Mamas who TTC'd for a year or more thread « Back to Group Discussions

[monkeyscience]

Any other mamas out there who dealt with infertility before becoming pregnant? Please come hang out with me!

I don't wish any ill on those who got pregnant on their first try, or who are having a "surprise" baby, but those of us who tried for a long time sometimes need our own place to be!

My story:

I was diagnosed with PCOS in April 2010, a month and a half before my wedding. As I have had irregular periods from the beginning, and knew from charting that I very rarely ovulated, this wasn't a big surprise. We decided not to prevent from the get-go, since we figured we shouldn't be picky about when we had a baby, as we might not get one at all! We started seeing an RE in January of 2011 (I hadn't ovulated at all up to this point), and final started a cycle of Femara in April 2011. My cycle coincided with my grandfather passing away, and traveling for his funeral. This was not super-conducive to BD, and though we did try, nothing came of it. BFN on Mother's Day 2011, and it was crushing. We had both been so sure that if I could just ovulate (dh has "excellent fertility" according to the urologist), I would get pregnant. We discontinued treatment after our BFN both for financial reasons and because we disliked our RE. In August, I miraculously ovulated on my own again, and was completely crushed when it was another BFN. Another ovulation in October, another BFN.

At the beginning of November, I saw a new OB/GYN about my PCOS. I was concerned because I gained about 15 lbs in 3 months, and no amount of exercise seemed to be touching it. He recommended the South Beach Diet and BCPs. I started the diet, but the BCPs never happened because I ovulated on November 22nd and got my BFP on December 3rd!! So after a long year and a half of (mostly fruitless) TTC, I am excited to be here and hopeful I can stay!

Hoping to find some other mamas who've been waiting awhile for their new little one!

Edited by monkeyscience - 12/16/11 at 9:12am

[sallyrae17]

Hey monkeyscience! Though I haven't been TTC for a long period of time, I've had numerous losses and I think that my feelings of frustration, hopelessness and uncertainty are comparable to someone who has been trying to have a baby for a long time. I don't have a problem with getting pregnant (it actually happens more frequently than it probably should), but my body has a hard time of keeping the baby and then properly dealing with it when it's no longer growing (read numerous missed miscarriages). 

Basically, I just wanted to welcome you to the group and let you know that there are definitely others out there who have felt the same things you have felt. I sincerely hope that you have a happy and healthy 9 months and look forward to chatting with you!

Sally

[eleuthia]

I didn't officially try for a year (because of my health issues), but we decided in October 2010 that we wanted to have a child. My cycles were very long & irregular so I knew we'd have to fix that first. I was diagnosed with PCOS in November 2010 - it was something I had wondered about but the previous doctors I had seen pretty much dismissed my concerns. I was also diagnosed with another health issue at the same visit & had to be on medication for a couple months that incompatible with TTC.

In January, I started taking metformin, in the hopes that it would regulate my cycles. It slowly started to work, but I still wasn't getting regular, ovulatory periods. I had a preconception visit with a midwife in May and she referred me to the RE in the practice. I first saw her in June and started clomid in July - fortunately, it did make me ovulate!

In August, I had a bartholin's gland abscess (the gland is at the entrance to the vagina) that kept me off work for a week & I had surgery to help correct the problem. I had already taken all my clomid when it happened, and there was no way for us to try, so I was pretty disappointed. In September, I took the cycle off clomid since I wasn't sure how long it would take me heal, but we were able to try.

October was back on clomid & the RE seemed really positive about my lining at 7DPO, but it was a BFN. November was another clomid cycle and my temps were so weird and my normal post-o symptoms didn't show up right away, so I was worried I didn't even ovulate... but I got a BFP on December 1st! 

I'm 4w6d today and honestly, I am terrified! I am thrilled to even get a BFP, but I'd really like this one to stick! 

Congrats to both of you, and lots of sticky vibes!  

