January Pagan Families - Page 4

[3xMama]

Originally Posted by FeralFox 

Redveg - That's my ex.  I'm 5'6", he's 5'5"ish and only a few pounds heavier.  And before him I was dating a boy who was an inch shorter and another 20 pounds lighter.  It's really nice to finally be with a man who doesn't make me feel like a big gangly monster.

3X - That's a good idea about the song.  With Badger, we had a book we read to him every night, but I'm not sure he really responds differently to it now.  Maybe we didn't do it enough.

Maia - You deserve a break sometimes too.  There's no reason why the school should get the full benefit of his meds each and every time.

Ugh, sometimes I wonder why we all have kids.  Do the rewards really outweigh the hassles?  I had to leave work early last night because I was so sick I couldn't even walk down the hall without getting that "you're about to puke and there's nothing you can do about it" saliva thing.  And then today I'm walking around the college town I live in, seeing all these happy single people that can date who they want and go where they want and spend money on what they want, and feeling a little resentful that I never had any of that.  It's my fault and no one else's, but still.

Ya know, DS2 doesn't really respond to it too much anymore unless he's upset or tired. I think its something that slowly fades with time. But when he was in that fourth trimester age, it was kind of amazing how it would calm him down and shut him up. 

Ugh, kids. I feel ya. My bestie is a single woman without kids and wow do I envy her sometimes. She goes out and parties, eats out, buys herself things just because, dates...*sigh* I'd love to be able to do a lot of that stuff. DH and I missed out on a lot of it since we were so young when we started having kids. And then there are the bad days when they run around screaming with streaming snot noses and poo running down their leg...(not that that happened to me today...twice...). Just compounds the frustration. But then they curl up with you and give you sticky kisses and say they love you and it makes things at least a little better. Until the next poo explosion at least...

Originally Posted by StevensMommy 

Feral- I am so happy for you! I do hope the nausea cuts back though- that can be really rough. And I hear ya when it comes to big babies- told my midwife I was having a minimum 8 pounder, she kept swearing my DS was 7.5 MAX. I was right he he heee...

My midwife will guess at size and weight, but maintains that mom knows best and will take into account what mom thinks more than what she thinks. :) 

Originally Posted by LionessMom 

feral- go easy on  yourself. all these feelings are normal. you are having hormonal fluctuations. they will make you feel all these things. 2 pregnancies i was happy and never a worry and 2 pregnancies i was always sad, negative, and disconnected for the first 20 weeks. i am still having problems being happy. i am stressed out and not dealing very well. keep telling yourself that these are hormonal feelings and try not to take them too seriously. do not dwell on the thoughts. it gives them power. acknowledge you had them, then let them flow on their way. holding on to them makes the bigger stronger and attracts more to you. it is all hormones making normal worries and upsets worse. it will not last forever. it will let up and get easier and of course melt away when you see your baby for the first time. pm me if you want. i only want to remind you of this bc i am going through the same thing. just today for the first time i felt a glimmer of expectant joy. i hope it gets stronger as i go. bc with the last one i already had it full force. i am 15 weeks now. 

Very well said!!!!

I think I'm going to take on a room a month this year and work through my house doing deep cleaning. Like washing the floor boards, windows and walls and re-organizing. I'm going to do some research and after its all clean, organized and sparkly, I'm going to do some sort of cleansing/blessing ritual and set up a talisman to guard the room. I'm not totally sure how that will work, like I said I need to research it more. But I'm pretty excited about this project! Hopefully it will go more or less smoothly. And who knows, maybe I will blog about it!! Probably not, but its a nice thought. 

Oh and yesterday was beautiful here--55 and sunny, very unusual. I was able to open the windows for a few hours (not to mention send the kids outside for a few hours!) so I did a quick smudge through the house. I was very thankful for the weather and fresh air! The smudge seems to have worked and since it was a last minute thing and my house was a wreck instead of neat and tidy like I would've preferred, I've also put a half an onion in each room to collect any lingering negativity. I'll collect them at three days and bury them at the back of our property, asking Mother Earth to take and cleanse the negativity. Hopefully that will get rid of all the ickies that have invaded our house. 

[Maiasaura]

Originally Posted by redveg I have 2 that take turns doing this.  Thank the Gods it's never on the same day!  My DD has eased up a bit but she is still the sort who will have a major emotional breakdown that turns into yelling, stomping, nitpicking every word literally  fighting that never ends.  The same conversation forever if we don't agree because she thinks if we don't agree we haven't heard her or something.  Yet she can only see her side.  I am at the point where I just let her have her say and come back to the discussion when she has calmed down.  Now my DS, he is the type who corrects everything, including your sentence structure and only see's things in Black or White. There is only right or wrong and if it can be proven through science that's a big one.  My DS was a lot like my DD when he was younger but has calmed a bit.  He has an outlet though, martial arts and I think that helps a bit though there are some days itjust starts out bad and ends that way.  With my DD I have had some conversations that have ended and started the next day.  There are even a few topics we won't talk with her about because of how out of control she gets.

Dang, that's not encouraging at all So wait, though-- Your one that can only see her side, or your DS who corrects everything; mine is a combo of those two. Yesterday I said "Is it more important to be kind, or to be right?"-- I think he is still too young to get that. But he's smart enough to consider it.

Sigh.

Originally Posted by DaughterOfKali Maia-  I really can relate. Truly.  My son is like that, too.  I'm actually going to call for a therapy appointment (for myself) on Monday.  Ds is simply wearing me out.  And yep, my BP is on the rise...even though I'm on meds for it.

So-- what do you do? When he gets like that? I mostly scream my fool head off, because mostly ds will not shut up under pain of death, and after a point, his voice is like an icepick in my ear...and when we have nothing to do, I can go in my room and put in earplugs and try to calm down, but usually he pulls this shite when we have exactly one hour to get out the door for school, or when he has to get to bed on a weeknight. Heavy sigh.

