o'clock nursing to between 2 and 4 in the morning. then he'd nurse usually every hour afterwards.

If you are on 2 stories, like we are, I do the same thing, except find a safe spot for DD to sleep in downstairs and bring her up to bed when we go. The main difference is sometimes this wakes her up and I need to nurse her back down. She will normally sleep until about 5 a.m. no matter what time she's nursed last. Last night, for example, we went up to bed around 12:30, and she nursed then, and I put her in the pack and play. I brought her in bed with us to nurse and cuddle some more around 1:30 or 2. Sure enough she woke around 5 to nurse, and 6. then she slept until 8ish. but I really do try to focus on just a routine and not the time. because I am not a stickler for schedules for myself, it is hard to impose that on the kids.

Carrie - totally try to manage that date night as soon as you can! That is one plus to living with the ILs, we can go out pretty much whenever. I do take DD with us though. She's little enough that she's not a disruption or distraction, and also I don't think IL's could handle both at once. My parents can and have though :) I am a rambling machine today! LOL

[Baby_Cakes]

Originally Posted by MarineWife 

idk what it is. i've had mucous continually. it's that kind that always confuses me. it's clear and slippery when i wipe but not enough to grab hold of and stretch. it may just be creamy or it could be ewcf that's just not enough to stretch. i think creamy was my BF BIP in the past. TCOYF says 2 weeks of the same CF not getting wetter is the BF BIP but i don't think that includes EW.

I haven't had any EW, just creamy/lotiony.  It's clear, not whitish, so I hesitate to call it creamy.  But no way is it EW.  

I can't believe I'm already talking CM!!  I want more time not to worry about it.  LOL.  We still haven't 100% decided on a vasectomy.  I had a dream (nightmare??) the other night that DH was adamant about having a 3rd and was refusing the surgery.  I woke up panicked!!  

Oh - and JJ - I agree w/MW about the bedtime routine.  It'll come to life on its own.  These days we have it down to a time on the clock pretty much, but it wasn't like that at first.  I just went to bed with the baby and DH took over with DD. 

Hey -- anyone want to offer advice on how to get DD to accept DH's help?  It's just not working.  I thought there was going to be some huge shift where she'd become more attached to him while I'm busy with the baby, but it's like the opposite.  She's so anti-daddy and it's making things...tricky.  Im trying to be sensitive with her but it's difficult.  DH takes things so personally after so many rejections from her ("No not YOU!!  I want mommy to do it!!)  and honestly he's so willing to help with her and offer to take her places but she wont go.  She claims she'll miss me.  Normal?  Phase?  Thoughts?

Kat - we cross posted.  I'd take DS but I think he's old enough now that he'd be fine.  Plus...it just wouldn't feel like a break.  I don't want it to feel like an errand, you know?  Besides, in DH's mind, the kids "come b/w us" enough and I think if I wanted to bring Finn along he'd see it the same way.

If we were going to go to NYC I'd totally bring Finn.  That's a no brainer.  But down the road for dinner?  Nah.

[akind1]

Finn is older too - and probably awake a lot more. For us, DD sleeps nearly 100% of the time we are out. I would totally leave him for dinner and a movie with DH at his age.

Gabe with us definitely does not = a date night! he's work!

I wish I could help with the DD/DH thing. Is there anything they've done in the past that is mostly a daddy/daughter thing - like a particular book?  or activity? or anything that they could do (daddy daughter mani-pedi's? LOL)? Is she old enough that a bribe/reward thing might work, like "if you let daddy put you to bed tonight without fussing, you and mommy will do xyz tomorrow?" or a sticker chart that she can kind of earn a big thing, like a whole outing with you to herself or something? I don't know if any of that would work. Just an idea. DS is too young for that to work. The only thing that kind of does is joint time with DH on the iPad. He loves playing on it with him.

