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New year, new chat thread - Page 2

post #21 of 95
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jbouck5 View Post

Ugh my tummy has been out of whack since I had the baby too! I am so gassy now, I was never gassy before greensad.gif why does that happen?


I was told it's because your intestines are falling back into place - it can be really painful and i sometimes think my pm gas wakes LO :)!

post #22 of 95
Quote:
Originally Posted by Beckily View Post

http://crappypictures.typepad.com/crappy-pictures/2012/01/the-uppers-downers-of-parenting-or-coffee-wine.html

Carrie posted this, it's needed in this conversation ;)



yup - I love that!!!!

post #23 of 95
Speaking of wine (or in my case beer) how do you guys approach drinking wine or beer while you are still breastfeeding? The MWs told me just to space out drinking and nursing by at least an hour, but in my own research I read that the alcohol level in bm peaks an hour after ingestion. Fwiw I only ever have one beer at a time, and nurse it slowly, so my blood alcohol level never gets very high. I'm interested in what everyone else does.
post #24 of 95
Thread Starter 

I'll have a drink every once in a while, but I'm more worried about drinking & co-sleeping than drinking & breastfeeding, so that's what keeps me from having more than 1 or 2 drinks.  But....DH bought an awesome bottle of wine for our Christmas dinner with just the two of us, and to be honest, we polished that bottle off. But we stayed up pretty late for a few more hours after that before going to bed. 

 

This is a great post from a blogger that I really admire, about alcohol and breastfeeding. She says, "The takeaway message: Long before you have enough alcohol in your milk for your baby to even notice, you would be so hammered that you would hardly remember you even had a baby."

post #25 of 95
Quote:
Originally Posted by cat13 View Post

I'll have a drink every once in a while, but I'm more worried about drinking & co-sleeping than drinking & breastfeeding, so that's what keeps me from having more than 1 or 2 drinks.  But....DH bought an awesome bottle of wine for our Christmas dinner with just the two of us, and to be honest, we polished that bottle off. But we stayed up pretty late for a few more hours after that before going to bed. 

 

This is a great post from a blogger that I really admire, about alcohol and breastfeeding. She says, "The takeaway message: Long before you have enough alcohol in your milk for your baby to even notice, you would be so hammered that you would hardly remember you even had a baby."


that's funny!!!

 

I worried at the beginning that the taste of my dinner wine would bother lO- he doesnt seem bothered at all.  i will have a glass-glass and 1/2 with dinner nightly- he gets nursed down right after that and Im nowhere near incapacitated - that's been a while!!! im wide awake and up at his slightest moves ALL NIGHT LONG- maybe the key to continuing to co-sleep with this squirmy/kicking /flailing boy is MORE WINE!!!! Yeah, that's it- the crib or more wine..hmmmm...making sense in my sleep-deprived brain LOL

 

post #26 of 95
Quote:
Originally Posted by Beckily View Post

http://crappypictures.typepad.com/crappy-pictures/2012/01/the-uppers-downers-of-parenting-or-coffee-wine.html
Carrie posted this, it's needed in this conversation wink1.gif

ROTFLMAO.gif Thanks for that! orngbiggrin.gif I go by the "if I've had enough alcohol to feel it I should wait a bit to nurse" theory. Granted, half a beer gets me nice and mellow these days...and with DD waking so often I've been hesitant to crack one open.
post #27 of 95

Feeling done in.

It's dark at 4, we haven't been out of the house for fun in weeks. We're moving so we have to pack. Charlie's fussy and his drool stings my hands and it feels like he's bringing in four teeth at once. He keeps getting rashes, probably a teething thing. We have no money but have to pay out a whole lot soon so that we can move. We should get it, so that's good.

Looks like there could be amazing things coming from Dusty's work. Scary to get your hopes up and that adds to the overall stress.

 

I just feel tired. Charlie needs things and I feel like all I can offer is a tit and a body to lean on.

 

Hope this goes away soon. I think it should after the move. I just hate moving. So excited for the new house (most of the time) but I hate the change and the transition and all the freaking work. I start to pack, he needs to nurse. I don't keep track anymore of how often he's eating at night, but it's quite a bit.

 

 

Whiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine.

post #28 of 95
Thread Starter 

I hate moving, I'm sorry you have to do it. Do you have any friends that can come over and keep you company and play with Charlie while you pack? If not, I'll do it... just buy me a plane ticket!

post #29 of 95

You have my sympathies Beckily. I wish I lived closer to help you out.

