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~ DECEMBER 2011 INFERTILITY ONE THREAD ~ - Page 10

post #181 of 267

Jukim, hope you have a short stay here, I did, but these ladies have been nothing but generous and supportive. It's truly amazing.

 

Had my first u/s today and saw a black dot. Still too early for anything else. In another two weeks we'll have another to hopefully hear the heartbeat.

 

I don't know why TTC so long has really affected my feelings about pregnancy. I was talking to my coworker today and she asked why I'm so nervous, since as far as I know, length of time TTC does not correlate with viability of pregnancy. I told her it's just been a looooong time being immersed in the struggle that some of us go through to procreate. I've seen so many people get pregnant, but also a lot of people lose babies, have failed fertility treatments, etc. It has changed me in a lot of ways. I think about other people and their secret struggles that you never see in real life a lot more. Hopefully this will wear off and I will be able to be more joyful and less worried. But I know it has deepened my empathy for others which is something I will carry with me always. I have been so inspired by the bravery of so many women who continue to pursue their dream of being mothers. I almost gave up many times but when I saw women who had had a lot of losses and tried even longer than we had still talking about hope, it carried me through.

 

xoxo

post #182 of 267

Boots, I know exactly what you mean. I have so many friends who make it seem like pregnancy is the easiest thing ever, but I know that when I am finally pregnant, I will be so nervous about everything. I think the struggle of infertility really introduces you to a hidden world that most women just don't talk about. Unless you have close friends who share about their struggles, or put yourself in a community that does, everything else seems like it is so frequently swept under the rug. Television and movies rarely give the right ratio of infertility/miscarriages--it's almost always a totally shocking surprise, or perfect fairy tale timing.

 

Speaking of TV, I'm a sucker for the show "Parenthood" and I do love that they included a plotline where one of the main couples discovers (after a good bit of trying) that they have next to nil odds of conceiving (even though they already have a daughter). The next few episodes move pretty quickly into them trying to adopt, but the entire storyline has been pretty realistic and definitely made me sob my eyes out when she loses it after telling her husband the news from the doctor.

 

Anyways, I think the good thing (for everyone) who has struggled with infertility and loss is that it gives you so much grace towards others and the struggles they're facing. It helps you learn not to assume, to be sensitive, and to be there for others when they are going through something similar. It also seems like it will help you appreciate your children (and being a mom) more, because it's something you waited so long for, and wanted so deeply.

 

Whew! Sorry, didn't mean to write a book. :) And it must have been so exciting to see something on your first US, even if it was just a dot! I hope these next two weeks pass by quickly so you can see that heartbeat (and hopefully feel a little relief from some of the worry).

 

Brichole, you seriously crack me up! I always enjoy reading your posts. :) I will definitely be thinking of you on Sunday--in fact, I will be thinking of all of you during the holiday season. It's always just so much harder, especially as others announce things, or you are badgered by nosy relatives, etc. It's a difficult time, and I hope everyone is able to stay busy and enjoy spending time with their significant others. Oh--so do you think you O'd? Were you able to get any BDing in tonight? Also, can someone fill me in on the whole pineapple core thing? I know that eating it right after ovulation is supposed to help with implantation, etc, but how do you get it--do you buy a whole pineapple and carve it out? Do you chop it up, blend it, etc? I guess I don't really know the best way to go about the whole process!
 

cbaa, dang, something must be in the air! Everyone is O'ing! So you're going the "natural" way tonight, then still going in for the IUI? I feel like that should double your chances, right? ;) Even though I'm sure it feels a bit ironic, it certainly can't hurt! Good luck tomorrow, I hope it's quick and not too difficult. 

 

Gozalhug2.gif sending encouraging thoughts your way. I hope you're able to rest a bit and spend some time relaxing and not thinking about TTC. BFNs are bad enough as it is, but even harder when you're trying something new and had hopes that it would only take once. I haven't done any medicated cycles (well, other than just taking the Met), but I know it has to be so rough (plus, who knows how the drugs have affected your emotions as well). We'll be thinking of you, and hoping that after a little down time, this next cycle will be unexpectedly easy (and productive)!