[MarineWife]

my dh says the same thing about the kids coming between us. frankly, i think that's really immature. blaming the kids for you not getting enough attention (sex) isn't going to endear me to you. there are ways to work around the kids being there to still stay connected. it just takes a bit of imagination.

idk about getting DD to accept dad's help. i think trying to force it will only make it worse. could your dh take Finn instead so you can focus on Nora? they say it doesn't have to be a lot of time, even just 5 minutes could help. does your dh do fun stuff with her that doesn't involve trying to get to to go to bed or take a bath or whatever it is you are trying to get him helping with? maybe some plain old Nora dictated fun time with dad would help. ask her what she wants to do with dad.

in the meantime, you may just have to wait until she's a little older. i think it's around 3yo that kids naturally start to move away from mom and toward dad but dad has to be present and positively involved in daily life. Nora is just 3 so she needs more time. and i think you have to be careful that she doesn't feel like she's being pushed away from you in favor of Finn.

[Baby_Cakes]

Bribes and promises and what not don't work, we've tried.  And DH is always around b/c he works from home.  After he "gets home" he plays with her and they have a blast -- then bedtime rolls around and she starts with "I don't LIKE you anymore, I want MOMMY to do it!" and if we push it, she'll start crying and get very upset.  Not worth it, so I cave and do bedtime.  It's actually ok b/c she does go to bed easily, but I inevitably fall asleep with her, and then once I wake up DH is either waiting up for me to see if I'm "in the mood" (which I never am, I just woke up, you know?) and then I usually dream feed Finn and we all go to bed.

In the middle of the night when/if she wakes up is the tricky part.  LOL last night she came into our bed and squished herself in the middle. I was up already nursing Finn.  She was right by his feet/butt and he farted right in her face.  She asked to go back to her bed with me when he was done eating.   Mama's bed isn't so nice and comfy when you're squished b/w Daddy and Farty Finnley! 

I think DH's attitude is stupid and immature too, MW, but if that's how he feels then he's entitled to those feelings.  I don't agree with them, but I'm not him and I can't imagine how pushed out he feels.  I mean, DS and I are basically one unit.  He helps where he can but as long as I'm feeding him and taking care of him all the time, DH is just a helper.  Now DD doesn't want anything to do with him.  I bet he's feeling very 3rd wheel.  I try to make him feel appreciated and loved (I think i'm pretty nice and I always to nice things for him, make him lunch, compliment him, kiss him when he walks by, etc) but it's not the same to him.  It doesn't make me want to have sex with him though, you're right about that. 

[akind1]

It may sound silly, but is bedtime that big a thing to have him do? If it really isn't something that needs to change, I say why mess with it. It seems like he gets lots of daddy and Nora time between work and bedtime. For me, it is the morning where I need help the most.

It does seem like the middle of the night thing is working out ok.

I know with nursing mama+baby are pretty inseparable, although is there awake time between feedings where he can take over? (maybe even take both kids you can get some "you" time to feel more . . . you?) I don't think it is entirely unreasonable for him to want some time with you to himself - even if it's not for sex. Maybe that's because I feel the same way, only I'm usually edged out by electronic devices LOL. Though maybe you need to let him know that he doesn't need to wait up. You will be sure to let him know when you are in the mood, so to speak, if that should happen. (in a nice way of course). He needs to do his part though to make sure you are willing - seems mostly that involves helping out with the kids. It is great that he at least tries to help.

Love the farty finnley!

[MarineWife]

maybe just changing the way you view that time with nora would help. instead of thinking of it in negative terms of her rejecting dad and you caving, try to think of it in positive terms, maybe an example of how much she loves you and what a good mom you are. kids are really good at feeling our negative energy even when we may not be aware of it so changing that energy may help.

i agree that he is entitled to his feelings but they are his responsibility, not yours. if he wants something to be different, he needs to take positive action to change it. i'm not saying that you should ignore him. but, again, if he wants more of your time and attention, he needs to free it up for you.

it's like sean telling me he wants to have more time for just us. he'd like to go to dinner or a movie or whatever, and then expecting me to do something about it. if he wants to go out without the kids, he needs to find a babysitter, check with me about what day/time is good and set all of that up. if he doesn't, then he's just putting one more thing on me to do and i've already got too much so that's not going to happen. KWIM? You can be sure that if I wanted to go out, I'd schedule a babysitter and all that other stuff.