 

We moved from a large house to a tiny apartment when DS1 was 6 months old. Then we moved from the apartment to our wonderful townhouse when DS1 was 17 months & DS2 was 2 months. Neither move was fun and this last move will hopefully be our last move. We only just finished unpacking during the Holidays, and only because DH had some time off. I do still have some toys to sort through, pictures to hang, and major reorganization to take care of, but with both boys teething it can wait.

 

All I can suggest to get you through it is to think of how wonderful it will be to see Charlie grow in this new place.

 

As for the "all I can offer is boob/body" try to remind yourself that at this point in Charlie's life that is what he wants and needs more than anything else. You are a wonderful mom. You are an amazing woman. You are giving your son the best possible start in his life that he could ever want. Believe me even as they grow they generally don't need/want much other than you. DS1 has a lot of toys (mostly handed down from other people) and his favorite things to play with are just regular household items like the dust pan or the toilet plunger as seen in this pic:

Picture 066.jpg

 

My whine right now is how much fun it isn't to have both boys teething and thus crying at me at the same time. Yet I am trying to remind myself each time it happens that not only will this pass, it will pass by quicker than I really want it to.

post #30 of 95
Quote:
Originally Posted by Beckily View Post

I just feel tired. Charlie needs things and I feel like all I can offer is a tit and a body to lean on.

 

Hope this goes away soon. I think it should after the move. I just hate moving. So excited for the new house (most of the time) but I hate the change and the transition and all the freaking work. I start to pack, he needs to nurse. I don't keep track anymore of how often he's eating at night, but it's quite a bit.

 

 

Whiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine.



Hang in there, my friend.  All Charlie needs is you -- that is OVERWHELMING.  It's got to be hard being responsible now for packing in addition to being someone's entire universe.  You are strong and can get thru this.  In the interim, whine away.  We are listening and nodding along sympathetically.   Hugs hugs huggggggs!!



Quote:
Originally Posted by Lynann View Post

 

My whine right now is how much fun it isn't to have both boys teething and thus crying at me at the same time. Yet I am trying to remind myself each time it happens that not only will this pass, it will pass by quicker than I really want it to.

 

Sucks.  I have to say though, if this is any consolation, at least here, the older sibling seems to always have issues right when the baby does, too.  When Finn was nightwaking at his worst, so was Nora.  When Finn is nice and behaved, so is Nora.  It's crazy.  I so look forward to the moments of calm -- and not so much to the moments of chaos!  Hang in there to you too!!  Keep thinking of how sweet these brothers will be to have each other all through life.

 

AFUs - The sleep gods have been so kind to us that I'm nervous to even talk about it!  I've been working on getting Finnley out of the swaddle and so far it's going well.  I leave his one arm out and he's quick to settle (at least, quick by my standards).  Last night was probably the best night of sleep ever.  He slept in the swing from about 9-12 when I decided to dream feed him and go to bed.  He didn't wake up at all when I put him in his cosleeper and slept til 330.  So 9-330???  I'll take it.  I think at that time I even just gave him his paci b/c he wasn't crying, just moving around, and he slept til 430 when (cue angels singing) I brought him in bed to side lie nurse and we both nursed/slept until 715!!  NO puke!  

 

jumpers.gif

I have to say...I feel like I'm finally getting to experience what I thought I would from the beginning.  Snuggles with him in bed.  Waking up to his gorgeous little face.  Now when he wakes up he sees me first thing and he's cradled in my arm, and I can smother him in kisses and whisper good morning to him.  It is just wonderful.  Amazing.  Plus he's finally at the age where he smiles back and coos and giggles at me.  

 

I'm making huge changes with cleaning around the house and working hard to come up with a routine to organize/declutter.  It's amazing.  I won't bore you all with the deets but I feel like a new woman/mother/home maker.

 

DH is leaving today for his first business trip since Finn was born.  He'll be gone until Saturday, in NC.  Oh man.  I'm not nervous at all, and THAT's what scares me!  Nora has school Wed/Fri, so that should help if things get overwhelming, and my MIL isn't working this week in case I need some help.  But...I think I got this.  Is that bad?  Ha!  Maybe I'm just in denial?


 

 

post #31 of 95

Carrie its so nice to read that things are going so well. May the days of being covered in puke be over. I would love to be as motivated as you on the household chores.

 

I am back to baking fresh bread and made a batch of granola this past weekend. I did also get another batch of laundry detergent made and finish unpacking while DH was off during the Holidays. Its the rest of the everyday stuff that is driving me nuts yet I remain unmotivated.

