Breastfeeding, etc. - Page 2 « Back to Group Discussions

[TalkToMeNow]

Joanie, you've gotten some good advice. I second trying other things first. Bouncing on the birth ball is great. Jasper falls asleep quickly in any carrier. He also does the pull-off the boob and cry a lot during nursing. I've figured out that he does not like there to be milk when he just wants to suck... It really pisses him off! I think he'd be happy if my breasts had an off switch. I feel so bad for him... I can tell he really wants to suck for comfort, but not breastfeed. Makes me feel bad, too. My girls loved to nurse for comfort.

He had a pacifier a lot in the first week because he was under the bili lights for days. He needed some way to be soothed. I wonder if now he knows there is another option and that's why he fusses so much when he doesn't want milk? I broke down last night and let him have a pacifier... Then I cried because I felt like a bad mom. Sigh. I want to meet his needs and I want to do things naturally. So confusing.

[TalkToMeNow]

Originally Posted by jbk21 

Another thing- this is SO WEIRD but our old pediatrician recommended this if they seem uncomfortable- she said they can't figure out the muscles they need to use to poop so she said to take a q-tip and put vaseline (yuck- maybe find a petro-free alternative) and rub it around their, uh, sphincter.  I KNOW IT'S WEIRD but my first son would almost IMMEDIATELY poop.  He really just needed those muscles "stimulated".  Now we just give a kind of vigorous wipe in that area.  Be ready for a mess though, for real. But it really seemed to help him to feel much more comfortable!

Yep! I've done this too! Can be very helpful.

[mamabelle]

Hang in there. Some of this reminds me of my first. It was so hard, I totally feel for you. It does get so much better, but it's impossible to have perspective at this point. My first nursed nonstop, around the clock for at least 4 months. I joined a breastfeeding support group, which helped a lot. Now that he is 2 and weaned, it's all a fuzzy memory. I am so glad I stuck with it for 21 months! It is much easier for me to remember how fast it all does go by this time, my mantra has been "this is all temporary."

I am gluten free, I am sorry to hear you are having trouble getting enough food! Big batches of gluten-free oatmeal cookies and other easy to grab snacks are helpful. And ask for help. If DH can't, is there someone else you can ask? This is a time that people are very willing to help, sometimes they just need to be asked for specific help (can you please come make me a big pot of soup?). I give people recipes I already have so I don't have to explain the off-limits ingredients repeatedly. Have someone slice up some apples and you can dip them in some peanut butter (unless you're avoiding that right now)...

<<<hugs>>>

Originally Posted by birdhappy85 

I need a pep talk.

I'm doubting my ability to keep up with breastfeeding more and more each day. It's bringing me down. I had the worst evening yet for like 6-7 hours unable to make the baby happy. From 5:00pm to midnight it's just so hard almost every night! I don't get it! She had her usual nighttime latching difficulties but on a grander scale and I broke down crying unable to take any more. I had to lay down in bed to have my meltdown and let things pass while DH held Sora crying for a bit. I felt like the worst mom ever. She was nursing for over an hour at a time(!) and doing the whole sucking/pull away/re-latch super painful thing she does. I couldn't have possibly had any milk left in me during most of the time she was nursing last night so I felt like a human pacifier! (someone else on here used that analogy and it unfortunately perfectly describes how I feel these days...) If she fell asleep and I tried handing her to DH or setting her down for a second, she woke up crying and would just nurse even more -- and repeat. I just don't get it! I don't think it's an engorgement issue causing the problem because I've tried letting out some milk before feeding her and it doesn't help. I've only gotten engorged once; my breasts feel the same at night as they do earlier in the day when she eats just fine. She does seem kind of frustrated like she wants to fall asleep but can't, though... Like she'll nod off and then wake right up like she's fighting to stay awake. Maybe that's a "competing" need that she's battling with while hungry. I don't think I ate enough yesterday either... Maybe my milk production slowed down at night. I don't have much of an appetite most of the time anymore. Eating just feels like too much work and I've ended up eating foods I shouldn't be with my food sensitivities. I feel guilty and run down, unable to dedicate any decent amount of time to preparing my GFCF meals. DH can only help so much. It takes a lot of effort and planning to keep up with that way of eating and I didn't know breastfeeding would be this much more frequent and difficult than the whole "newborns eat every 2 hours" crock of **** I was always told.