 

Jukim, welcome! Good luck during your 2ww--this is such an encouraging board, and hopefully you won't be here very long! 

 

Monkey, I have to admit--I am pretty darn bummed about not being with you in the August DDC (or having similar DDs). It definitely would have been fun! I'm glad things are going well. Who knows, maybe your morning sickness will be limited and not very intense. I know a number of people who just didn't have it much as a symptom, so maybe you'll be one of those lucky ladies!  Glad to hear the twins are doing okay! It must have been so hard to keep your news from your brother--when do you think you'll tell them? I know you may have mentioned it before, but afte reading a number of different updates on when people were telling who, I might be a bit mixed up.

 

Deborah, those pics are amazing! So nice to think that they're hanging out together from the very beginning. How many more weeks until you find out the sex? The name Taryn Ash is really fun, btw.

 

Sourire, girl, I am right there with you the skinny thing. I'm consistently between 103-106, at 5'3", and have been petite my whole life. It runs on my dad's side, and I've done every possible thing to try and gain weight, but it never works. Now that they've diagnosed me as Insulin Resistant, I'm supposed to go very low sugar, and I'm scared it will have me losing weight (which is not good). Belly bulges are the worst, though, no matter what size you are--it just always feels miserable (well, unless you're pregnant, I'd imagine, but even then it seems like it's a struggle to be okay with having the bulge). Maybe you can give cruches a try? If you are on the lean side, it doesn't usually take long to see some results. I used to do 25 crunches/25 "cherry pickers" (where you stay flat on your back and move your legs up and down)/25 more crunches, in the morning and before bed, and it really helped define my stomach. I've slacked off though--exercising is at the top of my list, come New Years!

 

Gemmine, O'ing tomorrow! Yay! Hope you've been able to get lots of bd-ing in. :) 

 

Also, I second your suggestion: renavoo, deborah, monkey, boots--you should definitely start a graduates thread! I think that would be awesome. 

 

 

So...I'm actually feeling pretty okay. I definitely didn't expect to feel as optimistic (or as upbeat) as I do right now, but here I am. Thanks so much for all the thoughts and encouragement. It really helped and definitely made me feel better. Monday was awful, between the combination of my first period in four-ish months (helloooo hormones) and the concrete truth that my pregnancy bubble for the month was burst. Looking back at the tests again (I kept them all), and seeing the fade to darker and then lighter again, made me so sad. The realization that I had finally actually been pregnant, and now I'm not, was pretty painful. It was so early, though, and I think the biggest thing I was really mourning was the pregnancy itself (the daydreams I'd had about sharing with DH, our families, the way the 9 months would go, etc.). I hadn't let myself get to the point where I felt like I actually was connecting the pregnancy to a baby (I think it's hard for me to do that at the very beginning), which is a good thing. But I did have to let go of the expectations that had started to build, and of the way I saw things happening. Instead, my year will be different (but hopefully still wonderful, and still pregnant at some point!).

 

I'm so glad I waited to tell DH -- I told him Monday, afterwards, and he was so sweet and understanding. He was also really encouraging, and I think it just really struck him that we could actually have a baby this year. He's ready to get down to business this month (haha, as I'm sure he always is). ;)

 

One thing I'm really unsure about is what my cycle will be like this month. My OB/GYN said that she was very encouraged that I ovulated, and to keep going with what I've been doing. I've never had a normal cycle though, so I'm going try and be really diligent about tracking my temps and CM. I think once I hit CD 11 or so, we'll just try to BD at least every other day, and I'll start doing OPKs around CD 13. If I do have a more "textbook" cycle, I'll O right around Christmas, which is a great time to get lots of BDing done! I feel a bit helpless now though--just back in the boring part of the cycle. I am trying to be careful with what I eat, etc, and really take the cleansing thoughts from this cycle and apply them to every aspect of my life. I want to give this month a real fresh start in every manner I can.