Originally Posted by FeralFox Maia - You deserve a break sometimes too.  There's no reason why the school should get the full benefit of his meds each and every time.

Ugh, sometimes I wonder why we all have kids.  Do the rewards really outweigh the hassles?  I had to leave work early last night because I was so sick I couldn't even walk down the hall without getting that "you're about to puke and there's nothing you can do about it" saliva thing.  And then today I'm walking around the college town I live in, seeing all these happy single people that can date who they want and go where they want and spend money on what they want, and feeling a little resentful that I never had any of that.  It's my fault and no one else's, but still.

Ture that, I do need a break, too, but if the school doesn't get the benefit of the meds, I don't get that 6-hour break on weekdays-- because they call me. About his behavior. And that's almost worse than having to just deal directly with it. Plus, he gets another med when he gets home, which bumps us into the early evening. I always keep some in the car in case we're out and about and I have to give him some.

I do think the rewards outweigh the hassles, most days. I don't want to be single anymore, I don't want to be dating anyone else, I have nowhere I really want to go. I got all that out of my system before I had ds, but then, I had him at 41. Plus, remember, Feral-- you don't know that all those people are happy. You are comparing your insides to other people's outsides. We really have no idea the struggles other people are going through. Or the lengths they go to to hide them.

Your life is exactly yours. Try to find the small gratitudes, sweet one. When I'm feeling that funky, I go on a blessing walk-- it's going to sound utterly silly, but I have gone out the door SO freaking angry. I start walking and I say "bless ds, bless mom, bless her bf, bless M, bless J, bless G, bless..." you get it. As soon as I think of one person to bless, I think of all the people connected with them-- Mom's boyfriend, M's brothers and sisters, even though I don't know them, ds's classmates and their siblings and their parents and all the people I know who have died, and their families, people in the media, celebrities, and on and on and on. Usually by the time I'm done, 1/2 hour later, I don't feel so angry anymore.

Originally Posted by StevensMommy Maia- I wish I could help. I had a couple of cousins that I used to live with that were the exact same way and all I wanted to do was shoot them. Of course knowing my luck my son will acquire my attitude and be just as dry and acerbic as I am...

I wish you could, too. Want to babysit? For a week?

Originally Posted by LionessMom feral- go easy on  yourself. all these feelings are normal. you are having hormonal fluctuations. they will make you feel all these things. 2 pregnancies i was happy and never a worry and 2 pregnancies i was always sad, negative, and disconnected for the first 20 weeks. i am still having problems being happy. i am stressed out and not dealing very well. keep telling yourself that these are hormonal feelings and try not to take them too seriously. do not dwell on the thoughts. it gives them power. acknowledge you had them, then let them flow on their way. holding on to them makes the bigger stronger and attracts more to you. it is all hormones making normal worries and upsets worse. it will not last forever. it will let up and get easier and of course melt away when you see your baby for the first time. pm me if you want. i only want to remind you of this bc i am going through the same thing. just today for the first time i felt a glimmer of expectant joy. i hope it gets stronger as i go. bc with the last one i already had it full force. i am 15 weeks now. 

This sounds like great advice, from someone who's had a couple of pregnancies Good stuff, Lioness. How's the van search going? How's DS's punishment going? How's your DH?
 

[LionessMom]

Originally Posted by Maiasaura 

This sounds like great advice, from someone who's had a couple of pregnancies Good stuff, Lioness. How's the van search going? How's DS's punishment going? How's your DH?
 

still cant find the right van. might have to drive almost 50 miles away :( but i am keeping the thought that the right one will come up with my searching eventually. 

DS is feeling sick. i have had it with his attitude. everything he says is disrespectful and rude sounding even though the words arent. he will probably be heavily grounded for awhile. i know some of it is the virus bc i felt like that and so did DH but i still cant stand it anymore. he argues about everything. even if he said it first. if i say it second it is still wrong. he feels pretty guilty about the accident. more so every day i cant find another van that will seat all of us. he realizes how much of a bind he put us in but i dont think he really learned a lesson. time will tell. he is getting better at dishes and folding laundry though....

Dh has another eye appt mon afternoon. he had ableed after surgery and so there is blood floating around inside his eye. it is dissipating on itsw own somewhat but he might need another surgery to filter it out if it doesnt completely clear up on its own. he still has to sleep sitting up. so when he wakes up the blood has pooled at the bottom. for a second or 2 when he wakes up he can see out of it. but like a snowglobe, if he moves a little it stirs up again. but it is good news bc he hasnt been able to see out of it since he was 15. and he could actually tell what stuff was. he might need glasses for that eye to get the most use out of it, but having any use is awesome. it looks very promising that he will get useable eyesight back in that eye. i just hope the blood clears by itself (not likely) instead of needing surgery again. i am fervently wishing for him. 

i have spent way too much time sitting on this computer looking for a van today. i have driven around (in borrowed vehicles) for 2 days now looking at all the car lots in my surrounding areas. nada. i am very particular about what will work for my family. i will have 2 in forward facing 5 pt harness seats and one in a rear facing convertible seat, plus a 16 yr old and a 8 yr old. i really need something that seats 8. i want a mini van. the one i had it was easy to get to the 3rd row. i had plenty of room to kneel down in front of the seats and buckle the kids, even when my belly got real big. i had a chevy venture. people have suggested all kinds of other vehicles. i appreciate that but most of them dont offer the same accessibilty. i like the chevy venture. ones just like it are the pontiac montana and the honda odyssey. but the 8 seat is an option and none of them in my area carry ones with that option. the bank said i could go up to $12,000 and keep my payment under $200 a month. stretches things a little but doable considering my insurance will be higher the newer the vehicle. so even with that range (all my vehicles have been under 5grand) i still cant find anything. it is just not available here. well except that one that had a leaky head gasket. i told him the only way i would buy it was if he fixed it first. he fixed all the minor stuff and wouldnt touch the head gasket. shady.

