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post #121 of 267

Boots, congratulations!!!! How wonderful--17 months may feel short compared to some, but it is still a dang long time! So great that you have such a wonderful RE and that your insurance covers monitoring, etc!


You guys should def join the August DDC and hopefully I can join very soon! If these tests are right, then my DD would be August 14th (very close to yours, Monkey)! 

post #122 of 267

chica - That would actually be the same as my EDD! That would be fun!

post #123 of 267

Boots- I did not try as long as most of the rest of you (we were 9 months), but I have an excellent OB that referred me to the RE almost immediately because of Endometriosis.So, I would also be on the encourage people to go see an RE train.  I'm so happy for you! Monkey- Glad to hear things are looking much better!

post #124 of 267

monkey - thanks for the hugs and your sweet comment. I hope to join you in the August DDC too!
I'm so sorry you have to go through this uncertainty. I'm glad your temp is back up! I wonder if you were just extra cold for some reason, maybe a small cold? Sometimes when I get sick my temp drops instead of raises. I'm sending prayers anyway. Stick little bean!


brichole - I'm 5 days dpo. We're testing on the 19th.
I totally sympathize with the relationship you have with your SIL. It is so hard to go through fertility troubles and be close with someone who is so fertile, especially when you're TTC at the same time (I have a bit of a similar relationship with a friend who began TTC #1 at the same time as I did. She's now pregnant with #3, and I'm still trying for #1). As much as you love them and are happy for them, it's just so hard for you. I'm glad SIL has been supportive of you through your treatments and struggles. I hope you get your BFP soon. It wouldn't be fair to wait another 7 years. Do you think after a while trying DH might change his mind and agree to see a specialist?


chicajones - I'm still feeling icky. I started throwing up today too, which is not fun. I hope I do hold out. It was hard last cycle when I didn't get a clear neg or pos so I had no idea what to think.
Ok, with that many faint lines SOMETHING has to be going on! I totally understand not wanting to see that 'not pregnant' with the EPT though. I'm sitting on the edge of my seat waiting to hear more.


cbaa - I hope this time is  different for both of us too. I feel the exact same way about the 2ww with progesterone - pain but no gain yet.
I'm glad your cold is improving, but it sucks that your sex drive is dwindling. I hate that infertility makes sex almost like a chore sometimes..you have to do it even if you don't want to because you're ovulating. I hope things go well anyway and you fertilize those eggies!


gozal - that's interesting you didn't get the pain with three mature follicles, but at least you didn't have to FEEL it! I bet it did happen overnight for you.
I really hope you are pg this month. It's completely understandable that you get upset/sad when people mention ds's age, especially since you envisioned having your second before he was 5. I do think it's more exciting for older children when a new baby comes along, but I totally understand how awful it must feel. You're allowed to be no fun right now, this is HARD!


Sourire - I'm glad your spotting stopped! WOOHOO Vegas! I hope you have an amazing time.


renavoo - not much going on here, just feeling sick from the progesterone and waiting, waiting, waiting. What about you? How are the little beans?


bootsvalentine - WOOHOO!! Congrats :)  I'm glad you came to share and I am definitely thinking sticky baby thoughts for you. It's good to hear the success stories of others who have struggled like we have. I know for me it gives me a lot of hope. I hope you'll drop in once in a while to let us know how you're doing.


AFM, waiting..waiting..waiting. We're testing on the 19th, so it's not too far away. I'm a member of a community called 'Day in the Life' on another website. We basically just take pictures during our day and string them together in a type of story. I did one for the day of our first IUI this cycle. I thought it might be fun to post a link to it here, so if you're interested you can find it here.. http://ditl.livejournal.com/1403728.html#cutid1

I hope everyone is having a nice weekend!

post #125 of 267

Shesaidboom, I loved your Day in the lIfe! Those chinchillas are awesome, they look so cute. :) I'd love to try a DITL type blog entry some day.