 

Oh--the other thing that extra bummed me out is that I had to place a new order of pregnancy tests on Amazon yesterday. My best friend and I laughed and laughed a year ago when I ordered 50 because it was so cheap. Surely I'd never use them all! I must be crazy! Maybe I could pass them around for years to other friends! ... Nope. They're all gone. And now I had to order more. Who woulda thought?

 

post #183 of 267

sourire - thanks for the reassurance with the tylenol. I tend to avoid medication as well. We definitely are cycle buddies! It will be great to have some hand holding in this thread while we get through the next week!

 

gozal - I`m so very sorry. I completely understand why you need to take a break. Thinking of you.

deborah - hello little ones! Thanks for sharing your pictures.
Also, I love the name Taryn. That`s actually a name I`ve had on the top of my list since I had a camper named that when I was 16, but Dp has an ex named Taryn so he doesn`t want to use it. Taryn Ash Kelly is a beautiful name! Dh and I have had our top girl and boy names picked out for years. I'm hoping we'll get to use one of them soon!

 

cbaa - thinking good thoughts for your IUI! I'm hoping that the BD-ing works, and if not, the IUI catches that eggie.

 

monkey - I still haven`t seen BC in person, but I really want to as well. It looks absolutely gorgeous. I definitely think it`s your turn for a splurge!
I have a wedding dress already and it`s not maternity, but it`s almost an empire bodice so it`d be easy to bring it up a bit to accomodate a belly. There`s also extra room in the boobs, which I`m going to leave until I find out how much these ladies grow!
With things like the queasiness, you can be greatful it`s there so you know things are going well, but unhappy because it sucks to go through it!
I`m glad the twin was okay! What a stressful situation that must have been.

 

jukim - welcome! I hope you get your BFP soon and that we`re able to offer support while you wait to find out.

 

brichole - I`m 10 dpo now. Thank goodness! I`m so tempted to test, but I think I`m going to hold out until Monday. I`ve got a couple distractions planned for this weekend, so hopefully it won`t be too bad. I am hoping that both of us do have a baby in the belly by the new year!
Happy birthday to your DD!

 

bootsvalentine - dealing with infertility does change people, and I think you're right about the empathy part. I think once you hit that 12 week mark you may feel a lot better and will begin to relax. Can you take some time just for you to do something you love or something that's very relaxing? It may at least give you a little break from the worrying.

 

 

AFM, 10 dpo and wanting to test, I do, but I'm waiting. Monday isn't too far off, right? I'm still getting pain and cramping, but it's not as constant or intense. Maybe TMI and a little weird, but it's now cramping/hurting inside and around my vagina. I'm worried about that because the only other time I've experienced this type of pain was during a miscarriage. I was a lot further along, but it's still worrisome. I'm hoping it's just part of the getting pregnant deal and we're still good.

I'm sort of thinking that if we don't get our BFP this month, we might take a little break. I think next cycle is out anyway because the clinic will be closed for the holidays during what would be my monitoring/IUI days, so that might be enough, but this has been a lot more emotionally and physically draining than I thought it would be. I am just exhausted and if we don't get a BFP, I know I'm going to feel like we have done all of this for nothing so far. I know that isn't true, and it will all be worth it when we do finally get our BFP, but it's hard to see that way. I think my perception is a little skewed though. We've only done two medicated (with anything more than Metformin) cycles, which comparatively is nothing. Come Spring, we will have been TTC for five years though, and as positive as I try to be about things, it really does feel hopeless at times. Of course, that could just be the Progesterone talking!

post #184 of 267

Thanks for all the welcomes. You guys are great. Although I am not as long trying my fears and concerns of having a long TTC journey are real and you guys have given me so much insight and courage to not give up if my journey turns out to be long. It's also helped me to truly see, know and understand the real struggles others have. I hope that you ladies will always be encouraged and that each day will always be better than the last. I also hope that the long wait will be over for all of you by the start of 2012. It's natural to want to give birth, it is one of the reasons we were created and it sucks when your body doesn't seem to want to do what it's supposed do.

 

As for me, I would think a FRER would at least show a faint positive by now but it hasn't so I think I'll just focus on expecting AF now. I've just started my journey so I won't be bogged down as I will always keep you ladies in my prayers who've been waiting for such a long time.