i am stressed over this and i thought it was the reason why i was all upset and disconnected from the pregnancy. but then yesterday i started feeling better about things. i thought i had been feeling the baby kick here or there for awhile but yesterday was definite. no mistaking that little pop against my insides. it seemed to melt me alittle. that and DD2 finally slept through the ight last night. my milk is gone and she was not happy. i tried sippy's with water, milk, etc. no go. finally got out the one bottle i own and tried milk or water in it. still no. bought some carnation instant vanilla breakfast and mixed it with milk. sucked it down and slept all night. i woke up a couple of times and had to check her breathing. didnt even roll over to cuddle once. like right before i got preggo. the carnation stuff is the only thing i could find with  not too much sugar and none of the other stuff we are intolerant of. i hope to wean her down to reg whole milk. i feel bad giving her the stuff but i think she needs it right now. she still doesnt each much and it has vitamins and stuff. i didnt even ask her doctor. all the kids stuff had stupid stuff in it that she is intolerant of. it is crazy. 

so there is a book on me. keeping my head up should be the title. love my mom, always has positive stuff to say :) doing one day at a time and trying not to dwell on the bad parts ;)

[Aeress]

Lioness- Car shopping is the worst. I hope you find something soon.

Feral- thinking of you

I read through the whole thread, finally. I lost track of what everyone was up to around page 3, so, sending love and light to those in need.

[vydalea]

Originally Posted by FeralFox 

So, the baby is still there and healthy.  We had an ultrasound today, and it turns out she's just so huge that she's making *me* bleed.  She's a full week ahead in size, but not developmentally ahead, so the dates are correct.  This is what I get for marrying a giant.  And maybe the Gods really were trying to teach me a lesson, because I feel much less disconnected from the baby now.  Hopefully the feeling will last.

So happy to hear this news, Feral.  I have no idea what you people with your big babies are going through. Z was 6-9 and is still in the 20th percentile for her height, the little peanut.  

Originally Posted by 3xMama 

I think I'm going to take on a room a month this year and work through my house doing deep cleaning. Like washing the floor boards, windows and walls and re-organizing. I'm going to do some research and after its all clean, organized and sparkly, I'm going to do some sort of cleansing/blessing ritual and set up a talisman to guard the room. I'm not totally sure how that will work, like I said I need to research it more. But I'm pretty excited about this project! Hopefully it will go more or less smoothly. And who knows, maybe I will blog about it!! Probably not, but its a nice thought. 

Oh and yesterday was beautiful here--55 and sunny, very unusual. I was able to open the windows for a few hours (not to mention send the kids outside for a few hours!) so I did a quick smudge through the house. I was very thankful for the weather and fresh air! The smudge seems to have worked and since it was a last minute thing and my house was a wreck instead of neat and tidy like I would've preferred, I've also put a half an onion in each room to collect any lingering negativity. I'll collect them at three days and bury them at the back of our property, asking Mother Earth to take and cleanse the negativity. Hopefully that will get rid of all the ickies that have invaded our house. 

3x, I'm doing a very similar cleaning regiment from now until April.  Getting into all of the "dark" spots that hide my junk, literally and figuratively, actually!  I didn't think of doing a blessing for each space but I love the idea.  Will you share anything interesting you find?

Also, like the onion collecting negativity.  I think that will need to happen with each room cleanse, too!!  Thanks for all the great ideas!! 

 

Originally Posted by Maiasaura 

I do think the rewards outweigh the hassles, most days. I don't want to be single anymore, I don't want to be dating anyone else, I have nowhere I really want to go. I got all that out of my system before I had ds, but then, I had him at 41. Plus, remember, Feral-- you don't know that all those people are happy. You are comparing your insides to other people's outsides. We really have no idea the struggles other people are going through. Or the lengths they go to to hide them.

Your life is exactly yours. Try to find the small gratitudes, sweet one. When I'm feeling that funky, I go on a blessing walk-- it's going to sound utterly silly, but I have gone out the door SO freaking angry. I start walking and I say "bless ds, bless mom, bless her bf, bless M, bless J, bless G, bless..." you get it. As soon as I think of one person to bless, I think of all the people connected with them-- Mom's boyfriend, M's brothers and sisters, even though I don't know them, ds's classmates and their siblings and their parents and all the people I know who have died, and their families, people in the media, celebrities, and on and on and on. Usually by the time I'm done, 1/2 hour later, I don't feel so angry anymore.

Very, very true comparing your insides to other's outsides.  I might have to tattoo that on my head.  I love the blessing walk, that is another fabulous idea.  I don't think it sounds silly at all focusing on changing your negative energy to positive by remembering the blessings you have in your life.  

I didn't get to chime in on your DS's beastly day but I do hope you get to have a nice massage and relax for a little bit.  I'm sorry that you have to have days like that and I'm sorry that your SON has to have days where he feels like that.  

Originally Posted by LionessMom 

i am stressed over this and i thought it was the reason why i was all upset and disconnected from the pregnancy. but then yesterday i started feeling better about things. i thought i had been feeling the baby kick here or there for awhile but yesterday was definite. no mistaking that little pop against my insides. it seemed to melt me alittle. that and DD2 finally slept through the ight last night. my milk is gone and she was not happy. i tried sippy's with water, milk, etc. no go. finally got out the one bottle i own and tried milk or water in it. still no. bought some carnation instant vanilla breakfast and mixed it with milk. sucked it down and slept all night. i woke up a couple of times and had to check her breathing. didnt even roll over to cuddle once. like right before i got preggo. the carnation stuff is the only thing i could find with  not too much sugar and none of the other stuff we are intolerant of. i hope to wean her down to reg whole milk. i feel bad giving her the stuff but i think she needs it right now. she still doesnt each much and it has vitamins and stuff. i didnt even ask her doctor. all the kids stuff had stupid stuff in it that she is intolerant of. it is crazy. 

so there is a book on me. keeping my head up should be the title. love my mom, always has positive stuff to say :) doing one day at a time and trying not to dwell on the bad parts ;)

Lioness, love love love that you felt the baby kick.  yayayay!!  the sweetest feeling, I think.  I wish for everything else in your life to realign best it can.  Good luck with the van search.  Car shopping sucks there is no two ways about it.  
 

redveg: what's the update on YodaMae?  