post #126 of 267
I'll come back tomorrow for some love with the personals, for tonight I just need some IF support. I went to 'girls night' with some girlfriends... Well, more like my sisters girlfriemds, who in fairness are turning 30 and I'm 26... But, they all have kids... 2 yrs, 15 mos, 11 mos, 7 mos, 8 weeks. So my sister is expecting #2 in June, and another girl announces after we're all there, she is also expecting #2, in July, .... Dum dum dum, heres the best part, it was an oops, and 'so not in the plan'. So then I get to listen to how crazy it is to get preg and not know it (this is the 2nd time for her and the mother of the 8 week old was a surprise too) and how the doctor said were you using bcp, no, condoms, no, chsrting, no... But OMG How did this happen... Then the preg symptoms and labor and delivery, and what about daycare and being up all night with the baby and nursing, and on and on and on... I held it together because I'm a rock star... And also because I hate public crying, I hate people fake feeling bad for me, or making a scene, or embarrassing myself... But I just need a hug... It sucks because I promised myself I would not isolate myself because of my IF and other peoples good fortune... But I really feel like God was testing me tonight.

On a brighter note, let the BDing begin, successful BD this afternoon and plans for many more. U/S at 9am tomorrow.

Gemmine- whats the word cycle buddy?

Shesaidboom- i feel like I learned so much about you in your day in the life! Sorry youre feeling sick already from the progesterone, yuck!

Confession : I had a boston cream donut & bbq chips & hot tamales with hot cocoa for dinner... I always do this, i cheat real bad then beat myself up over it... Also we're having a surprise bday party tomorrow that the birthday guest thinks our surprise is a preg announcement.. Woo hoo, surprise, youre 22 and we are still not pregnant, who wants cake!?!?!
post #127 of 267

chicajones - Thanks! They're a lot of fun to do. You should do one :)


cbaa - Firstly, big hug2.gif to you. I'm so sorry you had to go through that. I don't think age makes a difference. It hurts no matter how old you are, 26 or 45. I think that a lot of people take fertility for granted and don't consider that people may have trouble. I can relate to wanting to isolate yourself because of the pain social situations like that cause. I am definitely guilty of that. I think it's really great you're trying not to though. I really hope that next time you'll be able to announce your good news because you'll get your BFP. More hug2.gif and love to you.

post #128 of 267

Cbaa, hug2.gif I'm so sorry that your girl's night was such a difficult time. I feel like so many people "complain" about things these days because they want the attention and it is sad especially when they don't realize that it hurts other people. But we're all here for you and rooting for you. I think you deserved the boston cream donut and bbq chips :o) And yah to good BDing!


Shesaidboom, what a great day in the life!! I love the photos, by the way...What kind of camera do you have? I love photography and there was a time that my camera and I were inseparable but since work has been so busy I haven't had time to take any photos. I'm a canon girl :o)


Chica, I'm waiting anxiously for your next update!


Boots, CONGRATS!!!


Ugh, insomnia again so I'm up at 2:30am. But I think I'm ready to try to sleep again. We got our tree last night, which is exciting and i'm looking forward to decorating it!


Hope all is well with everyone! Monkey, I'M SO HAPPY THE TEMP WENT BACK UP!! I really do think that the temp drop was a fluke. I do think it'll be good to get a series of betas done though...I think that it'll relieve your mind if you see the betas doubling.



post #129 of 267
Real quick cause I'm on my phone and need to get ready for church: *hugs* cbaa - You are a rock star! That totally, totally sucks. Fertile people can be so cluless!
post #130 of 267
Thread Starter 

Monkey, I am so, so happy and relieved to hear that everything is fine. I forbid thee from taking they temperature any more! Just kidding, but I hope for your peace of mind and ours :) that you can get those betas. 


