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First-time mamas! - Page 16

post #301 of 425

My friend bought a giant baby sponge to use in both the sink and the tub for the baby, so that's what we're doing too.  It's more flexible than a tub, in my opinion.  I'm putting an Ameda (or whatever the name is) breast pump on my registry, but I forgot about milk storage bags and such until someone above mentioned them.  I'm using myregistry.com, which is easy to use.  No completion discounts or anything, but I don't think we'll end up buying a bunch of stuff if we don't get it from other people.

post #302 of 425

Crashing again.  I'm not sure if you know, but US carseats are actually illegal to use in Canada.  :( 


Several people on the carseat board I go to have had seats confiscated by customs or been stopped at the border, and I just saw a government release confirming they will do this.  Just wanted to make sure you know before you decide whether or not to risk it.

post #303 of 425

This doesn't affect me, but out of curiosity are Canadian carseats legal in the US/do they meet US safety standards? What do you do if you travel frequently between both countries? I mean, they don't require US residents to have Canadian carseats, do they? 

post #304 of 425

All foreign seats are technically illegal in the US, but it's very unlikely anyone would be caught.  We have so many seats here that your average police officer just wouldn't know the difference.  And I believe the law in at least some parts of the US is that it is only illegal to use the seat, not to import it, so that makes it hard to enforce.  There's a theoretical risk that it may cause complications with insurance companies or the police in a crash as far as liability and such but companies and policies and the law vary so much here that's there's no absolutes.


The reason is that standards and testing are different in different places.  Swedish seats, for example, will never be able to pass our testing because of the way the federal testing sled is built.  Swedish seats have foot props and usually require rear facing tethering, and our testing equipment has no floors or front seats to tether to, so it's just impossible.  There are some people whose kids have special needs or want to rear face their kids to 55 lbs like the Swedes do and they make the choice to import and take the possible risks.


It's kind of a moot point, since I can't imagine any situation other than the 55 lb RF Swedish seats where someone in the US would want to import.  Seats in every other country are far more expensive than ours, and other than Swedish seats have lower limits for use anyway.  And importing a Swedish seat is a big decision as it will run $500-$600 which most people just wouldn't (or even have reason to) do.

post #305 of 425

I'm pretty sure Canada has exceptions for US residents who are visting or traveling in Canada.  But I believe if you are living there you must use a Canadian seat whether you are American or not.  Europe is supposed to only make exceptions for military members who live on a base or something, but that's a situation where I really can't see someone getting in trouble if they're only visiting.

post #306 of 425

Wow, Ninetales.... I had no idea!  Thanks for the info.  My carseat decision right now is between a Maxi Cosi and a Britax.  Both are foreign brands (I think) - so does that mean that they'd slip by without concern?  I could have sworn that the B.R.US here in Winnipeg was also carrying popular US brand carseats such as Safety1st and Graco?  There's obviously more to it than I'm aware...... Once our LO is born, we only have 1 road trip back across the border planned, which will be when we relocate to NYC this Fall (unless DH has project delays keeping us here through winter - then we'd be traveling via air for the holidays....)

post #307 of 425

All the major brands have distribution in multiple countries.  The seats themselves are different from US or European seats in order to meet different countries' testing requirements.  Britax, Graco, Evenflo, Diono, and Dorel (which encompasses Maxi Cosi, Safety 1st, Cosco, and Eddie Bauer) all sell seats that conform to Canadian standards.  If you can buy it in a Canadian store, it is a Canadian certified seat.  If you want to be sure, there will be a maple leaf sticker on the side that says the seat has passed CMVSS 213.  :)

post #308 of 425

So, is anyone else horribly behind on planning?  My teaching ends in mid-May, but then we have graduation and all that crazy stuff and I still have a book chapter and some other research to finish.  DH is finishing the nursery flooring this weekend, so technically we could start moving stuff in, but we don't have anything to move in.  I've bought a few swaddles and sleep sacks on zulily and my students bought be a little basket of rubber duckies and little things like that (very sweet of them), but we have no furniture.  I'm sort of waiting until the shower to see what we get (my mom offered to pony up for the crib and organic mattress and the in-laws are buying us a jogging stroller), but it seems weird to wait especially since the big shower won't be until early July.  I think it will be odd to have an empty nursery until then. 


I'm not really stressed about it, but sometimes I feel like I'm not really doing enough and then I stress about not being stressed about it.  I guess in some ways its better to hold off buying stuff until later if the alternative is to go nuts and buy stuff we'll never use.  I'm just feeling weird about the whole thing right now.  I guess I really just want work to be over so I can look around and start prioritizing.

post #309 of 425
Originally Posted by LilyTiger View Post


I'm not really stressed about it, but sometimes I feel like I'm not really doing enough and then I stress about not being stressed about it.  I guess in some ways its better to hold off buying stuff until later if the alternative is to go nuts and buy stuff we'll never use.  I'm just feeling weird about the whole thing right now.  I guess I really just want work to be over so I can look around and start prioritizing.

