~~ "LET'S RING IN THE NEW YEAR WITH BFP'S" INFERTILITY ONE THREAD JANUARY 2012 ~~ - Page 3

[Gemmine]

Hi sekena ((hugs)). Love your name and avi. Ugh about that holiday card, especially when your friend knew your situation. And the cousin thing, I commend you for not snapping. I had to sit through everyone exclaiming over my SIL's baby and an uncle asking everyone when she was going to get a little cousin, looking directly at me. Blah.

Thanks renavoo 

chica: I definitely hope you O soon, those long cycles are just unfair and cruel. Thinking sparkly egg thoughts (why sparkly instead of something else I don't know, just go with it).

shesaidboom: I forget, why are you guys taking off this month? Either way, it's always a good time of the year to start focusing on fitness/weight loss/eating changes, etc. Good luck with your goals, and I definitely don't mind you talking about it here.

rcr: I'll be lurking as you go through this process! Ooh a cabin getaway sounds lovely.

brichole: Sorry to hear that :-( We may be cycle buddies for January though, my AF is due on the 31st.

cbaa: How are you doing today, lovely?

AFM: With my tell-tale temp drop, I'm waiting for AF on the 31st. Since this cycle made 12 charts and I know my patterns, this will be my last chart. I actually think it will be less stress to not chart and not feverishly compare my temps to other cycles, etc. so I'm looking forward to that. I called and made an appointment with the RE my OB referred me to and that's scheduled for January 30th. Hoping my DH gets in next week for his sperm analysis.

[rcr]

Gemmine - When I was charting my thermometer was always breaking in the middle of a cycle, or I had crazy sleep patterns. I gave it up years ago and never looked back because I knew my pattern and relied on OPKs.

Brichole - sorry about AF.

[teresaresa]

Hi all! I'd like to be added to the list. I'm still learning all of the shorthand, so I apologize if my first post is too rife with longhand! Let's see, I'm 32 and DH is 46. TTC #1 since 4/09 (married 6/09). We were trying "casually" at first, meaning that I didn't want to put any pressure on us, so we weren't charting or testing for ovulation, etc. After about 6 months, I started getting worried and tried all sorts of ovulation predictors (charting, saliva testers, regular OPKs - didn't know about digital ones at the time). Another 6 months later, and nada. Frustrated we went to a fertility clinic here in NYC where I was told that all of our tests were normal and we had "unexplained infertility" and that I should just go on Clomid. The clinic wasn't big on taking the time to explain things - they saw a lot of patients daily - and I'm not big on taking medications. The result being that we decided to go the holistic route. Acupuncture helped to regulate my cycle (I was swinging between 28 and 37 days after going off the pill), but after a little more than a year of herbs and needles (and with the help of some therapy), I finally sought out another fertility doctor. My new doc has been in practice forever, and I've been told he's a babymaking pioneer :) Month 1 with the new doc was really just a monitored natural cycle. Month 2 he put me on Metformin (I don't have PCOS, but my ovaries look similar to someone with PCOS - nice that the big fancy clinic featured earlier in this tale caught that one...) and Prometrium in the second half of my cycle - progesterone was at 7.5, 4 DPO. Month 3 - sadly the one that will officially end tomorrow or Friday - had me on Metformin and Clomid (days 3-7) with an IUI on day 15 (with a trigger shot) and another IUI on day 16. Blood tests this past Tuesday confirmed a BFN. So, not sure what Month 4 will bring, but I am also looking forward to a BFP in 2012. And, I hope to support a great network of women who know what it's like to be stuck in the 2ww each month. I'm the only one of my friends who is struggling, and several of my friends got pregnant quite literally on their first month of trying. So, as supportive as they are sometimes, they really don't know what it's like and that makes the journey rather lonely sometimes!!! Ok, I think that's way more than enough - thanks for reading if you made it this far ;-)

[renavoo]

Teresaresa, WELCOME! I'm in NYC too and I'm very familiar with the factory like RE offices. One of the offices i went to saw so many people that it really functioned exactly like a factory and with as little time as they spent with each person, I am not surprised that they missed things. Don't get me wrong...I liked them and they had really good results (although I didn't do my IVF with them) but yeah, it felt impersonal.