[thatgirliknew]

Subbing now, posting later when I'm not so tired and sick.

[revolting]

Originally Posted by FeralFox 

So, the baby is still there and healthy.  We had an ultrasound today, and it turns out she's just so huge that she's making *me* bleed.  She's a full week ahead in size, but not developmentally ahead, so the dates are correct.  This is what I get for marrying a giant.  And maybe the Gods really were trying to teach me a lesson, because I feel much less disconnected from the baby now.  Hopefully the feeling will last.

Yay!

So, I'm thinking about Imbolc. Generally, I treat it as a celebration that we are almost through the winter, but this year...it feels like winter never came. I always prefer rituals that focus on seasonal changes. Any thoughts? We're be making candles for sure, but I'm not sure what else.

[3xMama]

Originally Posted by LionessMom 

Dh has another eye appt mon afternoon. he had ableed after surgery and so there is blood floating around inside his eye. it is dissipating on itsw own somewhat but he might need another surgery to filter it out if it doesnt completely clear up on its own. he still has to sleep sitting up. so when he wakes up the blood has pooled at the bottom. for a second or 2 when he wakes up he can see out of it. but like a snowglobe, if he moves a little it stirs up again. but it is good news bc he hasnt been able to see out of it since he was 15. and he could actually tell what stuff was. he might need glasses for that eye to get the most use out of it, but having any use is awesome. it looks very promising that he will get useable eyesight back in that eye. i just hope the blood clears by itself (not likely) instead of needing surgery again. i am fervently wishing for him. 

i have spent way too much time sitting on this computer looking for a van today. i have driven around (in borrowed vehicles) for 2 days now looking at all the car lots in my surrounding areas. nada. i am very particular about what will work for my family. i will have 2 in forward facing 5 pt harness seats and one in a rear facing convertible seat, plus a 16 yr old and a 8 yr old. i really need something that seats 8. i want a mini van. the one i had it was easy to get to the 3rd row. i had plenty of room to kneel down in front of the seats and buckle the kids, even when my belly got real big. i had a chevy venture. people have suggested all kinds of other vehicles. i appreciate that but most of them dont offer the same accessibilty. i like the chevy venture. ones just like it are the pontiac montana and the honda odyssey. but the 8 seat is an option and none of them in my area carry ones with that option. the bank said i could go up to $12,000 and keep my payment under $200 a month. stretches things a little but doable considering my insurance will be higher the newer the vehicle. so even with that range (all my vehicles have been under 5grand) i still cant find anything. it is just not available here. well except that one that had a leaky head gasket. i told him the only way i would buy it was if he fixed it first. he fixed all the minor stuff and wouldnt touch the head gasket. shady.

i am stressed over this and i thought it was the reason why i was all upset and disconnected from the pregnancy. but then yesterday i started feeling better about things. i thought i had been feeling the baby kick here or there for awhile but yesterday was definite. no mistaking that little pop against my insides. it seemed to melt me alittle. that and DD2 finally slept through the ight last night. my milk is gone and she was not happy. i tried sippy's with water, milk, etc. no go. finally got out the one bottle i own and tried milk or water in it. still no. bought some carnation instant vanilla breakfast and mixed it with milk. sucked it down and slept all night. i woke up a couple of times and had to check her breathing. didnt even roll over to cuddle once. like right before i got preggo. the carnation stuff is the only thing i could find with  not too much sugar and none of the other stuff we are intolerant of. i hope to wean her down to reg whole milk. i feel bad giving her the stuff but i think she needs it right now. she still doesnt each much and it has vitamins and stuff. i didnt even ask her doctor. all the kids stuff had stupid stuff in it that she is intolerant of. it is crazy. 

so there is a book on me. keeping my head up should be the title. love my mom, always has positive stuff to say :) doing one day at a time and trying not to dwell on the bad parts ;)

Hoping your DH's eye appointment goes well! How awesome to be able to see out of that eye! If you don't mind my asking, what happened when he was 15?

Hooray for baby kicks! That's one of the most awesome feelings!! And sleep...ahhh sleep is so wonderful. Glad you're getting some. Good sleep will go miles in helping you feel better!

Crossing your fingers that you find a good van ASAP!

Originally Posted by vydalea 

So happy to hear this news, Feral.  I have no idea what you people with your big babies are going through. Z was 6-9 and is still in the 20th percentile for her height, the little peanut.  

3x, I'm doing a very similar cleaning regiment from now until April.  Getting into all of the "dark" spots that hide my junk, literally and figuratively, actually!  I didn't think of doing a blessing for each space but I love the idea.  Will you share anything interesting you find?

Also, like the onion collecting negativity.  I think that will need to happen with each room cleanse, too!!  Thanks for all the great ideas!! 

 DD was 8lbs 9oz at birth and definately my biggest! DS1 was 7/7 and DS2 was 7/2. Now DS2 is the biggest any of them were at a year. He's about to size up to 18 month clothes. Its all DH's side. My BIL is six feet six inches tall.  He's freaking gigantic!  I'm all of 5'3 and feel like a teeny little person next to him.

I will share anything I find! Spells, blessings, objects and whatever else I come across. 

