Breastfeeding, etc. - Page 7 « Back to Group Discussions

[jbk21]

Yup- 6 weeks is the magic number for a lot of developmental issues.  Once they're over that hump it seems to get much better very quickly.

Originally Posted by dashley111 

Ok I have never heard this but I hope to God its true!  Bettie is just so cranky...of my 3, she cries the most and needs the most one-on-one attention.  We walk the floor for 3-4 hours a night to keep her content.  She smiles at us every once in a while, and it reminds me its worth it.

Owen wouldn't take it until 7 weeks old- he would act like he was choking on it too, but once he got the hang of it he was HOOKED.  Lol.  Dylan took to it much earlier- he actually never acted like he was gagging, so maybe it's just a tongue issue?  Or perhaps a different size/shape of paci would work better?  If she doesn't take it now just try again in a few weeks if she still acts like she wants to suck. 
 

Originally Posted by Abraisme 

Speaking of pacifiers..  Is there some magical way to get a baby to take one?  I'm on baby #3 and so far they've all acted like I'm choking them with the plastic death thing.  Do babies that use paci's just take them from the beginning or do you have to keep trying?  My first 2 kids are really NOT oral, so maybe they just didn't it?  Coralie is fussy in the evenings and wants to suck, but is too full and it seems to hurt her.  She still doesn't want to take the paci for more than 1-2 sucks though...

[Jaimee]

I kept offering a paci to both my kids, but neither took it for longer than a few minutes and mostly just used to for gumming/chewing on.  I think some kids are willing and others aren't, but if you would like them to take it, keep trying b/c every week is different.  My dad told me the rather troubling story of how they used to dunk our pacifiers in salad dressing to get my sister and I to take one.  Sigh...

[seraf]

Bird happy, they're right, you need to meet your own needs as well. But you're also right, you can nurse her as much as she wants. I mean, there is a reason we let down when we hear them cry. Our bodies expect to nurse them. Sometimes we might have to bounce and jiggle them to get other things done but you don't have to leave her to cry for long periods just because the clock says she isn't supposed to nurse yet. I have oversupply so if I think he wants to suck for comfort I offer the dryer side. 

I don't know about the SIDS pacifier thing. If a baby has free access to a breast all night, which seems more likely biologically, that is not going to offer protection from SIDS but a bink will?  Seems off to me. 

Neither of my older kids would take a bink. Shay can't figure it out, but he will happily lick one in the car when nursing is unavailable. I think it's a combination of luck and magic. Maybe the kids who won't take them are just working toward a career as food critics. 

[jbk21]

re: sids and pacifier- research shows significantly fewer deaths from SIDS (some studies show a 92% decreased chance)  Here's a study: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/21505778  - note: even when the infant is sleeping in soft bedding.  Pretty remarkable.  

They aren't sure *how* it does it, just that it has a significant effect.  

Breastfed babies also have a significantly lower SIDS risk, so it's not like breastfeeding *doesn't* offer protection but pacifiers do. They BOTH do.  

[Jaimee]

Joanie... you've gotten a lot of great responses as usual, so I'm just going to throw in some more encouragement.  You simply cannot spoil a baby.  She communicates a need and you meet it, that's what parenting is about.  If you read books like The Happiest Baby on the Block or The Continuum Concept or even sections of several of the Dr. Sears books, you'll see that expectations of infants to fall into patterns (nurse every 3 hours, sleep through the night by 4 months, etc.) are largely constructs of western culture.  They are expectations that baby should fit into our schedules instead of us rearranging our schedules to fit baby's needs.  In cultures where these expectations are not put on babies, those babies magically do not experience colic.  Why?  Because mothers there are expected to attend to baby's needs immediately, night and day, and they are supported in this job by their culture.  These cultures also understand that a baby should never be left to cry it out.  Of course, this more intensive kind of parenting is not easy and it's not well supported in our culture, so it can feel overwhelming.  When it reaches this overwhelming point it is paramount that you seek help and find ways to restore balance to your routine.  Getting together with like-minded parents is an excellent way to get help, support, and advice.  While MDC can offer virtual support, all moms need IRL support as well.

