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Queer Conceptions January 2012 - Page 8

post #141 of 325

Cananny: That does suck. My RE has a nurse on-call to do IUIs on the weekend if need be. They only do it if absolutely necessary, but they don't want someone to miss a cycle because "O" day falls on the weekend!


Dandy: The risks for multiples doesn't bother us. We want more than one LO as well, and we're willing to take the risk. DW has a set of "Clomid triplets" in her family, so we know exactly what we would be getting into!


AFM: No smiley on the OPK this morning. Unless I get one tonight, I will probably be getting the trigger shot tomorrow and then doing the IUI on Tuesday. I go back in for another follicle scan first thing in the morning. As for the bill thing, I am SO glad my insurance is covering my u/s and bloodwork. The bill for that this month alone has already surpassed the cost of the sperm -and we're in for another round tomorrow morning. All I've had to pay for so far is my copay to see to the doctor on the 3rd.


FX for everyone on the TWW!

post #142 of 325
Seems my follies behaved!!! No positive on opk so we will get to do iui!!!!! Yay

Yeah sucks for closing but it cost me 20.00 to use them (kaiser insurance) sooo I can't complain and lucky we have a back up plan with a Kd !!!
post #143 of 325

first of all (and belatedly):


Carmen!!!!!!!! carrot.gifbroc1.gifbanana.gifcarrot.gifbroc1.gifbanana.gif carrot.gifbroc1.gifbanana.gif carrot.gifbroc1.gifbanana.gif carrot.gifbroc1.gifbanana.gif carrot.gifbroc1.gifbanana.gif carrot.gifbroc1.gifbanana.gif carrot.gifbroc1.gifbanana.gif carrot.gifbroc1.gifbanana.gif carrot.gifbroc1.gifbanana.gif carrot.gifbroc1.gifbanana.gif carrot.gifbroc1.gifbanana.gif carrot.gifbroc1.gifbanana.gif carrot.gifbroc1.gifbanana.gif carrot.gifbroc1.gifbanana.gif carrot.gifbroc1.gifbanana.gif carrot.gifbroc1.gifbanana.gif carrot.gifbroc1.gifbanana.gif carrot.gifbroc1.gifbanana.gif carrot.gifbroc1.gifbanana.gif carrot.gifbroc1.gifbanana.gif carrot.gifbroc1.gifbanana.gif carrot.gifbroc1.gifbanana.gif


yay for the BFP and the great betas!  I have a good feeling that this little bean will be a sticky one.  I've got all my digits tightly crossed for you!



Krista --  DP and i watched you on 20/20 yesterday!  It was so cool to see you "live" and hear your voice.  You sounded just as knowledgeable as you do here.  I have to tell you, though, that DP was absolutely appalled at the obviously negative/judgemental slant of the piece.  I'd forgotten how sensational American news programs can be.  The interviewer's facial expression seemed to alternate between shock and disgust when she was talking to the people who were doing the inseminations, yet she seemed much more neutral towards (or even supportive of) the straight woman who was sleeping with her donors.  We also think it's absolutely insane that the govt is trying to intervene and prevent your donor from continuing to donate.  Seriously, wtf?   What I found most disappointing, though, was the absence of your dog in the scene in your car. :D  Anyway, it was a treat to watch, and I hope you'll continue speaking out!


invitn -- first of all, i'm so sorry about the RE.  if the negativity continues, i really think you should change docs.  i think as long as you have a healthy, functioning uterus, pregnancy should be possible.  hell, i have a friend who lost her ovaries at 16 and she was able to get pregnant with one of her wife's embryos (now a 2 year old child).   i know it's not the same thing as your situation, but my friend spent most her adult life thinking that she'd never carry a child.  please don't let this woman destroy your hope!  also, thanks for the good wishes for the u/s...i'll tell more about that below.  as for the lap, they said they want to do it to rule out pathologies like endo.  


cananny -- what's going on with the opks?  have you made it this far without a positive?  i hope so! it's weird that the clinic closes down like that...  


rs -- still no smilies for you, either?  i think the trigger shots are brilliant in terms of timing, and i've heard it can give you a better ovulation (whatever that means) and give support to the lining.  my docs in belgium want me to do a trigger for ovulation and then another shot a week later for luteal support.  and i totally know what you mean about the clomid!  i spent one day wandering around amsterdam (one of my favorite cities on earth) in a tearful, near-suicidal funk because of that drug.  i never experienced the rage, though, until i was taking estrace. let us know what happens with the trigger and insemination!


anna -- thankya muchly for the tunnelbear link!  i'd tried other similar programs but none of them worked as well as tb does.  i'm stoked to be able to watch my bbc and channel 4 docs again!  how's the tww going?  are ya'll going to test or wait it out?