[monkeyscience]

sally - Thanks for the welcome! And so sorry to hear about your losses. To me, having trouble staying pregnant seems even more heartbreaking than having trouble getting pregnant. You're certainly more than welcome to hang out here. :) I hope that this baby is nice and sticky and healthy for you!

eleuthia - (Very cool-sounding name, btw!) Wow... you have been through a lot in this past year! I have tried metformin a couple of times, but really can't tolerate it. I also had some weird sort of abscess that I wondered if it was a Bartholin's gland abscess, but by the time I was able to see a doctor, it was totally gone. Still don't know what it was, but it really freaked me out! I hope you've got a sticky little bean, too!

AFM, my temperature dropped quite a bit this morning, and I'm really worried that I'm going to miscarry. I'm hoping and praying that isn't what's going on, but it won't surprise me if it is. I know there's really nothing to be done about it at this point, one way or another, so I guess I'll just have to wait and see, and hope this was a fluke temperature!

[iixivboots]

Monkey, thanks for this thread and helping me find my way here. Hopefully some of our other IF sisters will wander over since there seem to be more than a few BFPs on this thread. Have you had betas done? I can't imagine temping, I would go NUTS. I am just taking things slowly, one step at a time. Next blood draw is Monday, and then Wednesday, and then an U/S if I get good rises.

For everyone else, I got my BFP after 17 months of trying, on my first Clomid cycle!

[monkeyscience]

I haven't had any betas done yet. Since this is an entirely unmedicated/unmonitored cycle (aka, a wonderful blessing and surprise natural pregnancy!) I don't really have any established care provider. My temps have been back up the last two days, though, which is good. I guess Friday was just a fluke. Because my cycles are so erratic, temping is key to having any clue of what's going on in my body, so normal it's a good thing! Otherwise, I'd have no idea I ovulated (well, other than that I actually used OPKs this cycle), and no idea that I was pregnant - I would think it was just another month like so many before when I didn't have a period. (Going 90+ days without a period was totally normal for me.) This way, too, I know exactly when this baby was conceived and don't have to get a dating ultrasound, though obviously there is part of me that would be very reassured by hearing a heart beat!

Anyway, welcome over here, and hope to hear good things about your beta numbers Monday! I am going to see what I can do about having some betas done, but I'm in a tiny town in Oklahoma, and not sure where, if anywhere, I can get blood draws and testing done.

[monkeyscience]

Okay, looks like there's pretty much no way of getting a beta done till I'm back in Texas. So wait it will be! I've been queasy all day, though, so hopefully that means things are going well.

[jukim]

Hey ladies I'm new here.My post may be a little long so bare with me.

I don't know if I'm pregnant but I felt most comfortable writing in this thread because I want to have a child but I have been diagnosed with hyperthyroidism since 2010 which may present infertility problems. And if I do manage to conceive it could result in early miscarriages. I've only been trying for 2 months but I felt like if I get a BFN this month you guys would understand my fears and concerns with not being able to conceive for a long time. 

My period is due on the 18th or 19th Dec but so far I haven't had any of my usual pre-menstrual symptoms neither do I feel like I have any of the early pregnancy symptoms (at least not that I could identify them clearly). Usually I have very, very sore boobs but I don't have it this time. I also never get cramps but now I feel this extreme tightness in my stomach with mild cramping for the past week.  When I eat regardless of how little I feel over stuffed and bloated and my tops feel rediculously tight after. My stomach is also a little sensitive to touch.

I feel slightly nauseous on mornings after I eat but that could be becasue I eat breakfast way too late after getting up (10 a.m.). I feel extremely warm but that could be my thyroid. Plus a couple other little things which could also be my thyroid function going crazy which in turn could also be as a result of pregnancy...or not. I get some back pains but my work chair is horrible. I just can't pin it at all.

When you are TTC you pay attention to the slightest things but the anticipation of knowing for sure is killing me but yet the disappointment of getting a BFN will be just as bad or worst. It's even more difficult being unable to tell whether my symptoms are associated with my pending AF or early pregnancy or my Thyroid issues. Yesterday a first response gave me a negative but I know I still have until the next week to be sure.

Keeping hope alive nonetheless!!