[onetwoten]

Sorry ladies for being so sporadic. I'll try to answer what I remember... 

I've wondered about reflux, but she doesn't seem to be very bothered by the spitting up-- I would have thought it would bug her? And she seems to do it almost as much sitting up as laying down. You've got way more experience with it than I do though-- anything else I should watch for? 

She had one huge vomit last night that completely emptied her stomach contents, no doubt about it. It came out her nose and everything, and DH and I were sitting here pretty much crying with her. That's the only time she's seemed bothered by the spitup at all. Other than that-- it just bothers her that we need to clean it up! lol. 

What signs would I look for if the spitting up was related to something I'm eating? Again, I feel like she would be more upset in terms of tummy problems, outputs, etc, but I'm not sure.

Annie-- that's exactly our problem with the nursing/spitting up, or at least what her doctor thinks-- that since she's nursing for comfort, but still getting milk... she's just overfilling herself, and then making herself vomit. I wanted to wait until 6 weeks to introduce the soother, but we've had to give it to her already in an effort to curb the throwing up. It does seem to be helping a bit, but we're still trying to use it only when we're kind of at our wits end and know that she shouldn't be hungry yet (ie after she's just had a huge nursing session, but still won't calm and is rooting. 

As far as the scheduling-- I don't mean like I want her to go to bed at 8pm every night.. just some sort of routine that we can expect. Right now there doesn't seem to be any pattern to her waking/feeding/longer sleeps. Also, she doesn't really seem to ever just be 'awake' for more than five minutes or so. She's either sleeping, eating, or screaming with us trying to caml her. *sigh* I keep trying to say at about 8pm or so, "ok next time she feeds, we'll make this bedtime and take her to the room" but then 9pm or so rolls around and it takes two hours for her to fall asleep... and then she won't actually leave our arms.... 

She does sleep-- but the problem is that we're having a LOT of trouble putting her down once she falls asleep. Even waiting up to an hour, within five minutes of putting her down, she's up again. She's sleeping in her bassinette in the pack and play, in our room. If I let her sleep on me, then she'll sleep fine-- but that doesn't always work. I don't sleep as deeply, plus it means I have to sleep sitting up, and I wake up very sore. She can't just sleep in the bed with us, because a/ we're too tired for it to be safe right now, and b/ DH is too heavy/ spread out a sleeper for it to be safe. There's just not enough space for me to put her in the bed without it being a worry. And I'm sick of him sleeping on the couch. It doesn't work for any of us, because then he doesn't get proper rest, and he's not as helpful the next day because he's exhausted. 

Anyways.... had a breakdown last night that culminating in me lying in bed crying and DH trying to soother her and me at the same time. I was just sooo exhausted. I think I'd only slept about 5-6 hours really in the last two days. But she did better last night (although the whole thing almost was sleeping on me, or in bed beside me while DH slept on the couch, but at least it was sleep), and she had a two hour nap in the bassinette today, so I feel human. Here's hoping tonight goes the same or better. 

Carrie-- All I can do is give hugs. I want more children, but I look at the difficulties we're having right now and I know that next time I would need live in help for at least two weeks. And I dont know how Id balance it after that. It seems so hard

[akind1]

JJ: I haven't had to deal with real reflux. BUT I think if she is truly reacting to something you ate, you might see a difference in her poops, like green and mucousy or something outside the realm of normal.

In regards to a soother - it's not that I don't believe in nipple confusion, certainly it must happen for some babies, but DS had a paci on day 2 of life and a bottle of breastmilk within his first week. We breastfed for 15 months. DD we tried a paci early, but she just wouldn't take it until around the 5 or 6 week mark. Both the nursery nurse and our very pro-bf'ing pediatrician made the excellent point that babies do need to suck, and it needn't be on you all the time. (Unless of course you really don't mind or baby won't have it any other way). I say keep trying the soother. If she's really hungry, she won't accept it. Otherwise it is a bit of a godsend. (especially in the car, and for DH)

Bed: If you are really concerned about bed safety, in order to get you all in the same bed, have you thought about a bed rail? I have one similiar to this one:  It is nice and high and long, and works with up to a king sized bed. We used it with DS once he was mobile and continued until around he was a year or a little more - he could get on and off our bed safely by that point. With the bed rail Tenley won't be between you and DH. FWIW my DH is quite heavy, but since having kids, he clings to the edge of his side of the bed. LOL I don't worry much; though I used to keep one hand on him when DS slept between us, to make sure DS had enough space.

