Struggling with thought of being able to homeschool with my kids....can someone that has btdt help?

[DeChRi]

I have a 12 yr old loving public school and she will stay there.  I have a 4 yr old we are thinking we would like to homeschool.  She is incredibly bright and focused, but has some health needs that have her feeling lousy a lot, so there are times of the day she needs to just be able to feel bad, and times/days she feels much better and absorbs things like a sponge.  We also have a 19 month old who has the same health condition.  She is also wonderfully bright but because she was sick much earlier, she struggles with some sensory issues, is in loads of OT and feeding therapy, etc.  She requires a level of attention I never thought possible.  I literally cannot sit down to do a single focused activity with my 4 year old, ever, without my 1 yr old destroying things or getting frustrated that she can't do it and starts banging her head on the floor.  Our hope, of course, is that both of them get to a point the feel better, that our 1 yr old continues improving, etc.  We also have our 4th and final due this spring. 

I guess I am wondering....if I can't even get through a 15 min painting project or a 10 min round of freaking playdough right now, what on earth makes me think I can homeschool my 4 yr old with my 1 yr old "helping" :)....any wisdom?

[onatightrope]

FWIW, a 4 year old doesn't need to do seatwork.  In lots of places, children do no formal schoolwork until age 7, and those kids do better on average on standardized testing than the US.  So even if you did nothing schooly for the next several years, your child would be just fine academically in the long term.  Life will change.  Don't stress too much about the short term.

In the meantime: Does your little one nap?  That can be a great time to do something special or more involved with your older one.  Or you could look for ways to add interest to your older one's life while another adult is available to watch your little one, like in evenings or weekends.   I don't know how your kids' health issues would affect this, but when mine were those ages, we did a lot of field trips.  Everyone loves the zoo, especially during the week when it's not crowded!  

[purslaine]

Well....a 4 yr old does not need anything beyond what you are probably doing.

Do you expect the health of your 19 month old to be easier to deal with as she ages?  

Here is what i would do with a 4 yr old:

library - once every week or 2 weeks

park - once a week (minimum)

another outing where she can be social:  church, drop-in groups, etc.

I would also carve out some time to make things you want to - such as playdoh.  Either make it once the toddler is in bed, or have your partner look after the toddler while you make it.  Is there anywhere you can keep supplies that the toddler cannot get - and is there anywhere for the 4 yr old to play with things uninterrupted?

Lastly, I would consider hiring the 12 yr old once a week or so to take the toddler for a walk or to the park.  You can get more done with the 4 yr old. 

Honestly, I would not expect to get much done with a 4 yr old, toddler, and baby - but very few children lose out by having their academics delayed a couple of years while the family ages/settles down.

Good luck, mama!

[DeChRi]

THank you so much for the thoughtful replies.  Both kids still nap, usually at the same time.  My 19 month old has some severe sleep issues, stemming from her comfort level, so she is up and down a lot.  BUT, I absolutely could use a sitter or my 12 yr old to help with the little.  We have one sitter that we are comfortable "managing" the 1 yr old. She should get easier to manage (if she doesn't hs may not be an option).

I think where my panic has set in is two fold.  One, my 4 y old is a knowledge hound....she wants to know everything.  She spends her days asking me to teach her to read, take apart the old VCR to see how it works, do flash cards, what makes the wind blow, etc.  I feel like I am missing some window to teach her SO many things.  My 12 yr old was the same and I just remember her Loving the learning we did....we went places, we did things, we learned to read.  I can barely go in public with my 19 month old who melts down. 

As I am typing I am coming to the realization that maybe I am more worried about what I can do with both of them NOW in general than officially homeschooling down the road.  See, MDC is great therapy. :)