Yes, exactly! I'm not stressed but I just keep thinking that time WILL run out and shopping for essentials w a newborn is not an ideal scenario, so maybe I should be stressing a bit more about this..? Espacially since April basically just evaporated! How is it May already?! And we might end up moving as soon as July but won't know about that until June. So, it's possible that I will basically have no time to prep after next month if the move does happen. The situation is so crazy, I'm just in wait and see mode. At this point I think I'm going to keep it super simple and get our carseat, a sampler of cloth diapers, a wrap carrier, a dresser, a rocker and a moses basket. Plus some swaddling blankets, onsies and stuff. I guess the rest will just wait. Good luck with the close of your semester and book! I hope it goes smoothly and quickly for you. :)

post #310 of 425
I wonder about being behind, too, LilyTiger. Certainly, if our baby were to come tomorrow, we'd have basically nothing for him. Then again, I also know that if he were to come tomorrow, he'd be in the hospital for a LONG time, so we'd have plenty of time to get stuff before he'd actually be in any state to use it! For me, there's really 3 interconnected factors behind delaying. One, we're moving in two weeks, and I need to focus on that, and I don't want to move a bunch of baby stuff I don't have to. This is also why, two, my shower won't be until June, probably. We actually haven't gotten that one all worked out yet. Someone wanted to do one in May for me, but it would have been the weekend we were moving, so that was no dice. And I definitely want to see what people give me before I go out and buy stuff for myself. This plays into factor three, which is that, at present, the baby has no money allocated for him in the budget, and the budget is pretty tight. We are saving for the cost of the birth, and should be more than fine there, assuming no transfer to the hospital. But we haven't yet gotten him in the budget otherwise. This is partly due to being focused on moving expenses, too. Plus, I figure I'll have a better idea of how much I NEED to spend once I know what others are going to give us. Oh, and I guess I'm also waiting to see what I get from SIL as far as hand-me-downs, but that's also waiting until I'm doing moving.

Still, it does offend the nesting part of my brain that I haven't done more. I just have to keep reminding myself of all the above reasons, and of that fact that, for me personally, I still have PLENTY of time, as I don't have any work obligations or anything like that. I still have more than 3 months till the baby is due, and if he comes significantly before that, well, he won't be needing the things we would buy immediately. I also don't have a nursery to prepare or anything like that, so it's pretty much just buying, washing, and organizing things for me. My rough goal is probably to have everything all set by about 34 or 35 weeks.

About baby tubs - I think we're going to get one of the foldable foam kinds, and maybe another "convertible" one, like Fisher-Price. We'll see. I think family members have just put an old towel in the bottom of the kitchen sink or bathtub and used that, so we'll see. Our new place has a garden tub, which I'm super excited about, but is not good for leaning over and washing babies in. I don't remember what the kitchen sink's like, but that may well be our baby bathtub.

Oh, and just some food for thought regarding bathing babies - I started a thread awhile back about whether or not you need to use soap on your babies, and the overall consensus seems to be no, or not all over. I found all the perspectives interesting, so if anyone else is interested, you can see what other mamas said here.
post #311 of 425

Monkey, those responses are helpful.  We're definitely not doing the soap-up at birth (DH will have to get over it) and I was pretty much going to avoid doing any kind of soaping unless absolutely necessary.  My friend's newborn got bathed once a week.  She was worried he was getting too dirty, but he really seemed fine.  I'll probably buy Burt's Bees or Dr. Bronner's baby stuff to have around because I know DH will be more anal about washing the kid than I will be.  My general philosophy is that immune systems were created for dirt.  They weren't created to handle all the other crap (like harsh shampoos, etc.).  I'll have to check out California Baby, since a few of the other moms on that thread recommended it.

post #312 of 425
Thread Starter 

Honestly, I feel more prepared with the stuff we have than emotionally prepared for birth and parenting a newborn. I know in some ways there's no real way to prepare, but I feel like other people are in a better place than I am. This could be because I am under a ton of stress because it's the end of the school year (two more weeks after this one). I also have to take my glucose test in the next few weeks and I'm stressing about that.

I haven't done the hospital tour, a childcare or birth class, none of it. I haven't really been reading a lot about birth and I don't really have a clear picture of what I want and don't want. I feel so overwhelmed when I think about only have 8 weeks to learn to take care of a child and then having to go back to work.

post #313 of 425
Yeah, I'm feeling less prepared than I'd like in the birth department. I've read a ton on birth, but not that much recently. For me, some decisions are already made since I decided to go with a birth center. But I would really like to get a childbirth class scheduled, especially for dh, but also for me. I want to ask my midwife what I need to bring/what she recommends I bring for the birth. I need to read up on breastfeeding. And I am terrified that, despite choosing natural birth, I'm going to be a complete weenie. I'm afraid that I can't do it because I'm weak, mentally and physically. I still really haven't gotten my strength back from months of morning sickness and lying around. I feel pretty confident in the parenting strategies I'm planning on, but I'm worried about all the things that I don't know or haven't thought of. I'm scared of having a difficult or inconsolable baby. I'm worried about arguing with dh about parenting and doing things around the house. So, yes, definitely feeling you on the lack of the emotional preparation!
post #314 of 425

Boots I also haven't done a tour, classes, or glucose test either.  Haven't even decided on a car seat or a name either!  redface.gif  Did make a rough birth plan (need to organize it a bit more) and did decide on a baby wash, Dr. Bronners for baby.  

post #315 of 425

Thanks for the additional carseat info, Ninetales!  I'll have DH pick one up during his next trip to the US and then I think we'll be covered in that regard (they are cheaper to buy in the US anyways).  Hopefully we won't run into any issues for the remaining few months that we're driving locally here in Canada..... we hardly drive that much....