dandy -- my, what big balls you have there.  if those don't work, i don't know what will!  low level cramping around 7dpo sounds promising!  fingers crossed that it's from implantation.


sorry if i missed anyone else...it's after 3am here, and my brain is a bit blurry.


afm....  well, my u/s was both exciting and disappointing.  the estrace apparently worked, because my lining was 10mm at cd12 (the thickest it's ever been in all my monitoring).  however, i had no follicles above 7,5mm and that one was on the side that's supposedly blocked.  i stopped the estrace and started doing opks a few days just in case my follies decided to magically start growing, but so far nothing.  this month is a bust for me, i guess.  i'm happy to see that my lining can get thick, though, and i think it will do very well on injectibles.    DP went ahead an insemmed twice this week, but like me, she's not sure about ovulation.  I can't help but wonder if the hsg has something to do with it.  In any case, she'll be starting her IUIs in about a month!


i did a lot of thinking and reading about the laparoscopy, and after finding out that i would have to miss as much as 4 weeks of work (!!!) and seeing that the surgery can actually create adhesions and other problems, i decided to write the belgian docs and ask if they'd be willing to attempt a few iuis first.  i realllly don't want to have the lap, but if it's absolutely necessary, i'd like to wait until the summer when i have four months off and don't have to worry about lost pay.  i have no idea what i'm going to do if they say no....  if they do say yes, i'll be starting 75 ui of puregon (follistim, i think) as soon as AF arrives.


it's bedtime in froggyland!  here's wishing you all a great week full of BFPs and perfectly timed insems!




post #144 of 325

cananny -- just saw your post.  YAY!!!!! when are you doing the insem?  fx big time!  goodvibes.gif

post #145 of 325
Thread Starter 

First of all, thank you thank you to everyone's kind encouraging and wise words about my last post re: being told by doctor that my ovarian reserves need to be checked. I felt very sad and somewhat deflated as I sat in my car after that appt last Wednesday and it has meant so much to read your guys ideas/support. This is exactly why I love this site. I don't know how I walked through the ups and downs of this process before I found a community of such intelligent and kind other lezzies. thanks.gif


Krista: Lady you were brilliant on 20/20..so calm, collected and articulate. You came across so flawless in your responses. You definitely sounded a lot more savvy and professional than the narrator/interviewer who was particularly obnoxious and overly judgmental (like a FOX news anchor) with the first woman's segment (woman married who met donor in hotel room for AI). It is completely ridiculous that the govt has anything to do with what your donor chooses to do with his own bodily functions. I thought it was particularly cute (and awesome) that your donor takes such a vested interest in his viability of his swimmers..with those fertility shakes.

As far as you questioning issues with your own egg quality, my friend (going to be 38) who tried to conceive for 2 1/2 years checked out a fertility clinic in Chicago online who was doing research and treatment with women who have had repeated marriages. I will get the name of the clinic just so you have it. Anyway,from what I remembering her saying, the clinic particularly explore autoimmune issues related to the miscarriages. My friend started taking a supplement called Wobezyme which I think is supposed to help with possibly autoimmune issues and within 2 months of taking it she got pregnant and she is currently 16 weeks or so along. My friend really thought that Wobezyme had a lot to do with her getting pregnant, (thinking she had been having multiple chemical pregnancies). I asked my RE about this supplement and she said that she doesn't think it going to help the uterus/or anything with fertility at all. I really need to see a naturapath. I realize that getting pregnant is not your particular issue but if you haven't heard of this supplement you might want to check it/talk to naturapath about it so at the very least you can add it to your arsenal of fertility knowledge. smile.gif


And thank you thank you to your feedback: My doctor didn't bring up me getting a LH tested, just FSH and AMH. Do u think that will matter? Should I ask my doc about it? Also it was very interesting to hear you say that eggs shells can harden as women age.


Carmen: I'm so happy that your beta numbers are doing what they are supposed to do. Good luck at your appt on Feb 2. I would love to know more about what you know about CoQ10. I have heard of this but I don't know much.


RS11: It seems like all the pieces are being put in place for your next insem, yeah! The issue of possible multiples is very real, but it's part of the gamble but what a worthwhile gamble.


Amt1015: So sorry to hear about the medical bills is causing you guys to push back ttc for a month. That is really hard to deal with especially if you were planning to try. What a pain! This has happened to DW and I a couple different times and it's always particularly agonizing for me. DW is typically the more rational money manager of the two of us. I applaud you for being so responsible with your fiances and this process and doing what makes sense.