cbaa - total rock star. I don't think there's anything wrong with insulating yourself a little from people who don't get what you're going through (or you just don't want to tell). My mom and I are super close, but with IF, she honestly has no idea what to say to me or how to support me. She always ends up saying something to me that upsets me. So I've stopped talking about it with her for the most part. In some ways, it does put a little distance between us, which hurts. But on the othe hand, I know life is like that, and when I'm in a different place emotionally, we'll be just as close as ever, again. I have learned that many people are more scared of having an unintended pg than of not being able to get pg when they want to; it's like they cannot connect to the potential pain of our situation. It's a kind of empthatic blindness. I tell those friends who I feel comfortable telling. (Also, I'm surprised how many of my friends who have 3+ kids had a difficult time getting there - they have not forgotten the pain and fear of that and end up truly comforting me.) Those that don't seem to get it - without even trying to, necessarily, I see them less. Which is fine. Life really does have seasons, and different friends will walk with you through different times, then others will take their places, and it doesn't mean you don't love them all the same. A hard lesson for me to learn (I want everything to be perfect all the time) but I have learned it in my thirty-odd years on earth!


bootsvalentine, I am so happy to hear your good news! Congratulations!!! I don't know what you're talking about, 17 months is a huge long time! For me it's been about 15 months since I first demanded that my OB figure out what was wrong, and 2.5 years since DS reached 24 months and we waited with baited breath for my first PPAF that never came. We were "trying" before that but figured I was still in LAM until 24 months PP. But the last 15 have been the worst, by far. I completely agree with what you said about getting over to the RE's sooner rather than later. I wish I had. Same situation here, actually our insuarnce is pretty crappy (we have a high premium, high co-pay, high deductible, and in-network is only covered at 90%), BUT we have been able to at least get coverage for almost everything so far, since IF diagnostics are covered. (BTW, IME, with US health insurance companies, it differs not company to company, e.g. Aetna vs. Cigna, but what plan your employer selects within that company. We have Cigna but a crappy plan under Cigna. We've had other Cigna plans that were a lot better, including at DH's present employer. His employer only offers one plan (no choices) and it changes every year. It is extremely frustrating!) Anyway...sending tons of good and sticky thoughts your way. Chica, you too - I'm really good at sticky thoughts, I promise. I can generate TONS. :)


Brichole, thank you for sharing your story - you have been through so much, lady! My heart broke several times reading what you've been through. I can tell you, from within the academy, that I believe college education in the US to be a racket. Not that I would discourage anyone from seeking education (I've devoted a lot of time and passion to it!) but I think it's something to be done...wisely. Your job is incredibly important. You should be proud of what you do! I hope you will be able to continue your studies when your LOs are a bit older, so you can have more choices (and the joy of it, of course). But in many respects, I'm not sure that your choice was unwise at all. You have built a great life - family is the most important thing. Some of my favorite fellow students or students I have taught at the university are those who return to seek education/change careers/learn something they love.


shesaidboom, oh my are those furry little creatures that cutest things EVER! I loved your Day in the Life. I've tried to do a Project 365 but I never got farther than a few weeks. Maybe I should try again. I wish my house didn't have such abysmal light. Hey, do you or Renavoo have any camera-buying tips for me? We are on a limited budget but I feel like my beloved point-and-shoot Pentax is at the end of its life span. I'd love to get an SLR but I think it's way out of our budget. I too prefer to go with camera companies (like Pentax or Canon). Just trying to distract you so the 19th comes sooner. :)


Gemmine - how's things? Thinking of you.


Sourire - I hope by now you're good and Vegas-ed up! I'm glad the Crinone is treating you well. I also wanted to thank you so much for sharing about your siblings. Seriously, it made me feel so much better. It re-focused me on DS being able to really understand getting a new sibling rather than focusing on what he's missing by not having on already. I am now trying really hard to think about this as an extended family-building time, something I've looked forward to my whole life that we get to do for a while longer. Mind tricks, sure, but whatever gets you through the day, right? Renavoo, I tried your mind trick too - I can usually work myself over using probability! But I guess because I'm in a transitional phase in my career, it's a little trickier for me. DS will be starting kindergarten next year (probably - he's right near the cut-off so depending on his readiness) and I'm graduating this spring, so I really should be looking for a job. But I don't want to because I want to spend that next years having babies. I wish I could sort of "go on" with my life but my next steps depend on whether we get pg or not. If anyone has any advice, please do share. I've been in this situation for a long time now and I feel like maybe it's time to accept that I'm not going to get pg anytime soon and I should try to focus on my career. But I sort of don't care about my career anymore. Eek, I can't believe I just admitted that so plainly. But it's true.