When do infants start eating faster and less frequently? Is this just a newborn phase that passes within a few weeks? My friend was over a few days ago with her 3-month-old baby and she said her baby eats her fill in 5 minutes. FIVE MINUTES! Apparently she's always been a fast eater. Jealousy doesn't even begin to describe how I was feeling in that moment...

I think tonight I'm going to try feeding Sora in different places around the house and really concentrate on the breastfeeding session between us without distractions. Maybe that will help. FX that she just wants my undivided attention. I do tend to try multitasking too much at night, especially since that's my only time with DH and we'll watch movies or TV together and I'll be on the laptop quite a bit. I mean, I hold the baby all the time while I'm doing that other stuff, but maybe she senses my focus isn't on her. I don't know.

[jbk21]

Originally Posted by TalkToMeNow 


Yep! I've done this too! Can be very helpful.

WHEW I was afraid it sounded like I was a freak.  Glad I'm not the only one, hahahaha 

[mamabelle]

This thread is full of good ideas! This baby is so different from my first. DS nursed nonstop, but at least I knew that nursing would always calm him. I have definitely been guilty of overfeeding this one, she has spit up often and fought the breast. Poor thing, I've finally started accepting that she has different and other needs! 

[IwannaBanRN]

Originally Posted by jbk21 

Another thing- this is SO WEIRD but our old pediatrician recommended this if they seem uncomfortable- she said they can't figure out the muscles they need to use to poop so she said to take a q-tip and put vaseline (yuck- maybe find a petro-free alternative) and rub it around their, uh, sphincter.  I KNOW IT'S WEIRD but my first son would almost IMMEDIATELY poop.  He really just needed those muscles "stimulated".  Now we just give a kind of vigorous wipe in that area.  Be ready for a mess though, for real. But it really seemed to help him to feel much more comfortable!

I've found that when I am cleaning Levi's bum, when I have to touch that area, it's almost immediately stimulated and he poops... on the clean diaper I'm putting on him

[EonJourney]

Question about nasal congestion- my 4.5 week old twins have severe nasal congestion at night which of course makes breast feeding challenging. Is this related to something I am eating? Would probiotics work? Any advice?

[Motivated Mama]

Originally Posted by EonJourney 

Question about nasal congestion- my 4.5 week old twins have severe nasal congestion at night which of course makes breast feeding challenging. Is this related to something I am eating? Would probiotics work? Any advice?

Maybe a humidifier in the room?

[IwannaBanRN]

Originally Posted by EonJourney 

Question about nasal congestion- my 4.5 week old twins have severe nasal congestion at night which of course makes breast feeding challenging. Is this related to something I am eating? Would probiotics work? Any advice?

DD had bad congestion our whole nursing relationship. But she also choked on my milk alot, which would go into her nasal passage. I just used the bulb syringe on her whenever she'd get plugged up.

[Abraisme]

I've done it too.  ;)
 

Originally Posted by jbk21 

WHEW I was afraid it sounded like I was a freak.  Glad I'm not the only one, hahahaha 

Birdie:  Everyone is right, just keep at it, it IS frustrating, which is very normal.  If you can make it past the 6w point it WILL GET EASIER and you'll always be proud of yourself for doing the right and best thing for your baby.  ::hugs::  I know what it's like to be walking the hall-way at night crying while my baby is crying because he just wanted to nurse but my nipples were too sore.  It did eventually  heal and he went on to nurse until he was 3yo.  I would have never forgiven myself for quiting, it just wasn't an option.  You can do it!

