My mom and brother consult my hubby and I before buying items for the kids. They know that we have preferences with what the kids play with and respect them. They also know that we have a lot of junk and get us things they know we would all like.
My in-laws and others completely ignored an email that I sent around both for birthdays and Christmas with ideas (even though I was asked in years past). My in laws send things wrapped.
Does anyone screen items before their kids open them? This is new territory for us as in years past the kids have been easily distracted and toys that do not fit into our home have just been quietly hidden and left unused (so as not to waste).