[marinak1977]

Can I join in? I was a long time graduate of the TTC for 12 months thread before merged with the 6 month thread and became BSL. It took us 2 years and 1 loss to get a sticky BFP. We knew we wanted more than one, and I was terrified that we'll have IF issues again. It ended up taking 8 months since we started trying, so I'm elated.
I also have hypothyroidism so I need to be vigilant and consistent about keeping my thyroid hormone levels steady.

[monkeyscience]

jukim - You're welcome to hang out here, and I hope you are pregnant! Whether or not you are, you might also consider checking out the Infertility One Thread, or the Infertility forum in general. Lots of great ladies there TTC with lots of medical issues. My SIL also had problems getting pregnant, and fixing her thyroid issues (well, medicating them, anyway), definitely helped her. She now has a 14-month-old and week-old twins, so it must have helped a lot!

marinak - Come on in! I'm really not a bouncer, I promise. :) I spent a year as a BSL, too, and it was really a great place for me. Since almost all my friends there have graduated, though, I am happy to have finally moved on. (There are literally one or two left from when I joined last December, not even counting those who joined and graduated while I was there!) I'm glad that your second has come easier than your first, even though it sounds like it still took awhile! Oh, and I love the baby in the dryer picture - did he put himself in there?

AFM, queasiness continues, so I'm hoping this little bean is growing. Though I would rather feel better, honestly. I hate throwing up with a passion, and even though I haven't yet, feeling like I might all day/night long is not so fun. But I've made it to 5 weeks, which makes me happy. Every day my temps stay up and I don't have any bleeding is a victory, in my book! Can't wait for Christmas so I can tell the family!

[jukim]

Thanks monkey, was your SIL thyroid function overactive or underactive? Mine is overactive

[Montessortof]

Thanks for starting this thread. I think it's really helpful to bond with people who also had trouble getting pregnant.

I have a DS who is three years old, and it was easy as pie getting pregnant with him. He showed up naturally on our third month trying. So we figured that #2 would be just as easy. But it just didn't happen. After a year, we started to see an RE for testing, but everything came back normal. We were about to start a cycle of Clomid + IUI back in July, but my period didn't start and I found out I was pregnant. Unfortunately that ended in an early miscarriage. I miscarried at seven weeks, but an ultrasound showed that the sac had stopped growing at 4w1d and there was nothing visible inside it at all.

After that, we had two failed IUI attempts and then went for IVF, which worked! So here I am, with a hopefully sticky bean or two, after a year and a half of trying.

[monkeyscience]

jukim - I misread your post - my SIL is HYPOthyroid, which is different than what you have. I actually have an uncle who is HYPERthyroid, but I'm pretty sure he had his thyroid irradiated, so now it's like he doesn't have a thyroid at all, and is on the same medication as people with hypothyroidism. Other than irradiation, I actually don't know anything about how hyperthyroidism is treated. What kind of doctor are you seeing for your hyperthyroidism? Do they know you want to get pregnant, and if they do, are they experienced with that? It definitely sounds like the kind of thing a good doctor could make a difference in.

montessortof - I'm a long-time stalker of the IVF thread, and was excited to see you get your BFP!! Welcome to the thread! And from what you've posted over there, I think it's quite possible you've got two in there. Plus it seems like everyone over there is getting 2 these days! Either way, hope you are here with us to stay.

[marinak1977]

Originally Posted by monkeyscience 


marinak - Come on in! I'm really not a bouncer, I promise. I spent a year as a BSL, too, and it was really a great place for me. Since almost all my friends there have graduated, though, I am happy to have finally moved on. (There are literally one or two left from when I joined last December, not even counting those who joined and graduated while I was there!) I'm glad that your second has come easier than your first, even though it sounds like it still took awhile! Oh, and I love the baby in the dryer picture - did he put himself in there?

AFM, queasiness continues, so I'm hoping this little bean is growing. Though I would rather feel better, honestly. I hate throwing up with a passion, and even though I haven't yet, feeling like I might all day/night long is not so fun. But I've made it to 5 weeks, which makes me happy. Every day my temps stay up and I don't have any bleeding is a victory, in my book! Can't wait for Christmas so I can tell the family!

