Pregnant with Uncertain future plans - how to handle the stress? « Back to Group Discussions

[MsZelda]

hello all - I thought I'd just jump in here - I am not sure where to post this but I'd love to share some feelings about this pregnancy. My DD and I have a 3 1/2 year old, he works full-time plus and I work 30 hours / week outside of the home as well as at home. My hope is to be a SAHM for a couple of years after the next baby comes, if we can swing it. Just before I got my BFP, we found out that we may very well be moved for my DH's work in the spring / early summer to another province (Ottawa, actually). He will also be away 5 weeks in the next couple of months with work commitments. I have been going crazy thinking about what this means. Maybe it's just early pregnancy insomnia, but lately, my nights are spent with my head in a spiral of "where will we live? how will i pack the house? when will I quit my job? what if I lose this pregnancy? we have so much to do to fix the house to sell? how will i work if this morning sickness keeps getting worse? how will we afford to live in the new city? will DD be freaked out? what if I don't know anyone in the new town and I'm isolated with a new baby?" and on and on and on. Because we don't have any confirmation yet, I cannot start to ACT on anything, just stress about it. I know that what I must do is learn to be okay with the unknown, that is where I need to put my energy. But I just can't help but fall into this spiral of worry. I'm not normally a really anxious type. I think this is coming partly from the pregnancy. I just want something, anything, to be known, to be settled. So .., I guess my question is ... are any of you also dealing with upheaval / stress made worse by pregnancy. How are you handling it?

[ChristSavesAll]

Sorry you are feeling so stressed momma, if you'd like some help to ease that, Kali Phos is good for stress and anxiety and for the trouble sleeping you can you Calm Forte by Hyland's, both of these are homeopathics and totally safe to use... Because you are pregnant, if you choose to pick those up, you should also pick up some pulsatilla as that is the number one pregnancy remedy for most preggo related ailments.

I remember being preggo with my littlest one, I was due in dec. and we were buying a house at the end of November, the house needed lots of different work, not that it wasn't livable, but we needed to tear out the carpeting, replace cabinets, flooring in the kitchen, paint, etc. Not to mention, MOVE : ) it was tiring work will being so big but we got it all done and she ended up waiting till JANUARY to come hahaha!

Hope you're able to relax soon

[ChristSavesAll]

http://www.lifehealthsolutions.com/library3/homeopathy/pulsatilla.htm

[fazer6]

Find a nice journal, a really nice book. When the 3am demons strike write it down. Once it is out in the open you stop going over and over again. Also get a guided relaxation cd to help you sleep. I used to use dolphin dreamtime when I was suffering in my early 20's. I think if you google hypnobabies peaceful sleep for all they have a free relaxation cd (or the sleeping one is a paid one, the free might just be general relaxation).

Do not worry, one step at a time. Your life will sort itself out. It's like a mountian. So daunting if you look at the top when you're at the bottom, so just look a few feet ahead.

But seriously create sleeping routines with essential oils nice candles and guided relaxation. Guided relaxation is better than drugs. It will help you get back to sleep.

[MsZelda]

the journal idea is a good one - I usually do all my writing on the computer and never want to fire that up in my bed (too stimulating) but a paper journal is good - I kept one religiously until my 30s but could probably use one more than ever right now. 

fazer - do you still have a blog? I checked your profile but didn't see a link ...

[MsZelda]

thank you for your kind words. I am craving stability right now but I realize that there are many many women who are in much more insecure situations than I am and get by.

[fazer6]

They must've taken the link out when they altered the profile pages, have put it back up there. I haven't updated it as much as I should have done so will hopefully get a bit more updating done. It just took me about 5 minutes to remember the password!

I think you have to find the stability in your life. It may not be as stable as you like it, but you'll probably find there are some areas of your life which are stable. I imagine it's the lack of control you don't like. You can see things spiralling out of control and won't be able to stop it. So to gain some control why not just sort through cupboards. If you're going to maybe move at some point then why not sort through cupboards and clear out things. Old clothes or just general junk that gets stored. It's easy to do and you'll really feel you've got some control and are achieving something.

With children it's always easy to find new people. You'll go to a park or soft play area or find some sort of group to go to. Everyone is having kids everywhere so you're never alone if you have a small person around.