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January 2012 Whatever Ladies Are All Done Having Their Babies! - Page 23

post #441 of 510
Thread Starter 
Mom2one ~ I think age has a lot to do with it. When D was really young, he could sleep in the same room with the boys playing and talking and it wouldn't wake him. As he's gotten older and more aware and wanting to be involved in things, he's more easily awakened.

I jinxed myself. After I said he's always good for the first hour, he woke up after only 30 minutes. lol.gif

Carrie ~ I haven't ever put any of them down awake. I guess I just equated that with having a nap schedule so it never occurred to me to do it. I don't think I'd know when would be the right time to do that since none of them ever had a set time for sleeping. I think I would get very frustrated trying to do that if baby didn't fall asleep. They've all had routines but not set times. KWIM? I just nurse when they want to nurse and, eventually, they doze off and I put them down. I can usually make a good guess based on the time whether or not babe will fall asleep at this or that nursing. There are a few times when I've tried laying down with them when I thought they were trying to sleep but being too distracted or disturbed. It was always hit or miss whether they'd actually fall asleep. I would get very frustrated and feel like I wasted a half hour if they didn't fall asleep.

What's the reason for you wanting to do that? Maybe if you explore that, you can find a solution you feel really good about.

I wouldn't say I'm laid back. I'd say more like resigned. I mostly just do the best I can do to get through each day.

I wish I could be more disciplined about bedtime with the older boys. I know that I could get them to sleep in their own beds in their own room if I worked at it. I just don't want to spend an hour plus every night doing bedtime, especially with Dylan. Kellen takes so long to settle that I'd be spending most of that time telling him to lay down and be quiet. It's much easier to just wait until he crashes.

Ok, one more pic because I think this is so sweet. Kellen is 11 months old in this photo.

448
post #442 of 510

MW: we don't have set naptimes either, though in the afternoon when Gabe is starting to get sleepy, I'll tell him to go get his blankey and have a cuddle (with it, not with me) and some days he does this without being asked. He's usually out in minutes once he gets it.

 

Most nights Gabe gets "put" to bed by one of us. sometimes it takes minutes, sometimes it takes an hour. I don't really tell him to be quiet or lay down. just sit in there with him until he figets himself to sleep. sometime he wants his head stroked or to lay down on the floor. sometimes he doesn't want to be touched at all. worth it though. Last night he crashed on the couch. But he woke up like 3 times in the night. poor DH, as it's his job to put him back down - at least with Norah, when she wakes, all I need to is pop boob in her mouth or at most change a diaper.

 

I used to be able to lay Gabe down awake before hes was mobile. Once he could roll to a sitting position and then pull himself up to standing, that didn't work anymore. Then I had to go back to nursing or rocking and then transferring him.

 

 

post #443 of 510
Quote:
Originally Posted by akind1 View Post

MW: we don't have set naptimes either, though in the afternoon when Gabe is starting to get sleepy, I'll tell him to go get his blankey and have a cuddle (with it, not with me) and some days he does this without being asked. He's usually out in minutes once he gets it.

 

Most nights Gabe gets "put" to bed by one of us. sometimes it takes minutes, sometimes it takes an hour. I don't really tell him to be quiet or lay down. just sit in there with him until he figets himself to sleep. sometime he wants his head stroked or to lay down on the floor. sometimes he doesn't want to be touched at all. worth it though. Last night he crashed on the couch. But he woke up like 3 times in the night. poor DH, as it's his job to put him back down - at least with Norah, when she wakes, all I need to is pop boob in her mouth or at most change a diaper.

 

I used to be able to lay Gabe down awake before hes was mobile. Once he could roll to a sitting position and then pull himself up to standing, that didn't work anymore. Then I had to go back to nursing or rocking and then transferring him.

 

 



Yeah - I wonder if I will have to do the same once Daxton is mobile?  It's not that I am trying to get him to sleep because it is "nap time", I can just tell that he is tired and is going to fall asleep - like he isn't really nursing just kind of holding it in his mouth, or like I said sometimes he is whining a little and by the time I get to him he is already asleep.