My first nursed pretty much every 30-60 minutes during the day and every 90 minutes at night for the first 2 years of her life.  It was quite the adjustment for me to realize that she wasn't going to fall into the "typical" pattern that other babies seemed to have.  It felt like I never got a break- she'd finish up nursing and then I'd have to hold her- she wouldn't let me put her down either- and then it was back to nursing again.  But things absolutely do change and when she found her fingers around 4 months old, that helped some.  Also when I realized that there are other types of carriers out there besides the pouch sling (which she hated) I found that carrying could lengthen the amount of time between nursing sessions.  But it's really important to keep in mind that you haven't even hit that 6 week mark yet.  Your milk is still regulating and she is still figuring out how to nurse.  Once your breastfeeding relationship is well established you may find that she is so efficient that she can get what she needs quickly and doesn't need to nurse again for a while.  And this is just a blip in the big scheme of things... in just a few short months she'll be sitting up, then crawling, then eating solids, then walking, talking, etc.  So much will change in a relatively quick period of time and this newborn period of intense physical needs will be a memory.
 

Originally Posted by seraf 
Neither of my older kids would take a bink. Shay can't figure it out, but he will happily lick one in the car when nursing is unavailable. I think it's a combination of luck and magic. Maybe the kids who won't take them are just working toward a career as food critics. 

  This cracked me up!  But I will say that my children all have intense oral needs and all three have found their fingers/thumbs and learned to soothe themselves.  Dd was the slowest at 4 months.  Ds1 figured it out by about 2 months, and Avery just found his thumb today, though it will take some more time for him to reliably be able to get it in his mouth and keep it there.  But it's been my experience that fingers are way better than pacis since they can't get lost and the child can put them back in.  Yes, we'll need to deal with them breaking the habit at a later age, but I much prefer this than dealing with weaning from a paci. 
 

[jbk21]

I agree!  I know most resources say pacis are better because you can take them away, but I wish my kids were thumb suckers.  At least they can put a thumb back in their mouth without help.  The trifecta of being able to remember that a paci is there (object permanence), be able to find it, and also then put it in their mouth is too far off.... (likely around a year old)  In the meantime I have to replace it..... UGH.  

Originally Posted by Jaimee 
But it's been my experience that fingers are way better than pacis since they can't get lost and the child can put them back in.  Yes, we'll need to deal with them breaking the habit at a later age, but I much prefer this than dealing with weaning from a paci.  

[dashley111]

Originally Posted by Jaimee 

But it's been my experience that fingers are way better than pacis since they can't get lost and the child can put them back in.  Yes, we'll need to deal with them breaking the habit at a later age, but I much prefer this than dealing with weaning from a paci. 

Me and DH just got our older DD to quit sucking her thumb at the age of 5.  We weighed pros/cons and could not come up with which habit we would rather harbor if we had to harbor a habit.  In the end binky won just out of sheer exhaustion and my need to be able to parent  children when he went back to work.  That, and the fact that both girls have a pretty big genetic over-bite already and thumb sucking did not help DD1 with it at all.

[Paigekitten]

I keep trying to give Éowyn a pacifier in the car and she just screams harder.  I'm still hoping she'll take up thumb sucking.  My second sucked her thumb and it made things SO EASY.

[CDsMom1031]

Originally Posted by jbk21 

I know we keep saying this but... it's going to get better SO soon, Joanie!!  6 weeks is the peak of most of these issues- babies are increasingly fussy up to 6 weeks and then it gets better, and they also organize their sleep better after 6 weeks.  So just hang in there, do what you need to do for the next 2 weeks and it will start to improve dramatically after that.  Plus she'll be smiling at you and starting to giggle a bit, and that makes it all better when you're having a rough day 

I can say this is true. My life was Hell from 4-6 weeks. Now, he's sleeping 5+ hours straight at night, nursing every 2-3, he lets me lay him down and he entertains himself (For short periods, but better than nothing), and he SMILES and COOS.