 

hug2.gif

post #185 of 267

Okay, so I just read a whole bunch of stuff and my preggo brain might not have absorbed it all. So, I'll answer the couple of questions I gleaned out of all of that. We have 8-10 weeks until we find out gender (16-18 weeks is when one can usually find out). I'm thinking maybe of letting DH pick out a few top names for the other twin and hoping I can stand one of them and letting that be the second name (assuming he agrees to Taryn Ash). I do know that I/we would like the middle name to start with a J or be connected with some part of DH's mom's personality (she passed in 8/2010) (definitely if they are girls and hopefully something will work if they are boys).  Taryn might cover it given that it means "of the earth" and she was very much into connecting with nature, so we might not need to do that with the second name. I would like to keep the names secret from our families, but I'm not a very good secret keeper, so we'll see.

post #186 of 267

P.S. Next ultrasound is Thursday and then I "graduate" to my OB for everything but hormone monitoring (which the RE will still do).

post #187 of 267

Deborah:  I'm not a very good secret keeper either lol...i am having a REALLY hard time hiding what DH is getting for christmas from him lol. 

 

Shesaidboom:  YAY for being 10dpo!!! I hope that everything keeps going well and i hope that you have a baby growing inside your uterus at this time :) HEHE!!! THe things that amuse me when TTC!!! LOL

 

Cbaa: I was actually wondering why they had you trigger so early without doing an IUI before today at 10am!!! That just about blew my mind! I Hope your BD session last night was successful and i hope that the iui today is just a back up to make sure everything gets where it needs to go :)  You deserve a BFP this cycle!!!!

 

Chicajones:  I try to just be as positive as possible even when things don't seem to be going my way : )  and humor is a way i deal with stressful situations!!!!  I am happy to see you upbeat!!! I hope that this next cycle works for you!! It would be wonderful to get a BFP at the first of the year!!!

 

AFM:  I am so tired today and yet Emma still let me sleep in this morning.  I got in from work last night at about 1040 and shaved my legs and got in one last BD before I feel our chances of TTC are over for the month.  We will still probably keep BDing the rest of the month just incase i didn't ovulate last night and my O date still has to come...but i really think that i did O last night though.  I am going to go get my pineapple this afternoon before i head to work.  I really hope that that helps me this month.  There are so many women who have had luck with it and i'm praying that I will!!! I think DH is finally done listening to my family so we r both on board for TTC #3 again finally!!!! Last night was one of the first nights he didn't insist that i jump up out of bed after DTD....so that was a plus for me : )  Well, Emma has another Ear infection and isn't in a great mood right now i'll finish catching up with everyone this afternoon once i get to work and have a little more time on my hands : ) Thank you ladies for always being there to listen to me BTW!!! You are the best group of women ever!!!

post #188 of 267

Deborah - I told everybody DS's name before he was born, and people actually were kinda rude about it, "your naming him THAT?", or laughing like we were not seruous. Its not like he has a really weird name either, it is actually pretty mainstream. I don't know if it is just people around me, but people do seem to be a little more likely to do that kind of stuff before the child is born, then when you tell them what a already-born kid's name is. So next time, I am not telling anybody until the birth.

post #189 of 267

RCR-That's exactly what I am worried about, which is why I want to keep the names underwraps.

post #190 of 267

Wowwww... it is hard to keep up with this thread these days!

 

deborah - Taryn is my older brother's ex-GF, so I could definitely never use that name! I tend to think of it more as a girl's name for that reason, too, but I know it's also the name of the male hero in Lloyd Alexander's books, so I could see it that way, too. Other than those two instances, I don't think I've ever heard of/known of any other Taryns. Hopefully your dh likes it, too!

 

cbaa - Sorry the timing is so stressful! I'm assuming your dh has a good sperm count, since I think you've mentioned BDing and doing IUIs together before? At least you have a way to cover all your bases!

