- 2,164 Posts. Joined 11/2001
- Location: Texas
- Select All Posts By This User
Related Forum Threads
- My adopted son went back to his bio family. Last post on Yesterday at 8:09 am in Adoptive and Foster Parenting
- Looking for book ideas for children, what are your kids favorites? Last post on 4/7/13 at 6:43pm in Adoptive and Foster Parenting
- not related to us so much, but adoption and where adopted babies come from Last post on 2/22/13 at 4:15pm in March 2013 Due Date Club
- Nursing an adopted infant Last post on 3/15/13 at 10:55pm in Adoptive and Foster Parenting
- Trying to Adopt/Foster 2013 Chat Thread. Last post on 5/18/13 at 2:00pm in Adoptive and Foster Parenting
Talking About Adoption...Honestly
Edited on 11/7/12
- Transracial adoptionEdited on 4/4/13
- Adoption And Foster Parenting ResourcesEdited on 1/29/12
ADHD, attachment, adoption s/o of honeymoon over - Page 2post #21 of 262/14/12 at 5:36pmThread StarterKatherine, I think you're question getsto the core of where could our kids be headed, how to help them now kind of stuff. Mom31, I would love to hear your insight and perspective.post #22 of 262/14/12 at 5:57pm
. Sadly yes- my attatchment disorder very much affects my parenting.... but i do parent my two kids and I do love my kids to death. I do go to therapy sometimes tho not currently working with a therapist.
I find myself zoning out alot- and things like glitter being spilled all over the house simply because I was not paying attention.
I find it hard to be close to my kids- like truly feel anything- so I numb out- that s not to say I don't express love to them cause I do- I sleep with them I breastfed them for years we cuddle and snuggle and hug.... but there is a huge disconnect that is hard to describe.
I will try to think this out more clearly- but thats my initial thoughts.
Oh the ADHD- well that tends to mean my house is very messy and my amom comes once a month to help me stay on top of it. :) bmom comes but does not help to much as she is disabled and just comes one time a year :)
I have a hard time keeping up with appointments- remembering them, scheduling them... etc. I miss things. I forget to check backpacks. Sometimes I forget to fix lunch on the weekends till they ask.
I just find I have to work around it all and do the best I can. I am also a single mom on top of it- so that is hard since I have no one to lean on- all family is at the minimum 6 hours away.
I talked to another adoptee by phone recently and she talked about the same thing- the feelings are too overwhelming.
I also found that once I had my second child- a girl- my adoption issues became more important to me- getting to the root and searching etc. Which has been good for me in long run.
But alas- am I answering your question??? lol. My mind is generally all over the place.
HOWEVER- I did not find out about any of this till I was an adult- so your dd's may be able to learn skills now to help them- I am learning skills now to cope and it is hard to teach an old dog new tricks so to speak- I know what works- picking up a book and zoning out....
Ask away- I really like the dialogue and think its great you ask. I am by no means an expert on anything- I just know what I know from what I lived.post #23 of 262/14/12 at 6:08pm
Just in the past few years have I been able to have close friends and close adult relationships. Usually if I have a friend I think they are mad at me all the time and going to leave me.... now I tell my friends- It is VERY important to me that if I have upset you you tell me right away- you have to agree to this- or I will ask you all the time if you are mad at me. I ask quite a bit less once this "pact" is made. I found something that worked- I also find the older I get people are a little more understanding of issues.
I tend to push people away- I do the testing out stuff- I am sure you have read about.... I am always waiting for people to leave me= so I generally pick people less likely to leave me- I shoot for the dirt so to speak.... not the moon...., am way to giving to the people in my life,
It's like I am so so so so so so so raw that I can't handle being around people sometimes- it's like sandpaper on a sunburn.
This does carry over to my kids- I am way to easy on them cause I don't want them to be mad at me.... always worried people will be mad at me- change their minds etc.
BTW- I was adopted at less then 2 weeks old.post #24 of 262/15/12 at 7:18am
I hope I was not too honest with what I said- and it was easy enough to comprehend. I think getting help for your kids now to develop skills with these types of issues which is what you are doing will help them immensely!!!
Hugs mamas.post #25 of 262/15/12 at 5:23pmpost #26 of 262/20/12 at 8:25pm
- ADHD, attachment, adoption s/o of honeymoon over
- Transracial adoption
- › A Saner TTC-The Pink Moon 2 minutes ago
- › The Walking Dead 3 minutes ago
- › Breastfeeding after Reduction 4 minutes ago
- › MSM Fox News Tells of Vaccine's Failure 8 minutes ago
- › Queer, Pregnant, & Parenting - April & May 2013! 9 minutes ago
- › Post-partum hemorrage experiences? 9 minutes ago
- › Help with discipline? 9 minutes ago
- › Signs of Impending Labor - chat thread 11 minutes ago
- › Baby Names Thread 11 minutes ago
- › Taking The Scenic Route to a BFP - Winter/Spring 2013 Edition 12 minutes ago
- › Udder Covers for Nursing Mothers - CARSON by kelseywhitney
- › Trillium Organics OGmama Belly Butter by trilliumama
- › Gaiam Wrap Waist Yoga Pants by Melanie Mayo
- › Ina May's Guide to Childbirth by dayiscoming2006
- › Charlie Banana Reusable Feminine Pads Liner Butterfly, Butterfly by Chapsie
- › Earth Mama-Angel Baby Earth Mama Bottom Balm, 2 fl oz (60 ml) by Chapsie
- › Econobum Individual by Chapsie
- › EnJoye LBI Deluxe Tote Set - Brown by JennaRose
- › Lusa Organics Booty Balm by emkassu
- › I Took the Moon for a Walk by Melanie Mayo
- › Happy Simple Baby Love by Melanie Mayo
- › Buying Pot for my 11-Year-Old by momofnatasha
- › Making the Grade by Melanie Mayo
- › Homeopathy -- A Lifesaver For Your Summer... by Melanie Mayo
- › Relax. Parenting Is Supposed to Be Messy,... by Brian Leaf
- › Managing Mom Stress: Sharing Tips and Trying... by Melanie Mayo
- › Who Wants to Sleep Alone? by Cynthia Mosher
- › Should I Train My Child....Like a Dog?! by Sarah Clark
- › Mothering Articles by Melanie Mayo
- › Terms and Conditions - Sustainability Oak... by JenniO11