Cananny: Yeah good luck on your insem!!!!!


Planet: oh the waiting waiting waiting of the tww....it definitely sucks. I recommend focusing externally or when you notice a sensation just try to refocus on your breath, or another sensation that you will naturally be less judgmental about. Hugs.


Dandy: Too bad you have to be on progesterone right now but I hope that your cramping a couple of days ago was that little bean trying to implant.


Nosreves: I hope you get a favorable reply from your docs in Belgium.


AFM: I have had a whirlwind of a weekend. I worked all day yesterday, hosting an educational workshop. I'm always so pooped after these gigs and today I had my 3 yr old niece's birthday party. There was about 15 kids under 5 running around with musical instruments at one point- yep it was cute but boy was I overly stimulated.


Tomorrow I should hear from my RE about my ovarian reserve testing. I will check back in then.


Have a wonderful start to the week everybody.




post #146 of 325
Originally Posted by nosreves View Post

cananny -- just saw your post.  YAY!!!!! when are you doing the insem?  fx big time!  goodvibes.gif

Still no pos on opk!!!! So doing iui on Tuesday ..will trigger tomorrow ...I luckily have a friend who's a nurse in l/d so she will mix and do the shot for me !!!! cold.gif
post #147 of 325

OMG, so it turns out that the OPKs aren't as accurate as they would like you to believe. Apparently, my line yesterday was a faint positive that didn't trigger the test. I suspected as much when I woke up this morning to find sharp pains in my right side. The u/s at the doctors confirmed that I am ovulating; we're waiting on bloodwork to see where I am in the process and if we need to do the IUI today. She said she would call me in a couple of hours to let me know. I expect we're either going back in for the IUI or we're going to have missed this cycle, but I am definitely cramping bad right now.


I'm also cramping some on my left side; not surprising, since I have a 15 mm follicle there as well that will probably be really in the next day or two!


Fx crossed that I haven't missed this cycle. This is going to be a long two hours.

post #148 of 325

Morning everyone. Still zero symptoms for me at 8-9 DPO. In past cycles I've had symptoms I've thought might be pregnancy but were really my body getting ready for AF, so the absence of symptoms I find sort of comforting.


Dandylez, Planet, Anna -- fingers crossed for the 2WW crew and anyone else I may have forgotten!fingersx.gif


And to everyone who is taking the stems toward a future insem.... here's hoping for a good week ahead.

post #149 of 325

Thanks to everyone who tuned in and watched the 20/20 piece. Overall, I was pleased with it. DP was not. She ended up freaking out because her photo was on there and didn't want to go to work today for fear someone saw her. Needless to say, it was a little rough on Saturday as I got the silent treatment during our 9 mile run... But she's better now. She's just such a private person and I'm not.


Yes, Elizabeth Vargas did seem to have some bias and you could tell during her interviews. Interestingly, I believe her children are the result of IVF as she had them in her early 40s, almost mid-40s. She should understand the difficulties of getting pregnant and the lengths we'll go to in order to have a child. You probably didn't notice, but she actually never interviewed me so luckily, she couldn't show her biased facial expressions in relation to me! I had flown to LA to interview with her but she ended up being quite sick and couldn't. And now, looking at the piece, I'm glad she didn't.


I've gotten to know the other two women in the piece so it's been quite a journey. One has had four miscarriages and the other three (one at four months along) so we're a unique little group. But my media days (related to infertility!) are over. I've said my piece and I'm glad to have gotten the info out there. Now, I will just continue to spout my beliefs here. ROTFLMAO.gif


Invited: thanks for the info on the enzyme. I am debating whether I try to find a clinic that specializes in or looks at repeat miscarriages. I have to talk with my IVF doctor first and then decide. I need to know how much she knows first. My plan is to get a full workup of hormonal and autoimmune issues. I'm going to have to use three sources to get it done though -- Kaiser (my insurance), IVF clinic and the Alan Biers Center which is a speciality clinic that only does testing and will basically fill in the blanks where your clinic or insurance doesn't. Amazing that I have to work three places to really get the answers I need, but so be it. I'm getting used to it.


Cannany: crossing my fingers everything works with the insem and timing.


RS11: WTF? I know you can't just depend on OPKs but I know you weren't as you're monitoring other signs. I can't remember the statistic but it's quite high, for those that OPKs are not accurate (meaning they might read one thing but an ultrasound reads another). I guess that's why Stephanie Brill's Guide to Lesbian Conception recommends when 3 signs line up, go with your gut. It's hard though, I know. You constantly question yourself and modern medicine makes you question as well! Best of luck. I'm hoping it works for you despite everything.



post #150 of 325

Okay, so now I don't know what to think and I'm getting a bit emotional. I just talked to the nurse and she said the bloodwork shows I haven't ovulated yet, but that's not what it looked like on the u/s, especially on the right side (that follicle was collapsing). The one on the left is still growing. The bottom line is, they want me to come back in on Wednesday for more bloodwork and another u/s and they may consider putting me on another medication.