 

Carrie - Yeah I think I do have a good sleeper.  He def gets that from his dad!  DH can sleep through anything - He can sleep anywhere, anytime!  You could throw him on a big rock pile and he would fall asleep!  I am just going to enjoy it as long a I can!

 

Oh - after I said about him falling asleep in the swing I was getting really tired so I decided to take a nap so I picked him up out of the swing and took him to bed with me - he woke up a little and then once we got in bed he just had to have his face against the pillow (which kind of freaks me out - I have to wait until he is asleep and then I move it) and went back to sleep. Then he woke up hungry so I nursed him again and then I got up but he kept sleeping for a while longer - he's up now and very happy to see hi sisters again! 

 

I just hope the good sleeping sticks - the girls were a lot harder - Kacey was up nursing every two hours ( some nights) until she was over 2!

 

post #444 of 510
Thread Starter 
Well, things might be different here if I had another parent to help. That makes a big difference. If Sean were here, one of us could put the boys to bed while the other took care of Dylan. Sean has been gone so much over the years that we haven't been able to be consistent with it. When he's gone, I just do whatever works so that we all get the most sleep possible.

Kellen's not just fidgety. He jumps and runs around all over the place and yells and screams. So not worth it to fight with him about laying down in bed even if he was fidgety while laying there. When he was younger he used to fall asleep easily without any fuss. Not so much anymore, sort of. He just goes and goes and goes until he crashes. It's pretty funny, actually. We'll be in bed and he'll be talking and squirming and flopping all over the place one second and the next I realize he's not moving at all or making a sound and he's asleep. The nicest bedtimes for us have been when he's decided on his own to curl up on the couch with a blanket and just falls asleep. I can't stay up with him and Dylan like that anymore, though. I get way too tired.
post #445 of 510

If I didn't have DH or FIL to help put Gabe to bed, I would probably just bring Norah in with me while I sat with Gabe. I think. I can't always wait until he crashes because sometimes that is when he acts out the most so he really NEEDS to go to bed.

 

post #446 of 510

That picture is the sweetest thing I've ever seen!!  Awww!!!

 

That's all I do too, mw.  I just know when he'll doze off and when he won't.  Sometimes I set him down, sometimes I don't.  Sometimes he'll nap the entire time in arms (usually just one sleep cycle though).  It's all go with the flow.

 

I think it's b/c it's what you're "supposed" to do, and like I said, I compare myself too much to other ppl.  I know I do, I do it to a fault.  They all do this sort of thing.  I tell them not to stress so much over it, but then I turn around and wonder what I'm doing wrong or differently that it doesn't seem to work for my kids.  Who knows?  

 

Though, I don't know what I'm worried about.  I did what I always do and he just woke up from a 2.5 hour nap in his cosleeper.  I hereby give up trying to be someone I'm not!

 

Guys - I seriously just had a heart attack.  I drove off with my wallet on the roof of my car.  I took DD to school, dropped her off, and didn't realize it until I got home that it wasn't on the seat next to me.  I came in the house crying and DH was like it's ok, just retrace your route.  If it's not there, we'll deal with it.  I know he thinks I'm losing my mind.  I think I am too!!  Luckily, it was in the middle of the road not too far from my house.  I feel like OMG.  How did I just DO that???

post #447 of 510

at least it was only your wallet! I am so glad you found it!

 

the living social deal for today was a membership for the children's museum at 1/2 off (or more) - we had to snag it! I'm so excited. -

post #448 of 510
Quote:
Originally Posted by akind1 View Post

If I didn't have DH or FIL to help put Gabe to bed, I would probably just bring Norah in with me while I sat with Gabe. I think. I can't always wait until he crashes because sometimes that is when he acts out the most so he really NEEDS to go to bed.

