Yay for hearing a heartbeat, justchanti!
dh and I had a conversation last night about various parenting topics, and it went better than I expected, overall. He's totally fine with having a sidecar crib (I didn't bring up co-sleeping in our bed, because we have trouble enough finding room for just the two of us in our bed!). He kind of wanted me to put a definite endpoint on the baby sleeping in our room, but we left it vague. I said probably by a year the baby could move out, but that we'd really have to see. I'm not wild about co-sleeping with a toddler, anyway, so that should probably work out. He's totally fine with exclusive breastfeeding, and said he figured I'd want to do that. He's also good with no CIO, as he doesn't want to listen to our baby cry, either. He was much less enthused about cloth diapering, though. He said he gave that about a 10% approval rating. He mostly just thinks it's gross. I'm not 100% sure I want to cloth diaper, so we'll see. I just feel horrible about all the landfill space. He says he figures we still have a lot more space for landfills. It's really strange - he works for renewable energy (wind power) and is very proud of that, and is in to all sort of "green" civil engineering type stuff, but a lot of day-to-day stuff just doesn't interest him. He loves paper towels and all other sorts of disposable cleaning/cooking items, he doesn't worry at all about cleaning chemicals, and is very dubious about my use of good ol' hot water to wipe down the table and counters. I guess he's much more "macro-green" and I'm a lot more "micro-green," which can be kind of frustrating. But anyway, we'll see about the diaper thing.
I was very hesitant to bring up circumcision with him. Honestly, I very much considered never bringing it up, since we're having a birth center birth, so no circumcision there. And I figured he'd probably honestly never think about it on his own. But I decided that wasn't the best way to handle it. So I brought up that I didn't want our sons circumsized, because I didn't see why we should cut perfectly healthy skin off our baby's body, and he was mostly okay with that. He asked if there wasn't some "medical reason" they normally did it, and I told him no, the AAP recommends against it, and it's not routinely done outside of the US. I did mention that there was some slight reduction in the risk of AIDS transmission for circumsized men, but that that really didn't justify it. I also mentioned that while our sons could always be circumsized later if they chose, you can't really uncircumsize someone. So he was pretty much on board (he isn't even sure if he's circumsized, though I'm 95% sure he is, so it's not a big identity thing with him), but I also threw in the kickers that a.) they don't anesthetize newborns for circumcision, and how would he like that done to him, and b.) circumcisions are occasionally botched, causing serious damage or even loss of "man parts". That definitely horrified him, so it looks like we won't have to rehash that discussion.
The delayed/selective vax issue started out somewhat well, but sort of degenerated into a stalemate because I didn't have a lot of facts handy to back me up, and dh pretty much assumes that if they give kids vaxes, they must be 100% safe. So we'll see how that goes after further research.
Anybody else have these kinds of discussions with their dh/dp? Any other issues I should think about bringing up before baby comes? (We've already argued about homeschooling a couple of times, so we're trying to shelve anything that isn't immediately relevant.)