Edited to delete post (I can't figure out how to delete the whole thing). I didn't realize the TCAC wasn't supposed to discuss religion and I don't want to break any rules :-)
No point arguing or trying to convince anyone. In fact, I probably would have waited till after the birth to tell them (if they asked.) He's your son--end of story.
No matter how much of a stink they raise now, or even for the next year+, yes, it will eventually blow over. My dad's family is Jewish. He and my mom chose not to circ any of my 3 brothers, and apparently caught hell for it with the first son. But they stood their ground, eventually people realized that was that, and nobody ever mentioned it again after that first blow-up.
You're not doing it. There's really nothing to discuss...
Oh how frustrating. I feel your pain, my mother's a Rabbi and she practically lost her $#!% when I informed her we would NOT be cutting off ANY of my son's body parts. Maybe provide them with the link above.
In the end, though, I agree with radicaleel, it's your baby, your decision, nothing left to discuss. If your DH wont say that to them (which he should because presumably he is on board with the no circ'ing and they are, afterall HIS parents), then you should. If they bring it up again remind them the issue is not up for discussion and change the subject...they will get it eventually.
Good Luck mama and congrats on the baby, and your decision to leave him intact! Your instincts are dead on, don't forget that!!
We aren't supposed to debate religious circing here but I agree with both previous posters. My dh was raised Jewish.. though he's non observant.. it was a big deal to say "no" to this tradition. But we did and even though they gave us hell, it blew over.
i'm not jewish and haven't BTDT (w/ regards to jewish pressure) but i have BTDT with the same situation in general. i agree that you should just.stop.talking.about.it. with them. but you will probably find that they continue to badger you and harass you.
from my read of your situation, this is **because** you caved to their pressure with son #2. they "know" you have it in you to go through with a bris, and they know that they harassed you into doing it last time.
what they **don't** know is that you now have it in you to refuse this time. you are simply going to have to show them that you will refuse.
stick to your guns. stop listening to their stories. when they corner you and start barking anecdotes and false "knowledge", simply stop listening. think (or even say outloud, if you're daring) -- "OK, here's what i'm hearing: blah, blah, blah, blah, blah."
if necessary, remove yourself from the situation.
but, yeah, i'd say you are set up for continuous confrontation from them for the remainder of your pregnancy, seeing as though you went through this already, and they "won" you over last time.
it will be a real challenge for you to stick to it, but i know you can do it!! just keep reading this forum for lots of help and reinforcement.
oh, and congratulations on your son! he is LUCKY to have you, saving him from unnecessary harm.
Thanks for your replies ladies! I think you are right - I am just not going to discuss it with them any further. I'm sticking to my decision that's that! :-)
Thanks for your replies ladies! I think you are right - I am just not going to discuss it with them any further. I'm sticking to my decision that's that! :-)
Isn't it sad when people have to fight so hard with loved ones about NOT mutilating their children? Hopefully the US will wake up soon enough. Thankfully circ rates are on a decline nationally.
Isn't it sad when people have to fight so hard with loved ones about NOT mutilating their children? Hopefully the US will wake up soon enough. Thankfully circ rates are on a decline nationally.
And this is one of the reasons why circ, for any/all reasons, persists. Pressure from those you love & trust is a very powerful thing. Unfortunately, it often overrides the mother's instinct to protect her child.
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