 

I have such a large to-do-list right now that I find myself hiding from all of it by coming online. I have several sewing projects currently on the go, an unfinished wool soaker in DS2's current size, which by the time I finish it will be too small and have to be put away for the next time. I have major reorganizing to do. Things were just being put where ever as we were unpacking, and now that its all done I need to go back and actually organize and put things in sensible places, not to mention I want to make room somewhere for all my fabric supplies (some of it old clothes I'm planning on recycling) that will give me easier access and let me see what I have to work with at a glance. Right now its all in a big storage tub and I always end up having to pull it all out to get what I want/need so I put off some of the sewing work as a result.

 

Right now I'm working on turning some old t-shirts into footed leggings/pants for DS1. This is kind of urgent as he has been scratching at a graze on his foot so that everytime it just about gets healed up he'll scratch it up so that it starts bleeding again. I have been keeping him in his footed sleepers 24/7 to try and give the skin a chance to heal, then just this weekend came up with the idea of making footed leggings so he can wear clothes and we can actually take him out in public. I finished the first pair this morning and he has them on now. So far its working, but I'll have to see what happens when he gets up from his nap, as its mostly when he is in his crib that he scratches himself. I've already got the second pair cut, and would like to have them ready for him to wear tomorrow. I'm planning on making about 5 pairs, hopefully by the end of the week. That however depends on how much time I get to work on them. Yesterday DS2 went on a nap strike and went into total meltdown mode. His very loud crying kept DS1 awake during his nap time, so he cried and moaned too. DS2 also decided since he wasn't sleeping that the only thing to do was cling to my boob, which was out for nearly 3 hours while he cried, sucked & cried and catnapped for a few minutes at a time. All I can say is "Thank You Lord for Hulu." or I'd have gone crazy yesterday.

 

Today is going much better. Both boys are currently sleeping for their afternoon nap. I've actually managed a shower & lunch and now I need to get back to sewing those footed leggings for DS1.

 

I will say, that while it is stressful at times, and there are moments when I long to be able to do lunch with friends (my boys sleep when everyone else does lunch!) I would not swap being a SAHM for anything.

post #32 of 95
Quote:
Originally Posted by Baby_Cakes View Post



Hang in there, my friend.  All Charlie needs is you -- that is OVERWHELMING.  It's got to be hard being responsible now for packing in addition to being someone's entire universe.  You are strong and can get thru this.  In the interim, whine away.  We are listening and nodding along sympathetically.   Hugs hugs huggggggs!!

 

Sucks.  I have to say though, if this is any consolation, at least here, the older sibling seems to always have issues right when the baby does, too.  When Finn was nightwaking at his worst, so was Nora.  When Finn is nice and behaved, so is Nora.  It's crazy.  I so look forward to the moments of calm -- and not so much to the moments of chaos!  Hang in there to you too!!  Keep thinking of how sweet these brothers will be to have each other all through life.

 

AFUs - The sleep gods have been so kind to us that I'm nervous to even talk about it!  I've been working on getting Finnley out of the swaddle and so far it's going well.  I leave his one arm out and he's quick to settle (at least, quick by my standards).  Last night was probably the best night of sleep ever.  He slept in the swing from about 9-12 when I decided to dream feed him and go to bed.  He didn't wake up at all when I put him in his cosleeper and slept til 330.  So 9-330???  I'll take it.  I think at that time I even just gave him his paci b/c he wasn't crying, just moving around, and he slept til 430 when (cue angels singing) I brought him in bed to side lie nurse and we both nursed/slept until 715!!  NO puke!  

 

jumpers.gif

I have to say...I feel like I'm finally getting to experience what I thought I would from the beginning.  Snuggles with him in bed.  Waking up to his gorgeous little face.  Now when he wakes up he sees me first thing and he's cradled in my arm, and I can smother him in kisses and whisper good morning to him.  It is just wonderful.  Amazing.  Plus he's finally at the age where he smiles back and coos and giggles at me.  

 

I'm making huge changes with cleaning around the house and working hard to come up with a routine to organize/declutter.  It's amazing.  I won't bore you all with the deets but I feel like a new woman/mother/home maker.

 

DH is leaving today for his first business trip since Finn was born.  He'll be gone until Saturday, in NC.  Oh man.  I'm not nervous at all, and THAT's what scares me!  Nora has school Wed/Fri, so that should help if things get overwhelming, and my MIL isn't working this week in case I need some help.  But...I think I got this.  Is that bad?  Ha!  Maybe I'm just in denial?