 

boots - hug.gif I'm totally with you about IF changing the way I view my pregnancy. I still tend to think, in my heart of hearts, that everything is fine, but I can't let go of the fact that I know that a lot of times things are not fine for someone this early in pregnancy. Since I've been hanging out on the TTC boards for over a year, and on Mothering in general for far longer than that, I have seen a ton of early miscarriages, and also seen mamas who've had miscarriages/stillbirths at basically every phase of the pregnancy journey. So there's definitely part of my brain that knows that no point is ever "safe." There's never a point after which you are guaranteed and healthy (or even living) baby. I think someone who doesn't spend as much time living in the TTC world (or stalking other pregnant ladies, since they aren't pregnant themselves) just doesn't have that same perspective. And yeah, there's definitely a part of me that thinks, it was so hard to get pregnant, surely staying pregnant is not going to be that easy. And for me personally, I think I'm still affected by my SIL's early miscarriage of her first. I know it's ridiculous, and has no basis in fact, but I can't help but think, well, first pregnancies just end in miscarriage. But I also think you're right about the up side of this all - I do feel like I have a lot more compassion for people who are struggling with IF than I ever would have had if I hadn't been there myself. I definitely try to be more aware of the fact that you can't always see all of a person's struggles just by looking. For me, I've also felt like it's important to share my struggles with people around me, so that I can try to raise awareness about IF. I know a lot of people don't feel comfortable with sharing, so I feel like it's extra important for me to share, just so people know that it's out there, and that it something that happens to people they know, and that there are ways they can be supportive of those who are struggling. Also, I find that I occasionally find out that someone else has been struggling with IF, and was afraid to talk about it until I brought it up. So then I find buddies. :) I hope it does bring you some peace in a couple of weeks to see that little heartbeat!

 

chicajones - I'm definitely bummed not to have you in our DDC any more, too! And I was talking to dh last night, and told him it was hard, but I hadn't told my brother and he was like, "Why not?" Arrrghh!! Miscommunications! Apparently (at least according to him, last night), he is fine with whenever I choose to tell people, and he's just waiting for me to tell people before he starts telling people, but I can tell people whenever. That is definitely not the message I got from him a few days earlier. Anyway, we are planning to tell the family at Christmas, which is pretty much as soon as we get home. (Only a week till home, yay!) I think part of me wanting to tell people now is I'm starting to feel pregnant, and I want to talk to my mom and SIL and other people who've BTDT. MDC is great for that, but it's just not the same as bonding with the real-life women I love. I'm glad your dh is being understanding with you, and I hope this next cycle works out. I've heard cycles can be pretty wonky after a miscarriage/chemical pregnancy, but also that sometimes you're extra-fertile, so I hope that's the case with you!

 

shesaidboom - Monday isn't too far off, but you could probably get your BFP on Saturday and spend the weekend celebrating. winky.gif I know, I'm a bad influence. I really think you should do whatever you're comfortable with, but I'll be waiting on the edge of my seat for the result either way. Glad your wedding dress is adaptable! I am coming to terms with the fact that I will probably never, ever fit in my wedding dress again. It was pretty tight on the wedding day, and I've done nothing but get bigger since that day. greensad.gif And with this baby, I'm guessing that all chances are gone. But I would much rather have a baby and never fit in my wedding dress again than never have children and always fit in my dress! I would love to have a daughter wear my dress, since I think it's beautiful, but she'll probably think it's ridiculously out-of-date and silly-looking. orngtongue.gif

 

brichole - Fingers crossed for you!

 

rcr - ITA - people are way more likely to make rude comments before the baby comes than after he/she is born, which is another reason my names are secret. That, and I don't want them "stolen"!

 

AFM, I think today is going a little better. One step at a time!

post #191 of 267

Ugh! Today was such a down day greensad.gif  . I allowed myself to become very emotional just thinking about and reading up all the research about all the possibilities of difficulties with TTC, miscarriages, still births and birth defects due to my hyperthyroid condition. I almost cried but I took a walk. Maybe it was just PMS making me emotional but I can't do that to myself again, I might actually stress myself out of conceiving. So I'll stick to reading the happy endings and encouraging words on the threads on this site. Can't seem to reach my endocrinologist's office for advice however. Hope I reach him tomorrow.