 



This is Kacey - she just keeps getting more and more wound up and acts out more and more until we are all so sick of her! lol  On the plus side - she falls asleep so fast when bedtime is left until she is at this point!  



Quote:
Originally Posted by MarineWife View Post

Well, things might be different here if I had another parent to help. That makes a big difference. If Sean were here, one of us could put the boys to bed while the other took care of Dylan. Sean has been gone so much over the years that we haven't been able to be consistent with it. When he's gone, I just do whatever works so that we all get the most sleep possible.
 


Yeah - you have a different situation than all of us - you have to be both parents!  I honestly don't know how you do it!  I have only had today being alone with the kids in a few days and I am about to go insane!  It doesn't help that they don't listen to me as well as they do to DH - and that is totally my fault - but seriously - You are superwoman to do it all by yourself every day!

 

 

Carrie - That would have been me - totally freaking out!  I am so glad you found it though!  

 

post #449 of 510
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by akind1 View Post

If I didn't have DH or FIL to help put Gabe to bed, I would probably just bring Norah in with me while I sat with Gabe.


This is what I do. I just do it when we are all going to bed rather than at a separate time for him and/or Ethan. I have tried to go to bed with Kellen earlier and sit in the room with him but, if anyone else is up, he stays up. I can't turn all the lights out and lay down that early because Dylan is not usually ready to sleep and he'll will fuss and cry. It ends up being very frustrating for me trying to sit there for 2+ hours waiting for everyone else to fall asleep. Then I'm ready to go to sleep anyway so I don't really see the point in doing that. KWIM? It doesn't save any time or frustration or anything.

Kellen is a major handful. Most of the time I don't have any idea what to do with him. He can run around outside most of the day and still come in and be crazy at night. Nothing seems to calm him.

Carrie ~ I think all of that comes from the idea that we have to teach babies how to sleep properly and we shouldn't allow them to be too dependent on us. I just find that so silly. I know I've said before that babies will sleep when they are tired. I know some people have sleep fighters or babies that don't sleep much but they are the exception rather than the rule. Of course, natural sleep is harder to come by these days with all the media and artificial lighting we can have on all the time. WRT the dependence thing, I believe that if we allow our babies and children to be however dependent they need to be on us now, they will be more secure and independent when they are older.

Do the people you know who do that do any form of CIO?

Dylan finally fell asleep again. Ethan has basketball practice at 5:15 but I don't think we're going to make it. I'm just too tired and do not want to wake D up for that. I'm trying the white noise thing. I have ceiling fans in the bedrooms but they don't make much noise so I set the TV to a station that doesn't come in. Course, since this is his first real nap today I won't know if he stays asleep from exhaustion or the white noise.

Thanks, mom2one, but I don't feel like any kind of superwoman. It's just something I do because I don't have a choice (other than to not have kids, of course).
post #450 of 510

Have you ladies noticed that all of your kids will hit a rough patch all at the same time?!? Not so much today - because M is so sick, but just in general, this past month has been H.E.L.L. 

Just whine, need this, whine, need that, hungry, whine, whine, whine lol.gif And then A is in her very frustrating beginning of toddler-ness stage. She climbs up something and can't get down and cries. TRIES to get down and doinks herself somewhere and cries. Cries to be picked up and the squiggles to get down immediately after nut.gif J is always wanting her hair or her dolls hair to be put up. And she is VERY particular about it so she usually takes it out within 5 minutes and wants me to put it up AGAIN and I just lose it after about the 10000000000 millionth time.

 

M is 3. nuff said.

 

K is pretty easy since she's older. Her homework drives me crazy though. I don't know what they do in public school for 7 hours to have to come home and have 1-2 hours of homework! I wish she didn't want to go, but she does, and so there you have it......

 

MW - how would that work for you? Are you so against it that even if your child WANTED and/or asked to go to public school you wouldn't let them? That is how my mom was. I'm kind of torn, because although I don't regret anything about not going to public school - and even had an awesome high school experience with being able to work and travel and take college courses but I DID want to go to public school in younger years but knew my mom wouldn't let me. Not sure I want that feeling for my kids.