 

 


oh, please bore us with the details - i could use some inspiration!!!!  I feel less overwhelmed with the house crap the older LO gets and try to pick away at it each day - when I have time...and energy- which doesnt happen much.

 

I think Ill start praying to your sleep God.  That night sounds amazing!!!!!  We were getting lots of those at one point and now most nights I can only hope for some rest here and there - ugh.  Makes such a difference to me if I get sleep- this too shall pass...

 

post #33 of 95

Thank you, guys!

As I whine, I always think of you, Lyn, because you did it with TWO so I figure I can do it, too. I'm actually doing pretty well and getting rid of a lot of stuff.

 

And woke up this morning with a cold, so that would explain the exhaustion. Yee.

 

Charlie and I had a romantic bath last night and it really really helped. Well. Less romance since it was a baby, but the details were romantic. Tub for two, I brought in my red lamp so it was soft fabulous light. I had music going. The water was deeper than he's used to so he was a bit confused. He came in and was all "BATH! KICK!" but then the water was deep and he looked up and saw the lamp (which he adores) and he got all snuggly. It was great. He laid on my legs, head on my belly and just soaked for a long time. Nursed twice. We snuggled.

That was how I used to take baths when I was pregnant and I'd hold him and talk to him about the future, so yesterday I snuggled him and talked about before he was born.

It was pretty amazing, actually. I'm going to miss that tub.

 

Lyn - So sorry they're both teething at once! Awesome that you're back to baking. I made granola bars the other day, myself. Cooking helps, I think.

My friend bought her kid her own toilet brush when she was younger because she liked them so much. Kids are awesome.

 

And Carrie - YAY. So glad you're finally getting that time! :D

post #34 of 95

Aw, becky, thinking of you talking to Charlie like that made me teary!  What a precious moment!  I wish I could find more of those!

 

Speaking of romance/baby...Is the sex drive thing ever going to come back?  I'm almost turned OFF by DH.  I don't mind doing things for him or being romantical FOR him, but I do NOT want to be touched.  Ever.  Don't rub my shoulders.  Don't kiss my neck.  Just DONT.

Ugh. 

I'm annoyed with myself.  I give myself pep talks and tell myself not to be this way but I can't shake it.  What gives?

 

Oh, and did everyone decide on BC already?

DH decided to drop the bomb on me the other night that he's not ready to say no more kids ever.  Greaaaatt.  Now what?  I'm afraid CTA and FAM will make me want a baby.  And no.  I'm done. DONE!

post #35 of 95

Sorry about your lack of sex drive. I am the opposite, myself. We impatiently waited the 3 weeks until I stopped bleeding and now I want it daily again. He doesn't, sadly, too tired from overworking himself.

 

Good luck about more babies. That's not an easy thing to disagree on. Ugh.

post #36 of 95
Quote:
Originally Posted by Beckily View Post

Good luck about more babies. That's not an easy thing to disagree on. Ugh.



Well, I will clarify that he didn't say he wanted more.  He just said he wasn't ready to say no more ever.  So it's not like he wants one and I don't.  It's like he's not sure he never will.  I can respect that.  You know?

post #37 of 95

Carrie--after reading your post I have 2 thoughts.  One is that after DD I really did not have much of a sex drive for quite a while.   I don't really remember when it came back, but it did gradually.  The second is that maybe one of the reasons you don't want to be touched is that you and your DH aren't on the same page as far as having/not having any more children.  I think one of the reasons it took a while with DD was that DP and I weren't really on the same page as far as me working/staying at home.  Once we came to an agreement things changed thumb.gif

 

As far as BC, we aren't using any, but I would like to have another baby and DP is fine if we have another baby (he isn't sure he wants to as in let try for it, but also is not at all opposed to it if is happens).  

 

Beckily--moving with a baby would be hard.  I have a hard enough time just making time to declutter with the 2 I have.

post #38 of 95
Thread Starter 

I just got back from a visit to my Women's Health doc, who I love. I've been on the mini pill but she said I need to switch to another kind as soon as DS starts STTN (doubt that will happy anytime soon) or eating solids. So, she prescribed me another kind of pill and I'll just get the pharmacy to fill it when I'm ready. I actually HATE the pill, but right now my insurance will make me pay $500 for the Mirena IUD. I absolutely loved my Mirena before and had it for about 3 years. I got my BFP about 6 weeks after I had it removed. She said that our HMO is having a big change up in Aug and she hopes the Mirena will be covered 100% then, so I'm stuck with the pill for now.