I wonder if you will be on Clomid again, since they really seem to like to give clomid around 3 tries. How did your ovaries look on clomid? Did they do monitoring during the cycle? Also, how did your lining look? I took clomid and while I ovulated really like clockwork, my uterine lining was abysmal and therefore, unable to sustain a pregnancy even if I conceived! Anyway, I hope your stay here is short but we're so happy to be helping you along your journey.

Gemmine, I charted for about a year and my DH begged me at the end of the year to just stop because he said that it caused too much stress. I've never looked back and honestly, I can't imagine doing it again. Boy, that really takes a lot of dedication. Not to mention, my sleep habits were horrendous in the last few months leading to my BFP so it wouldn't have worked anyway! I hope you're feeling better today and you're in my thoughts. I'm so sorry about your temperature drop though and i hope it's a fluke or if not, that you get a BFP next month. I'm hoping really hard for you!

Brichole, no! sniff. I was still hopeful because your cycle went a little longer. I love how you still manage to find the positive things in this though. Yes, your cycle has gotten longer so that is good. Hopefully, this next month, we see a lot more BFPs. I expect everyone here to get a BFP. No disappointments, right? 

RCR, ugh to the drugs not being covered. We're having trouble with coverage too although it seems like eventually it will be covered. However, we get bills and the prices are crazy. But we then call our insurance company and then they say that things will be covered so that makes me feel better. As for drugs, you know, i have a stash of drugs that I didn't use and i actually don't know what to do with them. I mean I just don't want them to go to waste considering how much they cost. I should check the expiration date anyway...but I have gonal f, menopur, ganerilix and endometrin. It's crazy...it's like a fertility clinic in my house. I'll write to the girls on the ivf forum to see what everyone did with their leftover drugs. 

Good for you for deactivating Facebook! I had a really annoying encounter on Facebook. One of my friends just announced her pregnancy but she did it in such a way where she made it seem like she wasn't happy that she got "knocked up". I was reading that and thinking about how it could be so heartbreaking to read for people like us who deal with infertility. I definitely am not announcing anything on Facebook. I just don't know who I would be hurting if I made a mass announcement  (half my "friends" on Facebook are acquaintances, not real friends anyway!) and I can just send emails to those friends that I really want to know. 

Shesaidboom, YOU GO GIRL! That is amazing that you already lost 4 pounds. You're well on your way. And what a great goal to have. Are you doing it by yourself or are you using some kind of service like weight watchers? I'm really happy for you and I'm hopeful that not only do you lose the weight but that you get your free baby on this next month off. that would be a perfect way to start a new year. 

Chica, I hope you're feeling better today, especially when you're not out with that couple. I can't believe you had the patience to deal with them! Wow, you really are a saint! They would have driven me  haha But anyway, one day soon, you will also be buying the flowy tops when you get your BFP. I am looking forward to that day. 

Sekenamoon, I hope the next 7 days fly by what with the new years coming upon us :o) Let us know how things progress. 

I know i missed some people so for that, i apologize (Gozal how are you doing?) but I am thinking of everyone and hoping that we get some wonderful news soon (and mass BFPs at that!)

AFM, not much to say but I wanted to just let you guys know that. :o) I have a check up tomorrow so I'm looking forward to that. My nausea is pretty much gone (just a little lingering once in a while) and so, besides my appetite, slightly sore breasts, and larger tummy (which, by the way, just makes me look fat, not pregnant) I have no sign of the pregnancy. I know it's normal for the symptoms to go away but I really want to know what is happening in there. oh well, I'll check in and let you guys know what's happening after my appointment on Friday! Until then, I hope everyone is doing well and getting ready to celebrate the new year. I think 2012 is going to be a great year for everyone...

[jukim]

Hey ladies, didn't realise a new thread was up and kicking.

You could add me: Married to DH since 1/1/09...TTC #1 since 11/11...Battling Hyperthyroidism since 04/11...the thought of it being a long journey is unnerving, but God is gracious.

AFM: On CD12 ...Trying to remain calm, relaxed and stress free for my third try. Sigh!

Hoping for a "BFP 2012" for all of us!!!!

[brichole1214]

GRRRRRRRR....I just wrote an entire post and my computer just deleted it!!! I'm going to start over now so i don't throw something thru the screen!!!