The thing is...I feel like I've ovulated. I've been cramping like I have and I've had lots of the white CM today. So I don't know if maybe they're just trying to stretch it out a little longer before telling me this cycle is a bust (and collect another $350 from the insurance company while they're at it) or what.

post #151 of 325

I am jumping back in here...and looking forward to getting to know the "new" TTC crowd--I was active in this group in 2008/2009 prior to conceiving our DS who is now 21 months (!).  A little about us, we started trying with DW, things didn't go well for her...compounded by horrific panic attacks every time we went to the fertility clinic.  We switched to me (and switched donors) and eventually got pregnant with DS.  Now we are looking to start trying again in March and we have our new fertility clinic intake on Thursday.  The plan is for DW to carry our next child.  


I am incredibly anxious about DW carrying due to our prior experience with panic attacks.  But, she says that she is going into this round in a much better place and feeling way more in control of everything in general (which I agree is true).  So, fingers crossed that the PTSD of prior trying is kept at bay!  She doesn't hang out here, nor is she much of a computer person...so hopefully folks don't mind a non-gestational mom jumping in!


Thanks, and fx for everyone in the thick of things!

post #152 of 325

hi everyone.  so glad i found this forum - what a wealth of queer fertility knowledge!  


my partner and i tried our first diy insem today, (frozen sperm).  her brother is the donor but he lives out of state, so we have his boys banked down the road.  we picked up a vial this morning; after all the expensive medical tests, clueless clinic managers, legal document drafting, and logistical challenges, we finally walked through those doors with a plastic tube of thawing jizz in a paper lunch bag.   then we came home and got busy under the electric blanket.  what a trip.


wish us luck, and good luck to all of you!

post #153 of 325

Wanted to jump in here quickly to write a note about egg quality.


Our DD (now 1.5) was conceived via IVF after we had four early losses. DW was 35 at the time, so we didn't even think about egg quality. We thought it was just a matter of staying pregnant. However, when we went to an RE, he was pretty certain it was an egg quality issue and was able to get us to IVF because of the need to do genetic testing of the eggs (PGD). Of the 7 retrieved eggs that fertilized, 4 had genetic defects that showed up in the testing (which was a test of the 8 chromosomes most likely to have defects that would affect viability/life). So, that meant that there was a greater than 50% chance of a non-viable egg from that round. When we thought about it, though the math is not perfect, it made it seem that this likelihood would probably stand for any pregnancy achieved through non-IVF. It made me SO thankful for our RE and for this process. Particularly since we hadn't really considered the egg quality side of things before.


Not saying that anyone here definitely has egg quality issues, but I do think that it can be an oft-overlooked issue.


Hope this helps!

post #154 of 325

Hi Everybody!  DP and I have been reading through everyone's posts, and keeping up with the ups and downs of TTC.  We are so inspired by you ladies and appreciate your knowledge and willingness to share your stories. 


rs11 I'm so sorry about your frustration.  It's so hard to know if doctor's are just pulling your leg or not- especially when you don't 100% trust your doc/nursing staff.  Hopefully everything is on the up and up and they will figure out what's going on. 


Krista DP and I watched your 20/20 episode!  You were so fantastic!  We both echo the sentiments of the other women that have commented.  It's frustrating that the slant was negative, but you did an excellent job and it was so exciting to see you in our living room!  thumb.gif


Cananny good luck with your IUI- it looks like we will be TWW buddies!!


Invitn I hope your doc has good news tomorrow!  Let us know when they call. 


To everyone in the TWW- good luck and here's to hoping for LOTS of BFPs!!  dust.gif


AFM  Today DP had her follicle scan and had one nice mature one on her right side (2.2 cm).  The nurse said the one on the left probably wasn't big enough to rupture.  She got her Hcg shot and the IUI is scheduled for Wednesday.  Last month she didn't O until the day after the insem, so we figured there wasn't enough time between the shot and insem.  This time we are spacing the insem about 44 hours from the trigger shot.  Hopefully we'll have better luck!

post #155 of 325

So, I need some help, please. 


Could you look at my wife's chart and voice an opinion on what day you think she ovulated?





FF says Jan 4th (CD13) but I'm thinking it happened a couple of days later.

Her other signs were all over the place this month, so not much help.


I'm trying to decide if there's any point in POAS yet.