 

But in all honesty, I really don't even need anything, since we rarely DTD anymore. I lost my sex drive at about 8 months preggo and now I don't just lack a sex drive, but I don't even want to be touched at all (I hear you Carrie). I do stuff for DH occasionally so he doesn't go crazy, but I don't want anything for me. It's sad because I feel like it's distancing us a bit. I'm just thankful that we can talk openly about it and he is sympathetic. Ugh.

post #39 of 95

Lyn - I give you credit for being so crafty and getting projects done!  I'm still just working on cleaning.  Someday I'll be crafty.  Someday.  
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by earth-mama View Post

Carrie--after reading your post I have 2 thoughts.  One is that after DD I really did not have much of a sex drive for quite a while.   I don't really remember when it came back, but it did gradually.  The second is that maybe one of the reasons you don't want to be touched is that you and your DH aren't on the same page as far as having/not having any more children.  I think one of the reasons it took a while with DD was that DP and I weren't really on the same page as far as me working/staying at home.  Once we came to an agreement things changed thumb.gif


Hmm, good points, both.  He really doesn't want more NOW.  He just says things like, "I can't say in 5 years I'll feel the same".  You know what I mean?

I have bad dreams sometimes that I POAS and its positive and I'm just devastated.  I don't like bad dreams.  They mean things, and I don't want them to mean what they mean.

I think too part of my problem is that I feel just wiped out by the end of the day.  He always wants action after 11 pm, after a full day when I've worn myself out and already put both kids to bed.  I could usually go for a quickie at 3 pm, but he's busy working usually.  We just need to find time when we're both interested.  

 

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by nald1 View Post

oh, please bore us with the details - i could use some inspiration!!!!  I feel less overwhelmed with the house crap the older LO gets and try to pick away at it each day - when I have time...and energy- which doesnt happen much.

 

I just got bit by some kind of bug, I think.  10 min cleaning sessions WORK.  I set the timer and DD and I do a quick 10 min of the living room.  It's amazing.  And today I didn't feel much like doing the kitchen, but I set the 10 min timer and wouldn't you know?  I got the dishes unloaded, the sink emptied and the dishwasher reloaded, the pots washed, the counter wiped down.  It only took 10 minutes!  I couldn't believe it!  

 

I also decided to scrub the sticky spots on the floor.  I read a trick that if you scrub those spots up it gives the look of a clean floor, and you can put off mopping.  Being that I don't even own a mop, I thought it could help. shy.gif  It did.

 

Yesterday I deep cleaned the bathroom.  That took longer, maybe 30 min, but still.  I read if you wipe down the surfaces daily, your weekly deep clean will be super quick.  This link is super helpful:

 

http://www.home-ec101.com/clean-it/weekly-chore-schedule/

 

 

 



Quote:
Originally Posted by cat13 View Post

I just got back from a visit to my Women's Health doc, who I love. I've been on the mini pill but she said I need to switch to another kind as soon as DS starts STTN (doubt that will happy anytime soon) or eating solids. So, she prescribed me another kind of pill and I'll just get the pharmacy to fill it when I'm ready. I actually HATE the pill, but right now my insurance will make me pay $500 for the Mirena IUD. I absolutely loved my Mirena before and had it for about 3 years. I got my BFP about 6 weeks after I had it removed. She said that our HMO is having a big change up in Aug and she hopes the Mirena will be covered 100% then, so I'm stuck with the pill for now.

 

But in all honesty, I really don't even need anything, since we rarely DTD anymore. I lost my sex drive at about 8 months preggo and now I don't just lack a sex drive, but I don't even want to be touched at all (I hear you Carrie). I do stuff for DH occasionally so he doesn't go crazy, but I don't want anything for me. It's sad because I feel like it's distancing us a bit. I'm just thankful that we can talk openly about it and he is sympathetic. Ugh.



I was hoping to avoid the pill too, but I'll choose that over an IUD.  I had a bad experience with the Mirena, so it's not for me, unfortunately.  Hopefully yours is covered by insurance!  That's a lot to pay out of pocket!!

 

I'm the same way.  Sad b/c that distance is there, but happy b/c we are doing the best we can.  His way of showing me love now just has to be different.  I don't mind doing stuff for DH, and I try to keep track of the last time I did something so I can initiate and make it seem like less of a pity act (ha, which is isn't, but you know what I mean).

post #40 of 95
Quote:
Originally Posted by Baby_Cakes View Post



Well, I will clarify that he didn't say he wanted more.  He just said he wasn't ready to say no more ever.  So it's not like he wants one and I don't.  It's like he's not sure he never will.  I can respect that.  You know?


Totally. :)

 

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