Jukim & Teresaresa:  I have added your blurbs today ladies, if there is anything else i need to change please let me know :)  I hope your stays are short but i hope you are able to make friends here like i have.  I never would of made it thru my fertility treatments without the ladies here!!! This is my second round thru the thread, but i'm excited to be able to go thru my journy with other women who know and understand what it's like to struggle!!!

Renavoo:  I hope that your baby appointment goes good tomorrow!  Please let us know how the little Twinkles are doing!!!  when will you have the U/S to find out the sex of the babies?

rcr:  I do know where you are talking about and i hope that you have a great trip!!! I'm actually jealous lol...I think everyone i know is going on a trip soon and i wanna go!!! LOL

Deborah:  How are you doing?  When is your next appointment for the twins?

Shesaidboom, Cbaa, gem, sourire, chicajones:  I hope you ladies are doing well!! I know i've been a downer the past couple of days but i'm trying to be better with getting my BFNs lately!!!  Please know that even if i'm not on here doing personals all of the time i am here reading and keeping up with everyone!!! I can't post from my Kindle Fire, but I can update better from my phone now that I FINALLY updated my phone lol.  I will probably have to do most of my posting from DD's netbook or my phone starting the first of the year because i'll be starting my job at the new building..

AFM:  I have come to terms with the fact that AF is on her way here.  I am still only just spotting right now but i'm sure she is on her way for her week visit.  I am armed with 80 that's right 80 OPKS lol and 20 hpts...so i'm just so ready for all of us to graduate before summer 2012!!!

[teresaresa]

Renavoo: Thank you so much for your encouragement! I'm actually in Westchester County, so I started at clinic in Columbus Circle and then switched to their WC campus. Are we allowed to name names on here? Don't know the rules. I liked the doctors, but the follow-up was horrific and no one seemed to have time to explain things. Since I was skittish about getting help to begin with, it wasn't a great match for me. I love my new Dr. He's the gentlest, kindest man, and I feel like he actually listens to me. Plus, his results are apparently ah-mazing! The funny thing is that he doesn't tell me what's next. He wants me to focus on what we're doing in the moment which I think is good. He didn't tell me ahead of time that I would be doing an IUI this last cycle - I probably would have driven myself nuts with worry if I had known an IUI was on the table. I went in for my CD14 u/s and he said: one excellent follicle and one very good follicle; excellent uterus lining; post-coital test was not so good, so we want you to come in for an IUI. Yeah, the Clomid completely dried out my cm.... boo. So, he originally said that he would only keep me on Clomid for three months. But, at my CD14 visit he asked about any side effects and I told him about some hot flashes and itchiness. I think he may try me on a different drug this month. I'm supposed to go in tomorrow for baselines, but AF hasn't yet arrived. I tend to be overly anxious that if I don't get things just right then we'll lose a cycle. So, the dr.'s office is closed this Sat-Sun-Mon for the holiday. If I don't get AF today, then I'll have to cancel tomorrow's appointment. But, then if AF comes tomorrow, I won't get to see the dr. for my baselines until CD5. Is CD 5 OK? Am I needlessly worrying? Ack! So, that's where I am! Can I ask where you did your IVF? Also, as for extra drugs.... have you ever been on the RESOLVE-NYC board? There are tons of women on there who don't have insurance and there is always a lot of drug exchange happening there. It might be easier to connect with someone else in the City.

Brichole: Thanks for adding me! I hope my stay is short too :) It will be nice to connect with folks who actually know what I'm talking about!!!

Shesaidboom: Congrats on your weight loss!!! I certainly don't mind your weight talk as I too am contending with the issue. I lost 27 pounds over the summer, but the holidays have been torturous. Time to get back on track! Let me know if you need/want a cheerleader!!!