I finished the onion thing today. I took them outside, asked Mother Earth to take them and then proceeded to pick up all the garbage from our yard, which was actually surprisingly large amount for a pretty small and clean yard. It does feel better in here and the colds are drying up. There have been a few family things that have come to the surface that were dealt with quickly, cleanly and without much guilt on my part, lol. I'm liking it! I can't wait for my friend who can see ghosts and auras and such come over this weekend and tell me what she thinks. 

Originally Posted by revolting 

So, I'm thinking about Imbolc. Generally, I treat it as a celebration that we are almost through the winter, but this year...it feels like winter never came. I always prefer rituals that focus on seasonal changes. Any thoughts? We're be making candles for sure, but I'm not sure what else.

Winter never came here, either. We kept getting predictions of the worst winter in years, huge amounts of snow etc etc etc. Instead we've barely dipped into the 30s, haven't even had an inch of snow or have it last more than 12 hrs. In fact, DD & DS1 have gone outside to play without wearing a coat!! Its a little weird...But its supposed to dip into the 20s and snow later this week and stay that way for the foreseeable future so who knows, by the time Imbolc comes around we'll see a seasonal change or two. 

This morning was DD's first day at her new school. We switched her because her first school did not seem to have a clue. It was a Montessori charter and lets just say its was more Lord of the Flies than Montessori. So we go outside so I can take DD to school and what is there but this beautiful, round, white, huge moon setting in the west. We were lucky enough to have it in sight the whole way to school and it really comforted DD, who was of course pretty nervous. She was glad to think that the Goddess was blessing her on the first day of school.  It was sweet. In the fifteen minutes between pulling into the parking lot, taking DD inside and coming back out, the sun had risen into a beautiful, crisp day. I'm taking that as a good omen for this school and the rest of the year. 

[Aeress]

We make candles, candy, and do the pooka pages.

So, what is everyone reading?

[Maiasaura]

Originally Posted by vydalea I didn't get to chime in on your DS's beastly day but I do hope you get to have a nice massage and relax for a little bit.  I'm sorry that you have to have days like that and I'm sorry that your SON has to have days where he feels like that.  

I don't know what his problem is. Surely you'd think it'd be easier to just get along. Today was another one! Half a freaking day of school, and he got written up in school because...get this, he didn't want to go outside for recess. Apparently he asked the asst.teacher if he could stay in the classroom and read his book. She said no, everyone has to stay together. Got outside, did a head count, DS was not there, he'd decided he had the right to stay in the classroom anyway.

And THEN, proceeded to make up a story, and believe it, that he'd asked and was given permission-by-omission (she didn't expressly say NO, she just said "everybody has to go out") and then gave major attitude about it. MAJOR. On his "infraction paper" you're supposed to finish questions/statements such as "What happened was..." and "My behavior affected others by..." and "Next time I will..." and his huge attitude shone right through on the paper So I made him write it over and when he did, it said "My mom throttled me against the wall", so I made him write a third one, and still he was crying and playing the victim. Amazing what he will go through, and put other people through...you'd really think behaving is easier.

M helped me through it in a major way. I'm much calmer, but why the eff does he have to do this???

Originally Posted by thatgirliknew Subbing now, posting later when I'm not so tired and sick.

MM and welcome Hope you feel better soon!

Originally Posted by revolting So, I'm thinking about Imbolc. Generally, I treat it as a celebration that we are almost through the winter, but this year...it feels like winter never came. I always prefer rituals that focus on seasonal changes. Any thoughts? We're be making candles for sure, but I'm not sure what else.

It feels like winter hasn't got here, yet, either. Now, normally being in WNC and in the south, we have a rather mild one anyway-- 30-40* in the day, 19* at night, snow sometimes but not more than an inch or so, which doesn't ever stick more than a day or two. We've had nothing. I'm wearing sweatshirts and a scarf in the daytime, and the scarf is shed by 2pm-ish latest. GRRR.

Originally Posted by 3xMama Hoping your DH's eye appointment goes well! How awesome to be able to see out of that eye! 

I'd totally forgotten that he had no sight in it at all. That is truly awesome. I hope you find a van soon! Lioness, why don't you try to find the same one you said you liked? Instead of a different kind?

Originally Posted by Aeress So, what is everyone reading?

I'm reading Vickie Lane "In A Dark Season". I loved her "Day of Small Things", as it takes place in my area, but I didn't realize this new one is a mystery. Oh well. I'm not a big mystery fan, but it's interesting, and it also takes place in my area, naming specific places and really capturing the accent.

[3xMama]

Originally Posted by Aeress 

So, what is everyone reading?

I just finished Troubled Waters by Sharon Shinn. Shinn writes a good solid fantasy story with a nice dose of romance to boot. She does a fabulous job of it. Now I'm ready Pathfinder by Orson Scott Card. DH is a huge Card fan and I enjoy his writing quite a bit as well. Jury is still out on Pathfinder as I'm not even three chapters in, but so far so good!

[Aubergine68]

Originally Posted by 3xMama 

I just finished Troubled Waters by Sharon Shinn. Shinn writes a good solid fantasy story with a nice dose of romance to boot. She does a fabulous job of it. Now I'm ready Pathfinder by Orson Scott Card. DH is a huge Card fan and I enjoy his writing quite a bit as well. Jury is still out on Pathfinder as I'm not even three chapters in, but so far so good!

I love Sharon Shinn and actually have Pathfinder out from the library for the second time.  Somehow, I thought it was a sequel.  May reread it - it has a really interesting premise! --  but my favorite Card novel is still Pastwatch.  I have a bunch of L. E. Modesitt novels out too, and have been rereading bits of the Tamora Pierce novels that my daughter has been signing out.

Just finished Lauren Oliver's Delirium, which is wonderful - can't wait for the sequel.  I'm reading The Hobbit with my boys, rather slowly, about a chapter every Saturday. The eagles have just rescued Bilbo and Company from the goblins and wargs....