Renavoo & Deborah, keep on growing those babes!!


AFM, nothing really new here. I'm not even having trouble not POAS. Actually I am dreading it. I wish I could just wait for my period, but I have to stop progesterone first. Thanks everyone for being so kind to No-Fun Gozal! I like my senses of possibility and humor and hope they find me soon. I'm going to just go ahead and officially blame Clomid/Ovidrel/Prometrium for my black cloud!

post #131 of 267

renvaoo - A Canon girl over here too! I have a Digital Rebel xti that I use with an external flash bounced of the ceiling or walls. It rarely ever leaves my side, but I totally understand about work. When I'm in the classroom we're not allowed to take pictures, and I'm much too busy anyway.



gozal - thanks! I love my little furry butts. I'm doing Project 365 as well. I started it on the first day of my first IUI cycle to follow our journey. It can get challenging on days when I don't feel like dragging out the camera, but it's mostly fun. If you do start one again, I'd love to follow it if you're willing to share the link to your photos.
As for camera buying (get ready for a novel, OH NO!!) - you could try to get an older model SLR as they're coming down in price quite a bit. If not, I've heard great things about the Panasonic Lumix. I always like Canon Powershots though. You can get them fairly cheap and they take nice quality shots, especially in daylight. I`ve learned a few tricks with point and shoots that helped me like mine a lot more before I saved up for the SLR. One thing I learned how to do was diffuse the flash so it's not so harsh. I really dislike flash, so this helped a lot. The easiest way to do this is to just fold up a white sheet of paper and hold it directly over the flash. You have to play with how many layers you'll need. Another way is to use some opaque tupperware or if you have a flash that pops up, you can cut out part of an opaque, white film canister and fit it over the flash. After learning how to diffuse flash, I started playing around a lot more instead of sticking to outside, daylight photos. I'd also recommend checking out Understanding Exposure by Bryan Peterson out of the library. I've learned so much from that book! And remember, it's not necessarily the camera, but the photographer who takes great pictures. Some of the best pictures out there have been taken on $50 cameras. Thank you for the distraction! I love talking photography.

I think blaming the clomid/ovidrel/prometrium for the moods is right on. Meds are harsh!

post #132 of 267

Don't have much time...busy at work having to look stuff up to compile for the new merg...just wanted to let everyone know i got my job offer.  $16.31/hr plus an extra $3.35 an hour for "health & wellness" which goes towards my health insurance!!!! I'm Actually pretty excited.  I did get almost a $2 raise and if you add in the $3.35 that will pay for my insurance and what's left goes into 401k i will be making almost $5 an hour more!!! YAY!!! i'm really excited and nervous at the same time.  Looks like they aren't going to be keeping up on the same shifts for too long so i will more than likely be going to 3rd shift (10pm to 6am) I'm not happy about that but what can i do?  At least i still have a job!!! I will try to write more later when i get home and i can catch up on the thread a little bit!!

post #133 of 267

Gozal- Will do! The twinsies are definitely making lots of hormones. I had great numbers Friday and today I feel sick as a dog (never thought I'd be so happy to feel awful). My progesterone was 129 and Estrogen was 2032. Not sure the ranges but the nurse said they were good numbers.

post #134 of 267

shesaidboom- I love the photography talk- Someday I will invest in a Nikon DSLR- For now I just can't make the commitment to actually learn how to use it. I hate taking pictures with my cybershot- I think it is a sony or something, but it is terrible quality. I would like something mostly automatic that takes 'great' pictures.... I want all the gain and none of the 'pain' AKA time and learning that goes into it! Your photos are beautiful, I love the animals! Hope you're hanging in there with the prometrium side effects.


