I'm not sure when to show (read to) our soon to be adopted 5 yo the good-bye letter we just received. She's had no physical contact with the bio mom since she was 3 and the last letter read to her was summertime. She has a hodgepodge of memories as she was moved from home to home and had several caregivers during those years. The biomom is mildly delusional and doesn't deal well with system boundaries. All of her (dfd's) memories are positive, though very mixed up as to who is who. The issue was neglect, by the way. We allowed her to keep all the letters she received (biomom sent many) in her room and only recently moved them since they were only being taken out as playthings that were thrown everywhere. She hasn't asked for them, but knows they're for her to see anytime she wants.
So, the question is whether we read this very loaded letter now, after the adoption, or until she starts asking more questions? She never asks about them anymore, but is fixated on the state where they've moved to (far from us). The letter repeatedly talks about how to get in touch with bio mom and bio dad when she's older and how much they love her. Very personal identifying info was also given. Our names are in there as being very good people, but it's clear that we are only allowing letters once a year despite biomom wanting much more contact.
Does anyone have experience with this sort of situation?