My family attended an exhibit of artifacts from the Titanic in a city near us with a gift cert we received for Christmas.  It was pretty cool.  We were each given a "boarding pass" with the ID of an actual passenger, matched to our genders, and at the end of the tour, we got to see if our person had survived or not.  My dd and I were a mother and daughter who traveled first class, and survived, while Dh and the boys were a dad and two sons, third class passengers who perished.  There was a great discussion afterwards between the children of various ways the passengers could have been saved.  I am almost ready to dig up the James Cameron movie, which my children have never seen.  The gift shop was selling small fragments of the ship for $20 a pop.  I love that sort of thing usually - I have a stash of stones and dried flowers from various locations I've been to that I use in rituals and spells sometimes, but wouldn't want a bit of the TItanic in the house.  Too much pain and bad fortune associated with that bit of corroded metal, besides being a very expensive bit of corroded metal!

[redveg]

Originally Posted by FeralFox 

So, the baby is still there and healthy. 

Fantastic news! 

Originally Posted by FeralFox 

Redveg - That's my ex.  I'm 5'6", he's 5'5"ish and only a few pounds heavier.  And before him I was dating a boy who was an inch shorter and another 20 pounds lighter.  It's really nice to finally be with a man who doesn't make me feel like a big gangly monster.

My DH is on the slim side and me, not so much.  If he stands behind me you can't see him:)  I am trying to change that with diet and exercise though. When we first met I could fit in his pants, now I couldn't get them past my calves!
 

Originally Posted by Maiasaura 

Dang, that's not encouraging at all So wait, though-- Your one that can only see her side, or your DS who corrects everything; mine is a combo of those two. Yesterday I said "Is it more important to be kind, or to be right?"-- I think he is still too young to get that. But he's smart enough to consider it.

Sigh.

So-- what do you do? When he gets like that? I mostly scream my fool head off, because mostly ds will not shut up under pain of death, and after a point, his voice is like an icepick in my ear...and when we have nothing to do, I can go in my room and put in earplugs and try to calm down, but usually he pulls this shite when we have exactly one hour to get out the door for school, or when he has to get to bed on a weeknight. Heavy sigh.

 

I haven't always been calm.  I so know where you are coming from!  There are still times when I lose it.  Right now I am in the I refuse to engage stage.  I am always saying just because you are ready to talk does not mean I am ready to talk/listen.  My DD is a last word kid too, walking to her room still having a conversation just to get the last word and try to get the conversation tipping to the yelling stage.  It's amazing how quickly she can push buttons and get the entire house in a rumble.  I swear if I didn't laugh sometimes I would be crying and pulling my hair out.  When DD gets in her moods there is no talking to her, it's seems like no matter what I do, don't do, say. don't say it does not matter she is just looking for someone to engage, to get it out.  Sometimes I worry she doesn't like it here and when she goes to college she won't ever come back:(  I only know one thing for sure it is very frustrating!
 

Originally Posted by Maiasaura 

I don't know what his problem is. Surely you'd think it'd be easier to just get along. Today was another one! Half a freaking day of school, and he got written up in school because...get this, he didn't want to go outside for recess. Apparently he asked the asst.teacher if he could stay in the classroom and read his book. She said no, everyone has to stay together. Got outside, did a head count, DS was not there, he'd decided he had the right to stay in the classroom anyway.

And THEN, proceeded to make up a story, and believe it, that he'd asked and was given permission-by-omission (she didn't expressly say NO, she just said "everybody has to go out") and then gave major attitude about it. MAJOR. On his "infraction paper" you're supposed to finish questions/statements such as "What happened was..." and "My behavior affected others by..." and "Next time I will..." and his huge attitude shone right through on the paper So I made him write it over and when he did, it said "My mom throttled me against the wall", so I made him write a third one, and still he was crying and playing the victim. Amazing what he will go through, and put other people through...you'd really think behaving is easier.

M helped me through it in a major way. I'm much calmer, but why the eff does he have to do this???

Anything by omission is my DD!  This kid will stick to a story I know is not true because I didn't word the question, quote in the exact same way she did.  I feel like a cop when I am talking to her asking the same thing in every possible way I can think of in hopes I get it how she said it.  She also can play the Victim like a pro! Everything is because of someone else.  It's good that you have M to talk to about it and get a males perspective.

[redveg]

Morning all,

Right now I am reading nothing for fun:(  It's all nutrition stuff. 

Things have been wild here the last 2 weeks.  My pig YodaMae cannot use her back legs.  I had the vet come out the day after I noticed it and a week ago tomorrow, and she is coming out tomorrow again to have another look.  I have been so stressed about the decision I am going to have to make:(  She eats, drinks, uses the potty (on training pads) but can't stand. I have to change and check on her every 2 hours. I can tell she is not happy, wants to get out but is not able.  Last night she started screaming at 4a because she fell over too far on her side and could not get up, so to me this is a move in the wrong direction.  I just feel so guilty because in every way, except the back legs, she is fine. I feel like I am a murderer if I go with the putting her down decision and I feel selfish if I keep her the way she is for too long if there is not going to be any improvement. I just don't want her to suffer in any way.  I just wish I could fix her:(

[_ktg_]

Originally Posted by Aeress 

We make candles, candy, and do the pooka pages.

So, what is everyone reading?

Oooh right now:

2-hour Tarot Reading by Wilma Carroll as I'm playing with my new cards.  It's actually making more sense on how to read the cards vs. having to look up the meanings.

Urban Magick by Christopher Penczak

Pride & Prejudice

I just finished over the holidays Book of Shadows by Phyllis Curott - which was a very nice read. 

[_ktg_]

Originally Posted by redveg 

Morning all,

Right now I am reading nothing for fun:(  It's all nutrition stuff. 