gozal- I get you on being to scared to POAS, I went through that last month. I will send all my sticky fertile thoughts you way for when test day comes, it must be close by now, are you 12 DPO? Congrats on being almost finished your degree too, it is so hard to make plans for the future when it is so uncertain... I hope it all unfolds well and you won't have to worry about it, there is plenty of time for career 'someday'.


brichole- Congrats on the raise & getting the contract! 3rd shift will be tough, but you're right, it is still a job and having one now is a good feeling! Thanks for sharing so much about your family, you have had a hard road behind you, now it just has to get easier!


Sourire- I hope you had a great time in Vegas! We were there for a week in October and we had such a great time, I'd love to hear all the details about your trip so I can reminisce. I bought a 'I'm what happened in Vegas' onesie, but I didn't need it... when you get your BFP next week I will send it to you, because ya know technically, implantation is probably starting now!


deborah- sorry you're feeling sick, but I'm glad its because you've got 2 babies growing in there!


monkey- I'm glad to hear the temp was a fluke- hopefully after the betas you will be able to take it easy. Are you going home soon to meet your nephews?


chica- anything new today? I hope that line is getting darker!


Thanks for all the love & advice after last night, I am feeling better today. It is just so hard. I think we all feel that sometimes. I will just be more careful to avoid situations that are going to put me in the line of fire... I mean, it is one thing to lock yourself in the house and not see anyone, but another to purposely put myself in a situation that is going to depress me.


Had my first ultrasound today, bad news is, my follicles are all still small- it is CD11 instead of my usual CD12 for first U/S, but they were 14, 13, and 11 where in the past they have been closer to 17-20 at this point... I am guessing the cold with fever I had for 3 days delayed things, the good thing is, my estrogen was already 424- last month it never went past 250, so YAY, all the things I have been doing to boost my estrogen worked, I forgot to ask about my lining, again. I have to go back Tuesday AM for another U/S so I will ask then.

post #135 of 267

shesaidboom - Yeah, I guess I was just extra cold or something stupid. Temp was up today, too, so looking good! Also, where on earth did you get your adorable chinchillas? I thought they were illegal to own since they're endangered. Are they girls, boys, or one of each? And the other furries are cute, too. The whole DITL was really well done. I have another friend who does DITL and other photography stuff too (also on LJ!), and I'm extremely jealous. I checked out some books on photography once upon a time, but I never got around to doing much with them. Some day! Sorry you are throwing up again, too. Yuck! Hoping and praying it's morning sickness, not just progesterone sickness. We will try to distract you until it's testing time!


cbaa - To be more long-winded in what I said earlier - Wow. You are tougher than me! I almost certainly would have butted in at some point and been like, well, at least you CAN get pregnant. Sheesh. And/or started crying. I am NOT good at not crying, even though I hate crying in public, or in front of strangers. Or people I know, for that matter. Does your sister know about your fertility struggles? If so, it's too bad she didn't say something to change the direction of that conversation. But I think like gozal said, a lot of people are far more afraid of getting pregnant when they don't want to than they are of being infertile. And a lot of people don't seem to have even fathomed that it's possible for them to not get pregnant when they choose. Grrr. In any case, I say you get my vote for IF sainthood! And that I'm totally okay with your dinner choices. goodvibes.giffor your sexathon!


renavoo - It doesn't seem fair for you to have insomnia after all the time you put in at work. And yes, I'm very glad my temps are back up, too!


gozal - I always enjoy reading your posts. You're so much wiser than me! And I'm sorry this cycle has been such an emotional dark spot for you. BTDT, it sucks. And I was completely dreading POASing, too. I'm hoping your dread turns into joy, but either way, hug.gif to you! I can't imagine how hard it is to watch your baby grow up without the siblings you'd always planned for him. But I do know a lot of people (my dh included) that have really special relationships with their much-younger siblings, so I'm hoping for that for your ds, too!


brichole - Bleh to the night shift, but yay to everything else! When do you find out what your new insurance coverage is like?