I don't know if it would help the transfer, but I noticed with DD that she woke up because whatever I was laying her on or in was cold to the touch. So I started holding her with a blanket and laying her down with it, so it would be body warm and smell like both of us. It seems to have helped. Are you wearing her at all? not going to help her sleep separately from you, but may give your arms a rest.

HUGS! I know it's tough but it's not forever.

[MarineWife]

i 2nd the bedrail. i have one so D is between me and the rail, not another person. in the very early weeks, you have to do whatever works so that you can get the most sleep.

btw, wrt to dad feeling left out of the mother/nursling dyad, it's dad's job to take care of mom at that time. that can certainly keep mom and dad close and helps baby learn there is another person around to take care of things.

[MarineWife]

for those of you who may not have seen this on FB. http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/moral-landscapes/201112/dangers-crying-it-out

i know we don't use CIO but i think this is also a good argument for co-sleeping since it alleviates all the situation in which a baby might become distressed.

[Baby_Cakes]

Originally Posted by jeninejessica 

She does sleep-- but the problem is that we're having a LOT of trouble putting her down once she falls asleep. Even waiting up to an hour, within five minutes of putting her down, she's up again. She's sleeping in her bassinette in the pack and play, in our room. If I let her sleep on me, then she'll sleep fine-- but that doesn't always work. I don't sleep as deeply, plus it means I have to sleep sitting up, and I wake up very sore. She can't just sleep in the bed with us, because a/ we're too tired for it to be safe right now, and b/ DH is too heavy/ spread out a sleeper for it to be safe. There's just not enough space for me to put her in the bed without it being a worry. And I'm sick of him sleeping on the couch. It doesn't work for any of us, because then he doesn't get proper rest, and he's not as helpful the next day because he's exhausted. 

Anyways.... had a breakdown last night that culminating in me lying in bed crying and DH trying to soother her and me at the same time. I was just sooo exhausted. I think I'd only slept about 5-6 hours really in the last two days. But she did better last night (although the whole thing almost was sleeping on me, or in bed beside me while DH slept on the couch, but at least it was sleep), and she had a two hour nap in the bassinette today, so I feel human. Here's hoping tonight goes the same or better. 

First, hugs.  Second, this is life with a newborn!!!  It DOES get easier!!  If it didn't, nobody would ever have more than one!!

The putting her down stuff is totally normal.  That's practically every baby.  I know you've read about the 4th trimester.  She wants to be close to you!!  She was just in your belly and doesn't want to be out of arms!  You won't "spoil" her.  Don't worry -- that stuff comes later when they're toddlers and tantruming for candy and gum at the checkout, lol.  Right now just trust your instincts and do what feels right.

Do you guys have a recliner or rocking chair that you could recline in?  That might help.  She could sleep on you that way.  Or I have to throw another rec out for a swing.  It might give you the break you need to catch up on sleep.

Reflux.  Ok.  If she doesn't seem in pain then she is probably just a happy spitter, which is what Finn was for quite awhile.  If you notice she's having trouble putting on weight or seems to be uncomfortable, those are signs of reflux that need to be addressed - especially the weight.  Holding her upright for at least 20 min after she eats can help.  Get lots of bibs and burp cloths!  You'll get used to the puke.  Hopefully you're able to nurse side lying b/c I'm STILL sitting up to nurse him (last night I stopped counting after 6 wake ups -- I'm a zombie today!!!) and then laying him back down in the cosleeper after he burps.