Things have been wild here the last 2 weeks.  My pig YodaMae cannot use her back legs.  I had the vet come out the day after I noticed it and a week ago tomorrow, and she is coming out tomorrow again to have another look.  I have been so stressed about the decision I am going to have to make:(  She eats, drinks, uses the potty (on training pads) but can't stand. I have to change and check on her every 2 hours. I can tell she is not happy, wants to get out but is not able.  Last night she started screaming at 4a because she fell over too far on her side and could not get up, so to me this is a move in the wrong direction.  I just feel so guilty because in every way, except the back legs, she is fine. I feel like I am a murderer if I go with the putting her down decision and I feel selfish if I keep her the way she is for too long if there is not going to be any improvement. I just don't want her to suffer in any way.  I just wish I could fix her:(

  You will come to the right decision for YodaMae, I'm sending you hugs and strength right now. 

[3xMama]

Originally Posted by Maiasaura 

I don't know what his problem is. Surely you'd think it'd be easier to just get along. Today was another one! Half a freaking day of school, and he got written up in school because...get this, he didn't want to go outside for recess. Apparently he asked the asst.teacher if he could stay in the classroom and read his book. She said no, everyone has to stay together. Got outside, did a head count, DS was not there, he'd decided he had the right to stay in the classroom anyway.

And THEN, proceeded to make up a story, and believe it, that he'd asked and was given permission-by-omission (she didn't expressly say NO, she just said "everybody has to go out") and then gave major attitude about it. MAJOR. On his "infraction paper" you're supposed to finish questions/statements such as "What happened was..." and "My behavior affected others by..." and "Next time I will..." and his huge attitude shone right through on the paper So I made him write it over and when he did, it said "My mom throttled me against the wall", so I made him write a third one, and still he was crying and playing the victim. Amazing what he will go through, and put other people through...you'd really think behaving is easier.

M helped me through it in a major way. I'm much calmer, but why the eff does he have to do this???

Good lord, Maia. I'd be yelling my fool head off at that point, too. Wish I could do more for you, but all I can do is offer a virtual hug soo....

Originally Posted by Aubergine68 

I love Sharon Shinn and actually have Pathfinder out from the library for the second time.  Somehow, I thought it was a sequel.  May reread it - it has a really interesting premise! --  but my favorite Card novel is still Pastwatch.  I have a bunch of L. E. Modesitt novels out too, and have been rereading bits of the Tamora Pierce novels that my daughter has been signing out.

Just finished Lauren Oliver's Delirium, which is wonderful - can't wait for the sequel.  I'm reading The Hobbit with my boys, rather slowly, about a chapter every Saturday. The eagles have just rescued Bilbo and Company from the goblins and wargs....

My family attended an exhibit of artifacts from the Titanic in a city near us with a gift cert we received for Christmas.  It was pretty cool.  We were each given a "boarding pass" with the ID of an actual passenger, matched to our genders, and at the end of the tour, we got to see if our person had survived or not.  My dd and I were a mother and daughter who traveled first class, and survived, while Dh and the boys were a dad and two sons, third class passengers who perished.  There was a great discussion afterwards between the children of various ways the passengers could have been saved.  I am almost ready to dig up the James Cameron movie, which my children have never seen.  The gift shop was selling small fragments of the ship for $20 a pop.  I love that sort of thing usually - I have a stash of stones and dried flowers from various locations I've been to that I use in rituals and spells sometimes, but wouldn't want a bit of the TItanic in the house.  Too much pain and bad fortune associated with that bit of corroded metal, besides being a very expensive bit of corroded metal!

I thought Pathfinder was the start of a series but I'm not sure now? I did just find out they are making it into a movie, though. I'm hoping its a good one! I heard OSC finally got a screenplay for Ender's Game that he likes so that will be made into a movie soon, too. Here's hoping, I'd love love love to see that as a film!

Originally Posted by redveg 

Morning all,

Right now I am reading nothing for fun:(  It's all nutrition stuff. 

Things have been wild here the last 2 weeks.  My pig YodaMae cannot use her back legs.  I had the vet come out the day after I noticed it and a week ago tomorrow, and she is coming out tomorrow again to have another look.  I have been so stressed about the decision I am going to have to make:(  She eats, drinks, uses the potty (on training pads) but can't stand. I have to change and check on her every 2 hours. I can tell she is not happy, wants to get out but is not able.  Last night she started screaming at 4a because she fell over too far on her side and could not get up, so to me this is a move in the wrong direction.  I just feel so guilty because in every way, except the back legs, she is fine. I feel like I am a murderer if I go with the putting her down decision and I feel selfish if I keep her the way she is for too long if there is not going to be any improvement. I just don't want her to suffer in any way.  I just wish I could fix her:(

I must've missed or forgotten about YodaMae, I'm sorry! I'm so sorry to hear that she's not doing well. You are in a tough situation, I feel for you. I hope you are able to come to a good, peaceful decision!

Holy cranky teething babies...its going to be a long long day at this rate...

[revolting]

Originally Posted by 3xMama 

This morning was DD's first day at her new school. We switched her because her first school did not seem to have a clue. It was a Montessori charter and lets just say its was more Lord of the Flies than Montessori. So we go outside so I can take DD to school and what is there but this beautiful, round, white, huge moon setting in the west. We were lucky enough to have it in sight the whole way to school and it really comforted DD, who was of course pretty nervous. She was glad to think that the Goddess was blessing her on the first day of school.  It was sweet. In the fifteen minutes between pulling into the parking lot, taking DD inside and coming back out, the sun had risen into a beautiful, crisp day. I'm taking that as a good omen for this school and the rest of the year. 

How'd her first day of school go?

Originally Posted by Aeress 

We make candles, candy, and do the pooka pages.

So, what is everyone reading?