Hooray for finishing up school soon, LilyTiger and Boots!  I think you'll be able to enjoy your freed up time to catch up on those things that you may feel 'behind' on very quickly!  I feel like we still have a lot of "to do's", but I won't start stressing until June probably.  But I know this month of May is going to fly by and then I'll feel the pressure!


Monkey - Good luck on your impending move!!  And thanks for linking to the "bathing" thread.  I've been pondering Baby's bath needs and our approach to that a lot lately.... with all the pee and poop that merely gets wiped off their bums on a daily basis, I wondered how often soap was needed - so it's good to hear what other people's thoughts are on that topic.  I've also been searching for the "perfect" tub.  I'd really prefer to just plop LO right in the kitchen sink but I know it wouldn't be a good idea with all the raw meats/scraps/chemicals that have lingered in there... I've considered a cheap plastic dish basin that fits inside the sink, but I like how some of the proper baby tubs have the built-in incline to support them at an upright angle.  But I just hate the idea of having this big hunk of plastic tub laying around the house and then taking up room in our car when we move....


So despite my being obsessed with keeping our baby "gear" to a minimum until we relocate to the east coast, I went against my plan and bought a very nice (used!) I'COO stroller yesterday.  Here's a video of its features... I really like that the seat can be turned to rear facing and that it also converts into a bassinet - essential for the first months.  It also includes a universal car seat adapter which was a huge selling point.  At a bargain (orig $500, I got it for $180 in great condition) my impulsive side took over.  Of course, it takes up the entire trunk of our small SUV - which is the very reason we wanted to wait until after our move to pick up a stroller..... I guess my rationale was that it wasn't a huge investment and we could re-sell it prior to our move if needed.


It's tough (for me) getting used to how much space this Baby is inevitably going to take up - with stufffff - given our nomadic lifestyle!!

post #316 of 425
Thread Starter 

Hey Lilytiger, so funny, we got our nursery paint today. We were looking at a few different Behr grays but we ended up with Pewter Mug! Then I googled "pewter mug nursery" and it brought me to this thread!

post #317 of 425

Ah Boots, that's so funny!  It is such a beautiful color and looks great with a clean white trim.  I'll post some pics if I can find some (and if I haven't already... I'm forgetting what I've posted and not on this thread).  I also found a beautiful yellow/orange rag rug at urbanoutfitters.com online that will look great with the grey, so I think we're going to go with that. 

post #318 of 425

oooh, I hope you all will share photos of you grey nurseries!   We are still trying to figure the nursery out...as of now it's still a mess of a guest room, that I am actually sleeping in because the mattress is firmer.  I am finding that I also just really like sleeping alone-- I'm so restless at night that I feel like I'd disturb DH anyway. 


Boots-I know how you feel about being overwhelmed!  I am starting to feel a bit better (after taking 2 birth classes, which I really enjoyed!) but I still have that stack of birthing/parenting books staring me down each evening, when I just want to turn out the light :)  I, too, will be heading right back to work and I'm soooo nervous about all the transitions our little family will be going through in such a short time starting in August....

post #319 of 425
Thread Starter 

We're almost ready to take nursery pics :)


This thread needs to be revived because I'm really experiencing some FTM crazies, I can't be the only one.

I stay up googling things like "do I need a diaper pail" and tonight "thumb sucking vs. pacifier"

Ugh, make it stop!

I keep second guessing decisions that were already made a long time ago, like the decision not to cloth diaper because LO will be going into in-home daycare fairly early and I don't think my friend would be comfortable with it at all. (among other reasons). 

I just want to feel like we will be prepared and I have some idea what I'm doing. Actually no, I just want to sleep. ;)

post #320 of 425

I hear ya, Boots!


I feel like we're pretty well stocked up on "things", but now I'm obsessing more about "processes" after baby's arrival - like breastfeeding, sleeping, my time management, etc....


I have a stack of books to read (vaccines, infant care, breastfeeding, etc), which I'm certain I won't have the time/energy to open once baby is here - so the pressure's on to get it all done in the next 6 weeks!  I'm actually reading The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding at the moment - which is very helpful and insightful - but at the same time, it's bringing up a whole new bunch of things I hadn't worried about before by emphasizing the "importance" of my role as a mama... eeeek!   



.....Would love to see how everyone's nurseries have turned out!!

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