I put my cosleeper on an incline.  Here:

And it's not as serious as it seems.  They do/will grow out of it (it's already better over here than it used to be).  It's just really messy.  And - not for nothing - but the puke out the nose was the first sign something was "off" with Finn.  I hadn't seen that with DD and it was weird.  Right after that started, he really started puking a lot.  And it would burn -- he would do this high pitched pain scream, then immediately root for more milk (to soothe his burning).  

It could be something you're eating but, most likely not.  Some babies are born with immature sphincters and they just need to mature.  I was doing a vegan no soy diet for over 2 months with no difference in his spitup.  Caffiene made no difference.  Neither did chocolate, tomatoes, onions or anything else I tried eliminating.  Finn will just have to outgrow it.  That's all there is to it.

Oh and I put his hazelwood necklace back on b/c I really noticed a difference in his puking with it off for even 2 days.  We'll wait with the amber.  It didn't seem to help him with the teething at all anyways.

Some babies just need to suck.  I say follow her lead and give her the paci.  Especially since she *is* taking it.  A hungry baby won't accept a paci.

And again -- this crazyness?  It really does get better.  You had a long hard labor, too, that you're probably still processing, so let all those emotions out.  Cry.  Be mad.  Talk to your DH, talk to anyone.  It's really hard to go through something so life changing and then jump right in to caring for a baby!!  Especially a colicky tricky one.  So.  You're normal!  There is nothing wrong with you or with anything you're doing either -- remember we are just offering advice.  You are her mama and you know what is best.

AFM - The whole DH putting DD to bed would be nice b/c Finn goes down at around 830 or 9 and sleeps til at least 12, sometimes 2.  I miss that sleep stretch b/c I'm doing DD's bedtime.  I know, I know.  But I'm *not* a single parent, and DH is just sitting around playing on his phone or computer, and I'm TIRED.  Like I said, I go to bed with her around 10 and usually fall asleep but it's a short nap, I'm not really resting.  Then I leave and gather DS, and he's up then at 12, 2, 4...etc.  I never get a long stretch.  I fantasize about nursing him down at 9 and going to BED.  In my own bed!!  And sleeping a whole 4 hours instead of 45 min!!  

I'm so sleep deprived, it's horrible.  DD picks up on my stress and acts out, I know it.  And of course it makes me short tempered with her.  So.  It would really help out.  Otherwise, you guys are right, I just need to adjust my perspective.

[MarineWife]

jj ~ i agree with carrie that what you are describing is normal life with a newborn. it will get easier as time passes. but, in the meantime, the only thing i suggest is that you do what you need to in order that you and baby are comfortable and getting as much sleep as possible. other people's feelings just don't matter right now. it really is all about you and your baby.

carrie ~ hugs. i can feel the exhaustion and desperation in your written words. the only thing i can think of is to bring dd into bed with you anf finn to see if you can get them both to sleep at the same time. if that works, you could then move dd to her bed, maybe have a little time to yourself and go to bed when you are ready. i really don't think forcing nora to accept daddy when she is very distressed about it will help anything at this point. i'm afraid all that would result in more lost sleep for you.

[Baby_Cakes]

Originally Posted by MarineWife 

carrie ~ hugs. i can feel the exhaustion and desperation in your written words. the only thing i can think of is to bring dd into bed with you anf finn to see if you can get them both to sleep at the same time. if that works, you could then move dd to her bed, maybe have a little time to yourself and go to bed when you are ready. i really don't think forcing nora to accept daddy when she is very distressed about it will help anything at this point. i'm afraid all that would result in more lost sleep for you.

Thanks.  If DH sleeps elsewhere I don't mind DD in the bed, but since we have a queen (and our room isn't big enough to upgrade to a king) all 3 of us don't fit comfortably.  I'm on DH to put the futon together so someone can sleep there (he or I, I don't care, I just refuse to sleep on the couch any longer) and that will help at times.  I agree that "forcing" her to do anything isn't going to work.  Not like you can force a kid to do anything -- they just fight it with every ounce of their being anyway.  Right?  