I just finished The Room by Emma Donoghue, which I really liked. Currently I'm reading Seduced by Moonlight in the Meredith Gentry series. It definitely is Pagan fiction, but like most of Hamilton's work, there's a lot, lot, lot of sex...and I think her books would be more interesting with a whole lot less sex.
 

Originally Posted by 3xMama 

 I heard OSC finally got a screenplay for Ender's Game that he likes so that will be made into a movie soon, too. Here's hoping, I'd love love love to see that as a film!

I hope so. I loved that book as a child, but it's been years since I read it.

We've had a rough morning. Because of our trip, I haven't done the grocery shopping for the week yet, so we have no food. I try to get us all to the store, but my eldest keeps screaming, hitting me, telling me she wants to kill me over wanting one of her younger sibling's toys that he doesn't want to share. We didn't make it to the store. Now, she won't stop whining about how she's hungry, and nothing we have she wants to eat.

[Maiasaura]

Originally Posted by redveg I haven't always been calm.  I so know where you are coming from!  There are still times when I lose it.  Right now I am in the I refuse to engage stage.  I am always saying just because you are ready to talk does not mean I am ready to talk/listen.  My DD is a last word kid too, walking to her room still having a conversation just to get the last word and try to get the conversation tipping to the yelling stage.  It's amazing how quickly she can push buttons and get the entire house in a rumble.  I swear if I didn't laugh sometimes I would be crying and pulling my hair out.  When DD gets in her moods there is no talking to her, it's seems like no matter what I do, don't do, say. don't say it does not matter she is just looking for someone to engage, to get it out.  Sometimes I worry she doesn't like it here and when she goes to college she won't ever come back:(  I only know one thing for sure it is very frustrating!

Anything by omission is my DD!  This kid will stick to a story I know is not true because I didn't word the question, quote in the exact same way she did.  I feel like a cop when I am talking to her asking the same thing in every possible way I can think of in hopes I get it how she said it.  She also can play the Victim like a pro! Everything is because of someone else.  It's good that you have M to talk to about it and get a males perspective.

Ye Gods. I keep hoping this will freaking end by the time he's your kids' ages, but I am feeling less and less confident about that. All I can really hope for is that his good side shines out and he does not end up in an orange jumpsuit. Or dead.

Originally Posted by redveg Things have been wild here the last 2 weeks.  My pig YodaMae cannot use her back legs.  I had the vet come out the day after I noticed it and a week ago tomorrow, and she is coming out tomorrow again to have another look.  I have been so stressed about the decision I am going to have to make:(  She eats, drinks, uses the potty (on training pads) but can't stand. I have to change and check on her every 2 hours. I can tell she is not happy, wants to get out but is not able.  Last night she started screaming at 4a because she fell over too far on her side and could not get up, so to me this is a move in the wrong direction.  I just feel so guilty because in every way, except the back legs, she is fine. I feel like I am a murderer if I go with the putting her down decision and I feel selfish if I keep her the way she is for too long if there is not going to be any improvement. I just don't want her to suffer in any way.  I just wish I could fix her:(

Aww! Poor YodaMae You aren't a murderer, redveg; sometimes euthanasia is the kindest thing.

Nutrition: Have you read Gary Taubes? I am getting ready to maybe OWN "Why We Get Fat..."

Originally Posted by revolting Now, she won't stop whining about how she's hungry, and nothing we have she wants to eat.

Don't you hate that? I'm very much anymore "Oh well, they'll eat whatever I serve them when they're hungry enough". If ds says he doesn't want <insert food here> then I say he must not be truly hungry.

This morning started off very much angsty again I got right down in ds's face and I said "You have 30 minutes till we leave for school. You better change your attitude around right now , or when you get home, you will be grounded from all toys, electronics, and books. You will lay on your bed till bedtime with nothing to do. And if you get another infraction paper at school, you will be grounded from all toys, electronics, and books. You will lay on your bed till bedtime with nothing to do. Are you understanding me?"

GRRR. To his credit, he stopped. AND he shut up.

To my discredit-- mamas, I am ashamed of myself and scared of my own anger, sometimes. I didn't throttle my boy, but I did have my hand over his shoulder, very near his neck, and I pushed him down on the bed that way. I was VERY pushed to my limit. But I need to be honest and put it down in writing so that it doesn't happen again. I will never admit it to ds, but my own behavior that day really scared me.

DOK: mind PMing me your address? My ds has something he wants to send to yours (hint: Ben10 stuff).

[LionessMom]

Originally Posted by 3xMama 

Hoping your DH's eye appointment goes well! How awesome to be able to see out of that eye! If you don't mind my asking, what happened when he was 15?

Hooray for baby kicks! That's one of the most awesome feelings!! And sleep...ahhh sleep is so wonderful. Glad you're getting some. Good sleep will go miles in helping you feel better!

Crossing your fingers that you find a good van ASAP!

we arent sure what happened. it could have been trauma related (he had an abusive step father) or it could have been genetic. but he developed a cataract in that eye. his mom could have had it taken care of then but didnt for some unknown reason. so as soon as we had available insurance for him we took care of it. they said he still has some blood floating around in there that interferes with sight but that it looks like it is clearing up on it s own. he might not need a second surgery to remove the blood. they also said his retina is perfect with no detachments so it is useable. they think it looks good for him to recover sight. he might need glasses but he will see stuff out of it. 

kicks are still sporadic but i am only 16 weeks. but sleeping through the night is awesome. 

the only van i can find is awesome except for the head gasket leak. they keep calling me and saying how they fixed this and that but they never admit they had a head gasket leak. they keep saying it is an intake leak even though my mechanic said it was the head gasket. if they call back again and say the fixed the supposed intake leak, i have a friend mechanic willing to look at it too. i will get a second opinion on it. my options are limited. but i am going to get on yellow book online and start calling every car lot i can find to ask what they got. i didnt realize it would be this hard to find an 8 seat van :/