AFM, not a lot going on here. Temp is back up, so I guess Friday was a fluke. Had a good time just hanging out with dh on Saturday, which was something we really needed. Also, dh is now officially in charge of family finances. This is both a relief and very nerve-wracking. It's a relief because I don't have to do it any more, although I didn't mind too much, but mostly because now I don't have to be the one to say, no, I don't think we have money for that. I HATE always being the "no man." It's nervewracking because I'm not entirely sure that we're not going to end up in some emergency situation without the money to cover it because dh isn't really into having an emergency fund, or at least not a very big one. That's a big reason why he's taking over the finances - I think he needs the first-hand experience of our family money flow to understand why some things just aren't feasible. And you know, he may surprise me - it may turn out we can have a lot more fun and spend a lot more money and still be just fine. That would be fine by me, too. I'm just tired of feeling like a killjoy, and feeling like dh only half supports me in our budget, even though he's theoretically agreed to it. The good news is that dh doesn't believe in debt or living outside of your means any more than I do, I'm just much more conservative than he is. Anyway, I will quit boring you with our finances. I am still going to try to get some beta tests set up, but it doesn't seem like there's any sort of major blood draw lab in this little town I'm in, or anywhere nearby at all, so I'm not entirely sure it will be possible. We are going to Colorado next Sunday, though, and staying in Denver, so I might do it then if I can't figure it out beforehand.

post #136 of 267

brichole - congrats on the raise! That's awesome news :)


deborah - glad to hear the twinsies are doing well.


cbaa - I totally understand wanting the gain without putting too much time into learning. I think you'll find you really *want* to learn with the DSLR because there's so much you can do with it and it's loads of fun. I had a Sony Cybershot as well and after a while just felt like I couldn't do any more with it so I wanted something better. Thanks for the comments on my photos! I still need a lot of work, but I love taking pictures.
I hope those follicles get growing! They sound promising so far though. Maybe three leads or even more? Hurray for the awesome estrogen levels. What were you going to get them higher? I can't remember everything from your posts.


monkey - I'm glad your temp was up again! I'm looking forward to hearing about your betas.

Are chinchillas endangered? They're definitely not illegal here as they sell them in pet stores and sadly there are chinchilla fur farm around in both Canada and the US. Mine are both girls that I got from a rescue. I really didn't want to end up with babies so it was one sex or the other! Rory (the black and white one) was three months old when I got her and Lenore (the white with grey ears) was still a tiny baby (6 weeks). Can you share your LJ friend's name? If they post in the DITL community I'd probably recognize them! I'm friends with a few people in there.
I'm hoping the sick is morning sickness too, but I don't think it is since I think I'm coming down with something. Thanks for the distractions, they are definitely MUCH appreciated!



AFM, I'm hoping it's a good sign that my symptoms are a lot worse than last time. The breast pain is insane. Does anyone have any tips for how to deal with it? I can't fall asleep because my nipples hurt so bad. I'm having trouble wearing bras and as a big chested girl I can't exactly just not wear one except when I'm home. I think I'm also getting sick. My whole body is sore, especially the left side of my abdomen. I really hope getting sick doesn't affect implantation and all that good stuff!

post #137 of 267

I agree Brichole- Congrats! Cbaa and Shesaidboom- Thanks. We have now officially told all of the extended family except for my uncle and cousins on my mom's side (we've barely talked over the years and my mom has resentment toward her brother. They do talk on her birthday which is the 18th, so I imagine she'll let him know then). I figured since we had a really good ultrasound and I'm being extra careful while I bake these babies, it's fine to share with all the family now. I don't anticipate that I'll be able to wait until 12 weeks to tell the public since I'm growing two (even though I'm a first time mom), so I'll probably share with the rest of the world on New Year's Day (thinking right after midnight) and post a picture of baby new year, say  something like : "Baby New Year? Not exactly. However, cautiously expecting two babies of our own 7/25!". I will be 10 1/2 weeks and will have had at least 3 ultrasounds by then.

post #138 of 267

gozal, I think you're right about the employer picking insurance plans. I was just surprised that what sounded so initially crappy (not covering anything beyond oral meds) was actually enough for us and my early pregnancy monitoring is covered without switching me to an OB. Man, the last OB I saw was so disinterested in helping me get pregnant. It made me feel really useless for her to be like "just try another three months."