Facebook/insensitive friends: One of my best friends got pregnant on her honeymoon in September. The start of the pregnancy was a little scary, so I knew from the beginning. She knows all about my struggle. She announced the baby to friends and family via an email at 10 weeks that said, We have one more thing to be thankful for this year! and had an u/s photo attached. Then a week or two later she posted on FB: When I asked my husband what he wanted for Christmas he said, " What could I possibly want? I have a wife, a house and a baby." (Oh, btw, they had NOT yet closed on the purchase of their house). Something about it made me go insane. And ever since then, she's been posting every few days with things like, "Finally got our cable set up. Have to squeeze in all of our TV watching before our world gets turned upside down in 5 months." She literally posts something like this every other day.  I love her dearly, but it's a little excessive!  I don't know if I can disconnect completely, but I may have to hide her. Deep breath, and sigh.

Have a great Thursday all!!

[deborahbgkelly]

Renavoo- I am also in that "I just look fat, not pregnant" stage. I read some good advice which is to get the shirts that accentuate the belly so it looks more like a bump and also to hold yourself in the typical pregnancy positions (like hand on lower back and above stomach), if you are ready for people to know. Brichole- Today I have a blood draw and this coming Wednesday I have my OB visit. Not entirely sure what they will do since I've had all the history done and things like that. I imagine we'll talk about what the plan is for the pregnancy and maybe he'll do an ultrasound (but I'm not sure since I just had one at 9 weeks 1 day). I'll get to other people later, but I have to get dressed and get out of here so I can get to the clinic before 10 (otherwise we have to wait until tomorrow for results).

[brichole1214]

GRRRRR 15DPO and still just BARELY spotting...but it was really pink last night...CAN AF PLEASE JUST HURRY UP AND SHOW UP!!!!!!!!!!  ok, sorry, i just keep going to the bathroom thinking she's here and of course NOTHING...i'm getting tired of the waiting game...i wanna get this over with so i can start my next cycle!!!

[MegEliz]

Ok - i think i am going to join in over here :) Meg - 36 (soon to be 37 YIKES) trying to conceive #3 for 3 YEARS- yep pretty annoying - anyways i had a mc in 6/10 at 8 weeks and then again in 2/11 at 8 weeks. Found out that i have Factor V, Was on clomid for six months to help me ovulate more regularly. I ovulated but no pregnancy. I finally am just trying to be a bit more zen. part of me wants to be more aggressive but then the other part is scared of that route. Dh isnt too keen on that route either.. lol... I am hoping to find hope and knowledge here!

[brichole1214]

Hey Meg, WELCOME!! I will add your blurb tomorrow when i get to work...my youngest is running around driving her older sister crazy!!!  I just wanted to welcome you to our little but growing group of wonderful ladies! Looking forward to getting to know you and when i get a chance i will add more!!!

[toothfairy2be]

 Welcome everyone!

Got my negative beta today :( It wasn't a surprise, but it still sucks.

I have read everyones posts but I just don't have time for personals today. I will be gone til Monday but I will be thinking of you all.

http://shop.cafepress.com/fertility-drugs    I had to share this, I love the tote bag!

[brichole1214]

Cbaa:  Sending out lots of hugs and love your way!  I hope that AF can get here soon so you can get your next cycle started!!!

Renavoo:  Impatiently waiting on your update on the babes!!!

AFM:  AF FINALLY showed up this morning....full force...so i'm calling today CD1 and will be starting my OPKs on CD6 more than likely just to make sure i catch my O!!!! I hope everyone has a very wonderful weekend!!! HAPPY NEW YEAR EARLY!!!

[wissa19]

cbaa - Sorry hear the new about your negative beta :( - (Yes. I was stalking you as I thought it was around the time for you test)

[shesaidboom]

rcr - thanks. I have more motivation this time - every time I want to indulge I just think of being pregnant and know it's not worth it. When I'm back on the treatments it will be much harder, because they tend to make me bloat and the progesterone makes me so hungry!
Yay for the green light! I'm sorry for the insurance problems though. Have a great holiday!

brichole - I'm so sorry. I hope this next cycle works out much better (or are you breaking for the surgery?). I definitely think we all need those BFPs before the summer! We need a lot of graduates.

