Hmmm, why make it an issue? I just never told the dentist our breastfeeding status and it never really came up. I'd recommend finding a dentist that is great with children and near you and going there. I think the only real thing dentist tend to fuss about with breastfeeding is night nursing-- there's a lot of good info out showing that it really isn't concerning but it also isn't likely to come up if you don't volunteer the info.
I can recommend the dentist we saw when we were in Plymouth (Dr Morlan). He's not necessarily holistic minded, but is good with kids. I haven't heard of any holistic minded dentist around the S Shore- although I can ask about a place in Duxbury. There may be one on the Cape I've heard of- but that's probably too far for you.
Most dentists will want to do a fluoride treatment, so if you want to opt out, make sure you let them know. It's almost assumed and they may try to do it w/o any warning or disclosure. The last hygienist I talked to has a child that has severe allergies and she declines the fluoride because the company will not divulge all of their ingredients. She called the company to discuss and they told her not to give it to her son after she mentioned the things he was allergic to, but wouldn't tell her the ingredients. I thought that was really disturbing.
More tips... tell them you want to hold your child on your lap during the exams because she will stay still better and stay more calm, etc. Our dentist was fine with that but some wont' allow parents back with the child- which I really wanted to avoid. Anyways, I'm sure you probably knew that. It would definitely be something I found out before making an appointment just because of the other parents who seemed to have problems with this.
Dentists must be on people's minds, I just did a post yesterday about dentist for another local mom- and was at the dentist myself!!
I hope she's okay!!