Ladies, I know I am new here but I am feeling things that I don't think anyone who hasn't waited for awhile would understand. Although I've never had a loss, I am so, so paranoid about my pregnancy. I don't feel like Clomid could have truly been enough (especially a low dose one cycle) and I think this is not real. Every day I start out okay and by the end of the day I am just a mess worrying about things. I kind of hate watching people on the due date club be so "oh just wait and see " about everything, when obviously they have no idea what it is like to try and wait for so long especially for your first baby.

Right now I'm near tears because I figured out based on when I O'd I am only 5 weeks tomorrow. I am so regretting telling anyone and the cards we sent to the grandparents yesterday. I don't know what I was thinking. According to the calculations I just did, we won't even have a hope of seeing a heartbeat until the day after xmas. I don't know when this is going to feel real or safe, but right now I wish I would've kept it all a secret, but I was so happy, but now I feel stupid. I don't know that I really trust my body to carry this baby.


post #139 of 267

Shesaidboom, OOOOH I'm ever more hopeful for you. I also had the worst breast pain I had ever had during my 2 ww. I still have it and just avoid anything touching my nipples except the bra. And on really bad days, I'll use a softer bra. But otherwise, I hope you're pregnant so that it'll all be worth it :o) I actually revel in it now as I haven't gone to the doctor in almost a month and I'm relying on this sign as proof that everything is ok in there. I really hope so! (next visit is this friday!)


Boots, i so understand what you're saying...but please don't over worry yourself. I am 11 week now and I'm STILL afraid of telling people i'm pregnant. I don't think the fear goes away because the risk of stuff happening is always there even after the 1st trimester. My DH also says that we just have to let everything take its course. I, of course, obsess, especially as I'm starting to feel a little better and I haven't seen the babies in a while. I never thought i would MISS the constant nausea (these days, I just have a little nausea once in a while, typically in the evening). i know the feeling of jinxing yourself. but just think that in most cases, things will be fine. By the way, I saw my babies' heartbeats at 6 weeks 1 day through a transvaginal ultrasound. You may want to get an appointment for next week to check it out to put your mind at ease.


Monkey, I hope your DH learns his lesson about the finances! it's a good trial by fire, although then again, I realize it would be nervewracking! Finances always are. But i have faith that things will work out, especially since he does believe living within your means. I think most of the trouble comes when people think it's feasible to live on credit cards!


Cbaa, i know that some IVF regimens actually aim to take things slower in order for quality, not quantity, so the fact that your follies are smaller actually is fine in my mind. they will grow! And I'm glad that your estrogen level is higher because hopefully, that means your lining is nice and thick! 


Gozal, hug.gif I think YOU'RE a rock star! Just keep doing what you need to do. And even when down, i still think that you exhibit so much grace and you're always so kind to everyone on the thread. I just hope that this is your month!!


Chica, how are things going?


Brichole, YAH for a raise!!


Everyone else, how is everyone doing?


By the way, i LOVE camera talk!! Gozal, the other thing you may want to look into is buying a camera used. I know a few people who did that and love their camera and they got it for less than half the price. The priciest part of the dslr is not the body though...it's the lenses. not to mention, camera gear is addicting. When i first got started, I bought everything I could. Now, i've slowed down mostly because I realize I don't really use most of the things I thought I would need :o)  The other thing you can consider is buying a higher end point and shoot. I bought the Canon G12 which has the capability to set the camera to many more different settings than a regular point and shoot and you can learn a lot of the steps prior to upgrading to a dslr. The cameras are pricey (around 4-5 hundred) but I bought my G12 off of ebay for 280 or so. You can find really great deals on ebay for used products. it's a pity though...I prefer to use my dslr whenever I'm taking photos so the g12 definitely doesn't get as much use as I would like. I learned using books because i was too lazy to take a class and i'm looking forward to starting with photography again once work slows down!