 

I think keeping names secret is a better way to go. No need for any discouragement at this stage. The name has a beautiful meaning btw which will be reflected in the personality of the baby. I think there is much more to a name than just that. It speaks alot about the character of a person in most instances.

 

Deborah I'm excited for your upcoming graduation to your OB.thumb.gif

post #192 of 267

Thanks Jukim! I'm having a bit of a rough day today too. My RE wants me to get a flu shot and I plan on getting one but I don't really feel comfortable doing it in my first trimester. DH wants me to get one too actually (and now). She said any time in pregnancy is fine, but I still have reservations. I called the nurse line to try to get some more clarity and all they did was make me feel bad for questioning a doctor's recommendation. Ugh.

post #193 of 267

I'm supposed to take a final today and I was crying all morning over it. I feel like it's a damned-if-you-do, damned-if-you-don't situation. I also have asthma so I have an extra risk factor.

post #194 of 267

I decided to go ahead and get it. I figure my stressing about it is probably worse for the babies than getting it. Also, DH is pretty adamant and we don't want to upset him :-). Keep me in your thoughts for a good ultrasound post-flu shot (I have my next ultrasound next Thursday). Also, got to have a lovely allergic reaction to Estradiol patches. Not a great day today.

post #195 of 267

Deborah:  BIG HUGS!!! I'm so sorry that you have had such a rough day!!! It's no fun when you hav eto make choices in life that you never know the out come to until after it's happened.  Im hoping for everything to be okay for you and the babies!!! It also sucks that you had a reaction to your patch!!! You know you really do deserve a LOT of pampering for everything you have gone through this year!!!!

 

Monkey:  So happy you are having a little bit better day today!!  I know you will feel MUCH better about this baby once you are able to get in to see a doctor. 

 

Shesaidboom:  I didn't get a chance to say this earlier but thank you for wishing DD a happy birthday :)  She had a pretty good day i believe...probably would of been better had she not had to go to school...but then again she was excited that she got to be the class leader and got a birthday crown and got to get 2 prizes out of the prize chest at the end of the day...so i don't think it was a bad day for her at all!!!!

 

AFM:  I didn't get a chance to go by and get a pineapple today before work and DH said he's too tired to get out  tonight with emma to go get me one so i might just suck it up and stop by wal-mart on the way home from work.  I know that it's not going to be as good as one from our "natural" food store but it will do i'm sure!!! I just hope i can get to the core without killing myself tonight lol.  I'm also going to try to get DH to wake up to get another BD in tonight!! We honestly don't get to spend much "mommy daddy time" as we call it, when we have both of the girls at the house and Jayde will be home from her dad's this weekend!!! Don't get me wrong i LOVE LOVE LOVE my kids, but it puts a damper on the love life and the baby making when we have an open door policy in our house with our kids, if they need us they can come and knock on our door or if it's open they can just come on in...and i'm not exactly a quiet person and neither is DH when we really get into it and get distracted lol. (sorry TMI lol) Hope everyone has a great weekend!!!  Looking forward to hearing some good things this weekend/early next week!!!

 

Also, to Gozal  I will take over January's thread if you would like me to.  I know that you have a lot going on right now...and if no one else is interested in taking over i don't mind at all  :)

 

 

post #196 of 267

Thanks! Maybe I should remind DH that he should pamper me (especially since he was a big part of the reason I made the decision to get the shot). On the plus side I have a couple of weeks off school (starting in about 1/2 an hour when I finish my final). Having a cloudy brain so I decided to take a little break.

post #197 of 267

Looonnnnnnggggg day.

 and not pregnant.  

 

 

 

 

 

post #198 of 267

Sorry Skeemama. AFM- Done with class until 1/2! I know I did pretty well. Also, after all that debating, DH came home extra tired and I'm suspicious he's sick, so I think I better go ahead and get that shot. He claims he's not sick, but I don't believe him.

post #199 of 267

Welcome Jukim! I hope that we can help you through your journey! I've found that reading too much gets too scary (although I still can't help myself either). However, I definitely think sticking with the encouraging words and thoughts is the way to go and I am excited that we will help you on your way to a BFP!