Gemmine - we're off this month because the clinic closed for the holidays on Dec. 20 and isn't opening again until Jan. 12. I'm on day 9 right now, so there was no way to get in a medicated cycle. Thanks for the good luck with my weight loss goals! I hope I'm able to lose enough to help my body want to get pregnant.
I'm sorry to hear your temp dropped and AF will be here. Not charting is much less stressful, you're right. I hope the RE can give you some good news when you get in!

teresaresa - welcome to the thread! I hope your stay is short and that you're able to get the support you need while you wait for your BFP. I can relate to the factory feeling RE office. I feel that way about mine sometimes.
Congratulations on your weight loss over the summer! That's awesome. A cheerleader would be awesome :)
Your facebook friend sounds very insensitive. I understand she's happy, which is great, but hiding her updates would probably be a good thing.

renavoo - I'm doing it myself. I had no success with programs like weight watchers (I know they help a lot of people though!). I'm at a loss of 5 lbs now, so hopefully it won't be too hard to do 10 in Jan. I'm hoping it does help my body want to be pregnant.
I'm glad the nausea is gone! Good luck at your appointment.

jukim - When are you testing? In two days? I hope you get your BFP!

Meg - welcome! I'm sorry you've had such a long wait with #3. I Hope you get your BFP very soon and don't need to stay long. We're here to support you however we can while you're here!

cbaa - I'm so sorry. I'll be thinking of you.

AFM, I'm having a really hard time today. A friend of mine who tends to copy basically everything I do (I know imitation is the highest form of flattery, but it does get quite frustrating) just announced that he and his wife are TTC. I know it's selfish for me to be upset over it, but I am. I don't want them to have any trouble because at the end of the day they are friends and I don't want anyone to have to go through what we do, but I am going to be devastated if they get their positive before we do. I made the mistake of sharing our baby names with them, and I know they liked them, so there's that too. A stupid thing to worry about, I know, but there it is. I'm almost embarassed to admit it, but I know you guys will understand, even if you think I'm being childish.

I'm on CD 9 right now, and dp and I are DTD every second day just to make sure we catch that O, if I do ovulate without medication. I'm watching signs, but gave up on charting because I have a cold that is throwing my temps off.

[SilaMarila]

I would like to be added to the thread.

Blurb: SilaMarila(25), DH(29), TTC#2 since 12/10. Long cycles and infrequent ovulation. No diagnosis. Using acupuncture (since 6/11) and holding off on fertility meds for now.

Hi. I "know" and recognize many you. I'm so sorry you are still here. 

My story - We conceived DS "spontaneously" with out fertility treatments with my irregular cycles after 11 months. This time around I'm ovulating far less frequently than I was then. We are now moving into our 14th month of trying. With the help of acupuncture my cycles have gone from 70-80 days to 50-60 days. I have had blood work done 3 times, every time I'm within the "normal range". I had an u/s done in October and it showed no cysts or major abnormalities. I do have a lot of follicles. I was diagnosed with irregular cycles. That is the only testing we've done. Instinct still suspects pcos but I guess they would have seen cysts? My major worry is that with my long cycles and trouble ovulating, that my eggs are obviously not maturing properly resulting in poor egg quality. Plus the fact that by the time I actually ovulate my lining is so old that there are less nutrients for anything to implant and survive if we were to fertilize an egg. I feel this has been proven true since we managed to catch one of my illusive eggs and had a chemical pregnancy (4wk4day loss) in June. A low does of Clomid might do the trick. However we are both wary of the side effects and just don't feel like that is what we are supposed to do yet. I hope to learn a lot more about treatments and meds from you guys! I have my annual pap on the 9th and I have a lot of questions and am going see if I can get a second opinion and maybe a referral to a good RE that will do a few other tests (I want to do all testing before just starting meds).

[jukim]

Shesaidboom thanks for asking but i should be ovulating somewhere between the 1st to 4th January and AF is due around the 15th. 

Edited by jukim - 12/31/11 at 4:29am

[toothfairy2be]

Welcome Sila! I'm sorry youre still around too, but, I'm glad you are here & we can catch up again.

Shesaidboom- it isn't childish, I'd feel the same way. I never.' Wish' infertility on anyone, I just want mine first!

Posting from my long car ride, sat in.NYC traffic for 2 hours, yuck!

Thank you for stalking me wissa! Wish I had better news, will you stay & join us?

[skeemama]

My DH said to me tonight that he thinks we hit the jackpot....I complained about the smell of dinner and did not finish my coffee today(its a small & half caf).  

I laughed and said I could only hope, however there is no way I'd have preggo symptoms because we would have just gotten knocked up last weekend.  