I also use a paci. He loves it. He's been using it since birth. I'm terrified to let him have his thumb because my brother sucked his untl he was 16 and my sister STILL does and she's almost 22. =/

[TalkToMeNow]

I wouldn't mind Jasper sucking his thumb, but he is not figuring that one out. I have the same situation as you, J, where he wants to suck but gets pissed with milk. He will take a pacifier, but acts like its disgusting at first. I just keep sticking it back in his mouth, and after a few tries he realizes it's good. I would really rather he just nurse, but it's out of my control. And yes, holding it for him gets really old.

[Mal85]

I don't know if Greta will end up a thumb sucker or not. She likes to just suck on anything that comes near her mouth. She's not really a comfort nurser though. Neither of my girls have been, I blame that on my forceful letdown. They get what they need and get outta there, lol! She has taken a pacifier since day one and is able to hold onto it really well by herself. I only have to give it back to her a couple of times overnight. She has accidentally found her thumb a handful of times and loooooves it when she gets it. So, we'll see. Personally, I'd rather she take a pacifier than suck her thumb. I have so many nieces and nephews that are thumb suckers and it seems that habit is much harder to break. Many of them do it well into their childhood years. I have 5.5 year old niece and nephew who are still sucking their thumbs. I have a niece who sucked hers until she was 8 and the only reason she stopped is because she had to get an appliance put in the roof of her mouth for orthodontics, so she couldn't suck her thumb anymore. But the ones who have taken a pacifier break the habit in their toddler years. 

[TalkToMeNow]

Originally Posted by Mal85 

I don't know if Greta will end up a thumb sucker or not. She likes to just suck on anything that comes near her mouth. She's not really a comfort nurser though. Neither of my girls have been, I blame that on my forceful letdown. They get what they need and get outta there, lol! She has taken a pacifier since day one and is able to hold onto it really well by herself. I only have to give it back to her a couple of times overnight. She has accidentally found her thumb a handful of times and loooooves it when she gets it. So, we'll see. Personally, I'd rather she take a pacifier than suck her thumb. I have so many nieces and nephews that are thumb suckers and it seems that habit is much harder to break. Many of them do it well into their childhood years. I have 5.5 year old niece and nephew who are still sucking their thumbs. I have a niece who sucked hers until she was 8 and the only reason she stopped is because she had to get an appliance put in the roof of her mouth for orthodontics, so she couldn't suck her thumb anymore. But the ones who have taken a pacifier break the habit in their toddler years. 

My brother had to get that to stop sucking his thumb. I think it's called a rake. It looked super uncomfortable, but he was 8 and his teeth were a mess. Of course, at the time I just teased him mercilessly. Oops...

[IwannaBanRN]

Neither of my older 2 were paci babies. They HATED pacifiers. Levi seems to think they are okay, though. I'd rather not give it to him much, though. I'd just like to use it on him in the newborn stage, until he can entertain himself. It's very convenient right now to just use it while I'm trying to take care of the older two if I'm trying to get Levi to sleep.

[CDsMom1031]

Question... I only feed Conner one side per feeding. So, when I pump, should I keep the bottles separate or combine them? The bottle's only like 2oz but that's one side and he only eats one side per feeding.... 2oz just seems like such a small amount. I go back to work Monday so I'm working on my backstock.

[IwannaBanRN]

I don't see any harm in combining them. They were in your body around the same time.

[Jaimee]

I always combine.  I've read that you can combine milk that you pump throughout one whole day- the next day use a new bottle.  So no matter which breast it comes from.  The only thing to consider is if you are making a bottle of just foremilk, which can cause an imbalance.   Lastly, when combining they suggest cooling the fresh milk before adding it to previously refrigerated milk.

[CDsMom1031]

I know that I CAN combine... But SHOULD I? Since he only eats off of one side per feeding... And I'm only pumping 2oz per side, is that how much he eats a feeding?

[jbk21]

you should combine.  he eats more than that per feeding probably.  babies are more efficient than the pump.  

[Abraisme]

Originally Posted by jbk21 

you should combine.  he eats more than that per feeding probably.  babies are more efficient than the pump.  

[CDsMom1031]

That's what I figured. I just pumped last night and was like, "O_o. I wonder if this is all he's eating. Were we overfeeding him when I was pumping for school?" LOL