Edited by Abraisme - 12/5/11 at 11:01am

[Abraisme]

This is really pretty common.  Infants have very small nasal passages that tend to get clogged easily.  Both of my other children have had bad night-time nasal congestion until they were 7-8mo.  The only thing I've found that actually works is to let them sleep slightly elevated (think bouncy seat or wedge pillow) and to use saline and a snot sucker and push the saline through their nose neti-pot style.  Babies HATE it, but it works really well and then everyone gets sleep.  Saline in one nostril and out the other, with the baby's head tipped sideways.  I really don't think it's an allergy or that pro-biotics will help.  I think that it's dust and a tiny bit a mucus that gets stuck in their tiny noses and the only thing to do is clean it out.
 

Originally Posted by EonJourney 

Question about nasal congestion- my 4.5 week old twins have severe nasal congestion at night which of course makes breast feeding challenging. Is this related to something I am eating? Would probiotics work? Any advice?

[Motivated Mama]

Joanie - you can do this! I had a horrible breastfeeding experience with my first, but I am so glad I stuck it out. I agree that perhaps she has needs other than breastfeeding. I would read or watch videos about what Jack Newman has to say about compression. It's a good way to make sure your baby is eating while on the breast. If you know she's drinking, you won't feel so bad when you call it quits because she is coming on and off the nipple and then you can work on trying a different method, whether it be changing her, swaddling her, bouncing her, etc. I sit down and nurse for however long on one side, change her diaper if she falls asleep (during the day) then offer the other side. When she falls asleep there or comes off, I move on to the next thing. If it's dinner or something, I give her to DH or I swaddle her myself and bounce her until she is asleep, etc. I don't feel like I have to put her back to breast for a little while because I know she has gotten enough to eat. If she comes on and off the nipple, it's not nursing she needs; usually it's a changing, then nursing. I hope you can find it in you to stick this out! You will learn your baby and it will get better! We tend to blame ourselves and I think that's why so many women stop breastfeeding. If you weren't breastfeeding and you could see how much your baby is getting, you wouldn't offer the bottle every time she cries; you'd try other methods of comforting, right?

[IwannaBanRN]

Originally Posted by Abraisme 

This is really pretty common.  Infants have very small nasal passages that tend to get clogged easily.  Both of my other children have had bad night-time nasal congestion until they were 7-8mo.  The only thing I've found that actually works is to let them sleep slightly elevated (think bouncy seat or wedge pillow) and to use saline and a snot sucker and push the saline through their nose neti-pot style.  Babies HATE it, but it works really well and then everyone gets sleep.  Saline in one nostril and out the other, with the baby's head tipped sideways.  I really don't think it's an allergy or that pro-biotics will help.  I think that it's dust and a tiny bit a mucus that gets stuck in their tiny noses and the only thing to do is clean it out.
 

You don't even really need saline, do you? You could use breastmilk, yes?

[Abraisme]

Yes, I bet that would work and probably be a lot more gentle in the nose.  Totally worth trying!
 

Originally Posted by IwannaBanRN 

You don't even really need saline, do you? You could use breastmilk, yes?

[Jaimee]

Originally Posted by EonJourney 

Question about nasal congestion- my 4.5 week old twins have severe nasal congestion at night which of course makes breast feeding challenging. Is this related to something I am eating? Would probiotics work? Any advice?

Very common- especially this time of year when you probably have the heat on in the house.  A humidifier could be quite helpful, sleeping slightly elevated, saline spray or breastmilk in the nose and then suck out with the NoseFrida.  http://www.fridababy.com/  Totally worth ordering online ASAP.  I think that probiotics are helpful for so many things and don't hurt (unless there is an allergy to milk or soy that some probiotics contain).  So I certainly think that they are worth a try along with everything else.  I highly recommend Pharmax brand neonate HLC probiotics as they are human strain, do not contain allergens, and can be administered off the tip of your finger very easily.  I order from Professional Supplement Center.
 

[Jaimee]

Joanie... I think you've gotten some great advice and I don't really have anything to add but my support and encouragement that you CAN do this.  It WILL get better.  Seek support and try the many tips you've received.  Be gentle with yourself and while you're battling this challenge, let some other things go so that you can prioritize your breastfeeding relationship.  It is SO worth persevering.