 

RE: white noise.

I know how much it works because recently our power went out during a snow storm. It was about 9ish and A woke up for a snack so I was actually upstairs nursing her when it happened. I could hear nothing with the fan on - but with it off.......wow, every little word someone said! yikes! I do use a "real" fan. They are like 15 bucks at target. I am not sure they sell them this time of year, but I think they do.

post #451 of 510

Baby_Cakes, I just read your thread on FB about your DS falling asleep on the floor and all the comments from the preggo lady...LMAO! She's in for a rude awakening! Babies don't follow the "What to Expect the First Year" book and the stuff she's spouting sounds like it comes from that! ROTFLMAO.gif

 

O.K. so I must have a super stinky baby or either I have more sensory issues than I thought! DD can't go more than two days w/out a bath. I usually bathe her every day, at the most every other day. She gets sticky and smells sweaty. She runs hot like her dad and when she sweats, her hair gets wet. She needs a bath every day.

post #452 of 510
Thread Starter 
Ethan says he wants to go to public school but I won't let him. Maybe when he's older, like high school age, and won't be so susceptible to influence but not when he's so young that he doesn't fully understand what it's like. I think the constraints of institutionalized schooling are harmful. I think they stunt real learning. I think the reliance on a grading system, rewards and punishments, and competitiveness and comparison to others is harmful. I am that opposed to it. bag.gif
post #453 of 510

I've given up on trying to get DD to sleep for a prescribed amount of time. Just won't happen. She will either sleep 20-30 mins or 2 hours. shrug.gif The house can be loud or quiet, the room dark or bright. Doesn't matter. I do keep the exhaust fan in the bathroom running all the time for white noise. And I turn her sleep sheep on when I put her down. But other than that, I can't do much to help her stay asleep. She sometimes won't sleep long even if I'm laying in the bed with her. If she's ready to get up, she starts playing with my face...lol.gif

post #454 of 510

Carrie: don't know how close this is to you, but sounds interesting: http://www.meetup.com/AttachedMomsMontclair/ 

 

Thing about breast feeding is I am so hungry, does this go away?! I forget

post #455 of 510
Quote:
Originally Posted by MarineWife View Post


Carrie ~ I think all of that comes from the idea that we have to teach babies how to sleep properly and we shouldn't allow them to be too dependent on us. I just find that so silly. I know I've said before that babies will sleep when they are tired. I know some people have sleep fighters or babies that don't sleep much but they are the exception rather than the rule. Of course, natural sleep is harder to come by these days with all the media and artificial lighting we can have on all the time. WRT the dependence thing, I believe that if we allow our babies and children to be however dependent they need to be on us now, they will be more secure and independent when they are older.
Do the people you know who do that do any form of CIO?

Dylan finally fell asleep again. Ethan has basketball practice at 5:15 but I don't think we're going to make it. I'm just too tired and do not want to wake D up for that. I'm trying the white noise thing. I have ceiling fans in the bedrooms but they don't make much noise so I set the TV to a station that doesn't come in. Course, since this is his first real nap today I won't know if he stays asleep from exhaustion or the white noise.
Thanks, mom2one, but I don't feel like any kind of superwoman. It's just something I do because I don't have a choice (other than to not have kids, of course).


I find it silly and unimportant.  I do.  I've read all the studies and agree with the experts, but then I go and still get sucked in.

Some do modified sleep training, but most don't.  My one good friend was just very persistent.  I feel like she's just more on top of things than I am.  Her home is always clean, her kid naps and sleeps thru the night, she's pretty, she's everything.  But I also know appearances can be deceiving and I don't always know what goes on behind closed doors.  So.  There's that too.

 

How did the evening go?  Did he sleep well?

 

All moms are superwomen.

