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Thread Starter 

So, how do you deal with your parents when they are blatantly disrespectful?


I am a non-confrontational person, but I've about had enough of my dad.  He doesn't like a lot of my parenting choices and he says so in front of the kids (calls the food i eat, hippie shit -- the food that his grandchildren eat at home mind you...) ...  etc.  He's never been a tactful person - and that was exascerbated by a medical condition that affected the part of his brain where you find tact, so he's REALLY not tactful now) ...  (food is just one of many - i could say the same about homeschooling, non-spanking, etc.)


Example from today that is killing me (I hate how i handled it AND that he did it)... I don't even know what started it, but my 6yo ds was asking for something crappy to eat - i said no - my dad told ds that he did it wrong and that he should have gotten me to watch tv, and THEN asked for it...  I was in the other room for that part of the conversation and am pg - due any day - so by the time I got back in the room (love open floor plans) it was over.  I pulled ds aside and talked to him about sneaking, why sneaking was wrong and that he had to use his own brain to decide what was right and wrong and not let grandpa override what his brain knew... 


I feel like I should have called my father out instead of talking to ds, but I also think that I'll have more success in talking to ds...  at least, until he figures it out for himself...  (I'm trying not to care about the total crap they feed him when he's over...but we're over 2-3times a week and it adds up!  So its not like I NEVER let them feed him crappy treats...) 


How would you handle a dad like that?  (btw - my mom is awesome!  she sides with my dad on a lot of stuff, but you'd never know it unless we're having a private discussion about something -- and I don't want to punish her because he's a pita, yanno?)


(And... my parents are great.  They are totally there for me/us...  they're typical overbearing italian in your face parents...  I know I'm making him out to be an ogre, but when he's not being subversive, he's awesome...  I just don't want my kids to think there's something wrong with the way I'm raising them because of grandpa's very strong opinions... )