Monkey, thanks for the welcome! I found that even after getting a baby earthside, I still kept rooting for the BSL ladies and stalking you guys, and I was thrilled to pop into the thread recently and find so many graduates (MBA, you, LTB, Lava, Kinza :joy) I'm so hoping for those veterans who are still there.

The picture in the drier is my favorite - thank you! DS was about 8 month and in his fascinated with laundry state, I had to help him in - but he was so proud once he got inside. He lost interest after the first visit though.

[Sol_y_Paz]

We were at the point we were going to seek out a fertility doctor in Jan despite reservations about the cost.  I had many tests with my normal doctor and also saw a ND.  We had not taken artificial birth control for years.  

Edited by Sol_y_Paz - 2/16/12 at 11:02pm

[monkeyscience]

Just wanted to revive this thread and bump it a bit.

I have my first midwife appointment on Thursday, and am pretty excited for that. I have remained fairly sick, though with some better days sprinkled in. Yesterday was hellish, today has been reasonable. I really am ready for some professional support in telling me that this is normal, and that it will pass! That, or giving me some sort of idea of how to make it go away! It's frustrating because what helps one days just doesn't cut it another.

dh is really pushing to get an early ultrasound, and I think I may well give in. He wants to make sure it's not twins before we invest too much money in going to a birth center (where twin births are not allowed). I keep trying to explain to him that the chance of twins is extremely remote, but he's adamant. And honestly, with all the pain I've been experiencing, I really want some reassurance that this pregnancy isn't ectopic. Although, really, I think I would have had more symptoms/it would have ruptured by now (8 weeks). But I also want to see the heart beat, so I can feel ready to tell more people about this baby. I've been trying really hard to be strong, to trust my body, to recover from the lack of trust IF causes, and for the most part, it works. But I really don't want to go through all this sickness if the baby has already passed. I know it's not common for that to happen, but I know it does, and I think the reassurance would be nice. If dh weren't so insistent, I would probably wait a few more weeks to try to hear the heartbeat via doppler, but he seems to have very strong feelings about this, and I want him to feel like his input is valued. He's certainly not getting his way in a lot of other ways in regards to this birth (he'd be more comfortable in a hospital, and he thinks an epidural sounds like the best thing since sliced bread), and I guess I don't really have enough conviction on this point to fight him. I still want to limit ultrasounds to one early one and the anatomy scan unless there's some other indication, but since I don't think the midwife even has an ultrasound machine, that shouldn't be too hard.

How is everyone else doing? sol_y_paz, I know you mentioned elsewhere that you had to have surgery soon. I hope you are doing okay with that! Hope everyone else is okay, and congratulations to monte on her twins!!

[Montessortof]

I am all in favor of early ultrasounds. My philosophy is, the more information, the better.

[iixivboots]

bump! Just thinking of you guys (and myself) and what a different journey this has been for us. Maybe there are some new members who didn't see this thread.

[monkeyscience]

Thanks for the bump. :)

I have not been on a whole lot lately, but I am happy to report that I seem to be feeling a little better! I'm hoping it's week 10 magic, and that it's here to stay. It's nice not to feel like crap all the time! I'm definitely anxiously awaiting the 12-week visit so we can hear that heartbeat again. I know anything can still happen at any point, but both statistically and from what I've seen around MDC, losing the baby after 12 weeks is much less common than losing it before. Yes, I'm still being haunted by that fear.

[monkeyscience]

Oh, and I guess I never did update to say - I did as dh wanted and got a very quick ultrasound at my first appointment. Turns out the mw does have an ultrasound machine, though it's small, portable, and crappy. She said she saw the baby, and saw it move, but I am not 100% sure I saw it. It might have just been my imagination. But, much to my surprise, we did hear a heartbeat at 8 weeks with the doppler! So that was really reassuring. I'm disappointed dh wasn't able to make that appointment, but he'll be coming to my next one.