She wants to test before her period starts (which should be in 3 days or so) but if my guess of ovulation on Jan 7th (CD 16) is right, she's only 9 days along...  dizzy.gif


So, Vote Now!  smile.gif

Edited by AnnaNotherThing - 1/18/12 at 2:15pm
post #156 of 325

rs11 - I'm so sorry.  hug2.gif  Is there any way to get them to insem twice?  I hope you can find some peace after this is all over with. 


wishin'&hopin - Welcome back!  I'm a NGP too, I'm glad you're here.  I'm sorry your wife had such a struggle last time around, I'm hoping this time she has an easier time of it.  When is your first official month?  Is it right now?


CarpenterAnt - Welcome to Queer Parenting!  We're glad you found us, too!  Hoping the TWW brings you a first-timer's BFP!  Would you tell us a little bit more about yourself and your partner? 


TineyDreams - GOOD LUCK!  Hoping this time is the charm for you guys! 


As for us: back a couple weeks ago, just after we got our BFP, we told my parents right before Christmas and I mentioned that we did get it on video.  Well, the video is finally ready!  For anybody wanting to see us and my family, you can check out the video here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pwdCaUNl22k  (DW has a ponytail, I'm wearing glasses and a newsboy cap.  My mom, dad, and brother should be pretty apparent.)  

post #157 of 325

Desert: Your video made me teary!! I love your dad! "Merry fking Chrismas!" That was the best line ever.  What a wonderful moment you guys captured, and what a great way to tell them.  So great! 


Welcome.gifWELCOME Carpenter Ant!!!! and WELCOME BACK!!! Wishin'&Hopin'!!!!  Here's hoping that your stays here are short!


rs11 That's confusing, but it sure sounds like you O'd on the one side, but that the left could also go. I don't know enough about multiple follicles and how that affects your LH surge.  Desert's suggestion about insemming twice is a great one if it's possible??  But if you can't, then count on that left side to grow so that you can time your insem best. Good luck!! FX!


Anna - I wish I could help with your chart, but I don't chart so I'm useless in that area.  I hope you're able to figure it out!


Nothing to report from here.  Just checking in with you all! :)

post #158 of 325
Thread Starter 
Sorry no time for personals...on my phone and getting real sleepy. I will be back tomorrow.

I got the call today from my RE's nurse who told me my test results were w/in normal range: FSH: 5.6 and AMH: 2.9 (which I think might be on the high end of normal).Nurse didnt mention any concerns...so I will go w it for now.
post #159 of 325

placenta.gif - Sorry, we must have posted at the same time earlier!  My vote for ovulation day is Friday the 6th, CD 15.  When did you insem?  


Dandy - thanks!  You're so sweet.  It makes my heart swell with joy to know such lovely people as you all.  luxlove.gif


invitn - WHEW!  Thank goodness those results were within normal ranges!  stillheart.gif

post #160 of 325

Invitin -Yay! I'm glad the results were within normal range! That means you can look at other issues. BTW, I know it's not really my place to say, but I don't think much of your RE's protocol. When I went in to see my OB/GYN with irregular periods, the first thing she did was complete hormone panel that checked all those hormones on the proper days, and more. My RE then repeated it after my intake. I hope they can get you straightened out! 


Cananny -Good luck with the insem!


Krista -I hope your able to get some answers.


Nosreves; Here's hoping you get the go-ahead.


AFM: Yesterday was an incredibly frustrating and emotionally raw day. Generally speaking, my RE is definitely on the up-and-up. They've got really good practices there. The RE himself is pretty straightforward and blunt, which I appreciate in a doctor when it comes to a process like this. That doesn't mean I don't think they might not try to get a bit of extra money from the insurer. Sure, I could insem twice -if I could afford two samples and two insems.


Here's what I think happened: either I did O on the right, or it tried to O and failed. The follicle was collapsing like it O'ed -could that be a sign of a bad egg or absence of an egg in that follicle? I still have a growing follicle on my left. It was at 15 mm yesterday. I think it's still growing, because I'm starting to feel it. The nurse said my estrogen was still rising, but my LH had actually gone down. I've NO idea what that could mean. I go back in tomorrow morning.


And the bad thing is, based on what the nurse told us yesterday morning, we thought I was ovulating and that we'd be going back for the IUI. Well, DW *really* wanted to be there and she had to work yesterday. She was the only manager on-duty, so she called someone to be on standby and come in for a couple of hours if we did the procedure. Naturally, she had to explain what was going on. This woman isn't a gossip, but she will tell her sister -who also works there and is the biggest gossip in the office. So, now everyone at DW's office is going to find out what's going on.

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