 



Quote:
Originally Posted by AnnieA View Post

Baby_Cakes, I just read your thread on FB about your DS falling asleep on the floor and all the comments from the preggo lady...LMAO! She's in for a rude awakening! Babies don't follow the "What to Expect the First Year" book and the stuff she's spouting sounds like it comes from that! ROTFLMAO.gif


THANK you!! You see what I"m saying???  Geez.  I mean, I think she means well but she's all laaa-dee-dah that's not what my parenting teacher said or that's not what the book says.  Tsk tsk!!

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by akind1 View Post

Carrie: don't know how close this is to you, but sounds interesting: http://www.meetup.com/AttachedMomsMontclair/ 

 

Thing about breast feeding is I am so hungry, does this go away?! I forget



Ooh I will check that link.  Montclair is far.  I tried to join the North Jersey Mom group of something or another, but b/c I'm not in North Jersey I wasn't allowed in.  It was dumb b/c I'm literally only 20 min away.  

 

I'm always hungry!! I feel like its better now than it was a few months ago.  Now I just am tired and want to eat crap.  I don't ever feel like eating healthy.  I still have 2 lbs before I get to my prepreg weight, and I haven't been running as much as I was b/c I'm just so TIRED.  I don't have the energy.  I would ideally like to lose a bit more before summer/shorts and tanktop/bathing suit weather.

 

We did ok last night.  Finn resettled himself in the cosleeper a handful of times, and I only nursed twice between 930 and 4.  Woo hoo!  Then I brought him in bed with me and we got up for the day at 730.

Chris is sleeping like crap lately so he's been on the couch.  It makes me feel guilty, but what can I do?  He's taking melatonin and snoring really badly, waking up me and the baby.  So, he's been out in the living room.

He's leaving again today to go to DC but he will be back tomorrow night.

post #456 of 510

I am totally ignorant of NJ/NY geography LOL - but it sounded otherwise right up your alley as far as AP practices and stuff.

 

I had both cheesecake and icecream last night. isn't that awful? The thing is, I don't eat a whole lot of crap, other than the fact I do eat lots of carbs. Need to up my protein intake. Like yesterday I had a bowl of dry cereal for breakfast, leftover spaghetti and some cheesy broccoli rice for lunch (DS ate 1/2 the rice for me), and then creamy chicken and rice with broccoli for dinner. See, that doesn't look like alot, and I would honestly probably eat more, if there was anything in the house I wanted to eat! but there isn't. I need to stock up on nuts again, but they aren't the cheapest snack food. and I can't eat them around DS because I'm still not sure if he would choke on them or not.

 

Poor Chris! but at least he is getting sleep somewhere! I don't know how we slept. We went up around midnight and I laid her in the pack-n-play and slept for a while that way. At some point I brought her to bed with us and she nursed twice between whenever that was and when we woke up at 7. I feel pretty refreshed, so I think we must have slept ok.

 

I am still about 10 pounds less than PP weight - which is great! - but I would love to lose another 15 before summer. thinking about doing couch to 5K. is there an app for that?

post #457 of 510
Quote:
Originally Posted by akind1 View Post

I am still about 10 pounds less than PP weight - which is great! - but I would love to lose another 15 before summer. thinking about doing couch to 5K. is there an app for that?

 

Yup - that's how I did it!  What phone do you have?  I did C25K Pro.  It was free when I got it thru Amazon, but the regular C25K (not pro) is free all the time.  It was a good program!  I'm doing the Bridge to 10K now (well, when I get to run, lol).  

 

Mm.  Cheesecake.  I think that's one of the hardest things to go w/o as a vegan.  I miss it!

 

I tend to nom on wheat thins, crackers, cookies, popcorn.  All little things that are tasty in the moment but not really filling or good for you overall.

 

 

 

post #458 of 510

do they not make some sort of tofu based version? just curious . . .

 

I am not really a cracker person, unless I have some sort of cheese to go on top. or dip . . . need to work on healthy snacks!

post #459 of 510
Thread Starter 
I must have missed some posts because I didn't see the one where Annie mentioned the FB thread.

