i can't figure myself out, but whatever it is is making me feel bad. when i or my children receive a gift that is not needed or fitting to us, i feel bad. bad that that person spent money on something that won't get used. i feel guilty donating, regifting, or returning. i've even felt a little guilt over exchanging due to size! it makes me feel like i'm not being grateful. today i silently cursed the stuffed animal my daughter received in the mail. no one in our family plays with stuffed animals. i feel guilty for not wanting it but also bad that my friend spent her money for something that will get no use in our house (though she'll never know that). it also bothers me when dh spends more than i would on a gift for me. e.g he bought me a beautiful shirt sold locally made all organic and earth-friendly. it cost a small fortune. i love it, but i would NEVER spend that kind of money on one article of clothing for myself. now i feel guilty for owning something like that. feel like though i really could use more clothes that i can't go out and buy more due to the expensive shirt that i now own. oh, i could drive myself nuts.
is it possible to be so frugal that you really can't enjoy gift-giving. i feel like it's too impractical for me or something and i HATE that i feel that way. if i know of something that someone would love, then i love to get it for them, but buying for the sake of buying is hard for me.
all of these things just have me in a tizzy right now, and i'll come down after all the holiday stuff is completely passed (we have one more family engagement friday night). but it'll be back next year. how can i get past this and enjoy the whole aspect of gift exchanging more?