 

Skeemama, oh no. I'm so sorry. hug2.gif

 

Brichole, I was reading that pineapples are one of the fruits where it doesn't matter if it is organic. So eat up on the pineapple core! Hope you didn't have too much trouble! haha DH doesn't let me near sharp knives because I'm so clumsy so he cut all the pineapples himself. ;o) As for BDing, hope you got in some great loving!

 

Monkey and Boots, I'm with you about still feeling scared, even as the first trimester ends. I have been traveling and yesterday, right before i hopped on a plane to come home, I noticed some spotting. I'm really happy I have an appointment today but I have a feeling that i'm going to be grounded for the rest of the pregnancy. I don't care...I hate traveling anyway. But i'm worried about what that means for my job. I hope you two are feeling well!! It gets better day by day. Soon, we'll be in the 2nd trimester and living up the golden time in pregnancy.

:o)

 

Shesaidboom, ARGH, I can't wait! hahaha. Seriously, it's nice to have a busy weekend to take your mind off of it so you go have fun and we'll be waiting anxiously on Monday for news.

 

Ok, Sorry I'm being so short about this, especially since I've been MIA. It's been such an exhaustingly busy week and I just got back from a cross country business trip. I'm just excited that i'm home and i'm hopeful that the rest of the year will be less busy than the last 2 months have been. Anyway, I just wanted you all to know that i was thinking of you even if i don't sign on as much!

 

Big hugs!

 

 

 

post #200 of 267

jukim - yours words are so true, thank you for sharing. I hope that you too get your BFP very, very soon. What dpo are you now? Maybe there is still a chance. Praying for you.
I'm sorry today was so hard. I think it's both good and bad that so much information is easily available to us online. I think a lot times a worst case scenerio is presented to us and it's hard to not take that at face value. You could have all of those problems, but it's more likely you will only have a few, or none at all. I hope talking with your endocrinologist will help ease your mind, or at least open some options up to you.

 

deborah - I'm awful with secrets too. I would definitely have a hard time keeping names secret, but like you, I'd be worried that everyone would want to chime in with their opinion "before it's too late".
I'm sorry your day was so rough. I definitely think stress doesn't help any, so it's good you went ahead and did what would keep your mind off it. Thinking good thoughts for your ultrasound!!

 

brichole - Thank you! I hope there is a baby growing right now :)
I'm so glad DH is on board for TTC! I also hope that Emma feels better quickly. Ear infections can be so painful.

 

rcr - that's awful that people were rude to you with ds's name! I've heard similar from others though, who then decide to keep the next child's name a secret. People always have opinions, even though what matters is that YOU like the name, not them!

 

monkey - I'm half thinking of going out tonight to get a test for tomorrow. I think a BFP would show by tomorrow, but the problem will be if it's negative. Sometimes I think it's nice to be holding on to that tiny bit of a chance, but other times I really just want to know and get it over with.
I think the baby will be very worth not fitting into the dress again, but I do understand the feeling.
I'm glad today is going better!

 

skeemama - I'm so sorry hug2.gif

 

renavoo - I'm glad you're in for a nice break after a busy 2 months! I can't wait anymore either, but I think I'm too scared to test.

 

 

AFM, I am seriously going back and forth between testing before Monday and not testing. I know it's really less than three more days, but I really do want to know. I kind of want to go out tonight to grab a test for tomorrow morning (if you count from the first IUI I'm really 12 dpo today, BUT since my follicles were bigger on the day of the second IUI, I'm assuming I did not ovulate then). I should really just suck it up and wait. If I had any tests in the house, I bet I would have gone through all of them by now.

I'm going to get a little TMI for a moment. I don't know if this is because of the progesterone suppositories or if it's one of the pretend pregnancy symptoms they cause, but I'm getting some pain inside my vagina. I'm not too worried since it really isn't bad yet, it's really just annoying. Has anyone else ever experienced that from progesterone?

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Mothering › Mothering Forums › Pregnancy and Birth › Fertility › Infertility › ~ DECEMBER 2011 INFERTILITY ONE THREAD ~