Hope everyone is well!! i can't wait till this week is over!!

post #140 of 267

Thank you ladies for all of the congrats :)  I'm pretty excited about the whole thing!!! We found out our hours are going to change a little too.  1st shift will be 6-2 2nd shift is 2-10 and 3rd shift is 10-6.  We will see how all of that goes when the first of the year hits lol.  I hope that everything runs smoothly!!!


Boots: Just want to say congrats!!! And i understand how "unreal" it feels when you FINALLY get a BFP...hold tight, promise once you are finally able to see the baby you will rest a LITTLE easier :)  I didn't stop freaking out really until Emma got here when we got pregnant with her.


Renavoo:  HEY!! I haven't really talked directly to you in a while : )   I decided to share my story with you ladies because i didn't think i had ever really gone into depth on how everything went in my life with TTC.  It was a long and trying road to say the least :)


Shesaidboom:  I'm really pulling for your BFP on the 19th!! I really really hope that this cycle worked for you!!!


Deborah: I'm happy that you have been able to tell most of your extended family about the twins :)  I think your idea of telling the "world" is a great idea!!


Gozal:  Hope you're feeling better!!! I know that everything just seems to just get crazy when you're TTC and it keeps not working!!! I really hope that you can get your BFP this month too!!! WHat a wonderful christmas gift that would be hehe!!!


Cbaa:  HOpe that you are doing good too!!! I've still gotta go all the way thru the posts to catch up but wanted you to know i was thinking about you!!


Sourire:  How are you doing?  Feels like it's been a while since i've talked to you directly too!!!!



EVERYONE I MISSED:  Sorry if i missed anyone. I'm trying to do all of this by memory and this morning my memory is SHOT!!! I didn't sleep well last night, so i'm sorry for being forgetful this morning...i'll try to do better later after i've finished more reports that have to be in before the end of the month!!!


AFM:  I'm trying to take this cycle easy.  I've stopped temping for this month because all i do is stress myself out when i see the higher temps and then i get all depressed once AF shows up and they crash and burn!!! I am just going with the flow of things!! Me and DH are DTD at least every other day if not everyday just to make sure our time is covered if i do O this month...I'm trying to stay as positive as I can also, just to try to keep my stress levels down as much as possible.  Things have been crazy in our lives this month and we have SOOOOO much stuff going on this month with birthdays, christmas, and everything else.  I did figure up that I should be expecting AF either Christmas Eve or Christmas morning so i will probably keep a HPT in the bathroom so I can POAS on CHristmas morning if the witch is late showing up!!! I really hope she doesn't show up because this is probably our last time to try until after my surgery.  We will see though.  I might have to put my surgery off anyways because i will be getting new insurance and I still don't know what the new insurance will cover or what company it's thru.  I hope that it's a good company though because I would eventually like to at least go in and see my RE to see if there is anything that we can do to get us pregnant without having to do the injections (other than a trigger shot)  If i'm on 3rd shift again it will make it easier to be monitored though, but we will have to hurry the kids into bed at night so that we could DTD before i had to go to work at night.  BLAH, so much to plan IF we don't get our BFP this month...but surely the universe thinks we all deserve our BFPs before the end of the year!! We've all been good and delt with AF's evil face showing up month after month after month...i think it's about time we get something to show for our hard work and dedication!!! ANYWAYS, i'm about to start my reports so i will check in on you ladies later!!!

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Mothering › Mothering Forums › Pregnancy and Birth › Fertility › Infertility › ~ DECEMBER 2011 INFERTILITY ONE THREAD ~