I feel like crap. I think I'm working on 3 days without much sleep now. I will say it. Dylan is NOT a "good" sleeper. Of course, that doesn't mean he's a bad baby (Although, I did say that to Ryan last night, jokingly. I had to vent some steam. I even said, "I never thought I would say this, but...") Ryan saved us both!

Last night I thought I was going to lose it because Dylan fell asleep for about a half hour around 10:30 but woke back up around 11. I had not gotten any sleep the night before because he was squirmy and fussy every hour. Around midnight I got up and told Ryan I was going to lose it if he didn't take the baby. He did and I laid back down in bed.

After a little while, I went to check on them and he was holding Dylan across his lap and Dylan was staring up at him with one hand on Ryan's chest. It was the sweetest thing. I said I'd take Dylan back but Ryan said he was fine. He'd bring Dylan in when he was ready. Even when Dylan started to get fussy, Ryan got up and stood in a dark room holding him and rocking him until he fell asleep.

It would have been nice if he had stayed asleep but he didn't. He was very fussy and squirmy all night again and kept me up. I'm pretty sure it's gas because whenever he gets really fussy and stiff he lets out a big fart. And, they have been stinky lately! Whew!

Carrie ~ Have you thought about if Finn's bad nights have something to do with what you ate that day? Dylan started having the major gas and restlessness 3 nights ago (I think). That night I had black beans for dinner. I haven't eaten beans since he was first born because it seemed to cause him a lot of gas. I was hoping he'd be over that now but maybe not. Yesterday, I ate some spicy cheese dip. I think that may have contributed to his problems last night. I may have to go back to eating very mild, bland foods. That will put a huge damper on my vegetarian plans. I want the Chana Masala so badly!

Kat ~ I'm not hungry so much anymore. I actually don't have much of an appetite at all. I usually end up forcing myself to eat when I realize I'm so hungry that my stomach hurts and I feel sick. There's just too much other stuff I want to do rather than eating. I haven't really lost any weight for a few weeks, though. I'm stuck at 129 lbs., I think. My body fat percentage has dropped, though, so I may still be losing but it's not as noticeable in my weight, if that makes sense.

I'm not much of a crunchy, salty, carb snacker. I always had a sweet tooth. That seems to have gone away since I got pg with Dylan. I really don't have a taste for sweet stuff anymore. It's very strange. I used to love cheesecake. I can't count how many times I said I'd live off cheesecake if I could. Now I have no taste for it at all. The thought of eating it turns my stomach.

I do like crackers and humus but they have to be substantial crackers, not saltines or Townhouse crackers. My commissary sells some rice crackers that are really good. They're not like the plain, thin ones you find in the Asian section. They are made with brown rice and are thick and good. Ryan came down into the kitchen and complained about me getting gluten free stuff, tasted the crackers and walked off with the box. lol.gif

I try to eat eggs most mornings for breakfast to make sure I get some protein right off the bat. Lunch is always a hard one for me. I especially don't like to cook in the middle of the day but I don't like sandwiches. Sometimes I'll have a salad with left overs from dinner but I'm not good at being consistent about that. Sometimes the left overs sit in the fridge until I throw them out.
post #460 of 510
Thread Starter 
Dylan and nursing. he is such a squirmer. he kicks his legs all over the place. he has recently, in the past 2-3 days, started clawing and pulling at his head and hair. for a few weeks he has been clawing at me, especially when we are laying down. it hurts! in addition, he kicks me constantly. i get so annoyed by it. i get overtouched much more quickly when he does that. i don't know what to do.

AnnieA ~ i know you're preoccupied but i've been wanting to ask you a question. You mentioned a while back that one of your children was like Kellen in that he gets wild and annoys everyone else. You said that, for the most part, you try to ignore the behavior. What happens when you do that? What do you do when the other kids get so annoyed that they get angry at him? Or do they not ever get that annoyed? Maybe because they are older they are better able to handle it themselves by walking away or something else? shrug.gif
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