1) If you are someone who tends to get blue after the holidays, what things do you do to cope? It seems most years (extended) family drama seems to rear its ugly head and this year was no exception. And a few people did some particularly hurtful things to me and I am just really feeling down to the point where I just don't want to see anyone from my family (other than my husband and children) but this is a challenge because this is the time of year when aunts and uncles and grandparents want to visit with my children and take them places. It is fine--I am not going to stop that--but I am having trouble dealing with people myself.
2) My brother, and others too, are often heard to say things like "well, it's family and that is the most important thing" and if you don't agree with him, you are the problem. Again for clarification, he is talking about extended family. He is married but with no children yet FWIW. Does anyone feel like giving their thoughts on this concept of "but it's family..."? No offense or judgment taken!
To him, "family is the most important thing" means doing things like making nice and re-arranging plans and ignoring all differences and avoiding unsafe topics and confrontation because "it's family" and we should all be spending time together whenever possible.
It also, for him and his wife, often includes a fair amount of lying, because no one can possibly do all these things and not offend someone somehow. (We have a big family). Well, my husband and I do not believe in lying for any reason--even little white lies or being deceptive for the sake of appearances. And again, it seems that to make nice and not offended anyone, lying is what a lot of people do. But lying is not fail-safe by any stretch. So inevitably someone finds out and all the hurt they were trying to avoid happens anyway.
Anyway, that was rambling. But does anyone get where I am going? I would love to hear anyone's thoughts on this. Maybe I am just a social misfit--ok, well I know I am that lol!