Disability adjusts for inflation - but minimally. We've had years when it didn't increase at all, other times by like a few dollars. The government sets it, so I guess it depends too on the status of things there.
If he dies, the property tax remains at the same rate as long as I live in it and do not remarry. I seriously doubt that he would leave. We have tried a separation before and we both agreed that we will never again try that. IF he did up and leave, just to play the devil's advocate, and we got an official divorce, etc., and for example I stayed in the house and he didn't, then the property tax would return - at least I think. It might not if we lived there for a certain amount of years and I didn't remarry, but I'm not sure about those specifics.
If he dies in the next 10 years we're a bit screwed because then we no longer qualify for healthcare. (SWEET. If he doesn't, then I'd qualify for the rest of my life, and benefits besides (reduced somewhat). If he dies under 10 years, I qualify for NO veteran's benefits (which is so wrong, I'm even trying to write to congress about that!! - if he dies in service or after 10 years you get benefits but if he dies after service and before 10 years you don't qualify for a dime) but we do qualify for SS to the tune of about $1600 a month until the kids grow up, and then it gets reduced to like $500. But I mean if he did die and the kids were grown I would be absolutely working - the reason I don't work (besides that the kids are young) is because I have to take care of him, and I don't have time to work. I guess the worst case scenario is that he died in like 9 years or something and I still wouldn't have any retirement savings.. but I mean I can't plan for EVERY variation of EVERY scenario... ykwim?
3rd - I like the idea. DH hates the idea because he views it as throwing away the rent money - but moving costs would eat up about the same too if we ended up hating the area... =/ But it's somethign to consider. We might spend some time at my mom's house in CT trying to look at houses but I am so tired of not having a house of my own... But we're seriously considering renting, yeah...
4th - We're meeting with a financial planner this week, not through the VA.. I'll have to see if the VA has any financial planners too, that's a good idea.
The basic issue here that's causing me SO much grief is that the doctors don't think that DH is dying... but he does. And while it'd be easy to just say, hey, the doc's say you're OK so we'll go with that - the last time he INSISTED that there was something wrong with him and the docs INSISTED that there was nothing wrong - it turned out he had a hemorhaging brain lesion. DH 1, docs 0.