[meesh933]

Originally Posted by Motivated Mama 

. If she comes on and off the nipple, it's not nursing she needs; usually it's a changing, then nursing.

 Any time my LO does that, if I change his diaper, he is immediately able to latch on with no issues. And it's only a problem in the middle of the night, like you were saying, Joanie. He roots around and fusses, but can;t find my nipple, and when he does, he doesn't want it. Once I wake up enough to realize the problem, and change him, he nurses right back to sleep.

[birdhappy85]

Thank you SO much, everyone, for the support and encouragement! Such great advice. I'm focusing on taking the breastfeeding one day at a time and trying to feel each day as another accomplishment in giving my baby the best nutrition I can offer. Yesterday went so well, it was like night and day, I don't want to get my hopes up that this will continue but it was so wonderful. She slept more than usual (probably tuckered out from the previous evening), seemed so relaxed, ate so well, and only had a brief 1-hour fussy time around 9pm. But then we went to bed early around 10:30pm and we got so much sleep until 6:00am! (with nursing and diaper changes in between of course) I took some suggestions from here and tried nursing her while gently bouncing on my exercise ball and also while walking around. She seemed to like that a lot and had a good latch at the angle I was at. It was so nice to see her eating so efficiently and being finished after just 20-30 minutes rather than sucking off and on and prolonging the feeding session. I also have been holding her upright to my chest more after some feedings when she seems squirmy and gassy. It seems to calm her a bit. I have noticed from the beginning that she doesn't latch if she has a dirty diaper so I've been very conscious of that for a while. She poops a lot more at night! Must be more food she's getting. I wonder how much of her contentedness yesterday was due to my eating much better and being more relaxed myself. I really pushed myself to eat well, GFCF and more frequently. DH is going to grocery shop today so I'll have more food to eat. He bought us a chest freezer we've been talking about getting for a while! I'm so excited to have that huge extra space to start filling with good foods!

I weighed her today and she's already up and over her birth weight at 12 days pp so I'm a proud mama! Funny how rewarding it is to feel like I'm growing this baby with breastmilk alone.

[jill the pill]

I have the same problem with letdown.  Try latching the baby on until letdown occurs then take them off and catch milk in a cloth.  Once the flow has slowed down some, put baby back on.  Leaning back also helps some by working against gravity.  I can't wait for my milk to regulate...my baby coughs and gags too but these things should help you in the meantime.

 

Originally Posted by Mal85 

It's been almost 5 weeks here and I only had a couple of days of uncomfortable engorgement right at first. Otherwise it's been pretty good. She just went through a growth spurt last week though and was attached to my boob non-stop for 2 or 3 days. I've definitely been producing more milk since then, but then she suddenly started sleeping a really long stretch at night, so I'm leaking like crazy in the middle of the night. I had to start sleeping with a bra on again so I could wear nursing pads. I'm really enjoying the 6 hour stretch of sleep, but my boobs are crazy full by morning. I've been nursing her on one side first thing in the morning then pumping the other side. I get about 3 oz pumping on just one side at a time, pretty successful if you ask me! I'm getting a pretty good stash in the freezer already for when I go back to work.

We gave her her first bottle just the other night and she took it from DH no problem. In fact, she seemed to tolerate it even better than the breast. I have a really forceful letdown on one side that she struggles to keep up with. Poor baby sputters and spits and chokes trying to keep up with it. I had the same letdown with my first, but she was a pro at keeping up with it. Greta would like to be a little lazier about eating and take her time with it, but this letdown just won't let her. Is there any way to help that or slow down my letdown some how?

[jbk21]

I'm finally finally finally feeling some improvement in my nipple soreness.  I haven't been diligent about putting on EMAB nipple butter and I'm sure if I was it would be even better.  But still, I'm glad there is a light at the end of the tunnel.  We still have some latch issues at night that I need to be better about fixing.  Overall though he is a really great nurser- he fills up and gives me a break for 2-3 hours.  No snacking, which is so great.