UMMMM, maybe I am just cranky & busy. 

I think he is trying to lighten the mood...it is very cute.

[renavoo]

HI Ladies!

Wow, lots happening....

First, welcome Silamarila and MegEliz! I hope that you find all the help you need here. I hope that we can help! 

Sila, I had 3 clomid cycles and 1 femora cycle. There's a range of symptoms with clomid...I experienced some slight nausea but generally, I felt really fine. There were other ladies on this thread who had much more noticeable side effects. Prior to taking clomid, my cycles ranged from 40-60 days and after that, my cycles ranged in the 28-32 day range so I was really happy. The one thing to watch out for, however, is the impact on your cervical mucus (Especially if you're not doing an IUI with it) and the impact on your uterine lining (my lining never really went beyond 5mm, which is not conducive to pregnancy). I hope you get followed during your cycles, if you finally do need to take meds (but here's hoping you get your baby without them!)

MegEliz, what is the more aggressive route you are considering?

Cbaa,  I'm so sorry about your BFP. I'm really upset for you. What is next for you? and UGH about NYC traffic. I hope you got home relatively quickly after getting past NYC!

Skee, I hope that your DH is right! We need a BFP to start off the year!

Shesaidboom, I second Cbaa, I don't think it's childish at all. I think it's absolutely normal to feel that way. It's funny because my friend announced to me that he and his wife are going to start trying soon and i had the same reaction as you...I was thinking that I would be annoyed if they got pregnant before me, especially since DH and i had been trying for 2 years. Although I'm now pregnant and I hope they don't face the same issues that DH and i face, sometimes, I think it would be a slap in the face if they got pregnant really quickly. Some people just don't have to try hard at all while others like us put our lives into it. haha then I remember that I really do love my friends so I hope they get pregnant quickly. I wonder if my these are mood swings?

Brichole, I can't believe I'm happy that your AF is here but waiting is sometimes the most painful part! Ok, so I'm now waiting anxiously for your O date and for you to get your BFP! Please let this month be the month for you!! You have your surgery for next month, right? haha sorry, I'd rather you were pregnant first :o)

Theresa, definitely hide your friend. ugh, even if I wasn't pregnant or trying, i would find that annoying. It's amazing how people will post the most inane things thinking that everyone is interested in their day to day happenings...cable set up?! And then posting about their pregnancy so often?? Sorry  Some people are just so insensitive. As for the IVF, I actually went out of state to MD- a clinic called Shady Grove. The clinic has a money back guarantee (6 fresh cycles for you to bring a baby home) for 19K. If it doesn't work within 6 cycles or if you don't like them, they will refund the money automatically. We actually used up one fresh cycle and one frozen cycle before getting pregnant so I think they probably made money on us :o) But we don't really care because we finally got pregnant (and hopefully, will have our babies in about 6 months) i also joke that our babies wanted to give us our money's worth so we have twins...i always only wanted two children anyway! by the way, thanks for the tip on RESOLVE NYC. I'll look that up.

Jukim, wishing you luck on your third try.

Deborah, haha I am wearing nice flowy tops. My friends all know but I still have to announce it at work. I am planning to do that once we get back to the office though so then I don't have to worry about hiding it anyway. Hope you're feeling well!

Brichole, just in answer to your question, the babies are doing well, thanks for asking! Although we weren't supposed to do an US, the doctor (I go to a multi doctor practice so this was a new doctor) was hilarious and decided that he couldn't JUST do a doppler because he wouldn't know whether he was hearing baby A or baby B. So, he did an impromptu US which DH and I were happy about just so we could be sure they were ok. Which they were. So for now, I'm calm again although I'm sure in a couple of days i'll start worrying again. I'll be back to see the doctor in 3 weeks now- he moved it to 3 weeks because he thinks everything is going well so he didn't feel the need to see me in 2 weeks. He did say that the babies require a fetal echo because IVF babies may have additional issues so I'm guessing he'll be doing that at week 20. (no indication of any issue but this practice seems really aggressive with twins and with IVF babies)

Ladies, I hope everyone rings in the new year with lots of joy and hope. It's going to be a good 2012 for all of us because i expect to see a lot of BFPs this year!