Mama2ChicknLil: (Is that him in your avatar, btw? Too cute!) Steal away - I stole bits and pieces from here and there and cobbled together something that worked. I understand the concerns about giving his father some quality time. My husband leaves for his primary job at 7:30am and returns home at about 5:30am. He goes back to a second job at 7:30pm and comes home at midnight. The only time she gets to see her father Monday-Friday is between 5:30pm and 7:30pm - so I have her fed between 4:30pm-5:00pm, that feeding follows a nap which begins no later than 3pm, and I change her diaper when she goes down and wakes up - so when her father is at home there is nothing that interferes with his bonding time. Not feeding, not nap. She'd rather eat a little earlier, I think, but I distract and draaaagged it out until she accepted that time frame. I also relate to how you feel about co-sleeping... when we shopped for a bassinet Mr. was looking at models that, in our bedroom, would have been on an opposite wall. I admit I was hormonal, but I teared up at the idea of her being so far away (and cold, and lonely!), and we got the Dr. Sears co-sleeper, which is an awesome place to store her books and blankets while she sleeps in my arms. (I do use it for naps.) I know I was left alone at night, because I both remember and have been told that I had terrible night terrors and had to be strapped into bed. I do remember being strapped into bed. I had (and still have) nightmares and night terrors. I was never allowed into my parents' room, nevermind their bed, and I was not joined in the bedroom by an adult for any longer than it took for a parent to wake me from my nightmare or terror, inform me that my fear was unfounded and be instructed to go back to sleep. I will probably cry with her when she has her first bad dream. But I'm ready to respond differently. Hubs is OK with her being in the bed- and he's comfortable telling me when I've crossed that line between responding appropriately to *her* and giving *her* what she needs, including, in the future, the tools to sleep independently and simply trying to heal my own childhood by keeping her in my bed. Right now she's in my bed with me, or her co-sleeper strapped to my side of the bed, and will be until she's old enough for an adult bed... that's the plan. We're OK. You're doing a hard job, keep it up! Best of luck going back to work; I think it will be very hard, but I'm here to pep talk to you if you need or want it! :-)
As an aside, on the diaper changing mentioned by wishin'&hopin' - so, aside from poopy diapers overnight (a rare event for mine, knock on wood she's a morning pooper don'tknowhowtheheckIgotthatlucky), are we supposed to change diapers overnight? I slap an overnight on her and don't touch it again until morning - dragging her butt out into the cold air doesn't seem conducive to sleep, and Mama likes her sleep which mean Baby needs to stay asleep. Is this up for discussion? Am I doing a questionable thing by letting her marinate in her own juices from 8pm until 7am? I do wash her every day...
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