Plus we all have colds.  I don't think DD is going to make it for her 1st day of school on friday.  She has a terrible cough and cold.  I have it now too!  Stinks.

[akind1]

Will Nora go to bed before Finn? or is her normal bedtime the absolute earliest she will go? And if your DH isn't in bed yet at Nora's bedtime, can she fall asleep with you and Finn in yours, and then move her to her bed when he wants to sleep? Just throwing out ideas! I am so thankful that DS has been pretty easy about bed time, and we have additional people he will let put him to bed when I can't.

I probably am sleep deprived . . . I just function anyway. I went ahead and woke up at 5:45; DD was wanting to nurse and for some reason fighting it side lying. The air in our room is super dry (really need to hook up the humidifier) and this makes her really snorty. I love having her in bed with us - even if for some reason she gets the lion's share of the space (this seems to be inevitable with co-sleeping).

HUGS and lots of coffee for everyone!

[MarineWife]

carrie ~ if you moved dd once she's asleep, you'd have room for you and dh, wouldn't you? we could fit 3 of us on a queen comfortably. we're little people, though.

we're all on the tail-end of colds. mine wasn't too bad. E and K had coughs and lots of congestion. i just had a little sinus irritation. D has a stuffed nose but it's not too bad.

i am so angry and disappointed right now. today is bowling day. i was really looking forward to it. i needed to get these kids out and doing something. i got everyone loaded in the car and it wouldn't start. i had turned a light on in the back for D last night and left it on! (something i fuss at the boys about.) i couldn't get a jump from ryan because he's half asleep and doesn't know where his keys are. that adhd kid would lose his head if it weren't attached. have i told you guys that he has come back from work looking for shoes? he forgot to put any on before leaving.

[**mom2one**]

Carrie - when I was trying to do naps with DD (3) when we first had Dax I was sooooo frustrated because she wouldn't go to sleep and I was just thinking the whole time how I was losing out on my sleep because the baby was only going to sleep for two hours so if I wasted 1 hour trying to get DD to sleep that meant less sleep for me - but then I decided to try to get her to "help" me.  i got her to lay next to Dax and told her I needed her to help me get Dax t stay asleep so she would put her arm around him and I told to close her eyes and pretend she was sleeping in case he

saw her with her eyes opened (lol, I can't believe that worked!) anyway this is the result:  Maybe this could work at night and then like Kat said you ( or your DH) could move DD into her bed.  (Sorry I am not sure how to move that picture to where I want it)  This was when he was only about a week old, and yes I was right there the whole time to make sure nobody rolled onto him!

JJ - I am sorry you are having such a hard time!  I feel for you.  I was super emotional after all of my babies - I cried over everything - I even cried because I was crying!  I cried when the phone rang - and then I cried when nobody called to see how I was doing! lol  It will get better!  Dax spits up quite a bit - and it seems like a lot each time but he is definitly still gaining - he now weigh 15 lbs at 7 weeks!  He has gained a pound a week since birth!  So I wouldn't worry too much about the spitting up.  I know at first I would go through ALL of my receiving blankets and a ton of sleepers every day but he has slowed down in that now.  

We got some pictures taken on the weekend. We have friends who are aspiring photographers and they just got a bunch of the lighting equipment etc and wanted to practice - so we were the willing volunteers (actually they asked us).  It was a lot of fun!  I got some pics back from one of them and am still waiting for the others - I will post some when I get them all.

I was telling someone the other day about how much Daxton weighs - 15lbs at 7 weeks and they were like "is that all right?"  I had never thought too much of it - my girls were the same way and are definately not overweight - or even chubby at that!  What do you think?   My MIL says that DH was 20lbs at 3 months so I think they must get their baby fat from him - I was chubby too as a baby and we are both slim people now so people just think it is weird for us to have such big babies.

Oh - Dax is now having a few nights where he sleeps for 4 hours!  SOOOOOO nice - although the first couple I was still awake after 2 hours wondering what was wrong - now I just sleep right through!  I am not going to expect it to last though -it could be a growth spurt right??

Hope everyone gets the sleep they need - or else nice strong coffee!