Allowance for HS kid?

[tankgirl73]

I'm wondering what other HS parents of young teens do for allowances and their reasons why they do what they do.  :)

My son is 13... and I don't give him an allowance.  Never really have either.  He gets some money for odd jobs he does for his dad's relatives and usually gets LOTS at Christmas and his birthday.  We also have an account set up through Family Mint, where he manages savings for specific shorter-term goals as well as longer-term 'saving up for college' kind of thing.  He has used his saved up money to buy a second-hand iPod, stuff for his iPod (apps, music etc), occasionally for eating out, etc.  So he's not really suffering for cash.

I was just thinking about it again... I wonder every so often if I should be giving him an allowance.  Teaching money management and all that.  But then I'm wondering... what would he really need it for?  

It seems to me that kids who go to school need money for lunch, buying tickets for school raffles, stuff like that.  He doesn't need any of that.  

He's not interested yet in buying his own clothes... and he still gets lots of clothes as gifts from his dad's family anyway.  And he doesn't need a lot of clothes either... he's not peer-pressured into any particular fashion or needing new stuff.  He has his own goofy style, and will often just wear the same shirt for days on end until I make him wash it lol... So it's not like he needs tons of clothes either.

When he goes out with his friends, he doesn't often do stuff that needs money.  They usually just visit and play.

When there is something he really wants, like a video game or some music equipment, and it's not something I'd otherwise buy for him, he is able to save up from his odd jobs though it does take him awhile.  

He has issues with ADHD and some other stuff, part of which is low self-control, self-management, that sort of thing.  He's easily addicted to video games and any kind of faddy toy -- especially the types where you have to buy more and more of them (Pokemon, Bakugon, that sort of thing).  He gets hyper-focused on something he likes, and if he had the money for it, would drown himself in cheap plastic addictive junk.  And junk food, too, actually, heh.  IMO that's not any way to practice responsible money management!  

I know the mantra is often "give them the responsibility and they'll live up to it" ;)  But I also know my son, and he's not ready for that responsibility yet.  We're working on it a bit at a time.  It's more complicated because of his 'issues'.

I think when he's a little older he'll need an allowance until/unless he gets a part time job.  When he starts dating, for instance!  :)

But for now... I'm just thinking... if he were in school, he'd certainly need one, but I'm just not sure what he would need one for right now.  

What do you all think?

[moominmamma]

I think you know your kid best. Maybe the status quo is the right choice for him?

My kids aren't given money as gifts. We've instituted an allowance as a money-learning tool quite young (age 5 or so). They used it to learn savings strategies, consumer skills, budgeting, etc.. By age 14/15 we were kind of phasing allowances out because the kids were developing other reliable forms of income (part-time work, babysitting, etc.) which made the allowance superfluous.

The one thing your ds might be missing out on is the experience of budgeting based on long-term steady income. I think there's a lot to be said for identifying priorities and then planning and waiting and saving as you accumulate the money you need to buy something outright. Still, if he's getting other experience with planning and structuring and waiting and being patient, he may not need that lesson in financial form.

Miranda

[pigpokey]

I don't really believe in allowances if a child has some opportunity to earn money out of the household.  If a child has no time for that, then that's different.  I tell my kids the family buys them more than they need and some of what they want, and after that, if we don't think it's a good way to spend the money, then they can pay for it themselves from saved earnings and gifts. 

[zebra15]

I'm of the mind frame you don't 'need' money to 'want' money right?  Just because your bills are paid for the month say on the 10th you don't stop working from the 10th to the 30th, do you?.  Or if you have enough in savings to live for say, 6 months you don't stop working for 6 months.

Around here school kids dont pay for lunch with cash.  They have an account parents put money in and each kid has a number they put in at the end of the line. So your kid may be #6975 and that is how they pay.  The kid does not give the lunch lady $20 on Monday and get change back.  Its all electronic.

My 11 yr old gets about $50 a month allowance.  He doesn't NEED $50 a month but he was saving up for a Nintendo 3D game system (about $150) and games are $40-50 each.    My son has his own bank account and debit card so he knows how to check his balance, pay with a card and keep track of his 'electronic' funds.  Sometimes I give him cash but he really just likes when I transfer funds to him.   DS has the option to do some chores and make extra $$ as well.

He also loves legos and those suckers are $$.  I wont' buy the mini figs $3.00 in a blue bag etc.  I guess its like pokeman etc where you can just keep adding on.  Lego's always has more sets coming out etc.  There are always more video games and such.

He pays his own library fines.

You son needs $$ so he doesn't have to ask you for cash all the time. So he can learn NOW about making choices.  So he can buy something and see how far $20 goes etc.  My son has made some bad choices and I don't step in and fix them for him.  Better he learns them at 8-12 then 20-25 I say.

My son also wants a NOOKColor, I have one and right now we share.  If I decide to get him one he would be responsible for putting apps, books on it. Right now I put them on or occassionally he will pay for one or 2.

He sometimes buys his own books at Half Price Books or Costco.  I really can not afford to keep up with the books this child can go through.